https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/dogs-shouldnt-be-cops SubwayTakes Wiki en 2026-05-08T18:10:29.000Z Dogs shouldn't be cops https://i.ytimg.com/vi/XWsxuAYPXPA/maxresdefault.jpg Dogs shouldn't be cops The guest argues dogs shouldn't be cops because they can't consent to working with "the oppressor" and don't get paid. The conversation spirals into whether animals should work at all, with agreement that dogs could be influencers instead. Best bit: they decide Golden Retrievers can save lives but shouldn't be narcs at TSA. Let dogs smuggle for drug lords, apparently. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XWsxuAYPXPA https://www.youtube.com/embed/XWsxuAYPXPA 123 2026-05-08T18:10:29.000Z 73119 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/we-all-need-to-blame-ourselves-a-little-bit-more-feat-z SubwayTakes Wiki en 2026-05-07T15:21:32.000Z We all need to blame ourselves a little bit more. Feat. Z https://i.ytimg.com/vi/4RGA6yJHlQ4/maxresdefault.jpg We all need to blame ourselves a little bit more. Feat. Z Guest Z drops a spicy take that people need to blame themselves more instead of pointing fingers at everyone else. She argues that avoiding accountability is easier than looking in the mirror and doing something about your problems. The host vibes with it hard. Both admit they used to blame others constantly until they realized they were the ones messing up. It's your fault, and that's okay. The clickbait energy is real, and they know it. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4RGA6yJHlQ4 https://www.youtube.com/embed/4RGA6yJHlQ4 122 2026-05-07T15:21:32.000Z 153663 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/songwriting-is-not-something-that-you-necessarily-get-better-at-the-more-you-do SubwayTakes Wiki en 2026-05-06T17:08:25.000Z Songwriting is not something that you necessarily get better at the more you do it https://i.ytimg.com/vi/SDXt0xMVkBM/maxresdefault.jpg Songwriting is not something that you necessarily get better at the more you do it Rostam Batmanglij argues that songwriting doesn't necessarily improve with practice since complexity doesn't equal emotional impact. The host pushes back, bringing up Picasso's quote about learning to paint like a child. Rostam concedes he did get better for a while, but insists the path isn't linear. It's chaotic. The host ends with confidence: "The best is yet to come. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SDXt0xMVkBM https://www.youtube.com/embed/SDXt0xMVkBM 122 2026-05-06T17:08:25.000Z 54576 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/politicians-should-wear-who-sponsors-them-all-over-their-clothes-london-zackpola SubwayTakes Wiki en 2026-05-05T17:28:48.000Z Politicians should wear who sponsors them all over their clothes. (📍London) @ZackPolanskiGreen https://i.ytimg.com/vi/5nTyqYEv2bs/maxresdefault.jpg Politicians should wear who sponsors them all over their clothes. (📍London) @ZackPolanskiGreen Kareem meets Zack Polanski Green, a Green Party politician in London, who argues politicians should display their sponsors on their clothes like footballers do. It's actually a George Carlin joke. But Zack insists it should be real policy. He explains that 95% of Green Party funding comes from small donations from regular members, which lets him speak freely without worrying about corporate interests. The two agree that corporate lobbying has basically destroyed democracy, and they wrap up debating whether politicians in sponsor covered ties would be acceptable. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5nTyqYEv2bs https://www.youtube.com/embed/5nTyqYEv2bs 131 2026-05-05T17:28:48.000Z 193579 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/a-guy-saying-i-would-like-to-make-love-to-you-is-an-ick-feat-charlize-theron SubwayTakes Wiki en 2026-05-05T17:25:33.000Z A guy saying, "I would like to make love to you” is an ick. Feat. Charlize Theron https://i.ytimg.com/vi/uoUZNw7_44o/maxresdefault.jpg A guy saying, "I would like to make love to you” is an ick. Feat. Charlize Theron The guest and host bond over how saying "I would like to make love to you" is an instant turnoff. They poll subway riders who unanimously agree the phrase is cringe-worthy, with one person noting their "vagina closes up" at hearing it. The consensus? Don't talk. Just act. Body language beats lovemaking talk every time. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uoUZNw7_44o https://www.youtube.com/embed/uoUZNw7_44o 128 2026-05-05T17:25:33.000Z 15903 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/charlize-theron-defends-her-5-most-controversial-takes SubwayTakes Wiki en 2026-05-05T13:15:03.000Z Charlize Theron Defends Her 5 Most Controversial Takes https://i.ytimg.com/vi/VP5LIAWLTWk/maxresdefault.jpg Charlize Theron Defends Her 5 Most Controversial Takes Charlize Theron breaks down her biggest icks with Kareem Rahma, starting with why saying "I want to make love to you" is an instant turnoff. She's brutally honest about it. The conversation shifts to her hatred of long emails, insisting people keep messages to a single paragraph because nobody has time to read novels. She also demonstrates the proper one-finger subway pole technique, calling out anyone who grips it with their whole hand. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VP5LIAWLTWk https://www.youtube.com/embed/VP5LIAWLTWk 1640 2026-05-05T13:15:03.000Z 23686 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/there-should-be-a-size-cap-on-dildos-stephssimon SubwayTakes Wiki en 2026-05-04T14:01:12.000Z There should be a size cap on dildos. @stephssimon https://i.ytimg.com/vi/twyeeF8Dvhw/maxresdefault.jpg There should be a size cap on dildos. @stephssimon Steph argues that dildos are way too big compared to average penis size, but her real point goes deeper. She thinks sex toys are engineered for quick outcomes instead of actual intimacy, which affects how people connect with partners. The conversation gets hilariously awkward when she pulls out visual aids. The best moment? When the host declares that Steve Jobs said everyone's got ten dildos on their bodies, meaning fingers. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=twyeeF8Dvhw https://www.youtube.com/embed/twyeeF8Dvhw 129 2026-05-04T14:01:12.000Z 29323 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/the-internet-should-have-a-curfew-feat-slawn-london SubwayTakes Wiki en 2026-05-01T14:03:13.000Z The internet should have a curfew. Feat. Slawn (📍London) https://i.ytimg.com/vi/pzi2RVX7TCg/maxresdefault.jpg The internet should have a curfew. Feat. Slawn (📍London) Slawn thinks the internet, or at least social media, should have a curfew like the stock market. He's arguing for an 8pm weekday shutdown so people actually go outside and play football with friends. The conversation gets wild when he casually reveals he threw his phone away and now just knocks on people's doors to reach them. Oh, and he's stopped masturbating since ditching his phone. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pzi2RVX7TCg https://www.youtube.com/embed/pzi2RVX7TCg 122 2026-05-01T14:03:13.000Z 163022 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/pigeons-deserve-to-be-treated-better-noah-chenfeld SubwayTakes Wiki en 2026-04-30T13:47:47.000Z Pigeons deserve to be treated better. @noah_chenfeld https://i.ytimg.com/vi/W_DwrccdbwI/maxresdefault.jpg Pigeons deserve to be treated better. @noah_chenfeld Host Kareem Rahma meets Noah Chenfeld, who passionately defends pigeons as misunderstood creatures we've unfairly vilified. They're not disease carriers. European settlers brought them here in the 1600s, they adapted brilliantly to city life, and they actually help us by eating garbage. The conversation spirals into defending rats too, celebrating getting pooped on for good luck, and ends with Noah plugging his band's upcoming show dedicated to pigeons. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=W_DwrccdbwI https://www.youtube.com/embed/W_DwrccdbwI 132 2026-04-30T13:47:47.000Z 179669 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/normalize-licking-plates-clean-in-restaurants-london-feat-daniyal-khan SubwayTakes Wiki en 2026-04-29T15:22:48.000Z Normalize licking plates clean in restaurants. (📍London) Feat. Daniyal Khan https://i.ytimg.com/vi/KP3EFzhJ2ow/maxresdefault.jpg Normalize licking plates clean in restaurants. (📍London) Feat. Daniyal Khan Daniyal Khan wants everyone to lick their plates clean at restaurants, arguing that leaving sauce behind is wasteful and has contributed to society's problems. He references France's "saucy" and Italy's "scarpetta" (mopping up sauce with bread) but thinks we should skip the bread and just use our tongues. He even shows off a literally licked clean plate. The conversation gets weird when they try teaching each other British versus American pronunciations. Daniyal promises to "stop the fuck out of all the plates" when he visits New York. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KP3EFzhJ2ow https://www.youtube.com/embed/KP3EFzhJ2ow 131 2026-04-29T15:22:48.000Z 125748 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/cocktail-glasses-need-a-rebrand-brittany-broski SubwayTakes Wiki en 2026-04-28T14:01:14.000Z Cocktail glasses need a rebrand. @Brittany_Broski https://i.ytimg.com/vi/W3RCDp9zaKM/maxresdefault.jpg Cocktail glasses need a rebrand. @Brittany_Broski Brittany Broski rants about how cocktail glasses all suck. Wine glasses make you feel like a Neanderthal, martini glasses spill everywhere, and margarita glasses are too big and always wet. Her solution? Sippy cups for adults. But then they go off on how much they hate the infantilization of millennials, from corporate dodgeball to "I'm just baby" culture. Somehow Fred Armisen's fake cemetery gets brought up. It's millennial coded, apparently. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=W3RCDp9zaKM https://www.youtube.com/embed/W3RCDp9zaKM 160 2026-04-28T14:01:14.000Z 303821 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/brittany-broski-defends-her-5-most-controversial-takes SubwayTakes Wiki en 2026-04-28T13:15:03.000Z Brittany Broski Defends Her 5 Most Controversial Takes https://i.ytimg.com/vi/JhzG679n2RY/maxresdefault.jpg Brittany Broski Defends Her 5 Most Controversial Takes Brittany Broski goes off about cocktail glasses being terribly designed, from wine glass stems that feel weak to martini glasses that spill everywhere. She wants sippy cups for adults instead. The conversation spirals into roasting millennials for acting like babies at work dodgeball events and pizza parties. Kareem agrees it's cringe. They need to grow up and get 401ks already. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JhzG679n2RY https://www.youtube.com/embed/JhzG679n2RY 1765 2026-04-28T13:15:03.000Z 86841 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/if-aliens-landed-on-earth-people-would-stop-caring-after-2-weeks-twotreehilloffi SubwayTakes Wiki en 2026-04-27T15:14:51.000Z If aliens landed on Earth, people would stop caring after 2 weeks. @twotreehillofficial https://i.ytimg.com/vi/pqxG5aRypo0/maxresdefault.jpg If aliens landed on Earth, people would stop caring after 2 weeks. @twotreehillofficial The guest argues that if aliens actually landed on Earth, people would stop caring after just two weeks because we're so desensitized. The conversation immediately derails into whether humans would want to have sex with aliens. Things get weirder from there. The discussion somehow pivots to whether aliens would face the same treatment as immigrants, complete with their own Epcot booth, and includes an uncomfortable attempt to rank races with aliens included. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pqxG5aRypo0 https://www.youtube.com/embed/pqxG5aRypo0 140 2026-04-27T15:14:51.000Z 310080 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/we-should-be-allowed-to-discriminate-people-based-on-their-hygienelondon SubwayTakes Wiki en 2026-04-24T14:21:13.000Z We should be allowed to discriminate people based on their hygiene.(📍London) https://i.ytimg.com/vi/GycvflgrmeQ/maxresdefault.jpg We should be allowed to discriminate people based on their hygiene.(📍London) A guest argues people should be discriminated against based on hygiene, sparking an absurd escalation about apps that track "stinky people," separate train lines for the unclean, and enforcement agents with hoses. The host pushes back but gets pulled into the chaos. It gets wild fast. They debate hygiene credit scores, armpit exposure on railings, and whether babies smell good. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GycvflgrmeQ https://www.youtube.com/embed/GycvflgrmeQ 127 2026-04-24T14:21:13.000Z 187536 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/being-an-only-child-is-the-fcking-best-londonfeat-maia-tassalini SubwayTakes Wiki en 2026-04-23T14:52:13.000Z Being an only child is the f*cking best. (📍London)Feat. Maia Tassalini https://i.ytimg.com/vi/hWp1hd4MXU4/maxresdefault.jpg Being an only child is the f*cking best. (📍London)Feat. Maia Tassalini Maia Tassalini passionately defends being an only child against a skeptical host who thinks only children are selfish bullies. Maia fires back with terms like "sibling industrial complex" and calls the host's view fascist, arguing that friends exist and siblings just fight over iPads anyway. She barely lets the host speak. The host admits Maia ruined their day. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hWp1hd4MXU4 https://www.youtube.com/embed/hWp1hd4MXU4 126 2026-04-23T14:52:13.000Z 409676 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/we-have-the-climate-solutions-we-need-we-just-need-to-fcking-implement-them SubwayTakes Wiki en 2026-04-22T14:54:19.000Z We have the climate solutions we need, we just need to f*cking implement them https://i.ytimg.com/vi/mxZRnFGYRHw/maxresdefault.jpg We have the climate solutions we need, we just need to f*cking implement them A guest argues we already have all the climate solutions but aren't implementing them because fossil fuel interests and doom narratives get in the way. The conversation covers electrifying transport, protecting ecosystems (which could solve 20 to 30% of problems), and making implementation sexy. Best moment: "Stop trying to be a DJ" when discussing how we need more electricians and tradespeople to actually build our clean energy future. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mxZRnFGYRHw https://www.youtube.com/embed/mxZRnFGYRHw 150 2026-04-22T14:54:19.000Z 163664 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/stop-with-the-long-audio-text-messages-feat-julian-casablancas SubwayTakes Wiki en 2026-04-21T16:26:34.000Z Stop with the long audio text messages. Feat. Julian Casablancas https://i.ytimg.com/vi/iBMclDmAotM/maxresdefault.jpg Stop with the long audio text messages. Feat. Julian Casablancas Julian Casablancas from The Strokes hates long voice memos, calling them a "Trojan horse voicemail." The host defends sending minute-long audio texts in his buttery voice. They banter about brown relatives loving voice notes and whether Subway Takes beats Jimmy Fallon. Julian even sings a Strokes song on the train. Then things get real when he pitches a populist anti-billionaire party. The host jokes that white guys with manifestos are usually bad news. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iBMclDmAotM https://www.youtube.com/embed/iBMclDmAotM 166 2026-04-21T16:26:34.000Z 242275 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/julian-casablancas-defends-his-4-most-controversial-takes SubwayTakes Wiki en 2026-04-21T13:15:19.000Z Julian Casablancas Defends His 4 Most Controversial Takes https://i.ytimg.com/vi/r3j2X4kLxTo/maxresdefault.jpg Julian Casablancas Defends His 4 Most Controversial Takes Julian Casablancas joins Kareem Rahma to defend his spiciest takes on creativity, politics, and modern life. They bond over hating voice messages and today's ugly touchscreen cars before Julian drops his real thesis: conservatives and progressives should team up against corporate billionaires instead of fighting each other. He's not chasing fame. He admits he comes out of his cave every four years to perform, then goes right back to work on what actually matters. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=r3j2X4kLxTo https://www.youtube.com/embed/r3j2X4kLxTo 1280 2026-04-21T13:15:19.000Z 137995 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/expat-is-a-racist-as-hell-termlondon-mmisanspeaks SubwayTakes Wiki en 2026-04-20T14:40:32.000Z Expat is a racist as hell term.(📍London) @M@Misanspeaks https://i.ytimg.com/vi/iAxqIk2cnZQ/maxresdefault.jpg Expat is a racist as hell term.(📍London) @M@Misanspeaks Host Kareem interviews a guest in London who argues that "expat" is a racist term because white people from rich countries get called expats while others are labeled immigrants for doing the same thing. They also critique "people of color" as a phrase. The conversation gets real. They discuss resistance, free Palestine, and how Congolese people suffer for Western tech consumption. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iAxqIk2cnZQ https://www.youtube.com/embed/iAxqIk2cnZQ 122 2026-04-20T14:40:32.000Z 534493 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/smartphones-are-evil-theyre-ruining-society-and-we-need-to-just-stop SubwayTakes Wiki en 2026-04-17T14:46:57.000Z Smartphones are evil, they’re ruining society, and we need to just stop https://i.ytimg.com/vi/XJvf6r5Fleg/maxresdefault.jpg Smartphones are evil, they’re ruining society, and we need to just stop A guest argues smartphones are ruining society and even destroying things like subway maps, which have become useless abstract art since everyone just uses their phones. The host pushes back at first but then admits he's totally addicted, confessing he hasn't taken a piss without his phone in 20 years. The guest calls it "mental genocide" and gives the host a flip phone on camera to save him. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XJvf6r5Fleg https://www.youtube.com/embed/XJvf6r5Fleg 106 2026-04-17T14:46:57.000Z 190153 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/winking-is-a-lost-art-and-it-deserves-a-renaissance-london SubwayTakes Wiki en 2026-04-16T14:56:53.000Z Winking is a lost art and it deserves a renaissance. (📍London) https://i.ytimg.com/vi/Ubt8aQZnuxg/maxresdefault.jpg Winking is a lost art and it deserves a renaissance. (📍London) A guest argues winking deserves a comeback after her boyfriend's dad gave her a sweet, non-creepy wink at Christmas dinner. She and her friend talk through when winks work best: complimenting someone, telling cheesy jokes, flirting, or giving up your seat. The key? Always pair it with a smile. They agree winking is basically a physical emoji and people should ditch the digital version for real life charisma. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ubt8aQZnuxg https://www.youtube.com/embed/Ubt8aQZnuxg 125 2026-04-16T14:56:53.000Z 301167 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/having-sisters-is-a-complete-advantage-growing-up-as-a-guy SubwayTakes Wiki en 2026-04-15T14:35:46.000Z Having sisters is a complete advantage growing up as a guy https://i.ytimg.com/vi/outXJPb_tUk/maxresdefault.jpg Having sisters is a complete advantage growing up as a guy A guy makes the case that growing up with sisters gives you a massive edge in life. He argues that having sisters teaches you how to talk to women, understand their perspectives, and generally not be clueless around them. It's all about that built-in advantage. The guest seems pretty convinced this shaped who he is today. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=outXJPb_tUk https://www.youtube.com/embed/outXJPb_tUk 100 2026-04-15T14:35:46.000Z 382597 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/normalize-eating-on-the-subway SubwayTakes Wiki en 2026-04-14T14:39:44.000Z Normalize eating on the subway https://i.ytimg.com/vi/mXCPEo2cadI/maxresdefault.jpg Normalize eating on the subway A straphanger makes her case for normalizing eating on the subway while literally holding a Papa John's sandwich. She argues the train is basically a restaurant booth and refuses to let anyone tell her otherwise. "You have to liberate yourself," she tells Kareem. "A restaurant is whatever you want it to be." There are rules, though: nothing smelly, nothing you wouldn't microwave at an office, and you must leave no crumbs. The conversation spirals into whether laptops or sandwiches are worse on the train (laptops mean "you are going to do something bad to our country"), why the MTA doesn't have cafe cars, and whether spaghetti crosses the line. Kareem ends up taking a bite of her sandwich. He's hungry. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mXCPEo2cadI https://www.youtube.com/embed/mXCPEo2cadI 119 2026-04-14T14:39:44.000Z 63402 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/society-massively-undervalues-ugliness-london SubwayTakes Wiki en 2026-04-13T13:36:02.000Z Society massively undervalues ugliness. (📍London) https://i.ytimg.com/vi/BRAcZzCBeDI/maxresdefault.jpg Society massively undervalues ugliness. (📍London) A rider in London argues that society's obsession with beauty has created a bland monoculture where nothing truly stands out. Ugliness matters. It's where experimentation happens, where authentic beauty gets discovered. Kareem agrees, pointing to old buildings that look disgusting but somehow end up beautiful because of it. The conversation shifts to faces and film, lamenting how everyone on screen now looks the same thanks to cosmetic trends. "I miss people like Steve Buscemi," the rider says. They both agree it's time to bring back ugly faces in TV and film. The world's already plenty ugly in other ways, but if the visual ugliness matched the horror, maybe people would actually do something about it instead of staying complacent in their pretty, boring bubble. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BRAcZzCBeDI https://www.youtube.com/embed/BRAcZzCBeDI 109 2026-04-13T13:36:02.000Z 241015 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/utensils-are-blocking-your-blessings SubwayTakes Wiki en 2026-04-10T16:40:12.000Z Utensils are blocking your blessings https://i.ytimg.com/vi/M6pe6yWwRBU/maxresdefault.jpg Utensils are blocking your blessings Utensils are blocking your blessings, according to a rider who insists food tastes better when eaten with your hands. His logic? There are nerve endings in your fingertips, so you taste food three times: when you touch it, when you eat it, and from the residue. He'll eat steak with his hands, no problem. Salad, though? That's where he draws the line, even after Kareem mentions another rider named Nor who eats Caesar salad by hand. The philosophy comes from a childhood trip to Djibouti, where his uncle forced him to eat from a communal plate. He refused at first. His uncle slapped him, shoved the food in his mouth, and changed his life forever. Now he's all hands, all the time. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=M6pe6yWwRBU https://www.youtube.com/embed/M6pe6yWwRBU 126 2026-04-10T16:40:12.000Z 453300 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/theres-too-much-art-and-there-are-too-many-artists SubwayTakes Wiki en 2026-04-09T16:03:25.000Z There's too much art and there are too many artists https://i.ytimg.com/vi/AwD9iHTXKVs/maxresdefault.jpg There's too much art and there are too many artists There's too much art and there are too many artists," a passenger tells Kareem, kicking off a debate about the internet's impact on creative culture. The rider argues that low barriers to entry have flooded the world with content creators chasing tiny audiences on Patreon instead of developing taste and appreciation. Everyone wants to be an artist. Nobody wants to be in the audience anymore. The solution? Stop creating until you're actually good, because "a podcast for your 50 friends" isn't a podcast, it's just a group chat. Kareem pushes back, defending the value of working things out in public and failing upwards. The passenger admits they like the attention. That's the whole problem right there. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AwD9iHTXKVs https://www.youtube.com/embed/AwD9iHTXKVs 125 2026-04-09T16:03:25.000Z 241507 yes