https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/normalize-eating-on-the-subway 2026-04-15T06:32:05.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/mXCPEo2cadI/maxresdefault.jpg Normalize eating on the subway A straphanger makes her case for normalizing eating on the subway while literally holding a Papa John's sandwich. She argues the train is basically a restaurant booth and refuses to let anyone tell her otherwise. "You have to liberate yourself," she tells Kareem. "A restaurant is whatever you want it to be." There are rules, though: nothing smelly, nothing you wouldn't microwave at an office, and you must leave no crumbs. The conversation spirals into whether laptops or sandwiches are worse on the train (laptops mean "you are going to do something bad to our country"), why the MTA doesn't have cafe cars, and whether spaghetti crosses the line. Kareem ends up taking a bite of her sandwich. He's hungry. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mXCPEo2cadI https://www.youtube.com/embed/mXCPEo2cadI 119 2026-04-14T14:39:44.000Z 63402 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/society-massively-undervalues-ugliness-london 2026-04-15T06:32:13.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/BRAcZzCBeDI/maxresdefault.jpg Society massively undervalues ugliness. (📍London) A rider in London argues that society's obsession with beauty has created a bland monoculture where nothing truly stands out. Ugliness matters. It's where experimentation happens, where authentic beauty gets discovered. Kareem agrees, pointing to old buildings that look disgusting but somehow end up beautiful because of it. The conversation shifts to faces and film, lamenting how everyone on screen now looks the same thanks to cosmetic trends. "I miss people like Steve Buscemi," the rider says. They both agree it's time to bring back ugly faces in TV and film. The world's already plenty ugly in other ways, but if the visual ugliness matched the horror, maybe people would actually do something about it instead of staying complacent in their pretty, boring bubble. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BRAcZzCBeDI https://www.youtube.com/embed/BRAcZzCBeDI 109 2026-04-13T13:36:02.000Z 241015 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/utensils-are-blocking-your-blessings 2026-04-15T06:32:19.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/M6pe6yWwRBU/maxresdefault.jpg Utensils are blocking your blessings Utensils are blocking your blessings, according to a rider who insists food tastes better when eaten with your hands. His logic? There are nerve endings in your fingertips, so you taste food three times: when you touch it, when you eat it, and from the residue. He'll eat steak with his hands, no problem. Salad, though? That's where he draws the line, even after Kareem mentions another rider named Nor who eats Caesar salad by hand. The philosophy comes from a childhood trip to Djibouti, where his uncle forced him to eat from a communal plate. He refused at first. His uncle slapped him, shoved the food in his mouth, and changed his life forever. Now he's all hands, all the time. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=M6pe6yWwRBU https://www.youtube.com/embed/M6pe6yWwRBU 126 2026-04-10T16:40:12.000Z 453300 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/theres-too-much-art-and-there-are-too-many-artists 2026-04-15T06:32:32.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/AwD9iHTXKVs/maxresdefault.jpg There's too much art and there are too many artists There's too much art and there are too many artists," a passenger tells Kareem, kicking off a debate about the internet's impact on creative culture. The rider argues that low barriers to entry have flooded the world with content creators chasing tiny audiences on Patreon instead of developing taste and appreciation. Everyone wants to be an artist. Nobody wants to be in the audience anymore. The solution? Stop creating until you're actually good, because "a podcast for your 50 friends" isn't a podcast, it's just a group chat. Kareem pushes back, defending the value of working things out in public and failing upwards. The passenger admits they like the attention. That's the whole problem right there. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AwD9iHTXKVs https://www.youtube.com/embed/AwD9iHTXKVs 125 2026-04-09T16:03:25.000Z 241507 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/you-should-use-chatgpt-instead-of-your-doctor 2026-04-15T06:32:38.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/dmLztS0m06k/maxresdefault.jpg You should use ChatGPT instead of your doctor A rider makes the provocative claim that ChatGPT beats doctors, arguing that physicians are "legal drug dealers" in Big Pharma's pocket. Kareem pushes back hard. ChatGPT can't take your pulse or write prescriptions. The conversation spirals into a debate about Adderall, with the rider revealing he was on 120 milligrams daily before quitting cold turkey in favor of adaptogens and gut health. When doctors wanted him on blood pressure meds at 25, he did his own research instead. Kareem counters with a wild story about ChatGPT apparently telling someone they're in the Matrix, leading to a fatal police confrontation. The rider's never heard of it. This one's messy, opinionated, and all over the place. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dmLztS0m06k https://www.youtube.com/embed/dmLztS0m06k 115 2026-04-08T13:32:11.000Z 164116 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/old-ethnic-women-need-to-understand-the-words-on-the-shirts-they-buy-before-they 2026-04-15T06:32:43.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/PR65TsnTqMI/maxresdefault.jpg Old ethnic women need to understand the words on the shirts they buy before they buy them A straphanger wants old ethnic women to understand what their shirts say before they buy them. Kareem's not having it. The conversation spirals into a hilarious debate about inappropriate slogans, with the rider recounting how his grandma once wore a shirt that said "season" when he was 14. He made her change it. Kareem pushes back, insisting that grandma might actually know what she's wearing and maybe she's just keeping it spicy. The rider wavers, briefly considering a new take before Kareem stops him. Stand on it. By the end, they've looped back to the original position, though the rider's clearly been shaken by the possibility that his "pure grandma" might be hiding something. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PR65TsnTqMI https://www.youtube.com/embed/PR65TsnTqMI 106 2026-04-07T14:10:15.000Z 717826 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/we-need-to-introduce-height-zones-at-concerts-london 2026-04-15T06:32:49.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/bzr6crZFIfA/maxresdefault.jpg We need to introduce height zones at concerts. (London) A woman on the Tube argues that concerts need height zones, with anyone 5'5" and under claiming the front rows while taller fans get relegated to the back. She tells Kareem about getting elbowed in the face by a "7ft skyscraper" at a show in Brighton last week, leaving her with a busted lip for the rest of the night. Kareem pitches an amusement park style system with measuring sticks at security. The conversation spirals into observations about who actually dances at concerts (short girls and tall guys, apparently, while short men just stand there), then veers into a confused civics lesson about governors. She's dead serious about the UK government implementing this policy. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bzr6crZFIfA https://www.youtube.com/embed/bzr6crZFIfA 108 2026-04-06T13:50:11.000Z 407833 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/we-need-to-filter-people-who-are-able-to-move-to-nyc-via-a-test 2026-04-15T06:32:56.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/WYzsuQ-Eiok/maxresdefault.jpg We need to filter people who are able to move to NYC via a test A straphanger proposes filtering NYC newcomers through an MTA navigation test: three fares, no GPS, figure out your route. Kareem pushes back. The conversation spirals into nostalgic territory as the rider reminisces about leaving home with four quarters in the '90s, claiming kids back then were more adult than today's grownups just from subway skills alone. They trade rapid-fire route challenges. Central Park to Brooklyn Museum? Take the Q. Canal to Empire State? Multiple options. The test expands beyond trains into a broader gatekeeping philosophy: can you walk fast, climb stairs without huffing, text while moving through crowds? The rider insists real New Yorkers know which stations to avoid at night, name-dropping Broadway Junction as sketchy after dark. Kareem loves Broadway Junction, naturally. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WYzsuQ-Eiok https://www.youtube.com/embed/WYzsuQ-Eiok 117 2026-04-03T18:12:33.000Z 585092 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/cat-owners-are-weird-london 2026-04-15T06:33:01.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/FZmL_X4Qv5M/maxresdefault.jpg Cat owners are weird . (London) Cat owners are "buie," according to a Tube rider who sparks a heated debate with Kareem about the weirdness of feline enthusiasts. Kareem fires back with his own defense, revealing he owns two hairless cats specifically to avoid kitchen fur problems. The conversation careens wildly from cat hair to restaurant aesthetics to the philosophical question of whether freedom is actually free, with both agreeing the Western world might be in big trouble. They bond over their mutual appreciation despite disagreeing on nearly everything. The rider invites Kareem for tea, and honestly, after that whirlwind exchange, they've earned it. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FZmL_X4Qv5M https://www.youtube.com/embed/FZmL_X4Qv5M 118 2026-04-02T15:07:45.000Z 262161 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/theres-two-kinds-of-people-cool-uncool-uncool-people-are-evil 2026-04-15T06:33:07.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/02F8DBCjdfc/maxresdefault.jpg There's two kinds of people, cool & uncool, & uncool people are evil There's just two kinds of people: cool and uncool," a straphanger tells Kareem, arguing that contrary to popular belief, the uncool ones are actually evil. Kareem pushes back. What about mid people? The rider insists they don't really exist, you're either cool-slash-good or uncool-slash-bad, citing artist Warhol as an example of someone who's undeniably both cool and good. But Kareem's companion isn't convinced, claiming most people fall somewhere in between. He'd even put himself in that category. "Regular looks, regular penis, regular personality," he says. The conversation winds through definitions of coolness, goodness, and whether being regular means being mid, with the rider making a surprisingly earnest case that free-spirited people with glamour aren't nefarious, they're the good ones. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=02F8DBCjdfc https://www.youtube.com/embed/02F8DBCjdfc 122 2026-04-01T13:14:12.000Z 233547 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/your-landlord-should-be-legally-required-to-say-thank-you-when-you-pay-rent 2026-04-15T06:33:13.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/qBDJjaXsHz4/maxresdefault.jpg Your landlord should be legally required to say "thank you" when you pay rent A straphanger in London drops an audacious proposal: landlords should be legally required to visit their tenants every month and say thank you when rent is paid. She's paying 70% of her income to someone who doesn't even know her bra size. Kareem agrees it's absurd. The conversation spirals from there: what if tenants got 60-day payment terms like freelancers? What if the invoice accidentally went to spam? The rider wants the person spending her money, buying loafers and paying school fees with her cash, to look her in the eye. They used to collect rent in person. Now management companies handle the dirty work while landlords stay invisible, extracting wealth without acknowledgment. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qBDJjaXsHz4 https://www.youtube.com/embed/qBDJjaXsHz4 110 2026-03-31T15:42:19.000Z 838187 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/we-should-get-rid-of-the-reclining-button-on-airplane-seats 2026-04-15T06:33:19.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/njGpt9BQVlo/maxresdefault.jpg We should get rid of the reclining button on airplane seats A straphanger brings the heat on airplane seat etiquette, arguing that reclining buttons should be abolished entirely. Kareem agrees. The problem is clear: airlines pretend to give passengers control when really the button just closes your laptop and ruins the person's day behind you. They debate the unwritten rules of flying, from middle seat armrest privileges to whether window seat passengers can keep the shade open (they disagree on that one). Shoes off is fine, but socks are mandatory and feet stay on the floor. No one wants to see a rogue toe. The takeaway? Either give passengers real space or stop the mockery of fake comfort. Reclining isn't neighborly, and on a ten-hour flight, it's worth speaking up. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=njGpt9BQVlo https://www.youtube.com/embed/njGpt9BQVlo 106 2026-03-30T15:13:21.000Z 426942 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/not-enough-people-know-how-to-do-magic-tricks-london 2026-04-15T06:33:24.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/qp05Ou2b5X8/maxresdefault.jpg Not enough people know how to do magic tricks . (📍London) A stranger in London makes a passionate case that not enough people know how to do magic tricks. He's got a point. Kareem agrees completely. The two bond over the universal awe of sleight of hand, card tricks, coins appearing from nowhere, and mentalists who somehow know your ex-girlfriend's name was Vanessa and left a note in your pocket to prove it. The guest admits he once had a magic kit but wasn't any good at it, which makes his advocacy all the more endearing. Their conclusion? Everyone needs exactly one trick in their bag. That's it. One solid party trick, because "a party trick is literally really just a magic trick that you do at a party." The logic is bulletproof. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qp05Ou2b5X8 https://www.youtube.com/embed/qp05Ou2b5X8 111 2026-03-28T13:00:00.000Z 314723 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/i-should-be-the-next-james-bond-london 2026-04-15T06:33:32.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/j9SppbMGTko/maxresdefault.jpg I should be the next James Bond . (London) A London rider in a sharp suit declares he should be the next James Bond, kicking off a spirited debate with Kareem about who's better suited for 007. The stranger claims MI6, MI5, and military intelligence have approached him three times in real life, including once after his first film when agents "put me in arm locks, tried to break my wrist." Kareem argues he's the better choice. The rider counters with practical tradecraft: a 6'7" blue-eyed guy would get "smoked" walking through the bazaars in Karachi, but he could sneak through unnoticed. When Kareem asks for his Bond introduction, the response is deliberately understated: "The name's Bond. James Bond. How you doing? How's your day?" His pitch is radical realism, arguing audiences are tired of fake action and want to see what a 2026 secret agent actually looks like. Kareem eventually concedes. The rider suggests Kareem could play a villain instead, a passive aggressive uncle asking, "When are you getting a real job, James? https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=j9SppbMGTko https://www.youtube.com/embed/j9SppbMGTko 177 2026-03-27T13:28:48.000Z 1328814 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/new-york-city-breakfast-scene-is-mid 2026-04-15T06:33:38.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/U2lYrImORBc/maxresdefault.jpg New York City breakfast scene is mid A straphanger mourns the death of NYC's classic breakfast scene, arguing that diners are "getting extinct by the day" and New Yorkers are stuck choosing between deli sandwiches or hundred-dollar salmon carpaccio brunches. He wants blueberry pancakes, eggs, sausage, and syrup. A big boy breakfast. Kareem agrees but pushes back on the total doom and gloom, shouting out Baby Blues Lunch and Net for "innovating with breakfast" using halloumi cheese. The conversation veers into the rider's signature sandwich at Anthony and Sons: pastrami with Swiss cheese, caramelized onions, a potato croquette on garlic bread with hot honey and mustard. Kareem tries to claim it as their shared sandwich. The rider refuses. They argue about breakfast bars, bacon egg and cheese bagels, and whether eating one softboiled egg as a grown man is acceptable. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=U2lYrImORBc https://www.youtube.com/embed/U2lYrImORBc 140 2026-03-26T16:19:48.000Z 2516780 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/the-algorithm-knows-your-kids-better-than-you-feat-protonprivacy 2026-04-15T06:33:44.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/2hpcS9AwNDU/maxresdefault.jpg The algorithm knows your kids better than you . Feat @ProtonPrivacy The algorithm knows your kids better than you, according to a rider who worries about facial recognition in photo apps collecting data on his two young children. Kareem and the stranger discuss how sharing photos reveals more than what's visible to the human eye. Location data, timestamps, and facial scans all get scooped up. The conversation shifts to email privacy and encryption, with the rider comparing unencrypted emails to postcards that anyone can read. He lands a job offer as "chief imagination officer" after explaining end-to-end encryption. The sponsor, Proton, pitches reserving private email addresses for kids before they're old enough to understand what a digital profile means. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2hpcS9AwNDU https://www.youtube.com/embed/2hpcS9AwNDU 118 2026-03-25T16:08:01.000Z 173314 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/men-who-want-to-be-djs-should-have-to-go-to-trade-school-first 2026-04-15T06:33:49.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/hF8MsstPX_Y/maxresdefault.jpg Men who want to be DJs should have to go to trade school first A woman on the subway argues that aspiring DJs should be required to attend trade school before touching the decks. Her logic? The city needs more plumbers and stonemasons, not another bro downtown spinning tracks for vibes. She tells Kareem that DJ culture needs "de-urbanization" while trade skills need urbanization, and besides, DJs are getting replaced by AI first anyway. The conversation spirals into whether she can build a bookshelf (yes, out of hardwood, not rubber wood), her favorite tool (a Phillips number two screwdriver), and which groups get exempted from her proposed rule. Gay people and women can DJ however they want, she insists. Life isn't fair. Kareem reveals he's thinking about becoming a DJ and opening for the Chainsmokers at Madison Square Garden, which lands with a thud. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hF8MsstPX_Y https://www.youtube.com/embed/hF8MsstPX_Y 109 2026-03-24T14:38:21.000Z 612414 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/you-should-constantly-be-reinventing-yourself 2026-04-15T06:33:56.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/8qIQ6Em6rkY/maxresdefault.jpg You should constantly be reinventing yourself. A stranger on the train tells Kareem you should constantly be reinventing yourself to find the best version, but don't land on evil. Kareem confesses he's been evil before, though he insists being good is what got him where he is today. The conversation spirals into wardrobe evolution. His companion reveals she found a two-inch chest hair and kept it as a good luck charm. They swap sunglasses on the train. Kareem admits he used to be a Midwestern guy in tweed and skinny jeans, went through an all-black phase, and recently switched from soft shoes to rock-hard boots. Today she's wearing a long skirt for the first time, feeling a new breeze, while Kareem's wearing knee-high boots despite his extremely wide calves from being so jacked. Everyone's invited to squeeze his shredded arm. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8qIQ6Em6rkY https://www.youtube.com/embed/8qIQ6Em6rkY 133 2026-03-23T14:29:54.000Z 1448716 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/im-kind-of-cool-with-gulf-of-america-as-a-name 2026-04-15T06:34:01.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/qXJuSZZ5_RI/maxresdefault.jpg I'm kind of cool with Gulf of America as a name A stranger surprises Kareem by agreeing that "Gulf of America" works as a name. What follows is a spirited riff on geographic naming rights, colonial history, and why renaming things is actually pretty normal. The rider points out that the Mayans called it "Naha," meaning "great water," and that plenty of countries go by different names depending on who's talking. Germany is Deutschland. Japan is Nippon. And Iraq? "They renamed my dad's country an Apple product, bro." He admits there are "fascist undertones" to the recent rename depending on who changed it and why, but stripped of that context, he finds the whole thing electric. Kareem had prepared a whole argument assuming disagreement. He never got to use it. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qXJuSZZ5_RI https://www.youtube.com/embed/qXJuSZZ5_RI 100 2026-03-20T14:53:22.000Z 493431 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/barry-keoghan-dont-peel-my-boiled-eggs-for-me-feat-barry-keoghan 2026-04-15T06:34:06.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/Io6ZqTERp5w/maxresdefault.jpg Don’t peel my boiled eggs for me. Feat: Barry Keoghan Barry Keoghan has strong opinions about hard-boiled eggs. The actor refuses to let anyone peel them for him after once tasting someone's fingers on his breakfast ("I didn't ask for fish and eggs"). Kareem learns that Barry eats them roughly once a week, and that his Irish granny used to mash eggs and bread together in a mug. Her touch was fine, though. Holy water only. The conversation veers into other territory: Barry thinks the London Underground should display motivational quotes like "Comparison is the thief of joy" instead of just station names, and he's convinced those "prove you're a human" tests are backwards since robots could solve them faster than people anyway. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Io6ZqTERp5w https://www.youtube.com/embed/Io6ZqTERp5w 118 2026-03-19T14:48:23.000Z 776324 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/there-should-be-a-kids-section-on-flights 2026-04-15T06:34:11.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/WUW_HNM1JRI/maxresdefault.jpg There should be a kids section on flights A straphanger thinks there should be a kids section on flights, and Kareem immediately agrees. The conversation spirals from soundproofed airplane daycares to a bigger question: why is the world so unkid friendly when kids are "probably half the population"? They riff on restaurants for babies, gyms for babies, and special sections for pets too. The guest calls out fake service dogs ("No one has a service dog except for blind people"). Things get weird when someone declares dogs are haram. Then there's a tangent about a 50 gallon aquarium. Why can't you take that on a flight? https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WUW_HNM1JRI https://www.youtube.com/embed/WUW_HNM1JRI 111 2026-03-18T14:49:53.000Z 382715 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/if-you-have-botox-or-filler-i-dont-wanna-see-you-in-a-period-piece 2026-04-15T06:34:17.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/lxhzptDGKvk/maxresdefault.jpg If you have Botox or filler, I don't wanna see you in a period piece A straphanger has strong opinions about cosmetic procedures in historical dramas. If you've got Botox or filler, stay out of period pieces. The argument? Actors need to match "base reality" to let viewers suspend disbelief. She calls out the Mr. & Mrs. Smith reboot for featuring an assassin hiding in the woods with Instagram face, which immediately breaks immersion. Kareem pushes back with counterexamples, suggesting maybe everyone in Shakespeare should just be ugly. Not quite, she clarifies. Everyone's beautiful in their own way, but actors serve the story, not their vanity. There's wiggle room for camp though. Bridgerton gets a pass since it already has modern music and fantasy elements baked in. The conversation veers into breast implants (she's come around on them as an adult) and body modifications in general. Pro-tail, apparently. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lxhzptDGKvk https://www.youtube.com/embed/lxhzptDGKvk 121 2026-03-17T13:06:25.000Z 810034 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/posting-your-kids-publicly-online-is-the-same-as-leaving-them-at-a-gas-station 2026-04-15T06:34:23.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/V_Uw7RNXvAE/maxresdefault.jpg Posting your kids publicly online is the same as leaving them at a gas station Posting your kids publicly online is the same as leaving them at a gas station on a highway, according to one parent Kareem meets on the subway. She's got two girls and only posts them once a year, on Halloween, when they're in costume. A mild flex in disguise. Then she deletes it within eight hours. The conversation spirals into the horror of who's saving photos of random kids and why, the question of consent when your eighth-grade self is immortalized online forever, and whether abstinence from posting is the only real answer. Kareem agrees he'd ask his future kid for permission first, knowing full well she'd call him lame. It's completely open. Anyone could just look. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=V_Uw7RNXvAE https://www.youtube.com/embed/V_Uw7RNXvAE 121 2026-03-16T18:06:56.000Z 918728 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/i-feel-like-the-make-a-wish-kids-are-getting-finessed-a-little-bit 2026-04-15T06:34:30.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/3DritAem_Do/maxresdefault.jpg I feel like the Make-A-Wish kids are getting finessed a little bit A stranger on the subway delivers a controversial take: Make-A-Wish kids are getting "finessed" because they're meeting John Cena instead of getting better medical care. When Kareem pushes back, the rider doubles down with a simple argument: if you're dying, wouldn't you rather meet "the world champ of oncology" than a celebrity who shows up four hours late? Kareem Googles the top pediatric oncologist and finds Lisa Roth, MD, sparking an increasingly absurd debate about whether the foundation should scrap celebrity meet-and-greets entirely and just "fix cancer" instead. The logic gets wilder as the conversation goes on. After all, if we've got GLP-1 shots for weight loss and pills for baldness, why not redirect all that star power and funding toward actual cures? The rider insists this isn't sad, it's pro-science. There's a new wish in town: fix the kids. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3DritAem_Do https://www.youtube.com/embed/3DritAem_Do 120 2026-03-16T13:45:19.000Z 889537 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/ghosts-dont-exist 2026-04-15T06:34:36.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/fo7d-Qbzvtg/maxresdefault.jpg Ghosts don't exist A straphanger declares that ghosts don't exist, and Kareem fires back with immediate disagreement. The debate quickly spirals into bizarre territory when the stranger demands to know why we never see ghost animals. Where's the spectral squirrels? The phantom pigeons? Kareem counters with spirit animals and Native American traditions, but his opponent isn't having it. He had a parakeet named Tiny who mysteriously disappeared after getting into it with his mom, and if ghosts were real, Tiny would've visited. The conversation takes a sharp turn when Kareem admits he once summoned a jin that sexually assaulted him. Violently jerked him off, to be exact. His point? You just have to let spirits in. The grand finale: dinosaurs aren't real either. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fo7d-Qbzvtg https://www.youtube.com/embed/fo7d-Qbzvtg 117 2026-03-13T12:48:38.000Z 278338 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/iron-maiden-is-the-best-band-in-the-world 2026-04-15T04:35:02.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/NcFAlfF5HLs/maxresdefault.jpg Iron Maiden is the best band in the world The host meets a passionate metalhead who boldly declares Iron Maiden the greatest band on the planet. They're not holding back on this one. The interviewee makes their case for the legendary British band, bringing serious energy to defend their pick against any and all competition in rock history. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NcFAlfF5HLs https://www.youtube.com/embed/NcFAlfF5HLs 96 2026-03-12T13:00:11.000Z 447631 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/being-chill-is-cool-being-nonchalant-is-lame-be-chill-guy-this-summer-with-shark 2026-04-15T06:34:41.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/ptmEaAV11qI/maxresdefault.jpg Being chill is cool, being nonchalant is lame. Be chill guy this summer with @SharkHome ChillPill™ A stranger on the subway draws a sharp line between being chill and being nonchalant, and Kareem's all in. The difference? Chill people are curious and ask about your day. Nonchalant people pretend they don't remember your name after meeting you five times. That's lame. The conversation turns to summer, specifically the legendary Summer '16, when Drake was peaking, Obama was still cool, and the XXL Freshman Cipher gave us Uzi, Yachty, and 21 Savage. But the real prediction: Summer 2026 is "about to be the littest summer on record." Time to retire nonchalant guy forever and get chalant. The rider whips out a branded fan to stay literally chill in the heat, proving his point. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ptmEaAV11qI https://www.youtube.com/embed/ptmEaAV11qI 104 2026-03-11T17:16:38.000Z 353844 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/sagar-radia-live-football-games-are-better-enjoyed-from-your-sofa-than-the-stadium-ft-sagar 2026-04-15T06:34:48.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/45xmFmCwpJA/maxresdefault.jpg Live football games are better enjoyed from your sofa than the stadium. Ft. Sagar Radia Sagar Radia thinks live football games are better watched from your sofa than the stadium, sparking immediate pushback from Kareem. Radia wants his tea, his bathroom breaks, and zero massive dudes blocking his view while "swearing, most probably like being racist at the same time." Kareem counters with the irreplaceable energy of 50,000 people chanting together. He admits he doesn't even like sports but loves the stadium experience for the hot dogs and people watching. "You can't watch a guy drink 17 beers and get in a fight with his wife at my couch." Radia's not buying it. The commute home is brutal, the queues are endless, and everyone's drunk. His couch wins every time. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=45xmFmCwpJA https://www.youtube.com/embed/45xmFmCwpJA 122 2026-03-10T14:07:54.000Z 249506 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/if-you-blast-your-phone-audio-on-the-train-you-should-be-fined 2026-04-15T06:34:54.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/hQ3MypbWU4w/maxresdefault.jpg If you blast your phone audio on the train, you should be fined A rider with strong opinions thinks people who blast phone audio on the train should be fined, and that money should go directly to paying tickets for turnstile jumpers. Kareem mostly agrees, though he admits he kind of likes eavesdropping on other people's TikTok scrolling. The conversation spirals from there. The rider clarifies she's not talking about the JBL reggaeton speakers but the people flipping through reels at full volume, which she compares to "smoking on the subway." She carries spare AirPods to hand out. Kareem throws in a bizarre confession about asking people if he can look at their feet. They debate acceptable volume levels, whether the money should fund the MTA instead, and agree that FaceTiming in coffee shops deserves immediate ejection. The episode ends with a pitch to watch Subway Takes itself at full volume. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hQ3MypbWU4w https://www.youtube.com/embed/hQ3MypbWU4w 111 2026-03-09T18:08:34.000Z 310947 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/clean-up-our-toxic-sites-before-building-houses-and-schools-on-them 2026-04-15T06:34:59.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/HBvuke_3fXo/maxresdefault.jpg Clean up our toxic sites before building houses and schools on them A straphanger sounds the alarm on Gowanus, one of NYC's most contaminated neighborhoods. Kareem learns that the toxic waste near his recording studio goes down 160 feet to bedrock, a relic of a century of gas manufacturing that National Grid still hasn't properly cleaned up. The rider's concerned about plans to build low-income housing and a school on the site while the polluter tries to skimp on cleanup, maybe only tackling seven feet instead of the full depth. That's how you get babies with four eyeballs, they warn. The solution? Simple. Fix it. The plea goes straight to Governor Hochul and Mayor Adams to pay attention to Gowanus's environmental crisis before construction starts. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HBvuke_3fXo https://www.youtube.com/embed/HBvuke_3fXo 101 2026-03-06T15:11:50.000Z 301749 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/tupac-is-the-greatest-rapper-of-all-time-larussellgc 2026-04-15T06:35:05.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/mdZ49Zwo6xM/maxresdefault.jpg Tupac is the greatest rapper of all time. @larussellGC A straphanger declares Tupac the greatest rapper of all time, and Kareem initially pushes back before admitting he's "probably the goat." The conversation spirals into heated debate about hip-hop's top tier, with the rider passionately defending Pac's combination of impact, lyricism, and range. He points to the breadth from "California Love" to "Dear Mama" as proof. Kareem throws out Wayne, Biggie, and Drake. The rider counters with Playboy Carti and Kodak Black, names that clearly horrify Kareem, especially when the guy jokingly offers to spend a day with Kareem's daughter playing nothing but their music. "Not around my daughter," Kareem repeats. The bit ends with some racial humor that lands somewhere between playful and uncomfortable. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mdZ49Zwo6xM https://www.youtube.com/embed/mdZ49Zwo6xM 122 2026-03-05T17:48:23.000Z 724792 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/olivia-carter-subway-dancers-should-be-employed-by-the-mta-ft-olivia-carter 2026-04-15T06:35:11.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/i4yrSFx0aCc/maxresdefault.jpg Subway dancers should be employed by the MTA. Ft. Olivia Carter Olivia Carter thinks subway dancers should be on the MTA payroll. She's watched hardened men smile at their performances and believes they're the most talented thing to happen to a subway car. Kareem disagrees about safety. He's felt threatened by kicks coming dangerously close to his face. The conversation spirals into bean dipping (apparently jiggling someone's poop), salary negotiations where Olivia confuses three figures with six figures, and an impromptu dance attempt. She's not a numbers girl, she clarifies, she's a big ideas girl. Both agree the performers deserve fair wages and that showtime dancers are iconic to New York culture, even if Olivia initially suggests paying them $900 a year before correcting to $100,000. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=i4yrSFx0aCc https://www.youtube.com/embed/i4yrSFx0aCc 108 2026-03-04T18:00:58.000Z 301742 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/we-should-teach-self-defense-in-schools-instead-of-math 2026-04-15T06:35:16.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/vFkFz3aWLFk/maxresdefault.jpg We should teach self-defense in schools instead of math A black belt karate instructor argues math should be replaced with self-defense classes in schools. Calculators and AI have made math obsolete, she tells Kareem, but self-defense? That's essential for everything from walking home at night to dealing with HR. Her definition goes way beyond punches and kicks. It includes boundary setting, consent, knowing how to say no, and deescalating conflict. She even gets Kareem to let her demonstrate, claiming afterward "I punched the Subway Takes guy." Her three tips: take a beginner class in kickboxing or jiu-jitsu, expand your understanding beyond just physical defense, and remember that intervening when you witness violence is community self-defense. It's a radical reimagining of what protecting yourself actually means. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vFkFz3aWLFk https://www.youtube.com/embed/vFkFz3aWLFk 117 2026-03-03T18:01:04.000Z 182309 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/red-delicious-apples-are-actually-disgusting-ft-sterling-k-brown 2026-04-15T06:35:21.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/37uHhrflvms/maxresdefault.jpg Red delicious apples are actually disgusting. Ft. Sterling K. Brown Red Delicious apples are disgusting, mealy, and false advertising according to a rider who grew up in the '80s when school lunches offered little else. Kareem agrees. The conversation quickly pivots to apple superiority, with both declaring Honeycrisp the undisputed king. They bond over its crisp, tart perfection and how it's the apple Red Delicious should've been. Then things get weird: Kareem reveals he eats apple cores like a horse to avoid leftovers, and both admit to eating kiwi skin, which horrifies a bystander they poll on the train. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=37uHhrflvms https://www.youtube.com/embed/37uHhrflvms 98 2026-03-02T13:38:20.000Z 1448082 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/put-madam-cj-walker-on-the-20-bill-not-harriet-tubman 2026-04-15T06:35:27.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/6CFWGn4GHi0/maxresdefault.jpg Put Madam C.J. Walker on the $20 bill not Harriet Tubman A straphanger has a controversial take on the push to put Harriet Tubman on the $20 bill. She argues Madam C.J. Walker, the first self-made Black millionaire who built a hair product empire, deserves the honor instead because she represents money and the comeup better than someone who freed slaves. Her reasoning? "She looks mad and you should feel good about pulling money out your pocket." Kareem initially opts out of having an opinion on this one, but the rider's passionate argument about wanting to see a role model of financial freedom on currency eventually wins him over. The conversation gets delicate fast, balancing respect for Tubman's legacy with the desire for representation that feels aspirational rather than painful. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6CFWGn4GHi0 https://www.youtube.com/embed/6CFWGn4GHi0 99 2026-02-27T19:22:02.000Z 667982 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/for-every-1000-that-you-spend-you-should-be-slapped-in-the-face 2026-04-15T06:35:35.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/_e-bfajwoZo/maxresdefault.jpg For every $1,000 that you spend, you should be slapped in the face A wild take about slapping people in the face for every $1,000 they spend turns into a surprisingly thoughtful conversation about wealth inequality. Kareem and a subway rider quickly realize the premise only makes sense for the ultra-rich. They hash out the details: a $10 million net worth threshold, exemptions for charity, and plenty of slaps for Jeff Bezos's $600 million wedding to Lauren Sánchez. The math gets ridiculous fast. Bezos would face 28,000 slaps for that rumored $28 million Melania Trump documentary fee alone. They agree billionaires shouldn't exist, though the rider admits they'd happily take $5 million to make indie movies. It's half absurdist comedy, half earnest critique of obscene spending in a country where Gen Z can't afford homes and $6,000 studio apartments already feel like a slap in the face. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_e-bfajwoZo https://www.youtube.com/embed/_e-bfajwoZo 127 2026-02-25T18:00:45.000Z 382726 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/we-cant-try-and-get-rid-of-the-royal-family-ft-sophie-ducker 2026-04-15T06:35:40.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/4tXDzP9sMK0/maxresdefault.jpg We can't try and get rid of the royal family. Ft. Sophie Ducker A stranger on the train argues Britain should keep the royal family, but not out of respect. She calls them "embarrassing" nepo babies associated with scandal, from William's alleged infidelity (earning him the hashtag "prince of pegging") to Princess Anne's driving issues. Kareem pushes back. Why not guillotine them? Her take is refreshingly cynical: abolishing the monarchy now would be like deleting old problematic tweets. Better to let them publicly self-destruct. "We don't need to respect them, but we're not going to get rid of them," she explains, comparing it to letting evolution do its thing. They're the world's most famous landlords who can't control the headlines. She doesn't wish them ill. Just wants to watch them fall. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4tXDzP9sMK0 https://www.youtube.com/embed/4tXDzP9sMK0 121 2026-02-24T18:00:04.000Z 913798 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/dont-be-best-friends-with-your-neighbor 2026-04-15T06:35:46.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/scJilNoI1T0/maxresdefault.jpg Don't be best friends with your neighbor A straphanger offers some real estate wisdom: don't be best friends with your neighbors. Kareem agrees immediately. The logic is sound: you want to be nice, lend them sugar and milk, but avoid the complications that come with actual friendship. "You want a Goldilocks relationship with your neighbor," the rider explains. Too close and suddenly you're obligated to cat-sit or invite them to everything. But the conversation gets derailed when another subway rider starts filming their filming, leading to an awkward confrontation. The interloper struggles to articulate his own take when put on the spot, eventually landing on: this whole show is a problem on the subway. Classic New York moment. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=scJilNoI1T0 https://www.youtube.com/embed/scJilNoI1T0 181 2026-02-23T15:52:41.000Z 1532699 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/every-single-job-is-a-creative-job-aaronch3n 2026-04-15T06:35:52.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/U-pshV3LIro/maxresdefault.jpg Every single job is a creative job. @AaronCh3n A rider insists that every single job is a creative job, and Kareem pushes back. Doctor? The guy argues they creatively turn dead people into "live style" people, basically Frankenstein. Lawyer? Creating innocent people out of guilty ones. Pilots do flips. The only truly non-creative jobs, the rider claims, are demolition and assassin, since they're destructive rather than generative. But even then, he backtracks. Assassins are sneaky and clever, making fertilizer if you think about it. The least creative job? Podcast. He also questions why the Joe Rogan Experience is called an experience when it's just a conversation, then suggests Kareem should stop recording new takes and start implementing the backlog. Kareem wisely notes that not all takes should be put into action. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=U-pshV3LIro https://www.youtube.com/embed/U-pshV3LIro 117 2026-02-20T18:00:38.000Z 1017749 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/adults-should-support-teens-in-the-arts-ft-afhboston 2026-04-15T06:36:01.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/ihqtYqT6yoQ/maxresdefault.jpg Adults should support teens in the arts. Ft. @AFHBoston Miss Q taught a high school student to play cello in four years, getting them to professional all-city orchestra level. That's the kind of mentorship that matters. Kareem talks with a stranger who works at Artists For Humanity, a program that employs NYC teens to create commissioned artwork for businesses while getting paid real wages. Coming from an immigrant household where the pressure is "be a doctor, be a lawyer," not everyone has the luxury to explore the arts. AFH changes that. The rider argues adults need to support young artists with safe spaces and actual opportunities, not just empty encouragement. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ihqtYqT6yoQ https://www.youtube.com/embed/ihqtYqT6yoQ 101 2026-02-19T18:00:56.000Z 229293 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/if-youre-a-white-guy-that-likes-dating-asian-women-you-dont-gotta-do-that-anymor 2026-04-15T06:36:09.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/zwbBODhxno0/maxresdefault.jpg If you’re a white guy that likes dating Asian women, you don't gotta do that anymore A half-Asian straphanger delivers a spicy take: white guys have dated enough Asian women, and it's time to stop. He compares these couples to lantern flies "crawling up the trees" and "nesting in the East Village." His credentials? A Chinese mom and white dad who got together before internet porn made it weird. Kareem presses him on the Oxford study about Asian women's dating preferences and whether Asian women are complicit in the pattern. The passenger insists there needs to be a power dynamic, height difference, something. Then the punchline drops. His girlfriend? White. He claims it's all a joke, but also maintains the pattern is real and exhausting. The conversation spirals through interracial dating politics, fetishization, and self-awareness with the kind of chaotic energy that makes you unsure whether to laugh or cringe. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zwbBODhxno0 https://www.youtube.com/embed/zwbBODhxno0 110 2026-02-18T18:01:10.000Z 2004908 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/if-jesus-came-back-right-now-they-would-try-to-make-him-debate-25-nazis-on-jubil 2026-04-15T06:36:16.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/PeinFzqWnsw/maxresdefault.jpg if Jesus came back right now, they would try to make him debate 25 Nazis on Jubilee A rider brings the take that if Jesus returned today, "they would try to make him debate 25 Nazis on Jubilee." Kareem agrees. The conversation spirals into modern content culture: billionaires playing God, algorithms demanding rage bait, and the Messiah reduced to doing get-ready-with-me videos or posting thirst traps in his tunic to gain traction. The rider, who grew up religious and recently returned to church out of curiosity, admits the music got them emotional and jokes that "if I wasn't queer, I would definitely be homophobic too." They interpret the Bible in a progressive way. Would Jesus do Subway Takes? Absolutely. He'd use it to promote his Netflix special. His take? Horror movies are awesome. Too intense would be pancakes versus waffles. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PeinFzqWnsw https://www.youtube.com/embed/PeinFzqWnsw 112 2026-02-17T18:00:34.000Z 574973 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/you-should-only-be-allowed-to-have-a-dog-in-new-york-city-if-youre-gay 2026-04-15T06:36:23.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/B6aIOWjNgo4/maxresdefault.jpg You should only be allowed to have a dog in New York City if you're gay A subway rider drops a spicy opinion: only gay people should be allowed to have dogs in New York City. Kareem's intrigued but confused. The logic gets messier from there. The anonymous interviewee, who's currently tapering off Lexapro, argues that the city has too many dogs and that queer people are more empathetic pet owners anyway. They're bi, so "some would say that I can only have half a dog." When Kareem tries to work through the math of how many dogs this policy would actually eliminate (something about 4% of 50%), the conversation derails completely. "Dude, I've done far too many drugs in my 20s to follow this," the rider admits. The take's real point emerges: there are just too many damn dogs pooping everywhere in NYC, and the magic of dog ownership has lost its meaning when everyone treats it like a quirky personality trait instead of genuine emotional support. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=B6aIOWjNgo4 https://www.youtube.com/embed/B6aIOWjNgo4 121 2026-02-16T14:53:59.000Z 329783 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/ramy-youssef-i-dont-think-you-can-get-out-of-the-friendzone-ft-ramy-shafi 2026-04-15T06:36:29.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/svMEtuy_rLE/maxresdefault.jpg I don't think you can get out of the friendzone. Ft. Ramy Shafi Ramy Youssef doesn't think you can escape the friendzone, and Kareem's ready to back him up. Well, mostly. The comedian spins a yarn about "this one guy I know" named Gabe who tried to make his move after dinner, walking to the train, only to get the "let's stay friends" treatment. Kareem isn't buying it. He calls Ramy out, insisting the story's actually about him, not some mysterious Gabe. Ramy denies it. The back-and-forth gets playful as they debate whether friendship can ever turn romantic or if once you're in, you're stuck. It's Valentine's Day, and Ramy's plans involve calling his mom and watching movies with the homies. The friendzone might be inescapable, but at least it's honest. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=svMEtuy_rLE https://www.youtube.com/embed/svMEtuy_rLE 117 2026-02-14T18:00:53.000Z 549297 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/amelia-grey-more-men-should-wear-lip-gloss-ft-amelia-grey 2026-04-15T06:36:35.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/I60OSuaGe-U/maxresdefault.jpg More men should wear lip gloss. Ft. Amelia Grey​⁠ Amelia Grey thinks more men should wear lip gloss, and Kareem's about to get juiced up whether he likes it or not. The conversation starts with a mutual agreement that everyone deserves a juicy lip, which spirals into a discussion about "biscuit boys" with dry, crackery mouths. Grey doesn't hold back. When Kareem resists her makeover attempt, she wins him over by giving him his own tube and explaining how convenient it'd be if her boyfriend carried gloss too. The chat veers into purse territory, with Grey defending her messy bag contents (half cigarettes, chicken wings, the works) while Kareem learns he's not allowed to look inside a woman's purse without permission. By the end, he's glossed up and converted, cheersing his new shiny life. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=I60OSuaGe-U https://www.youtube.com/embed/I60OSuaGe-U 110 2026-02-13T18:52:06.000Z 528602 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/we-think-that-concerts-are-just-a-little-too-loud-raybullband 2026-04-15T06:36:41.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/yem3Y8Y9QXQ/maxresdefault.jpg We think that concerts are just a little too loud. @Raybullband A stranger on the subway has a bone to pick with the concert industry: the volume's cranked way too high. Kareem initially agrees, then wavers, but the riders bring him back with a killer analogy: "Giving out earplugs at a concert is like giving out sunglasses at a movie theater." They riff on Spinal Tap's amps going to 11 (when 9 would've been fine) and joke that maybe Freddie Mercury should've cranked it down instead of up in Bohemian Rhapsody. The conversation gets increasingly meta as they realize they're talking too loud themselves. By the end, they're whispering their take. Oh, and they ask about subway swipe reimbursement. The answer's no. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yem3Y8Y9QXQ https://www.youtube.com/embed/yem3Y8Y9QXQ 114 2026-02-12T18:01:09.000Z 792007 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/more-men-should-listen-to-romance-titles-audible-kierralewis 2026-04-15T06:36:48.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/YfOGU5oG6cw/maxresdefault.jpg More men should listen to romance titles. @audible @KierraLewis A woman on the subway has a blazing hot take: more men should listen to romance audiobooks to cure the male loneliness epidemic. Instead of turning to bro podcasts for dating advice, guys should hear what women actually want from romance titles written by women. Kareem's totally on board. The catch? She admits her own Audible habit has ruined her dating life. Her standards are sky-high now. She's not even dating anymore because real men can't compete with the fantasy guys in her earbuds. She defends herself though, insisting women have already lowered their standards and still get stuck with "50/50 guys" who are emotionally and financially half-committed. The conversation gets playful when Kareem imagines sitting on the train listening to "Heated Rivalry," blushing while everyone assumes he's tuned into some comedy podcast. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YfOGU5oG6cw https://www.youtube.com/embed/YfOGU5oG6cw 131 2026-02-11T18:09:22.000Z 447454 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/if-you-know-you-come-from-a-crazy-family-normalize-not-having-to-introduce-your 2026-04-15T06:36:54.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/d4x_BuImu8w/maxresdefault.jpg If you know you come from a crazy family, normalize not having to introduce your partners to them A rider admits his family is "on the spectrum" and sparks a debate about whether you're obligated to introduce romantic partners to truly unhinged relatives. His aunt gets possessed by the Holy Spirit at Red Lobster, not church. One cousin hijacked his mom's funeral to deliver an antivax rant. Another volunteers as an auxiliary police officer, showing up in uniform with no pay and mysterious income. Kareem counters that people want to meet the kooky uncle, but the rider insists they'll hold it against you, convinced you've got "that gene." He's dated into weird families too. A girlfriend's grandpa once asked if he grew up wearing shoes in Minnesota, earnest racism that was somehow funny. The take holds: if your uncle doesn't believe in dinosaurs or money, maybe skip the family dinner. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=d4x_BuImu8w https://www.youtube.com/embed/d4x_BuImu8w 124 2026-02-10T17:45:59.000Z 1294317 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/veronika-slowikowska-im-having-a-panic-attack-ft-veronika-slowikowska 2026-04-15T06:36:59.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/l7L1nnjCHp4/maxresdefault.jpg I'm having a panic attack. Ft. Veronika Slowikowska Veronika Slowikowska arrives visibly anxious, struggling to deliver her take on camera. She cycles through attempts: bonus features on DVDs were never properly mourned as the greatest loss from physical media, then a suggestion to skip your friend's wedding even if you've already RSVP'd because "you're tired and you deserve to rest." The nerves escalate. Kareem tries coaching her through it, offering cue cards and encouragement, but Veronika eventually announces she's having a panic attack. The segment devolves into chaos with mounting tension, awkward moments, and what appears to be something gross happening that rattles both of them. It's raw, uncomfortable, and completely unscripted. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=l7L1nnjCHp4 https://www.youtube.com/embed/l7L1nnjCHp4 132 2026-02-09T18:00:52.000Z 635489 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/myhala-herrold-i-think-we-need-to-bring-back-booing-ft-myhala 2026-04-15T06:37:08.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/rWURWvK5xqk/maxresdefault.jpg I think we need to bring back booing. Ft. Myhala Myhala Herrold wants everyone to start booing again. Not random booing, she clarifies to Kareem, but as a critical response to art that deserves it. Film festivals, movie theaters, performance art. Right now people just sit through bad work and then praise things that should've been booed. The problem? Nobody wants to be that guy doing it alone. Myhala admits she wants collective booing so she feels comfortable joining in, since her solo boos aren't loud enough. They practice different booing styles, from scary ghost boos to "Boo, you stink" variations. When Kareem asks if birthdays should be exempt from booing, Myhala shoots him down immediately. He questions his own interjection, she boos him for it, and he admits it felt good. Point proven. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rWURWvK5xqk https://www.youtube.com/embed/rWURWvK5xqk 114 2026-02-06T18:01:08.000Z 349187 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/old-dudes-who-date-younger-women-should-have-to-act-their-girlfriends-age-ssalma 2026-04-15T06:37:16.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/WM3sotN_KDo/maxresdefault.jpg Old dudes who date younger women should have to act their girlfriend's age. @s@salmazaky A straphanger has a provocative proposal: old dudes dating significantly younger women should have to live like their girlfriend's age. That means no more mansions. You're getting four roommates in Bushwick now. No healthcare, no credit score, and you're working as a barista. Kareem loves it. They spiral into the specifics: stick-and-poke tattoos, TikTok dances, baggy clothes that don't fit, electronic music with no instruments. If you're a 55-year-old guy in the West Village dating a 23-year-old, you're moving to Bushwick and doing Molly at Mood Ring. The rider thinks most guys would actually do it. She grants one exemption: Leo DiCaprio. But Kareem pushes back. No more yacht, Leo. You're in a bunk bed now. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WM3sotN_KDo https://www.youtube.com/embed/WM3sotN_KDo 118 2026-02-05T18:43:45.000Z 886341 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/people-should-not-be-allowed-to-comment-on-videos-unless-theyve-watched-the-enti 2026-04-15T06:37:21.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/3Z4k7ynI_JQ/maxresdefault.jpg People should not be allowed to comment on videos unless they've watched the entire thing A straphanger has a bold proposal: platforms shouldn't let you comment on videos unless you've watched the whole thing. She tells Kareem that people keep asking questions already answered later in the video, which is just lazy. The conversation spirals into sheep versus wolves, independent thinking versus following the herd, and whether shepherds are conformists. It gets biblical. Then she adds another rule: no sending videos to the group chat unless you've actually watched them first, because she values proper conversation over engagement. They decide to test her theory by planting a code word at the end, "karma," so viewers can prove they made it through. She promises to respond to everyone who comments it. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3Z4k7ynI_JQ https://www.youtube.com/embed/3Z4k7ynI_JQ 93 2026-02-04T15:43:44.000Z 449841 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/coryn-rose-all-entertainment-tickets-should-be-on-a-sliding-scale-ft-coryn-rose 2026-04-15T06:37:27.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/inNVb8tJA_k/maxresdefault.jpg All entertainment tickets should be on a sliding scale. Ft. Coryn Rose Coryn Rose comes in hot with a sliding scale proposal for all entertainment tickets, and Kareem's immediately on board. The conversation spirals from the "bread and roses" labor movement philosophy to Rose's truly scorching take that no ticket should cost over $50. Her logic? Lower prices mean longer runs, sold-out shows every night, and artists actually working more instead of chasing quick cash from half-empty theaters charging $800 a pop. They get into implementation details, noting that Amazon and Walmart already use algorithms to adjust grocery prices based on what you earn. Wild. Rose also wants to eliminate all service fees and ticket taxes while opening museums late. Kareem snorts with laughter but agrees completely. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=inNVb8tJA_k https://www.youtube.com/embed/inNVb8tJA_k 129 2026-02-03T18:00:48.000Z 632115 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/derek-gaines-they-should-have-a-tourism-lane-on-the-sidewalk-like-the-street-has-a-bike-lane 2026-04-15T06:37:34.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/Th12tPRHX5s/maxresdefault.jpg They should have a tourism lane on the sidewalk like the street has a bike lane. ​ft. Derek Gaines Derek Gaines has a solution for New York's sidewalk chaos: a tourism lane, just like the bike lane in the street. He's tired of people staring at their phones or gawking at the Macy's lights while he's trying to get to work. What follows is a masterclass in what Gaines calls "social terrorism," the kind that doesn't hurt anyone but frays everyone's nerves. Showtime dancers? Social terrorism. Clipping nails on the train? Social terrorism. Someone blasting their cousin's mixtape on a JBL speaker or eating a tuna sandwich underground? You guessed it. Kareem loves the idea so much they riff on extending it to airlines, where crying babies get their own designated plane. The conversation spirals into increasingly specific complaints about city living, from hippie parents with baby-backpacks to speakerphone conversations about Tropicana juice. Pure New York frustration, channeled perfectly. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Th12tPRHX5s https://www.youtube.com/embed/Th12tPRHX5s 127 2026-02-02T18:48:50.000Z 716802 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/cherian-dabis-if-the-us-is-bombing-your-homeland-you-shouldnt-have-to-pay-taxes-ft-cherien-dab 2026-04-15T06:37:41.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/ao94M0lXBIY/maxresdefault.jpg If the U.S. is bombing your homeland, you shouldn't have to pay taxes. Ft Cherien Dabis Cherian Dabis drops a provocative tax policy proposal: if the U.S. is bombing or funding the bombing of your homeland, you shouldn't have to pay taxes. She calls it "double billing" when people have to fund attacks on their own countries. Kareem agrees enthusiastically. The conversation spirals into what could happen if Americans could choose where their tax dollars go during filing season. Dabis rattles off a list: Palestine, Venezuela, Syria. She's confident the government would lose "a lot of revenue" if immigrants from bombed countries got exemptions. Both imagine a checkbox system where taxpayers opt out of war spending entirely, directing money toward education and healthcare instead. "That would be real democracy," Dabis argues, betting most Americans would check "no war." The take is absurd on its face but lands with genuine frustration. Peace. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ao94M0lXBIY https://www.youtube.com/embed/ao94M0lXBIY 116 2026-01-31T15:45:06.000Z 351287 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/you-gotta-curse-out-anyone-that-wrongs-you 2026-04-15T06:37:47.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/CSnC-E7mQ28/maxresdefault.jpg You gotta curse out anyone that wrongs you A straphanger has a bold philosophy: "You gotta curse out anyone that wrongs you." She explains it's about accountability, not random aggression. When someone does you wrong, whether a friend or a stranger who bumps into you, immediate correction is part of living in community. She's yelled at her parents. She's cursed people out and been cursed out herself, and she's always been better for it. There's one exception she regrets: her ex Steven, who wronged her but never got the verbal lashing he deserved. Kareem immediately crowdsources justice. "If you know Steven, tag him in the comments." They'll all curse him out together. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CSnC-E7mQ28 https://www.youtube.com/embed/CSnC-E7mQ28 118 2026-01-29T18:00:11.000Z 210129 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/adam-pally-we-need-to-change-the-attitudes-that-we-have-about-parking-spots-ft-adam-pally 2026-04-15T06:37:52.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/kj1CZJTQpZo/maxresdefault.jpg We need to change the attitudes that we have about parking spots. Ft. Adam Pally Adam Pally wants to change how people react when you ask if they're leaving a parking spot. Instead of a friendly "no, sorry," New Yorkers always respond like "No, no, NO, NO, NO," as if you've personally offended them by asking a reasonable question. Kareem pushes back hard, claiming people are actually nice to him at food trucks and parking spots. Pally thinks that's ridiculous. The conversation spirals into a debate about New York attitude versus Minnesota niceness, with Pally getting increasingly flustered about whether his take even matters when "people are being shot in the face." He stands by it anyway. Kareem diagnoses the real problem: his boy's got a chip on his shoulder. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kj1CZJTQpZo https://www.youtube.com/embed/kj1CZJTQpZo 131 2026-01-28T18:00:55.000Z 730809 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/cats-are-better-than-dogs-iianfidancecomedynyc 2026-04-15T06:38:00.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/zgMf9492apY/maxresdefault.jpg Cats are better than dogs. @I@IanFidanceComedynyc A passionate cat lover launches into an unhinged defense of felines over canines, arguing that cats teach "patience, love, respect, consent" while dogs are basically fascist collaborators. The rider shows off photos of their cats Samson, Glenn, Kremlin, and Mo, though Kareem catches them including a picture of their daughter. The rant gets wildly specific: golden doodles named Taco should be renamed Helen, loyal friends are overrated compared to honest ones, and cats are "like edging but with love." They poll nearby riders. The political angle escalates. Dogs work for ICE, sniff bombs for the feds, and tackle people. Cats? Just nice. The closer argues that fake service animals are a scourge and that if horses have to work, they deserve wages. It's chaotic, profane, and somehow makes a case that loving cats is an act of resistance. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zgMf9492apY https://www.youtube.com/embed/zgMf9492apY 152 2026-01-27T18:00:59.000Z 660036 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/if-youre-a-born-and-raised-new-yorker-you-should-get-special-perks 2026-04-15T06:38:07.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/_n-epl6PcNA/maxresdefault.jpg If you're a born and raised New Yorker, you should get special perks A born and raised New Yorker argues she deserves special perks: no waiting in line at TikTokified cafes, restaurant fees waived, and treatment "like a princess." Kareem's skeptical. "There's 8 million people here," he points out, questioning what makes being a native so special. She's adamant that only people born in the city qualify, not transplants, though she's willing to make an exception if they have a kid born here. Another rider backs her princess status briefly. The conversation ping-pongs wildly as Kareem keeps changing his mind, at one point suggesting he'd prefer if the perks applied only to her specifically. She revokes his New Yorker privileges entirely when he dismisses the specialness of being from here. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_n-epl6PcNA https://www.youtube.com/embed/_n-epl6PcNA 121 2026-01-26T18:00:45.000Z 321531 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/we-need-to-normalize-adults-taking-more-naps-every-day-wwatchingnewyork 2026-04-15T06:38:13.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/csdGFBi8nd0/maxresdefault.jpg We need to normalize adults taking more naps every day. @w@watchingnewyork A passenger makes the case for daily naps, and Kareem's all in. The straphanger reveals he's been napping continuously since childhood, never taking a break between baby naps and adult naps, despite social stigma. His secret? Ten minutes exactly. Any longer and you wake up on another planet, but that sweet spot gives you two days in one. The conversation touches on renewable energy (the free kind, not caffeine), siesta culture, and why pretending to sleep doesn't count. Kareem used to be anti-nap but fatherhood changed him. They agree the world needs more rest, not more people zombified at their computers. The episode ends with the two testing out a homie napping position right there on the subway. Just a little snooze. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=csdGFBi8nd0 https://www.youtube.com/embed/csdGFBi8nd0 117 2026-01-25T18:00:41.000Z 285745 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/companies-should-allocate-two-days-a-month-for-women-to-have-period-leave 2026-04-15T06:38:19.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/b-0blrEPi_c/maxresdefault.jpg Companies Should allocate two days a month for women to have period leave A straphanger makes her pitch for mandatory period leave: two days a month, codified by law, to deal with cramps, nausea, and what she calls "a Charlie horse in my uterus." Kareem's immediately sold. The reasoning's straightforward: periods bring the same symptoms as a cold or flu, so why burn sick days on something that happens every month like clockwork? She's thought through the rollout. If some women don't need it, fine, don't use it. But for those who do, it should be right there alongside maternity and paternity leave. They joke about calling Elizabeth Warren to make it a national bill. The period bill. Started here, on Subway Takes, with Brianna Holt's DMs open for questions. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=b-0blrEPi_c https://www.youtube.com/embed/b-0blrEPi_c 91 2026-01-25T16:28:20.000Z 573194 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/the-best-advice-is-dont-listen-to-advice-just-figure-it-out-for-yourself-aameric 2026-04-15T06:38:25.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/Tuki_bob9mo/maxresdefault.jpg The best advice is don't listen to advice, just figure it out for yourself. @a@americanbaron A straphanger drops a paradox on Kareem: "The best advice is don't listen to advice, just figure it out for yourself." They riff on advice inflation, snake oil gurus selling success formulas, and the magic lost when you let the internet do your thinking. The conversation pivots hard when they debate failing publicly versus privately. Kareem thinks you should "progress your way to failing in public," but his conversation partner argues the opposite, saying we'd all be more open to failure if we saw successful people's earlier flops. "The road is paved with L's," they conclude. The L stands for losses. And love. It's a meta take that doesn't quite work but kind of does, landing somewhere between self-help satire and genuine wisdom about trusting your gut in an era of information overload. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Tuki_bob9mo https://www.youtube.com/embed/Tuki_bob9mo 117 2026-01-23T18:00:35.000Z 449299 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/summer-is-the-worst-season-alexandrarobinson 2026-04-15T06:38:31.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/tNrUlGoX0H4/maxresdefault.jpg Summer is the worst season. @AlexandraRobinson A straphanger makes the contrarian case that summer is actually the worst season, and her secret weapon is soup. The entire food group goes out of commission for three months, she argues to Kareem, while fall, spring, and even winter allow for proper cozy vibes. She's obsessed with hygge, that Scandinavian concept of warmth and coziness that helps make those countries the happiest in the world. The debate gets heated. Kareem pushes back hard on the idea that winter beats summer, but she's got receipts: fashion's better in colder months, New York City summers are miserable, and she'd rather cozy up to a metal radiator than a plastic AC unit. There's one caveat to her take. Summer '16 was different. They both remember it fondly, though the transcript cuts off before we learn why that particular summer earned an exception. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tNrUlGoX0H4 https://www.youtube.com/embed/tNrUlGoX0H4 115 2026-01-22T18:00:58.000Z 776982 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/all-sauce-should-come-on-the-side-mmarcello 2026-04-15T06:38:39.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/BLK2Nbl-YNo/maxresdefault.jpg All sauce should come on the side. @M@Marcello A passionate stranger takes a firm stand: all sauce should come on the side at restaurants. His reasoning? The chef doesn't know how much sauce you want or deserve, so they should at least ask, just like they ask how you want your meat cooked. Kareem pushes back hard, challenging him on pasta with red sauce and signature sandwiches where the house sauce defines the whole dish. The rider keeps contradicting himself, saying chefs should "let me cook" with sauce choices but also "you got to let the chef cook" when it comes to signature items. The debate gets messy fast. He admits he only wants sauce on the side when he's unsure about it, which Kareem calls "embarrassing." But the argument that finally lands? Dipping versus pouring. That's a choice you get to make, and suddenly Kareem's convinced. Freedom of choice wins the day. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BLK2Nbl-YNo https://www.youtube.com/embed/BLK2Nbl-YNo 119 2026-01-21T18:00:10.000Z 4233451 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/we-need-a-birth-control-for-men-and-people-who-produce-sperm 2026-04-15T06:38:44.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/go00nWWfMew/maxresdefault.jpg We need a birth control for men and people who produce sperm A straphanger makes the case that male birth control already exists and has been successfully trialled for years, it's just not on shelves because society hasn't caught up. Kareem agrees. The conversation turns to a vivid analogy: trying to prevent pregnancy with female birth control is like sitting under a leaking ceiling with an umbrella that gives you side effects, when you could just fix the leak at the source. The rider argues male birth control is actually more effective than current female methods, and the male body is less complicated to work with. They joke about marketing strategies. Call it Sperm Blaster, maybe. Get Nick Cannon to be the spokesperson. "Nick Cannon presents Funcom. Come all you want. It's just for fun. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=go00nWWfMew https://www.youtube.com/embed/go00nWWfMew 137 2026-01-20T18:00:49.000Z 434107 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/as-a-society-we-need-to-put-an-end-to-the-use-of-balloons 2026-04-15T06:38:50.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/d8QwtPRvfXA/maxresdefault.jpg As a society, we need to put an end to the use of balloons A traumatic childhood balloon accident has left one passenger with a lifelong vendetta against latex and foil. "I was 5 years old," he tells Kareem, recounting the moment a balloon popped on his face and his mother had to peel it off. Now a father himself, he's calling for society to end balloon use entirely. His reasoning? We banned straws after one turtle video, yet we're still wasting precious helium on party decorations that end up in the ocean. Kareem, who admits he's got three foil balloons at home with his daughter, pushes back. What about balloon artists? Nope. The dad's anti-balloon stance is absolute, even as he confesses that hating balloons makes him feel like a less-than-great parent. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=d8QwtPRvfXA https://www.youtube.com/embed/d8QwtPRvfXA 110 2026-01-19T18:00:49.000Z 453838 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/ronnie-chieng-no-one-is-in-control-of-their-own-thoughts-ft-ronnie-sophie 2026-04-15T06:39:03.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/cQWyJC1cONg/maxresdefault.jpg No one is in control of their own thoughts. Ft. Ronnie & Sophie Ronnie Chieng and Sophie debate whether anyone controls their own thoughts, with Sophie insisting that intrusive thoughts run the show. She admits to thinking "Kareem, you look sexier in person" without meaning to. The conversation veers into Instagram algorithms eating their brain space. Sophie, who describes herself as a professional influencer and interior designer, explains how the app serves up embarrassing content like plastic surgery and leg-lengthening procedure videos that she can't stop watching. Her assistant chimes in with agreement. The pair ham it up for the camera, flirting with Kareem while Sophie pretends to take a business call and complains she needs more followers. It's chaotic, self-aware, and very online. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cQWyJC1cONg https://www.youtube.com/embed/cQWyJC1cONg 131 2026-01-16T18:00:46.000Z 430715 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/scarr-pimentel-the-restaurant-industry-in-new-york-is-mid-and-super-overrated-ft-scarr-pimental 2026-04-15T06:39:10.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/WalboYXUyjU/maxresdefault.jpg The restaurant industry in New York is mid and super overrated. Ft. Scarr Pimental Scarr Pimentel, owner of Scarr's Pizza, thinks New York's restaurant scene is mid and overrated. His reason? The industry's been taken over by VC and private equity money in the last six or seven years. He tells Kareem how to spot a venture-backed restaurant: if the Instagram looks too polished, if they've got merch ready before they even open, if TikTok influencers show up on day one. That's VC. Meanwhile, small business owners like Pimentel face brutal red tape, endless fines, and zero tax breaks while Starbucks and McDonald's get corporate handouts. He's been open almost ten years and still doesn't know how he's survived. His advice for aspiring restaurateurs? Hope your family's rich, or just open in Minnesota instead, make your money there, and come back when you're loaded. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WalboYXUyjU https://www.youtube.com/embed/WalboYXUyjU 118 2026-01-15T23:56:31.000Z 935447 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/caroline-montesquieu-i-like-that-our-phones-are-listening-to-us-ft-caroline-montesquieu 2026-04-15T06:39:15.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/cqP6BrGbaY4/maxresdefault.jpg I like that our phones are listening to us. Ft Caroline Montesquieu Caroline Montesquieu has made peace with the surveillance state, and she's getting coupons out of it. She tells Kareem she genuinely likes that phones are listening to us because it's already happening whether we accept it or not. Her evidence? She wrote "Prada perfume" in her notes and boom, Instagram served her a 20% discount. Caroline has three Alexas at home and hits "allow" on every tracking request, especially on Uber Eats. She doesn't care if "some random guy in China has like a picture of my butthole." The algorithm works. It even brought her and Bad Bunny together when he reposted her thirsty video. When Kareem pushes back about government overreach, Caroline shrugs it off. We don't have a choice, so why not vibe out and enjoy the discounts? https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cqP6BrGbaY4 https://www.youtube.com/embed/cqP6BrGbaY4 121 2026-01-14T18:00:47.000Z 497873 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/if-youre-stagnant-in-your-life-you-have-two-choices-you-can-either-change-or-die 2026-04-15T06:39:21.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/XqzRTJl_NtU/maxresdefault.jpg If you're stagnant in your life, you have two choices, you can either change or die A straphanger delivers a confrontational pep talk about stagnation: you can either change or die. Kareem pushes back hard, twisting the take into a pro-change stance while the rider doubles down with surprising intensity. The conversation spirals from depression and self-care to Sisyphus, sad sacks who sit on the rock making it harder for everyone else, and an oddly specific prescription for heartbroken men (volunteer for a month, then "bitches will literally fall on you"). It's part philosophy lecture, part tough love intervention. The rider, who's on antidepressants and comfortable discussing it, insists there's no room for endless wallowing in sadness, especially for internet-dwelling men who blame women for their problems. Kareem tries to defend the right to heartbreak. The whole thing ends abruptly. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XqzRTJl_NtU https://www.youtube.com/embed/XqzRTJl_NtU 131 2026-01-13T18:00:43.000Z 320074 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/if-you-have-a-cough-just-call-in-sick 2026-04-15T06:39:28.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/Sq4tqg_IK_g/maxresdefault.jpg If you have a cough, just call in sick A straphanger shares a simple public health take: if you have a cough, just call in sick. Kareem agrees wholeheartedly, arguing that nobody wants you at work anyway and "we all know that you do nothing at your job." The conversation touches on creative directors, mood boards, and the agony of sitting through a 70mm screening of The Great Escape while someone hacks away behind you. Then the guest starts coughing. Repeatedly. Kareem's not amused. He points out the irony immediately, asking why they didn't follow their own advice and stay home. The guest insists it's just lingering holiday germs and they're fine, but Kareem's patience wears thin fast. "If you cough one more time, I'm out." The whole thing devolves into awkward territory as the cameras keep rolling and Kareem wonders aloud whether he'll even post the episode. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Sq4tqg_IK_g https://www.youtube.com/embed/Sq4tqg_IK_g 111 2026-01-12T19:24:47.000Z 305128 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/we-need-a-reality-tv-show-that-follows-deadbeat-dads-ttalibbabb 2026-04-15T06:39:35.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/zJ9hfh-GOl4/maxresdefault.jpg We need a reality TV show that follows deadbeat dads. @T@TalibBabb A straphanger pitches Kareem on a reality show concept that's equal parts absurd and weirdly compelling: follow deadbeat dads around New York City to see what they're doing instead of raising their kids. The theory? They must be up to something incredibly cool, like getting a pilot's license or winning a Grammy. Probably not though. They're likely just playing video games. The pair workshops the entire premise on the spot, settling on "Real Deadbeat Dads of New York City" as the title and imagining intervention episodes where families reconnect. The kicker: they figure a deadbeat would rejoin his family for 20K. Kareem offers a 55/45 split on their "shared intellectual property." It's a Bravo show, obviously. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zJ9hfh-GOl4 https://www.youtube.com/embed/zJ9hfh-GOl4 116 2026-01-11T18:01:11.000Z 955960 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/mario-lopez-stop-asking-peoplehow-are-you-because-nobody-gives-a-f-ft-marito-lopez 2026-04-15T06:39:40.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/VfyJvDdF6f4/maxresdefault.jpg Stop asking people"How are you?" because nobody gives a f***. Ft. Marito Lopez Mario Lopez brings a spicy take about ditching "How are you?" as a greeting because nobody actually cares about the answer. Kareem pushes back, arguing he genuinely wants to know, but Lopez isn't having it. The conversation spirals into Latino greetings ("qué" means love, not small talk), the transactional nature of cashier pleasantries, and why Lopez refuses to tell his mom how he's really doing in New York City because "I'm scared, Mommy" isn't the vibe. Lopez's alternative? "What up, king?" followed by a hug and walking away. No questions asked. The irony hits when Kareem, after thanking him for coming on, can't help but ask "How are you, though? For real?" Lopez's response: "I'm all right. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VfyJvDdF6f4 https://www.youtube.com/embed/VfyJvDdF6f4 113 2026-01-10T21:53:44.000Z 888381 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/when-people-who-have-destination-weddings-get-divorced-they-should-reimburse 2026-04-15T06:39:46.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/OehncKyB8VA/maxresdefault.jpg When people who have destination weddings get divorced they should reimburse A straphanger drops a spicy take: if you throw a destination wedding and later divorce, you should reimburse your guests for their travel costs. She's talking $4,000 flights to Mexico, credit card debt, outfits, plus gifts on top of everything else. Kareem agrees wholeheartedly. The conversation spirals into complaints about Instagram-inflated weddings, the awkwardness of only knowing one person at a ceremony, and yes, the carbon footprint of flying everyone to the same tropical location. The rider was born out of wedlock and calls herself a bastard, explaining her parents stayed together nearly 50 years without marriage. Plot twist: she reveals she's planning her own destination wedding in Egypt. Egypt Air gets a shoutout. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OehncKyB8VA https://www.youtube.com/embed/OehncKyB8VA 95 2026-01-09T18:00:29.000Z 541138 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/new-york-fitness-culture-is-a-scam-onikacomedy 2026-04-15T06:39:51.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/msqGJyae_HY/maxresdefault.jpg New York fitness culture is a scam. @onikacomedy A straphanger tears into New York's fitness scene, arguing nobody actually works out anymore. She tells Kareem that gym-goers are just there for content creation and dating, claiming she joined an expensive gym to find a rich guy but only met old pickleball players and other Black women with the same plan. Now they go to brunch together. She insists personal trainers are a scam and a relationship red flag. If your partner says they're getting a trainer, they're leaving you. The rant extends to running clubs, which she dismisses as desperate friend-seeking. Her advice? Go to a bar like people used to. She greets strangers on the train all the time. Their response is usually "What the fuck is wrong with you? https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=msqGJyae_HY https://www.youtube.com/embed/msqGJyae_HY 115 2026-01-08T18:30:32.000Z 2741485 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/kids-and-dogs-should-not-be-allowed-at-the-pub 2026-04-15T06:39:57.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/IAKFYowxWk8/maxresdefault.jpg Kids and dogs should not be allowed at the pub A straphanger who stepped on a dog's tail at a pub thinks kids and dogs shouldn't be allowed in bars. The concern? If you accidentally hurt someone's child or pet in a crowded space, it becomes your fault even though they shouldn't have been there in the first place. Kareem pushes back on the safety angle, suggesting it's really about vibes. The rider reluctantly empathizes with parents wanting to grab a pint without paying for a babysitter, but draws the line at big dogs. They do agree on one exception: a pub with 50 cats would be nice. The conversation meanders through London's pitbull ban and whether 10-year-olds are pub-appropriate, landing on the conclusion that cats are more agile anyway. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IAKFYowxWk8 https://www.youtube.com/embed/IAKFYowxWk8 105 2026-01-07T18:00:31.000Z 259685 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/if-i-was-an-athlete-i-would-wanna-be-able-to-opt-out-of-being-bet-on-ft-neko-whi 2026-04-15T06:40:06.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/LoJy5wZABXQ/maxresdefault.jpg If I was an athlete, I would wanna be able to opt out of being bet on. Ft. Neko White A straphanger delivers a scorching take on sports betting apps: if he were an athlete, he'd want to opt out of being bet on entirely. The logic is dark but simple. When someone loses money on your performance, things can get dangerous fast. "It's one thing if I watch the game and it's like you lose. It's another thing when yo, I bet my money, my kids money, I bet my taxes on you having the over of 15 and you had 14." Kareem agrees the gambling saturation has gotten out of hand, with every commercial break cycling between betting promos and helpline numbers. The conversation shifts to a wilder complaint: white people need to stop bothering Black people with information nobody asked for, like Cracker Barrel's logo redesign or Liam Neeson's racist comments. His mom called it "Leon Nelson" and the movie "Take Me Away." Kareem pushes back. Black people aren't a monolith. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LoJy5wZABXQ https://www.youtube.com/embed/LoJy5wZABXQ 140 2026-01-06T17:00:39.000Z 1817179 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/no-more-celebrities-jjenbristercomedy 2026-04-15T04:38:35.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/UjrnUNWwOV8/maxresdefault.jpg No more celebrities. @J@JenBristerComedy Comedian Jen Brister brings her hot take: we need to stop obsessing over celebrities. She argues that celebrity culture has gotten out of hand and society would be better off focusing on regular people doing interesting things instead of worshipping famous faces. It's a refreshingly grounded perspective from someone who's actually in the entertainment industry. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UjrnUNWwOV8 https://www.youtube.com/embed/UjrnUNWwOV8 100 2026-01-05T17:01:01.000Z 461829 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/our-phones-should-never-ever-make-this-sound 2026-04-15T06:40:11.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/dZ7xVlm-JHQ/maxresdefault.jpg Our phones should never, ever make this sound A straphanger thinks emergency alerts should only make that terrifying sound for one thing: incoming ballistic missiles. She's fed up with Amber Alerts and Silver Alerts using the same alarm as nuclear annihilation, suggesting different sounds for different threat levels. Maybe something casual for a missing person at a Target 300 miles away. Kareem compares it to how the New York Times delivers war headlines. The conversation spirals into a larger conspiracy theory about alerts breadcrumbing us into the Purge, Finnish people drinking by noon despite claiming to be the world's happiest country, and whether Norway would be a good place to hide during a global catastrophe. It wouldn't. They're sociopaths too. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dZ7xVlm-JHQ https://www.youtube.com/embed/dZ7xVlm-JHQ 124 2026-01-04T17:01:04.000Z 1284273 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/the-discourse-in-the-usa-concerning-landlords-i-would-certainly-describe-as-rath 2026-04-15T06:40:16.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/3MdkVmAihkM/maxresdefault.jpg The discourse in the USA concerning landlords, I would certainly describe as rather Neolithic A rider with a posh British accent unleashes a wildly unpopular take: America's discourse on landlords is "rather Neolithic," and renters should be more grateful. He insists landlords provide an essential service, offering protection and safety like a miniature kingdom. In the UK, he claims, people even tip their landlords. Kareem pushes back, pointing out the obvious. The rent is too high. The stranger doubles down, arguing that tenants choose to rent instead of living in parks or on subway platforms, so they should appreciate what they're getting. It's a spectacularly tone-deaf argument. Kareem flatly disagrees. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3MdkVmAihkM https://www.youtube.com/embed/3MdkVmAihkM 88 2026-01-03T17:00:04.000Z 472547 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/people-should-say-i-love-you-more 2026-04-15T06:40:22.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/rxvSImZgIrU/maxresdefault.jpg People should say "I love you" more A rider shares her take that people should say "I love you" more, then takes it to the extreme: why not tell your one night stand you love them? Kareem pushes back hard. He's married. But she insists it feels great to hear and say, whether it's to a taxi driver who didn't brake too hard or someone you just met. She even gets Kareem to say it on camera, though he deflects when pressed to say it back. The conversation spirals into whether New York hookups deserve declarations of love and whether DMs from strangers count as proof. She argues that dopamine hits both ways and people genuinely want to feel loved. Kareem agrees the sentiment is beautiful but draws the line at casual intimacy requiring those three words. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rxvSImZgIrU https://www.youtube.com/embed/rxvSImZgIrU 115 2026-01-01T18:01:03.000Z 539301 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/reading-is-overrated 2026-04-15T04:38:50.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/fX8GjKrdePA/maxresdefault.jpg Reading is overrated The host talks to a passenger who thinks reading is totally overrated, which is definitely a spicy take. They apparently get into why books aren't as important as people make them out to be, possibly touching on how food and social media fit into modern life. The conversation challenges the whole "readers are leaders" mentality. Wild position to defend on camera. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fX8GjKrdePA https://www.youtube.com/embed/fX8GjKrdePA 143 2025-12-31T18:00:51.000Z 554666 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/if-you-are-in-a-relationship-stay-out-of-restaurants 2026-04-15T06:40:28.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/kRnBq0SfO_w/maxresdefault.jpg If you are in a relationship, stay out of restaurants A restaurant server has a wild demand: couples need to stay out of restaurants and leave the tables for single diners. Why? Because servers are "dying to just flirt with someone," and couples ruin the vibe. Kareem tries to negotiate. What about bringing a third wheel? The server agrees, but only if you bring two single people who are brothers, one gay and one straight. She describes the ultimate betrayal: flirting with a cute single guy all night, only for him to order "11 ice box 5 to go for my fiancé" at dessert. "He might as well take out a gun and shot you." The conversation takes a turn when an older couple reveals they've been married 52 years and are headed to dinner right now. Their son? A single gay server. Romance ensues. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kRnBq0SfO_w https://www.youtube.com/embed/kRnBq0SfO_w 103 2025-12-30T18:00:51.000Z 2063502 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/people-who-say-that-london-is-a-no-go-zone-either-dont-live-there-or-are-just-st 2026-04-15T06:40:33.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/-ZxPpsqO1zE/maxresdefault.jpg People who say that London is a no go zone either don't live there or are just straight up racist A Londoner on the train defends his city against claims it's a "no-go zone," arguing that critics are either disconnected or racist. He tells Kareem that London, like New York, proves multiculturalism doesn't just work but thrives. The conversation gets playful when Kareem misunderstands British slang, "flag shaggers" becomes "flag" and there's a dark joke about the word "nons." They discuss London's progressive politics, with the rider praising Mayor Sadiq Khan as "the most overhated person in the world" who faces criticism because "his surname is Khan." He's optimistic about the city's future. The takeaway? "Big up London. Big up New York. Greatest cities in the world. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-ZxPpsqO1zE https://www.youtube.com/embed/-ZxPpsqO1zE 116 2025-12-29T18:00:01.000Z 603992 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/bring-back-video-rental-stores 2026-04-15T06:40:40.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/jLxpk-5SPps/maxresdefault.jpg Bring back video rental stores A straphanger makes the case for bringing back video rental stores, and it's not about nostalgia. Well, not entirely. They're tired of scrolling endlessly through streaming options every night, wasting tens of minutes only to abandon their choice within two minutes and retreat to Gilmore Girls season three. The problem? Too much choice. At Blockbuster, you had constraints: limited hours, finite copies of new releases, physical space to browse. You committed to your rental because returning home without watching felt unthinkable. The guest confesses that their ideal comfort space isn't a childhood bedroom but a 2003 Blockbuster in Plano, Texas. There, surrounded by tangible VHS tapes and DVDs, everything would feel okay again. Kareem lets this ode to constrained decision-making breathe. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jLxpk-5SPps https://www.youtube.com/embed/jLxpk-5SPps 89 2025-12-28T18:00:46.000Z 671549 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/we-should-pave-over-cobblestone-globally 2026-04-15T06:40:45.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/YV62HWDBr3I/maxresdefault.jpg We should pave over cobblestone globally A straphanger launches into an unexpectedly passionate case against cobblestone streets, arguing they're "hostile architecture" and "anti-woman infrastructure." What starts as Kareem's skepticism quickly crumbles as the rider connects the dots: try running for your life at 2 a.m. in the West Village wearing heels, ride a bike over those uneven rocks, or push a stroller without giving your baby shaken baby syndrome. The conversation spirals from women's safety to MAGA nostalgia, from rich zip codes clinging to "charm" to the realization that preserving old roads is just an excuse for the city to avoid repairs. Cobblestone is just rocks. By the end, they're ready to pave over everything, Europe included. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YV62HWDBr3I https://www.youtube.com/embed/YV62HWDBr3I 105 2025-12-27T18:00:44.000Z 289985 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/hot-takes-are-ruining-civilization 2026-04-15T06:40:51.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/lWOWlwA1vEE/maxresdefault.jpg Hot takes are ruining civilization Hot takes are ruining civilization," a straphanger declares to Kareem, kicking off a spiraling conversation about social media discourse and why nobody can have real conversations anymore. The rider tears into recycled internet phrases like "period" and "in case anybody needed to hear this," arguing that anything under 240 characters isn't worth saying. They lament lost eye contact and human connection. Then the take flips: maybe hot takes are actually good because they make people think? The self-proclaimed ex-lawyer likes things defined and concrete. Kareem counters that hot takes are essential for growing his global media empire. The conversation careens from intellectual overthinking to "snogging" (British slang for making out), which apparently means exchanging fluids. It's a chaotic riff on online culture eating itself. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lWOWlwA1vEE https://www.youtube.com/embed/lWOWlwA1vEE 123 2025-12-26T18:00:54.000Z 800343 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/america-has-become-a-monotone-hellscape 2026-04-15T06:40:58.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/RyJC0f71Zcg/maxresdefault.jpg America has become a monotone hellscape A self-described jolly, jovial fat bastard tells Kareem that America has become a monotone hellscape, and he's got the evidence to prove it. Nine or ten of his buddies have the same gray and white bathroom. Cookie cutter houses, identical cars, samey buildings. He's also a big nose guy who loves Sarah Jessica Parker's schnoz and wants ladies to stop getting nose jobs. Give him a honker. The conversation spirals into white Christmas lights (they suck), McDonald's dream catcher McFlurries that employees don't stir anymore, vanished Play Places, and Pizza Hut's lost glory days with red Coke glasses and checkered tablecloths. It's a rant about homogenization that touches everything from facial features to fast food, delivered with the passion of someone who really, really misses when things had personality. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RyJC0f71Zcg https://www.youtube.com/embed/RyJC0f71Zcg 113 2025-12-25T18:00:36.000Z 4048834 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/i-think-biracial-people-need-to-lock-in 2026-04-15T06:41:04.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/-6T6FJtkZw8/maxresdefault.jpg I think biracial people need to lock in A biracial rider has a mission: get biracial people to set up their friends in interracial relationships to "bolster the numbers." He's tired of being the minority within the minority at every linkup and wants more biracial banter in the world. Kareem asks if he means just black and white. Nope. The guy wants it all: Asians, Blasians, "Windians" (white and Indian), the whole bunch. A passerby who's half Senegalese and half French jumps in to join what they're calling "the club." They workshop names for their hypothetical biracial hangout spot, landing on the BBB: the Bad Bunch of Biracials. Steve Jobs comes up as a surprise half-Syrian contender. It's community building through demographics. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-6T6FJtkZw8 https://www.youtube.com/embed/-6T6FJtkZw8 95 2025-12-24T18:00:00.000Z 1223181 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/all-dating-advice-should-be-taken-as-an-ibuprofen-grab-your-heattech-uniqlousa 2026-04-15T06:41:10.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/qGrX6Yesvjo/maxresdefault.jpg All Dating Advice Should Be Taken as an Ibuprofen. Grab Your Heattech @uniqlousa All dating advice should be taken as an ibuprofen," a stranger tells Kareem, advocating for limiting your consumption to one or two doses max. The passenger argues we're letting experts we've never met dictate our romantic lives, leaving no room for the whimsy and inevitable mistakes that come with dating. Between reflections on being humiliated by both winter and Tinder in Bushwick, there's a Uniqlo Heattech ad woven in. "I watch the Olympics. I go, you're joking. Have you tried being on Tinder in Bushwick?" The conversation turns meta when Kareem plays devil's advocate, pointing out that his guest also gives dating advice. Their take? You'll never get it right. Be yourself, be pleasant, and maybe you'll find someone who loves that you're a little freak. Consume responsibly. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qGrX6Yesvjo https://www.youtube.com/embed/qGrX6Yesvjo 128 2025-12-23T18:01:07.000Z 732582 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/sadiq-khan-london-is-the-best-city-in-the-world-ft-sadiq-khan-mayor-of-london 2026-04-15T06:41:16.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/I1SrDNkDQuc/maxresdefault.jpg London is the best city in the world. Ft Sadiq Khan Mayor of London Sadiq Khan, the Mayor of London, boldly declares his city the best in the world, sparking a heated but friendly debate with Kareem about whether New York or London reigns supreme. Khan argues London has it all, culture, finance, and tech, while Kareem defends his hometown's crown. The conversation takes a turn when Khan admits London beans are "a bit nasty," earning massive points with Kareem, who's baffled by Britain's obsession with putting beans on everything. They riff on Khan saying "brov," attempt terrible American accents, and compare the mayor to George Clooney. Kareem asks for a key to the city. Khan's response? A flat "No. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=I1SrDNkDQuc https://www.youtube.com/embed/I1SrDNkDQuc 90 2025-12-22T18:00:13.000Z 608648 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/eric-andre-niger-needs-to-change-its-name-you-cant-be-one-g-away-from-the-n-word-ft-eric-an 2026-04-15T06:41:24.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/lVhBdDpMwjk/maxresdefault.jpg Niger needs to change its name, you can't be one G away from the N word. Ft. Eric Andre Eric Andre shows up with scorching hot takes about country names that sound uncomfortably close to slurs. Niger needs rebranding. Guinea too. "It's literally just the pejorative guinea that you people called Italians," he tells Kareem, who's already laughing through the chaos. Andre suggests renaming Niger to "Cool Town" or just Connecticut, then pivots to Ashkenazi Jews ("there's Nazi in the word"), opera being boring lies, and his theory that comments sections are run by the CIA and Russian bots. He sweats through his shirt. Takes it off. The conversation bounces from ICE raids and Home Alone booby traps to people mistaking Kareem for Jussie Smollett, with Andre barely pausing between rants about surfers deserving shark attacks and ballet needing to die. It's rapid-fire absurdism, and Andre's got twenty more takes ready to go before Kareem can even wrap the segment. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lVhBdDpMwjk https://www.youtube.com/embed/lVhBdDpMwjk 162 2025-12-21T18:00:53.000Z 2710982 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/we-need-to-stop-beautiful-people-from-dominating-the-entertainment-industry 2026-04-15T06:41:33.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/1F5991PWDh4/maxresdefault.jpg We need to stop beautiful people from dominating the entertainment industry A stranger on the subway argues that beautiful people have taken over entertainment, and he's not here for hobbits with "fake tits and perfect teeth" in Rings of Power. Kareem pushes back, citing weird-looking icons like Adrien Brody and Joe Pesci. The rider insists those are exceptions. He thanks God Paul Simon is 5'2", because a taller version with a proper hairline wouldn't have made Graceland. They bond over their shared appreciation for the "chopped community" and lament that Hollywood keeps casting conventionally hot actors, pointing to the new Frankenstein movie where they made Jacob Elordi ugly with prosthetics instead of just hiring an ugly guy. The kicker? This Londoner prefers his home city because New York has too many attractive people. Fewer temptations across the pond. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1F5991PWDh4 https://www.youtube.com/embed/1F5991PWDh4 111 2025-12-20T18:00:03.000Z 1444852 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/alia-shawkat-celebrities-need-to-stop-doing-commercials-ft-alia-shawkat 2026-04-15T06:41:39.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/uOwZgKTcoOA/maxresdefault.jpg Celebrities need to stop doing commercials. Ft. Alia Shawkat Alia Shawkat thinks celebrities need to stop doing commercials, and Kareem isn't having it. She's fed up with seeing Pete Davidson's face everywhere, selling everything from Amazon to tampons on "a tiny doll." But Kareem counters: what about the actor who needs that Verizon gig to pay for his kids' college? Shawkat admits the truth hurts. She's not making enough from her art because she won't sell out, while Sydney Sweeney banks on denim ads to fuel her side projects. The conversation spirals into cats, Arab households, and Bill Hicks' famous decree that doing commercials gets you "off the artist roll call forever." They both end up pitching themselves for sponsorships anyway. Money is money. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uOwZgKTcoOA https://www.youtube.com/embed/uOwZgKTcoOA 133 2025-12-19T18:01:17.000Z 960738 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/i-think-they-should-close-down-all-gyms-where-people-work-out-louistheroux 2026-04-15T06:41:44.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/mLsckK6Lkr8/maxresdefault.jpg I think they should close down all gyms where people work out. @LouisTheroux A stranger with a bold take argues that gyms should be shut down entirely because "people spend energy doing nothing" when they could be doing useful work instead. He champions what he calls "ambient exercise," the idea that people should get their workouts from real-world tasks like cycling to work, carrying groceries, or building a wall. Kareem enthusiastically agrees as the conversation spirals into territory about Italian waiters with pepper grinders being the only people who'll stay fit in the future. The rider then suggests closing all shops for two weeks each year so people can live off secondhand goods and leftovers, which leads to a heated debate about whether reheated blood sausage and stale toast are appetizing. A passerby interrupts to say he's listening to the Michael Palin episode. Perfect timing. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mLsckK6Lkr8 https://www.youtube.com/embed/mLsckK6Lkr8 132 2025-12-18T18:01:03.000Z 1644493 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/straight-people-have-terrible-taste-in-gay-people 2026-04-15T06:41:49.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/OSgU8QUDwfg/maxresdefault.jpg Straight people have terrible taste in gay people Straight people have terrible taste in gay people, a straphanger tells Kareem, and the rant that follows is scorching. The rider tears into the Queer Eye guys, imagining them showing up like "five terrorists all dressed like Mugatu from Zoolander" with bomber jackets in shades of purple that don't exist on the ROYGBIV spectrum. The real problem? Progressive straight people are so desperate to be supportive that they give annoying gay men a pass, promoting them all the way up to Secretary of Transportation while talented lesbians like Cynthia Nixon lose to Andrew Cuomo. It's a wild, specific takedown of performative allyship. The punchline: Donald Trump is the most annoying gay person. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OSgU8QUDwfg https://www.youtube.com/embed/OSgU8QUDwfg 118 2025-12-17T19:22:59.000Z 4489162 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/robby-hoffman-either-invite-me-for-dinner-or-dont-but-p-your-potluck-ft-robby-hoffman 2026-04-15T06:41:55.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/6XBD5QWNXH0/maxresdefault.jpg Either invite me for dinner or don't, but p*** your potluck. Ft. Robby Hoffman Robby Hoffman refuses to participate in potlucks, and she's got opinions about dinner party etiquette that'll make you rethink your hosting strategy. She tells Kareem she's done bringing wine to rich people's houses only to watch her carefully selected bottle sit untouched in the corner all night. Her take? If you're inviting people over, you better have food. She grew up on welfare, and even then her mother insisted guests "bring nothing" because asking felt like an insult. Now wealthy people are throwing potlucks, making guests schlep store-bought tabbouli in Tupperware just to pretend they cooked. Hoffman shows up empty-handed to rich friends' homes without shame. She's not there to furnish anyone's wine collection. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6XBD5QWNXH0 https://www.youtube.com/embed/6XBD5QWNXH0 124 2025-12-16T15:27:32.000Z 3096364 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/the-music-coming-out-of-the-uk-right-now-is-the-best-in-the-world 2026-04-15T06:42:01.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/eUl0vIqqlE4/maxresdefault.jpg The music coming out of the UK right now is the best in the world A UK music fan makes a bold claim: the music coming out of the UK right now is the best in the world. Kareem agrees, though he points out the Beatles as a historical counterpoint. The rider reveals he's part of the new wave himself and name-drops Central Cee and Jim Legacy as frontrunners in UK rap. He shouts out SD Kid, a Scouse rapper from Liverpool who's blown up across the Atlantic. The conversation turns to why the UK punches above its weight musically, with the rider crediting competition in such a tiny place. It's all thanks to the internet, they agree. Kareem tries on a British accent, calling his new friend "darling" before they part ways. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eUl0vIqqlE4 https://www.youtube.com/embed/eUl0vIqqlE4 107 2025-12-15T15:49:48.000Z 404006 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/forget-celebrities-sports-stars-politicians-you-should-hype-your-friends 2026-04-15T06:42:07.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/x604OgAF3pI/maxresdefault.jpg Forget celebrities, sports stars, politicians, you should hype your friends A stranger on the subway thinks we should hype our friends like celebrities. Kareem agrees. The rider points to marathon spectators waving giant face signs and shrieking when their people run by, then asks why we don't bring that energy to everyday life. Why not write press coverage about your friends? Why not wear a t-shirt that just says "Scott" like it's concert merch? The conversation spirals into a manifesto about treating friends, and even strangers, with the enthusiasm usually reserved for Taylor Swift or sports stars. Give your friends little presents all the time. Tell random people they look good. Hand out tissues, metaphorically speaking. It's a wholesome call to redirect our fan energy toward the people who actually matter, whether that's your buddy Mike or someone struggling on the train who needs a moment of grace. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x604OgAF3pI https://www.youtube.com/embed/x604OgAF3pI 93 2025-12-14T15:15:53.000Z 341224 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/were-in-the-worst-era-of-wealthy-people 2026-04-15T06:42:12.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/Dm-qSmgAqIo/maxresdefault.jpg We're in the worst era of wealthy people We're in the worst era of wealthy people," a rider tells Kareem, kicking off a spirited debate about modern philanthropy. The Medicis gave us the Renaissance. Today's billionaires? "Warehouses and Katy Perry in space." Both agree that past elites like the Rockefellers and Carnegie at least built universities and town halls, while contemporary moguls just build private islands and hang out exclusively with each other. The rider runs a chess club with DJs in East London and has a modest proposal: rich people should fund him instead. How much does he need? "A million" pounds to build chess clubs around the world. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Dm-qSmgAqIo https://www.youtube.com/embed/Dm-qSmgAqIo 88 2025-12-13T16:47:42.000Z 754851 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/we-should-ban-no-show-socks 2026-04-15T06:42:18.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/7NMd2a0Ho-s/maxresdefault.jpg We should ban no show socks No-show socks are ruining Britain. That's the passionate position of a British woman who locks in on one of fashion's most divisive accessories with Kareem. She's got a clear stance: if you're going to wear socks, commit to the sock. Don't try to trick people with that tiny sliver of fabric peeking out above your shoe. "You can always see them," she argues, recalling spotting the offense on a plane. Kareem enthusiastically agrees, showing off his own proper long socks while the conversation spirals into jokes about Britain's real problems. Not Brexit, not immigration. The no-show sock epidemic. Socks, after all, are like hijabs for feet, and everyone should keep their ankles covered. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7NMd2a0Ho-s https://www.youtube.com/embed/7NMd2a0Ho-s 90 2025-12-12T18:22:42.000Z 278369 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/we-should-have-one-trailer-before-a-film 2026-04-15T06:42:24.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/SD84l2194HI/maxresdefault.jpg We should have one trailer before a film A straphanger makes the bold argument that movie theaters should only show one trailer before films, sparking an instant debate with Kareem about popcorn consumption and runtime bloat. The conversation veers wildly as they bond over 90-minute movies being the sweet spot and struggle to remember Tom Hiddleston's name, accidentally inventing "Thomas Middleditch Hiddleston" and "Meditate Cumberbat" in the process. They swap favorite films (Notting Hill, Parent Trap), the rider demonstrates a surprisingly convincing Lindsay Lohan-inspired American accent, and Kareem somehow gets fully converted to the one-trailer cause. It's a chaotic ride through cinema pet peeves that ends in total agreement. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SD84l2194HI https://www.youtube.com/embed/SD84l2194HI 126 2025-12-11T21:14:38.000Z 1576007 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/todd-barry-any-food-thats-served-hot-should-never-be-served-cold-ft-todd-barry 2026-04-15T06:42:29.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/B3TQ5On9sc8/maxresdefault.jpg Any food that's served hot should never be served cold. Ft. Todd Barry Todd Barry comes in swinging with a controversial take: any food that's served hot should never be served cold. Kareem immediately disagrees. Cold pizza? Great, according to Todd. Chinese food straight from the fridge? He'll eat it. The conversation spirals into Thanksgiving hatred, with both agreeing the holiday feast is disgusting even when hot. "I would rather have tacos," Kareem says, suggesting Chinatown instead. Todd admits he's done exactly that because "no one wants me at their Thanksgiving dinner." They bond over an Eric Adams quote about haters being waiters at the table of success before Todd throws out another take: all bands play too loud. Once again, Kareem disagrees. They're just not on the same page. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=B3TQ5On9sc8 https://www.youtube.com/embed/B3TQ5On9sc8 53 2025-12-11T01:23:03.000Z 970594 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/i-dont-think-we-really-take-in-or-deep-how-insane-animals-are 2026-04-15T06:42:35.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/09HSXCQXihA/maxresdefault.jpg I don't think we really take in or deep how insane animals are A straphanger armed with a list of rapid-fire observations takes Kareem on a whirlwind tour of linguistic oddities and underappreciated truths. Animals are insane. We don't think about it enough. Imagine NASA discovering French bulldogs on Jupiter and trying to explain those caved-in faces and floppy ears back to Earth. The guest makes a compelling case that watermelons and cucumbers should swap names, insists that "ant" and "fireplace" are perfectly named, and argues that the key to happiness is always having something coming in the post (even if it's just a scalpel for arts and crafts). He's also got strong feelings about deluxe albums, comparing them to restaurants serving you bonus dinner after you've already finished. Kareem mostly agrees, occasionally pushes back, and tries to figure out how long this list actually is. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=09HSXCQXihA https://www.youtube.com/embed/09HSXCQXihA 103 2025-12-09T14:45:30.000Z 1736276 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/cpemiWT5Z8Y 2026-04-15T04:40:23.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/cpemiWT5Z8Y/maxresdefault.jpg [………………………….] The host catches someone in London, breaking from the usual NYC subway setting. When asked for their take, the person gives a hilariously minimal response about beans before declaring "Long live the queen." It's giving British stereotype energy. The #kingsguard hashtag suggests this might be someone dressed as a royal guard, making the whole interaction even more ridiculous and perfectly deadpan. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cpemiWT5Z8Y https://www.youtube.com/embed/cpemiWT5Z8Y 51 2025-12-08T19:37:41.000Z 420507 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/i-dont-think-hollywood-should-make-any-black-movies 2026-04-15T06:42:40.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/URTQWlIQxN8/maxresdefault.jpg I don't think Hollywood should make any black movies A rider with bold opinions tells Kareem that Hollywood shouldn't make any Black movies, Indian movies, or minority films at all. His reasoning? White studios will butcher the stories, and creators become enslaved to the money. "When you taking somebody else's money, you taking a dick of you," he argues. The solution is simple: get your own funding. He points out that even billionaires like Tyler Perry and Rihanna still make white billionaires richer, so why not focus on making stuff for your community instead? To prove his point, he's launched his own production company, Hollywood Productions, starting with a film called A Nightmare on Malcolm X Boulevard. The title? It's literally on his tooth. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=URTQWlIQxN8 https://www.youtube.com/embed/URTQWlIQxN8 96 2025-12-08T14:56:30.000Z 1468240 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/ola-labib-boomers-should-not-be-told-when-content-is-al-ft-ola-labib 2026-04-15T06:42:48.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/bh_F2-uX7E4/maxresdefault.jpg Boomers should not be told when content is Al. Ft. Ola Labib Ola Labib has a spicy take: boomers shouldn't be told when content is AI-generated. Why ruin the magic? If her dad wants to believe Morgan Freeman converted to Islam and is "giving fatwa to the people," let him enjoy it. If her aunt thinks a cat memorized the Quran, that's beautiful delusion. Kareem agrees it's like letting kids believe in Santa, or as Ola calls him, "Baba Claus." The conversation spirals through fake news about the Bush family converting, whether Trump would claim to be "on my period" to skip Ramadan fasting, and Ola's personal embarrassment when her husband revealed that viral gorilla-wrestling-an-alligator video she shared was AI. She was crushed. They bond over matching trousers, and Ola casually mentions her husband went to high school with Kareem and converted to Islam, because apparently everyone does. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bh_F2-uX7E4 https://www.youtube.com/embed/bh_F2-uX7E4 139 2025-12-07T15:01:41.000Z 1662527 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/we-need-to-be-talking-about-dinosaurs-way-more-jjackcoyne 2026-04-15T06:42:54.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/czK16UOanR4/maxresdefault.jpg We need to be talking about dinosaurs way more. @J@JackCoyne A straphanger drops an absolute mind-bender: we need to be talking about dinosaurs way more. Kareem agrees. The conversation spirals gloriously as they debate whether dinosaurs are even real or just "in the same category as ghosts," whether they're lizards or birds, and why adults get stuck with kids' books while children waste their dinosaur knowledge on youth. Things escalate. They compare dinosaurs to blue whales, which apparently used to be deer. Then comes the revelation: "OH, I JUST REALIZED THAT'S WHY THEY'RE CALLED FOSSIL FUELS." Gasoline comes from dinosaurs. So does plastic. The epiphany hits hard. Maybe if people were more sympathetic to dinosaurs, we wouldn't be destroying the planet with their liquefied remains. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=czK16UOanR4 https://www.youtube.com/embed/czK16UOanR4 162 2025-12-06T14:45:00.000Z 2127136 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/bath-mats-are-disgusting 2026-04-15T06:43:00.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/DMpT1onh4wg/maxresdefault.jpg Bath mats are disgusting Bath mats are disgusting, according to one anonymous rider who believes toweling off in the shower is the adult way to go. Kareem defends the bath mat. This snowballs into a rapid-fire list of strong opinions: hot food on planes smells bad, so don't bring it. Flying solo is the only way to travel. This guy and his wife take separate flights and he's totally fine with that. Gym time is sacred between 8:00 a.m. and 11:00 a.m., so no breakfast meetings. Movies are too long and boring, even on planes. The guest drops casual mentions of heated hotel tiles and never sitting next to friends on flights. It's a masterclass in having opinions about everything. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DMpT1onh4wg https://www.youtube.com/embed/DMpT1onh4wg 115 2025-12-05T20:31:59.000Z 385936 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/london-is-objectively-a-better-city-than-new-york 2026-04-15T06:43:05.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/Kxf-n1K5bEQ/maxresdefault.jpg London is objectively a better city than New York A London fan throws down the gauntlet, insisting her city beats New York on every front. Kareem pushes back hard. The rider rattles off her case: better food scene, superior architecture, neighborhoods with distinct vibes, and "the Tube is ten times better than the subway." That's objective, she claims. Kareem fires back with New York's rivers, ocean access, and a zinger about London being "iPhone 2" while New York's the latest model. She counters that New York literally copied the name from Old York in England. The debate gets heated, with Kareem dismissing her London-loving friends as probably being from Ohio. Neither budges an inch. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Kxf-n1K5bEQ https://www.youtube.com/embed/Kxf-n1K5bEQ 105 2025-12-04T15:49:54.000Z 1156797 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/the-key-to-getting-women-is-how-you-smell-chabuddy-glondon 2026-04-15T06:43:11.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/zZzQaO7TJOA/maxresdefault.jpg The key to getting women is how you smell! Chabuddy G.📍London A stranger in London delivers one of the show's most outrageous dating philosophies: "The first hole you penetrate is her nostril." He insists that smell, not looks or money, is the key to attracting women. Kareem gamely plays along as the conversation spirals into increasingly absurd territory, with the rider claiming he opens with "I have a very high sperm count" and emphasizing that girth matters more than length. The two trade impressions of each other's scent. Kareem detects "man juice" and turmeric. The rider goes for women 45 plus with "leathery skin" that "looks like shark skin." It's chaotic, borderline offensive, and genuinely funny as the self-proclaimed "curry Casanova" explains his unconventional approach to romance with complete confidence. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zZzQaO7TJOA https://www.youtube.com/embed/zZzQaO7TJOA 128 2025-12-03T17:08:38.000Z 1123090 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/rachel-sennott-on-how-girls-insecure-and-sex-and-the-city-shaped-her 2026-04-15T06:43:21.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/JbrSkHgSW6s/maxresdefault.jpg Rachel Sennott on How Girls, Insecure, and Sex and the City Shaped Her Rachel Sennott, the actor and comedian behind Bottoms and the new series I Love LA, tells Kareem she's been crying every day for a month after finishing her show. She's overwhelmed. She wrote it, starred in it, directed an episode, and now she's reading the reviews at "19 minutes" of screen time. They talk about her controversial take that everyone should get addicted to something once to prove they can quit (she picks nicotine and laxatives as examples, then immediately backtracks when Kareem says "opioids"). She describes I Love LA as "Entourage for Internet It Girls" with inspiration from Atlanta, Girls, Insecure, and Sex and the City. When asked which Entourage character she is, she claims Lloyd. She's a Marnie from Girls, a Miranda meets Charlotte from Sex and the City, and she used to have a crush on Turtle because "his pants are always too long." Kareem's a crammer who aimed for B minuses in college. Rachel carries a physical planner in her purse and makes to-do lists she can physically cross off. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JbrSkHgSW6s https://www.youtube.com/embed/JbrSkHgSW6s 732 2025-12-03T14:00:29.000Z 184432 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/gamblings-okay-as-long-as-you-keep-winning 2026-04-15T06:43:27.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/WY5W-McYW6w/maxresdefault.jpg Gambling's okay as long as you keep winning A straphanger with 58 years of gambling experience delivers his philosophy: just keep doubling up until you win. Kareem pushes back on the sports betting advice, pointing out that people are losing college tuitions and mortgaging houses. The gambler isn't fazed. He's already told his daughter to gamble, casually mentions borrowing from "Fat Tony" if you need extra cash, and insists the whole thing is fun even when you're throwing soda at the TV after a loss. He had the Raiders last night. Did he win? No. Does it matter how much he lost? Apparently not. The conversation ends with Kareem asking for the bookie's number but declining Fat Tony's contact info. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WY5W-McYW6w https://www.youtube.com/embed/WY5W-McYW6w 107 2025-12-02T15:54:24.000Z 1057496 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/batmans-a-dckhead-iidlesbandbatman 2026-04-15T06:43:32.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/DZOguwy-t5I/maxresdefault.jpg Batman's a d*ckhead. @I@IDLESBANDbatman Batman's a billionaire cop who goes around beating up drug addicts instead of investing in Gotham's infrastructure. That's the take from a rider who tears into the Dark Knight as a "libertarian nightmare" with Kareem, arguing that Bruce Wayne chose to learn karate and play vigilante rather than fund healthcare or community programs. He's not even a real superhero. Spider-Man got bit by a spider, but Batman just decided to be rich and violent. The conversation spirals into why left-wing politics can't compete with MAGA slogans when the real solution is a boring 50-year plan for free healthcare, not a guy in a cape punching vulnerable people in the face. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DZOguwy-t5I https://www.youtube.com/embed/DZOguwy-t5I 95 2025-12-01T15:16:10.000Z 666465 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/american-food-is-the-best-foodjjoeyhamburgerfood 2026-04-15T06:43:37.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/yblezk8E9FQ/maxresdefault.jpg American food is the best food.@J@JoeyHamburgerfood A straphanger arrives with a pie chart that's literally a pie to argue that American food reigns supreme. His reasoning? We do pizza better than Italy across Detroit, New York, Chicago, and Iowa styles. The debate spirals into territory about France's most famous chef being a rat, Miller Lite being the prettiest beer ever made, and the physics of cartoon bears floating toward window pies. Kareem pushes back hard, insisting there's no such thing as American food, just food in America made by immigrants. The rider counters that those immigrants are Americans. The conversation veers through hero sandwiches, Doritos invented in labs, and pancakes as fork-and-knife pizza. It's absurd, weirdly patriotic, and ends with a bear impression. American food will literally kill you. That part's true. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yblezk8E9FQ https://www.youtube.com/embed/yblezk8E9FQ 105 2025-11-30T15:03:01.000Z 985281 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/sydnee-washington-its-our-duty-to-tell-our-annoying-friends-theyre-annoying-ft-sydnee-washington 2026-04-15T06:43:44.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/cDCyCXRMWmM/maxresdefault.jpg It's our duty to tell our annoying friends they're annoying. Ft. Sydnee Washington Sydnee Washington arrives with a mission: friends need to call out their annoying friends. She rattles off a comprehensive list that includes people who slap you while laughing, talk too close with stale breath, watch TikToks without headphones, and interrupt constantly. The germaphobes living in New York City? Annoying. People who start podcasts? Also annoying, even though she admits she has one herself. Kareem points out the irony throughout, especially when Sydnee says "I love you" too much is annoying right after showering him with compliments. The conversation gets messy when she declares friends who date men are the worst, leading to an awkward moment where Kareem stays silent. She calls him out for not jumping in to save her. He's not having it. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cDCyCXRMWmM https://www.youtube.com/embed/cDCyCXRMWmM 136 2025-11-29T14:41:44.000Z 2029772 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/the-greatest-privilege-is-to-have-emotionally-supportive-parents 2026-04-15T06:43:49.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/rOVkz6ulrK0/maxresdefault.jpg The greatest privilege is to have emotionally supportive parents The greatest privilege is to have emotionally supportive parents," a rider tells Kareem, kicking off a surprisingly wholesome conversation about what really matters. They both agree that emotional support beats wealth or connections every time. The rider argues you'd be wrong not to choose it, explaining that loving parents give you the resilience to pivot when life hands you lemons and the boldness to chase your dreams. Kareem lands on a perfect line: "The true nepotism is parents who love you." The rider, clearly blessed with supportive folks, gives them a shoutout. Mom and Dad are definitely watching. It's a refreshing take that sidesteps the usual wealth and privilege arguments for something more fundamental, and Kareem notes the positivity is probably because his meme pages got disabled. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rOVkz6ulrK0 https://www.youtube.com/embed/rOVkz6ulrK0 105 2025-11-28T14:32:40.000Z 984769 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/we-need-a-salary-cap-in-hollywood-to-make-the-film-industry-sustainable-for-crew 2026-04-15T06:43:55.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/ddl-8WGi7qc/maxresdefault.jpg We need a salary cap in Hollywood to make the film industry sustainable for crew members A film industry PA and filmmaker makes a bold pitch: Hollywood needs a salary cap on A-list talent to protect crew members. He's spent ten years watching all the money flow to stars like Tom Cruise, who can pull $50 million while crews scrape by on "regular" pay. Kareem agrees everyone in entertainment is overpaid, including himself, though he jokes he's not making $5 million. The conversation turns hopeful when they discuss profit-sharing models like Ben Affleck and Matt Damon's Artist Equity, which shared profits with the crew on Air. Dwayne Johnson took a pay cut for Smashing Machine. That's the future. The rider also hosts a film series at Cabell Hill Cinemas, screening Palestinian films to raise funds for communities actually depicted on screen. His message: support local theaters and the people who make movies possible. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ddl-8WGi7qc https://www.youtube.com/embed/ddl-8WGi7qc 118 2025-11-27T15:21:26.000Z 538627 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/nature-is-boring-jjeffosealnature 2026-04-15T06:44:02.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/9aEbjEct-BQ/maxresdefault.jpg Nature is boring. @J@JeffOSealnature A picture of Half Dome is good enough. That's the stance of one city-loving rider who tells Kareem that nature is fundamentally boring and there's no reason to visit places like the Grand Canyon or Joshua Tree when you can just look at a photo. The Pyramids, though? Those are worth seeing because they're man-made. The rider's main complaint about hiking is the absence of animals, if you could animal-watch in nature the way you people-watch in the city, that'd be different, but wild encounters never seem to happen. Even while camping in Marin with views of distant city lights, all they could think was "I would rather be where the lights are." Central Park works because you can still see the buildings. An empty alley off Canal Street that's been in movies? That's their babbling brook. Kareem's response: "Touch grass. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9aEbjEct-BQ https://www.youtube.com/embed/9aEbjEct-BQ 115 2025-11-26T15:33:14.000Z 427807 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/if-you-plug-your-ears-when-a-siren-passes-youre-a-big-baby-ft-milo 2026-04-15T06:44:09.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/kmAXHuzy_7k/maxresdefault.jpg If you plug your ears when a siren passes, you're a big baby. Ft. Milo A straphanger opens with an unexpected gesture: giving Kareem his flowers for the show, noting that even the crew didn't do it earlier. Then comes the actual take. If you plug your ears when a siren passes, you're a big baby who should be ashamed. Kareem immediately disagrees, calling it noise sensitivity, but the rider stands firm, insisting it's "one of the more pitiful stances that a human being could make with their body." The conversation spirals into whether the guest's Drake versus Kendrick take is hot enough to shut down the show (it's not), more flower-giving, and an earnest plea for new friends. The whole thing is wrapped in repeated declarations of "peace, love, and positivity," even as the rider refuses to back down on the siren stance. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kmAXHuzy_7k https://www.youtube.com/embed/kmAXHuzy_7k 139 2025-11-25T15:38:38.000Z 1140313 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/rosalia-listening-to-music-low-gives-you-bad-luck-rosalia 2026-04-15T06:44:15.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/aTHtf11J8hM/maxresdefault.jpg Listening to music low gives you bad luck. @rosalia Rosalía Vila Tobella brings two bold takes to Kareem's subway car. First, she insists that listening to music at low volume gives you bad luck. It's not scientific, she admits, it's spiritual. To truly enjoy music, you need to blast it loud enough to catch every detail. Then the conversation shifts to mirrors and self-perception. Rosalía argues there are no perfect mirrors in nature, so humans weren't meant to see themselves constantly the way phones and cameras allow. Looking at your phone always makes you feel ugly, she says. The solution? See others more than yourself. The other becomes your true reflection, helping you understand who you really are. Kareem calls it profound. It is. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aTHtf11J8hM https://www.youtube.com/embed/aTHtf11J8hM 122 2025-11-24T15:06:48.000Z 785269 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/rosalia-says-adhd-makes-her-more-creative 2026-04-15T06:44:23.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/wFVopIrIwwI/maxresdefault.jpg Rosalía Says ADHD Makes Her More Creative Rosalía tells Kareem that listening to music quietly gives you bad luck. She blasts everything to hear the details. The Spanish singer opens up about ADHD shaping her creative process, why every album she makes sounds completely different, and how reading hagiographies (stories of saints) for a year inspired her operatic new record. She gets profound about mirrors and phones, arguing that "there are no perfect mirrors in nature" and we weren't meant to see ourselves this much. The conversation winds through her horizontal writing process (started because she didn't have a table as a teenager), childhood in the forest, the 13 languages on her album, and stumbling into a Brooklyn church after hearing gospel on the street. She's spiritual, not strictly religious. Connects with Buddhism, Islam, Christianity, and more. Making the album was about getting closer to God, though she still doesn't have answers. That's why it exists. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wFVopIrIwwI https://www.youtube.com/embed/wFVopIrIwwI 894 2025-11-24T14:15:09.000Z 211760 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/eggs-do-not-need-seasoning-aaminahimani 2026-04-15T06:44:29.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/UA9qwcTFj1E/maxresdefault.jpg Eggs do not need seasoning. @A@AminahImani A straphanger drops an absolute bombshell: eggs don't need seasoning. She discovered this by accident, forgetting to season her eggs one morning and realizing they tasted fine anyway. But her philosophy goes way deeper than breakfast. Food isn't supposed to taste delicious or make you want to slap your mama. It's just fuel. She's done with the pleasure, which she calls "the drug." Her friend got mad she didn't have hot sauce. She doesn't care. She boils fruit in the morning now. Stewed apples, pears, peaches. Kareem is horrified. The raw-dogging mindset has officially gone too far. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UA9qwcTFj1E https://www.youtube.com/embed/UA9qwcTFj1E 116 2025-11-23T16:20:08.000Z 2408908 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/nobody-actually-wants-to-take-a-silly-photo-ccolinandsamir 2026-04-15T06:44:34.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/rERXaUABJXk/maxresdefault.jpg Nobody actually wants to take a "silly" photo. @C@ColinandSamir A straphanger delivers a hot take on group photos: nobody actually wants to do the "silly one." Kareem pushes back hard, insisting he's "down to clown" when the moment calls for it. The debate spirals into a philosophical argument about where silly photos even end up (the rider admits to having 85,000 photos on his phone but can't find a single silly one). The real tension emerges when they try to demonstrate what a good silly face looks like. Neither can pull it off. Kareem attempts to prove his point by forcing a silly photo right there on camera. The rider hates it. Kareem's frustrated. No resolution, just two people who fundamentally disagree about performative spontaneity. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rERXaUABJXk https://www.youtube.com/embed/rERXaUABJXk 101 2025-11-22T17:40:56.000Z 611496 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/i-think-men-should-touch-each-other-more-ttilekallbetternyc 2026-04-15T06:44:40.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/y5V0BFmYMIc/maxresdefault.jpg I think men should touch each other more. @T@TilekAllBetternyc A straphanger offers a bold solution to the male loneliness epidemic: physical touch. Instead of burdening someone with your "situationship" on Hinge, he suggests guys should hug their brothers and kiss their homies on the cheek. Kareem's into it. They hold hands while talking, the passenger explaining that men in the Middle East walk down the street hand in hand without shame. "I've never really felt lonely cuz I've always kind of been doing this," he says. The conversation gets playful as they test boundaries: hugging's great, cheek kisses are acceptable, but rubbing? Too far. They're clearly comfortable touching throughout, though the passenger draws the line at one specific kissing technique and admits he was recently scammed, hence the body armor he's wearing. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=y5V0BFmYMIc https://www.youtube.com/embed/y5V0BFmYMIc 104 2025-11-21T15:19:43.000Z 1143445 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/everyone-should-get-addicted-to-something-at-least-once 2026-04-15T06:44:46.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/lYmfktkCPYY/maxresdefault.jpg Everyone should get addicted to something at least once Everyone needs to get addicted to one thing at least once in their life to prove to themselves that they can break an addiction." That's the hot take from a rider who claims his half-Irish heritage came with paternal warnings about addiction he chose to ignore. He dabbled in nicotine for about a year, fought those demons, and supposedly won. Kareem's not buying it, especially after spotting him smoking a cigarette moments earlier. The excuses pile up fast: you can smoke if you're in Europe, and New York basically counts as Europe now, and if you're with friends, and if there's a seafood tower involved. The conversation spirals when another rider mentions trying opioids, prompting the original take-giver to backpedal hard. He admits he was also addicted to laxatives and had two other controversial takes he's now too scared to share. The take morphs into something safer: "Vulnerability is a strength. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lYmfktkCPYY https://www.youtube.com/embed/lYmfktkCPYY 112 2025-11-19T17:48:46.000Z 3377073 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/drake-as-a-half-black-half-white-person-i-think-we-all-need-a-break-from-biracials 2026-04-15T06:44:51.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/DBMdjO-jIKM/maxresdefault.jpg As a half black, half white person, I think we all need a break from biracials Drake makes the list of "evil" biracials alongside "Drone Papa Obama" in this provocative take from a half-black, half-white passenger who thinks we all need a break from mixed-race people. The guest argues that biracials have two main problems: whining about acceptance and failing to acknowledge how they present to the world. He introduces his "race war theory" as a mental exercise for understanding identity. If war broke out tomorrow, what team would you be on? The answer should ground you. He admits he's "black dad, white mom," which apparently carries a certain reputation in the biracial community compared to the "pretty cool" reverse. Not all mixed people are bad though. Zendaya, Halle Berry, and Blake Griffin get their flowers. Kareem confesses he wasn't aware of all this discourse. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DBMdjO-jIKM https://www.youtube.com/embed/DBMdjO-jIKM 131 2025-11-18T14:56:29.000Z 2317444 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/no-coffee-shop-should-have-only-one-bathroom 2026-04-15T06:44:57.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/ixqCgVd3xzM/maxresdefault.jpg No coffee shop should have only one bathroom A stranger on the subway starts with a take about restroom access, but Kareem shuts him down: Matthew Donovan already did that one. So the rider pivots. Coffee shops serve "diarrhea juice" but only have one bathroom with a shared key. His solution? Face-to-face toilets. That way New Yorkers can reconnect while doing their business. Kareem thinks people would just stay on their phones, but his new friend insists you've got to talk to the person you're pooping with. "How's your day? How's it going?" The conversation gets progressively weirder until they agree to test the theory in real time. There's a two-toilet bathroom in Bushwick. They head for the L train together. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ixqCgVd3xzM https://www.youtube.com/embed/ixqCgVd3xzM 123 2025-11-17T17:46:32.000Z 1211770 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/there-are-too-many-handshake-options-colinandsamir 2026-04-15T06:45:04.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/T3bNh9ragkQ/maxresdefault.jpg There are too many handshake options. @ColinandSamir There are far too many options when two men approach each other for a handshake, and an anonymous rider thinks it's ruining potential friendships. He tells Kareem the confusion is real: you could hand hug, hand hug and lock, slap-release-hug-back slap, or just bump fists. Then there's the hugging lobby, which tried to make hugging the new standard greeting but created even more anxiety. "There's nothing I hate more than when someone in front of me is greeting everybody," the rider explains, because now you're locked into whatever they did with the last person. They also touch on how handshakes change based on race. The solution? Maybe Europe's got it figured out with their cheek kiss thing, though neither can remember what it's called. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=T3bNh9ragkQ https://www.youtube.com/embed/T3bNh9ragkQ 128 2025-11-16T14:53:42.000Z 1191346 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/there-are-not-enough-djs-in-the-world 2026-04-15T06:45:09.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/c-oaO49ZdMI/maxresdefault.jpg There are not enough DJs in the world There are not enough DJs in the world," a rider declares to Kareem, igniting a fiery debate about what separates real DJs from button-pushers. The distinction is technical. If you can't beat match by ear, drop tracks on the platter with your hand, or respond to a crowd in real time, you're just a playlist. The rider insists everyone can become a DJ but argues the craft requires 10,000 hours and can't be bypassed, lamenting that the art form is dying while poseurs multiply. Kareem floats a modest proposal: maybe cities should issue DJ permits, like driver's licenses, capping each at 2,000. The rider isn't having it. When asked about song requests, the answer is diplomatic but firm: "I'm going to say yeah and be kind. Doesn't mean I'm going to play it. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=c-oaO49ZdMI https://www.youtube.com/embed/c-oaO49ZdMI 91 2025-11-15T14:47:31.000Z 427934 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/women-should-stop-wearing-bras 2026-04-15T06:45:16.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/iZbUEQx8HYc/maxresdefault.jpg Women should stop wearing bras A straphanger shares her passionate take on why women should ditch bras for good, launching into an uproarious rant about comfort, male gaze, and bodily autonomy. She's not holding back. The woman explains how bras were designed by men to push everything up for their viewing pleasure, comparing the situation to "let our nipples do what they want to do" and declaring she wants to "free the titties." Things get increasingly chaotic as she describes her "handicap titty" (she's missing one nipple), demonstrates the complicated unhooking mechanism required for her bra with its "whole seat belt on the back," and insists that losing a nipple messes up your equilibrium enough to qualify for handicap parking. Kareem mostly agrees and laughs along as she recruits fellow passengers to her anti-bra crusade, turning a simple clothing debate into an unforgettable subway moment. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iZbUEQx8HYc https://www.youtube.com/embed/iZbUEQx8HYc 122 2025-11-14T19:11:37.000Z 252521 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/ellie-keller-in-person-shopping-is-better-than-online-shopping-ft-ellie-keller-and-kohls 2026-04-15T06:45:22.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/1JyzhKHnRPA/maxresdefault.jpg In person shopping is better than online shopping. Ft Ellie Keller and ​⁠@kohls Ellie Keller makes the case for hitting actual stores instead of scrolling through tabs. Her reasoning? In-person shopping means buying less stuff, not just mindlessly "adding to cart, adding to cart." She and Kareem riff on the joys of feeling the goods, smelling the goods, and asking random ninety-five-year-old women for fashion advice. The conversation takes a turn when Keller argues that standing in line is actually good for people. Kareem immediately disagrees. She wins him back over, though, by celebrating the virtues of waiting without staring at your phone. It's a sponsored plug for Kohl's that somehow becomes a genuine debate about consumerism, patience, and whether we've all forgotten how to just exist in public spaces. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1JyzhKHnRPA https://www.youtube.com/embed/1JyzhKHnRPA 107 2025-11-13T16:35:42.000Z 1278265 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/woody-harrelson-theyre-loading-planes-improperly-they-should-load-it-from-back-to-front-ft-woody 2026-04-15T06:45:28.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/CnXSiv4CIu8/maxresdefault.jpg They're loading planes improperly, they should load it from back to front. Ft Woody Harrelson Woody Harrelson has strong opinions about airplane boarding. They should load from back to front, he tells Kareem, because the current system is "purely a psychological class-based system." The conversation quickly spirals into a comedy bit about being a "closet proletariat sympathizer" and whether David Blaine counts as a magician for the working class. Harrelson also describes himself as both an anarchist and a capitalist, joking that he's full of dysfunctionality because of his contrasting viewpoints. It's like being bisexual, Kareem offers. A random passerby jumps in with thoughts on pants, arguing that jeans shouldn't be too skinny or too baggy. Just right. Harrelson agrees, declaring the stranger "an expert in pants. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CnXSiv4CIu8 https://www.youtube.com/embed/CnXSiv4CIu8 131 2025-11-12T16:28:46.000Z 1285701 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/woody-harrelson-told-me-hes-an-anarchist 2026-04-15T06:45:34.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/vdICwrN0mkw/maxresdefault.jpg Woody Harrelson Told Me He’s an Anarchist Woody Harrelson climbs aboard the subway with Kareem and immediately starts riffing about airplane boarding policies, calling them "psychological class warfare." The actor describes himself as an anarchist and anti-government, though he admits he's "not hardcore" about it since he's also "total capitalist at the same time." He pitches a new political party called "socialist capitalism" with the slogan "If you want to be rich, be rich." The conversation veers from his college theology studies to his hedonistic phase after fame hit. Harrelson stumps passengers with trivia about Minnesota having the most shoreline in America. A stranger named Ted asks for a selfie. The chaos is pure Woody, mixing political theory with absurdist humor while rattling through the tunnels. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vdICwrN0mkw https://www.youtube.com/embed/vdICwrN0mkw 889 2025-11-12T14:15:06.000Z 367000 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/i-dont-think-we-should-build-any-new-casinos-in-new-york-city 2026-04-15T06:45:41.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/wGyxRc3zgRk/maxresdefault.jpg I don't think we should build any new casinos in New York City A stranger on the subway has a fiery take about New York's casino expansion plans. He's furious that developers want to build casinos in Flushing, a working-class Asian immigrant neighborhood, and on 20 acres of public land in the Bronx that would somehow net Trump $100 million. Kareem agrees completely. The problem? "They know that unfortunately folks in my community struggle with the addictions of gambling and they want to exploit that." Instead of casinos extracting wealth from vulnerable communities, he argues, the city could build affordable housing, parks, or even bring the New York Giants back to actual New York. He's organizing with the Flushing Anti-Casino Group for a rally on November 16. Kareem's takeaway is perfect: "There's no such thing as a friendly neighborhood casino." The episode ends with Kareem promising to visit Flushing for all-you-can-eat crab at Shaking Crab. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wGyxRc3zgRk https://www.youtube.com/embed/wGyxRc3zgRk 110 2025-11-11T15:45:14.000Z 550492 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/gay-people-make-better-parents-than-straight-people 2026-04-15T06:45:48.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/xXP6YsU0JmY/maxresdefault.jpg Gay people make better parents than straight people A subway rider with three lesbian moms and two gay dads delivers a provocative take: gay people make better parents than straight people. Her reasoning? "Gay people never have kids by accident." The conversation gets personal fast as she explains her unconventional family structure, raised by six parents total after her two moms broke up and found new partners. She even calls herself "the black sheep" for being bi instead of fully gay. Kareem's fascinated by the family dynamics and wants to know how he can parent like a lesbian mom. The answer involves getting upset about legumes, mastering passive aggression, and having strong opinions about men. Style-wise, he's already there. The rider, who works with kids professionally, insists children raised by gay parents are "swaggy as hell" and credits queer families for building entire communities around child-rearing, free from rigid gender norms. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xXP6YsU0JmY https://www.youtube.com/embed/xXP6YsU0JmY 123 2025-11-10T14:49:07.000Z 1810386 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/maddy-kelly-we-need-to-start-talking-about-how-were-gonna-get-off-instagram-and-meta-ft-madd 2026-04-15T06:45:56.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/jzvuCVryTYI/maxresdefault.jpg We need to start talking about how we're gonna get off Instagram and Meta. Ft. Maddy Kelly Maddy Kelly thinks it's time to get off Instagram and Meta, and Kareem's right there with her. The problem? "There has to be a way for you to find out who got engaged from your high school without electing Donald Trump twice." Kelly, who started on Instagram at 17 posting pictures of braids she did, argues the movement needs to start at dinner parties, talking in real life. She compares it to moving apartments when your landlord lets Russian propagandists into your spare bedroom. Kareem points out the brutal irony: last month he got 5 million hits and Meta paid him $5. Not even enough for a New York cappuccino. They disagree on whether TikTok counts as moving, and Kelly blames boomers for ruining Instagram's vibe, though Kareem calls that a copout. The real issue is collective action. Nobody wants to lose their followers. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jzvuCVryTYI https://www.youtube.com/embed/jzvuCVryTYI 118 2025-11-09T16:29:33.000Z 2826325 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/no-emojis-covering-kids-faces-on-social-media 2026-04-15T06:46:02.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/BlC9sCJZ-KA/maxresdefault.jpg No emojis covering kids faces on social media A stranger on the subway has strong opinions about emoji-censored kid photos on social media. The take? Either post a photo or don't. Covering your child's face with a heart emoji is "visually heinous" and performative, signaling you vaguely care about privacy while still posting for clout. Kareem agrees wholeheartedly, comparing it to people who announce they don't own a TV or say they "went to school in Boston." The conversation gets funny when they discuss parents who suddenly reveal their kid's face at an arbitrary age, as if a three-year-old consented to being online. The real kicker? When that brand deal arrives. They joke about needing $150K or $250K to show the baby's face because "that pays for the whole college days." The solution is simple: use close friends lists, text messages, or don't post at all. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BlC9sCJZ-KA https://www.youtube.com/embed/BlC9sCJZ-KA 128 2025-11-08T18:50:32.000Z 653662 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/mo-amer-close-your-window-shade-on-midday-flights-feat-mo-amer 2026-04-15T06:46:09.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/x_ef7V81Rzs/maxresdefault.jpg Close your window shade on midday flights. Feat Mo Amer Mo Amer has a bone to pick with inconsiderate flyers who leave their window shades open on midday flights. The comedian and Kareem bond over this shared pet peeve, with Amer declaring that anyone guilty of this offense "should lose all flight privileges." He's willing to grant a grace period until cruising altitude for takeoff viewing, but after that? You're just being thoughtless. The conversation spirals into the horrors of screen glare, with Kareem lamenting his inability to watch Lawrence of Arabia in peace. Amer admits he's personally closed other passengers' windows, even when they're awake, claiming he gets a "rousing standing ovation" from grateful fellow travelers. The riff eventually veers into airplane safety theater, with Amer confessing he hasn't worn a seatbelt on planes in years because flight attendants don't actually check. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x_ef7V81Rzs https://www.youtube.com/embed/x_ef7V81Rzs 124 2025-11-07T14:44:43.000Z 484482 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/men-should-have-to-take-government-mandated-yearly-dance-classes 2026-04-15T06:46:16.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/9iJHdKkQVcc/maxresdefault.jpg Men should have to take government mandated yearly dance classes There's no such thing as a bad dancer," declares a woman on the subway who believes men should take government-mandated yearly dance classes to earn basic rights like voting and bar entry. It's reverse Footloose. Kareem pushes back, claiming he's got "that boogie" and shouldn't need lessons. But she's adamant: dancing men create a safer society, channeling violence into choreography. You could test out with an AP dance exam at 16, like getting a driver's license. The conversation spirals from the worm (don't do it on the train) to whether dance class should be run like the DMV or IRS. She's a self-proclaimed great dancer who chops the rug in half. He admits he's never taken a lesson but might start, inspired by CIA music video choreography. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9iJHdKkQVcc https://www.youtube.com/embed/9iJHdKkQVcc 135 2025-11-06T15:26:57.000Z 969559 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/spike-lee-says-stop-doing-this 2026-04-15T06:46:20.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/Mn1nt00BRHc/maxresdefault.jpg Spike Lee Says Stop Doing This Spike Lee has strong opinions about fashion crimes plaguing New York streets. Riding the G train into Brooklyn, the legendary director tells Kareem his biggest pet peeve is people leaving stickers on their fitted caps, both the big silver one on the bill and the ones underneath. "It's out of control," he says. The conversation turns to vertical video, which Lee despises just as much. When Kareem suggests a vertical movie theater screen, Lee shuts it down with three drawn-out words: "Nah." He can't imagine watching Lawrence of Arabia or any classic film in that format. Some traditions matter. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Mn1nt00BRHc https://www.youtube.com/embed/Mn1nt00BRHc 108 2025-11-05T20:52:23.000Z 226404 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/not-hurting-peoples-feelings-should-not-be-the-basis-for-morality 2026-04-15T06:46:27.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/fYNi0zGEaxQ/maxresdefault.jpg Not hurting people's feelings should not be the basis for morality A straphanger on the subway argues that not hurting people's feelings shouldn't be the basis for morality, insisting that withholding truth is "infantilizing and paternalistic." Kareem disagrees at first but hears her out. She wants honest feedback, even about her all-black outfit, which Kareem calls lazy. She doesn't care. The conversation gets spicy when she claims giving girls flowers is lame and uncreative, usually meaning you're cheating. Her alternative? A handwritten love letter that's actually personal. They also bond over hating jackhammers and New York's deafeningly loud subway system, agreeing it's worse than every other city's transit. Kareem ends by calling her sexy. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fYNi0zGEaxQ https://www.youtube.com/embed/fYNi0zGEaxQ 127 2025-11-05T17:10:41.000Z 1405924 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/spike-lee-told-me-i-watch-movies-wrong 2026-04-15T06:46:44.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/ghi1n_RkOb0/maxresdefault.jpg Spike Lee Told Me I Watch Movies Wrong Spike Lee schools Kareem Rahma on everything from New York City rats the size of cats to the cardinal sin of leaving stickers on baseball caps. The director sounds off on vertical video (his three-word verdict: "Nah"), explains why courtside Knicks seats are his form of relaxation, and reveals that only Denzel Washington gets to improvise in his films. Lee's made 21 feature films over 40 years, not 30. He corrects Kareem's math with a grin. The conversation careens from A$AP Rocky's heavyweight performance opposite Denzel in *High and Low* to why *On the Waterfront* remains his number one movie of all time. Lee's advice to aspiring filmmakers? "You got to bust your ass. And with those who speak Spanish, you got to bust your culo." Kareem pitches a buddy comedy called *Old Man, Young Man*. Spike isn't having it. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ghi1n_RkOb0 https://www.youtube.com/embed/ghi1n_RkOb0 795 2025-11-05T14:15:06.000Z 114223 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/kids-dont-give-your-life-meaning-but-to-other-people-they-give-your-life-meaning 2026-04-15T06:46:50.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/6Vpial1UbEs/maxresdefault.jpg Kids don’t give your life meaning, but to other people they give your life meaning A rider argues that kids don't give your life meaning, but they sure make you look good to other people. Kareem, who has a kid, pushes back hard at first but then flips to total agreement. The conversation spirals through hostage movie clichés ("I have kids!"), how millennials treat parenting like a hobby compared to their parents' generation, and the idea that follower counts might replace "beloved father" on tombstones. Things get dark when the rider recalls his dad getting pulled over for drunk driving and using his kids as an excuse. They were in the car. The whole episode is a riff on performative parenthood, how previous generations were obsessed with their children in ways that feel alien now, and what actually gives life meaning when rock climbing and matcha lattes are equally valid options. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6Vpial1UbEs https://www.youtube.com/embed/6Vpial1UbEs 118 2025-11-04T14:46:32.000Z 2332972 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/we-need-to-destroy-the-data-centers-and-start-over-from-a-pre-internet-era-marcr 2026-04-15T06:46:57.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/9i4VPn0RLzM/maxresdefault.jpg We need to destroy the data centers and start over from a pre internet era. ​⁠@MarcRebillet A rider makes the case for electromagnetic weapons targeting every data center in America to force a hard reset back to the pre-internet era. He's dead serious. Kareem agrees, and so does a bystander who jumps in to support the idea that we peaked somewhere around GeoCities and landlines. The conversation spirals through ChatGPT's weirdly utopian vision of post-data-center life, the golden age of the internet when people made their own pages and weren't just doom-scrolling through apps, and nostalgic memories of early online experiences that were strange but genuine. The rider even admits he asked ChatGPT what destroying all infrastructure would look like, and the AI basically said it'd be painful but worth it. They joke about the guy looking like he'd lead the revolution. The vibe is half-joking, half-yearning for when hanging out meant actually hanging out. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9i4VPn0RLzM https://www.youtube.com/embed/9i4VPn0RLzM 151 2025-11-03T14:55:56.000Z 2279617 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/marathons-are-overrated-brooksrunning 2026-04-15T06:47:04.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/evHjROhPXow/maxresdefault.jpg Marathons are overrated. ​⁠@brooksrunning A marathon runner who's won Boston and completed around 30 races total thinks marathons get too much hype. The stranger argues that 5Ks deserve equal respect, criticizing how people say "I'm only running the 5K" with shame at the New York City Expo. Kareem counters that marathons are "fairly rated" before the conversation takes a sharp turn into whether anyone would soil themselves mid-race for a better time. The runner draws the line there. Kareem doesn't. He admits he'd never win anyway but would "make sure I do poop and pee" for a personal record, at least until his guest explains it wouldn't be "a nugget, it's a spray." That changes his mind fast. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=evHjROhPXow https://www.youtube.com/embed/evHjROhPXow 139 2025-11-02T17:19:51.000Z 612721 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/just-because-youre-broken-up-doesnt-mean-its-over 2026-04-15T06:47:10.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/pxZ_k9ZkTkg/maxresdefault.jpg Just because you're broken up doesn't mean it's over Just because you're broken up doesn't mean it's over. A subway rider shares their take on second-chance romance with Kareem, who reveals he lived out this exact philosophy in his own life. He once pulled a grand romantic gesture to win back his now-wife after she told him "I'm over you." They're happily married with a baby. The conversation turns practical: if you want someone back, go no contact for a year, then create a climax moment. Sign up for the New York City Marathon, get jacked, maybe rent out the opera. Distance makes the heart grow fonder. Both agree that sometimes you need that third-act redemption period where Coldplay plays and you realize your life was better with them. The key? Look them in the eyes and prove you're different this time. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pxZ_k9ZkTkg https://www.youtube.com/embed/pxZ_k9ZkTkg 133 2025-11-01T14:30:08.000Z 477118 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/parents-have-a-favorite-kid 2026-04-15T06:47:16.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/DCjp2CyNzOs/maxresdefault.jpg Parents have a favorite kid Parents absolutely have a favorite kid, and this straphanger thinks we should stop pretending otherwise. He's convinced he's his mom's favorite while his older brother has claimed their dad's affection, which he accepts with surprising calm. "You're their second favorite person in the world," he tells Kareem, arguing that being number two doesn't make you unloved. The guest admits his brother is "cooler, handsomer" and has more parental rizz, but he's slowly winning his mom over by calling her daily to ask about her knee. His closing message to his dad is simple: "I love you. You're my favorite dad." Unless Paul McCartney turns out to be his real father. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DCjp2CyNzOs https://www.youtube.com/embed/DCjp2CyNzOs 131 2025-10-31T14:56:47.000Z 1142876 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/we-know-too-many-people-alisoneroman 2026-04-15T06:47:21.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/A5iMUGRBm58/maxresdefault.jpg We know too many people. ​⁠@alisoneroman A straphanger drops a modern truth bomb: we know too many people. She follows 2,400 accounts on Instagram, mostly furniture brands and vintage shops, but admits her brain is still overwhelmed by strangers' morning routines. Kareem agrees, though he thinks the problem is knowing too many people in real life rather than online. The conversation spirals into the absurdity of keeping up with acquaintances' Italy trips and whether we should adopt a "no new friends" policy. The rider insists there's no real solution except collective awareness. Maybe we should stop going to dinner with new people and call an old friend instead. Both agree: we know too many people. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=A5iMUGRBm58 https://www.youtube.com/embed/A5iMUGRBm58 115 2025-10-30T14:38:31.000Z 380109 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/take-the-sticker-off-your-hat-advice-of-an-icon-feat-spike-lee-and-timberland 2026-04-15T06:47:26.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/us10ycUdA80/maxresdefault.jpg Take the sticker off your hat. Advice of an Icon feat. Spike Lee and ​⁠@timberland A stranger on the G train has strong opinions about hat etiquette. He's baffled that people still leave the stickers on their caps, calling it "straight up ghetto." The conversation spirals from price tags left on cars to vertical video, where Kareem poses a hypothetical about vertical movie theaters. The rider shuts it down immediately. "Let me give you a three-word answer," he says. "Nah." He stretches it out for emphasis. It's classic New York crankiness about keeping things the right way, whether it's headwear or how you watch Lawrence of Arabia. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=us10ycUdA80 https://www.youtube.com/embed/us10ycUdA80 108 2025-10-29T18:34:55.000Z 504034 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/ira-glass-explains-why-im-listening-to-podcasts-wrong 2026-04-15T06:47:42.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/Fpv7goPGy5o/maxresdefault.jpg Ira Glass Explains Why I’m Listening to Podcasts Wrong Ira Glass, the legendary host of This American Life, defends listening to podcasts at 2x speed while Kareem argues it's like fast-forwarding through a meal. The debate gets heated. Glass insists Michael Barbaro "sounds like he's talking at normal pacing" when sped up, while Kareem can't believe someone who's produced an hour of audio every week for 30 years would approve of people literally fast-forwarding through his work. They also clash over subway etiquette: Glass thinks phones exist for enjoyment, but Kareem stopped using his on the train because people kept photographing him looking "disgusting" while scrolling. He now just sits and stares. Glass is baffled. The conversation shifts to This American Life's evolution from radio to podcasting, which doubled their audience from two million listeners, and Glass reveals the constant anxiety of producing weekly content. "Any minute of the day I was either working or asleep," he remembers from the early days. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Fpv7goPGy5o https://www.youtube.com/embed/Fpv7goPGy5o 883 2025-10-29T13:15:01.000Z 64028 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/say-yes-90-of-the-time 2026-04-15T06:47:48.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/BlQfWIU34nA/maxresdefault.jpg Say yes 90% of the time A straphanger with a wildly optimistic worldview shares his philosophy: say yes 90% of the time. It's led him to sing in a National Opera Company (he demonstrates with a scream), teach public school, and perform in a Broadway show. When Kareem pushes back on the negativity of saying no, the rider doubles down, arguing that too much negativity floats around already, especially from the news cycle. His sunny disposition traces back to being adopted at birth. His mom told him he was special, that they chose him. Now he's got a 30-year-old daughter and 27-year-old son, and Kelsey's getting married in a couple weeks. His parting advice? Get off your phone and touch some grass. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BlQfWIU34nA https://www.youtube.com/embed/BlQfWIU34nA 109 2025-10-28T13:56:12.000Z 858687 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/i-dont-think-men-should-be-gynecologists 2026-04-15T06:47:54.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/U19WJeZ45P8/maxresdefault.jpg I don't think men should be gynecologists A woman on the subway argues that men shouldn't be gynecologists, calling it "a bit performative" that male doctors choose to specialize in the one body part they don't have. Kareem agrees. The conversation escalates quickly. Why would a 15-year-old boy decide he wants to be a gynecologist? The guest says she'd tell her son to do surgery instead, something more with his life. Then things get wild. She declares that every podiatrist is a pervert because "no one's passionate about feet unless they want to suck on toes." Kareem calls it a hot take. The rider isn't backing down though, insisting that if someone's becoming a foot doctor, it's not about helping people with pain when there are so many other ways to help. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=U19WJeZ45P8 https://www.youtube.com/embed/U19WJeZ45P8 114 2025-10-27T14:41:14.000Z 147704 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/i-think-we-should-bring-back-myspace-top-eight 2026-04-15T06:47:59.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/VZt2ilExOxU/maxresdefault.jpg I think we should bring back MySpace top eight A straphanger makes the case for resurrecting MySpace's top eight feature, arguing it would actually reduce social drama rather than create it. His logic? We're already ranking friends constantly through wedding invites, birthday parties, and text response times. "Your wedding is like your MySpace top 100," he points out. Kareem initially balks at the chaos this would unleash, but the rider insists people are already being passive aggressive about friendships anyway. Better to be transparent about it. The conversation spirals into nostalgia for MySpace's gloriously messy aesthetic, complete with pink leopard print backgrounds and auto-playing Jeffree Star songs. Modern social media feels sanitized and corporate while people still act nasty to each other. Bring back the mess. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VZt2ilExOxU https://www.youtube.com/embed/VZt2ilExOxU 123 2025-10-26T13:43:10.000Z 305248 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/music-beefs-theyre-wonderful-things-and-they-should-be-encouraged 2026-04-15T06:48:04.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/27jMuH9Ue_4/maxresdefault.jpg Music beefs, they're wonderful things and they should be encouraged A straphanger has a controversial opinion: music beefs are wonderful things and should be encouraged. He argues that feuds like Beatles versus Stones and Oasis versus Blur created the best eras for fans, and there's an untapped market for this kind of drama beyond rap. His advice to small artists? Take a shot at somebody. Might boost your profile. When asked about fake beefs, he's fine with them ("it's like sports"), though he admits he'd need to call a timeout if someone actually died. Kareem catches the energy and playfully declares war on Jimmy Fallon, claiming he's the real talk show host now. Then he immediately backtracks: "Actually, that would be nice of you, Fallon. Let me come be a guest on your show." The rider leaves him with some wisdom: let your haters be your waiters at the table of success. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=27jMuH9Ue_4 https://www.youtube.com/embed/27jMuH9Ue_4 99 2025-10-25T15:51:18.000Z 274733 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/everyone-on-earth-has-to-be-poor-for-5-years 2026-04-15T06:48:12.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/zjiGo0uWBjU/maxresdefault.jpg Everyone on earth has to be poor for 5 years A subway rider proposes that everyone on Earth should experience poverty for five mandatory years to build empathy. Not consecutively, but spread across a lifetime. The idea is simple: rich people need to feel what it's like when your card gets declined at the grocery store, when you can't give your kid something they want, when you're drowning in unemployment paperwork. Kareem loves it. Both host and rider have been there, negative bank accounts and all. They immediately form a committee to work out logistics. When does it start? Age 18. What if you're already born poor? Exemption granted. The conversation gets granular fast, mapping out poverty years at 18, 27, and 40, with a bonus two-year stretch if you have kids that counts toward their requirement. It's basically mandatory Peace Corps service, or as Kareem puts it, "like Ramadan" but you can still drink. The whole thing is absurd yet oddly compelling, two people genuinely workshopping a system to force empathy on the wealthy. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zjiGo0uWBjU https://www.youtube.com/embed/zjiGo0uWBjU 121 2025-10-24T14:05:49.000Z 515173 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/its-not-weird-to-like-peoples-old-photos-xfinity 2026-04-15T06:48:17.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/PsSI6lp06UI/maxresdefault.jpg It's not weird to like people's old photos. ​⁠@xfinity A visiting tourist who looks like he "lives in Bushwick" debates the etiquette of liking old Instagram photos with Kareem. The stranger thinks scrolling back to 2017 is creepy. Kareem admits he used to drop "like bombs" on girls he was flirting with, going all the way back to their first upload. Intent matters, they agree. The visitor's still confused about soup dumplings from Chinatown and wants to find that bakery from the show with four women drinking cosmopolitans. He pushes back when Kareem claims to be the main character of Sex and the City. Manhattan holds that title. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PsSI6lp06UI https://www.youtube.com/embed/PsSI6lp06UI 127 2025-10-23T22:00:56.000Z 2288714 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/all-straight-men-not-only-do-they-love-drag-but-they-do-their-own-versions-of-it 2026-04-15T06:48:23.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/yAmQPs6j2nY/maxresdefault.jpg All straight men, not only do they love drag, but they do their own versions of it A straphanger in full costume delivers a fiery argument that all straight men already love drag, they just call it something else. Pro wrestling? Drag with entrances and outfit reveals. Halloween? Drag for cowards. Rock concerts are drag with guitars, anime conventions are drag with subtitles, and "artsy Brooklyn men" are doing drag for trust fund babies cosplaying as the working poor. The stranger, dressed in what he calls his work drag persona, pushes back when Kareem suggests he's performing masculinity, insisting he IS masculinity. Good masculinity is good drag. He reflects on growing up playing sports in tight pants while fans wore face paint and dressed as players, realizing the drag fandom was always there. The real problem isn't drag itself but the hypocrisy of straight men who love it yet roll their eyes at drag queens. By the end, he offers to put Kareem in drag. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yAmQPs6j2nY https://www.youtube.com/embed/yAmQPs6j2nY 117 2025-10-22T17:01:55.000Z 141113 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/the-8-hottest-takes-on-new-york-city 2026-04-15T06:48:32.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/uYX7yxV-ypA/maxresdefault.jpg The 8 Hottest Takes on New York City Bring it back to the old New York, man. Fuck these bike lanes." A compilation episode features eight spicy takes about living in NYC, ranging from the unhinged to the uncomfortably true. One rider argues you can only be a New Yorker if you're born here, leaving Kareem (born in Egypt, raised in Minnesota) permanently "suspect" despite 13 years in the city. Another guest breaks down how Eric Adams has raised rent by 9%, approved a $70 monthly Con Ed increase, and made water bills $9 more expensive, all while restricting halal cart permits so severely that vendors pay $18K on the black market for licenses. The consensus? Everyone here either has rich parents or sells drugs, because how else do you afford $4,200 rent for a one-bedroom? Dark web handicap placards, PBA cards, and hopping turnstiles come up as survival strategies. It's chaotic, profane, and feels like eavesdropping on the angriest group chat in all five boroughs. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uYX7yxV-ypA https://www.youtube.com/embed/uYX7yxV-ypA 863 2025-10-22T14:15:15.000Z 254146 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/we-should-blow-up-our-lives-more 2026-04-15T04:43:34.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/mGiMSruZoyg/maxresdefault.jpg We should blow up our lives more A millennial guest makes the case that people should completely blow up their lives way more often instead of just staying comfortable. They're talking about ditching jobs, relationships, and cities when things feel stale. The take is basically that we're all too scared of change. Pretty bold stuff for a subway conversation about starting over. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mGiMSruZoyg https://www.youtube.com/embed/mGiMSruZoyg 121 2025-10-21T14:19:53.000Z 852844 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/the-united-states-should-bring-back-the-conscription-but-for-restaurant-jobs 2026-04-15T06:48:44.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/Q3cUJmBO-Tg/maxresdefault.jpg The United States should bring back the conscription, but for restaurant jobs A straphanger pitches mandatory restaurant conscription for all Americans aged 16 to 20, arguing that service industry work builds empathy, work ethic, and proper morals. Picture this: you're drafted as an Olive Garden dishwasher, befriend a 68-year-old waitress named Deborah who teaches you "light tax fraud," then fall for a manic pixie dream girl hostess while working as a barback. Kareem bonds with the rider over their own formative restaurant jobs. McDonald's at $5.05 an hour. The Wing as a dishwasher. They agree on universal truths: always split bills evenly, the birthday person never pays, and anyone who hasn't cried in a walk-in freezer shouldn't vote. The rider's hot take? No equal rights without service industry experience. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Q3cUJmBO-Tg https://www.youtube.com/embed/Q3cUJmBO-Tg 129 2025-10-20T14:28:09.000Z 789814 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/trader-joes-is-a-horrible-grocery-store-and-we-should-stop-hyping-it 2026-04-15T06:48:51.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/oWvyPTNsCeI/maxresdefault.jpg Trader Joe's is a horrible grocery store, and we should stop hyping it Who the fuck is Ming?" A straphanger launches into a passionate takedown of Trader Joe's, arguing that grocery stores shouldn't require a learning curve when shoppers just want familiar brands like Oreos instead of confusing knockoffs like "Trader Ming" orange chicken. Kareem pushes back hard, defending the chain's unique offerings like Korean bulgogi and frozen fried rice. The conversation spirals into Costco territory, where the rider suggests "Single Co" for people who don't need four bottles of Heinz ketchup. His complaint? You have to consult Reddit tier lists just to figure out which Trader Joe's bread to buy. Kareem isn't buying it. The debate becomes a clash between brand loyalty and adventurous grocery shopping, with "consumer trust" becoming an unlikely rallying cry that leaves Kareem visibly shook. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oWvyPTNsCeI https://www.youtube.com/embed/oWvyPTNsCeI 121 2025-10-19T14:07:01.000Z 1409654 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/lukas-gage-sox-should-only-be-a-nighttime-activity-feat-lukas-gage 2026-04-15T06:48:56.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/xmBStVys8Ao/maxresdefault.jpg Sox should only be a nighttime activity. Feat Lukas Gage Lukas Gage has a firm stance: sex should only be a nighttime activity. Maybe midday is acceptable, but mornings? Absolutely not. Kareem pushes back hard, arguing he's "ready to go" in the mornings while nighttime requires getting "fluffed." Lukas isn't budging. Morning lighting is horrible, you smell bad, and who has that much time during the day anyway? He takes a bath before every encounter. Every time. Even if an attractive person propositioned him at 11 a.m., he'd politely ask to "revisit this at 11 p.m." The debate gets specific about physical readiness, work schedules, and personal hygiene routines, with Lukas insisting that nighttime sex is for people who actually have energy. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xmBStVys8Ao https://www.youtube.com/embed/xmBStVys8Ao 94 2025-10-18T13:44:58.000Z 271713 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/we-should-gossip-more 2026-04-15T06:49:04.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/sC3xkbLkvr8/maxresdefault.jpg We should gossip more Gossip builds trust, according to a straphanger who challenges Kareem's skepticism with an unexpected defense of what's usually considered trashy talk. She traces the word's etymology back to women gathering to discuss scripture and home life, arguing it was always a defense network where women warned each other about dangerous men. Kareem resists. He thinks gossip means saying "Becky's a dumb" something or other, not sharing useful information like restaurant food poisoning warnings. But his conversation partner insists that word-of-mouth transfer, whether it's about salaries or Signal messages, counts as gossip, and civilization was built on it. The debate gets tangled in definitions, with Kareem admitting he has no idea what she's saying when she talks about attaching to historical lore to validate lived experience. She won't back down though. More gossip means better negotiations, safer streets, and smarter choices. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sC3xkbLkvr8 https://www.youtube.com/embed/sC3xkbLkvr8 123 2025-10-17T14:54:10.000Z 636154 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/ira-glass-every-podcast-is-better-at-20-speed-feat-ira-glass-and-apple-podcasts 2026-04-15T06:49:10.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/5vd-4Eqbgcs/maxresdefault.jpg Every podcast is better at 2.0 speed! Feat Ira Glass and Apple Podcasts Ira Glass thinks speeding up podcasts is the equivalent of saying "I'm going to fast forward through this." Kareem disagrees. He argues that Michael Barbaro "sounds like he's talking at normal pacing" at 2.0 speed, and even The Daily's music is better sped up. Glass pushes back as someone who's created an hour of content every week for 30 years. The conversation spirals into Glass's subway habits: he doesn't use his phone on the train out of vanity, worried about unflattering photos people might take of him hunched over his screen. He also fears getting robbed or punched. Kareem points out the absurdity. Everyone's on their phones except the one guy stealing them. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5vd-4Eqbgcs https://www.youtube.com/embed/5vd-4Eqbgcs 120 2025-10-16T17:41:56.000Z 366840 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/jason-bateman-dogs-should-have-to-wear-shoes-feat-jason-batemen-full-video-below 2026-04-15T06:49:16.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/xPpZsPw5xok/maxresdefault.jpg Dogs should have to wear shoes. Feat Jason Batemen (Full Video below!) Jason Bateman thinks dogs should wear shoes, and he's got a whole germaphobe manifesto to back it up. The actor explains his disgust at dogs tracking sidewalk filth into homes, onto beds, and even pillows where humans drool. It gets worse. He won't touch subway rails, washes his hands before peeing (not after), and uses paper towels to turn off faucets so he doesn't re-contaminate clean hands. "App wax" on subway benches? Don't even get him started. Kareem pushes back on the head grease paranoia, but Bateman's committed to his take, even if his two house dogs don't actually wear shoes. The kicker: he thinks dog shoes would be affordable, like "little condoms" for paws. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xPpZsPw5xok https://www.youtube.com/embed/xPpZsPw5xok 133 2025-10-16T14:12:47.000Z 720301 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/jason-bateman-explains-why-im-doing-life-wrong 2026-04-15T06:49:31.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/t9q-A6iFIOs/maxresdefault.jpg Jason Bateman Explains Why I’m Doing Life Wrong Jason Bateman thinks dogs should wear shoes. The actor and SmartLess podcast host sits down with Kareem Rahma to discuss his germaphobia, which runs deep enough that he refuses to touch subway railings or let his day clothes touch his bed sheets. "These pants are dead to me now," he says about sitting on the train. The conversation veers from his 25 years without alcohol (he prefers "alcohol-free" to "sober") to why he didn't dance at his own wedding, a choice rooted in fourth-grade trauma when a girlfriend walked off the dance floor. Bateman admits he's an introvert who gets "very quiet and very moody" when he needs to recharge. He doesn't understand dancing. He washes his hands before peeing, not after. And yes, he'd do a Happy Days reboot as Richie Cunningham, though Kareem insists Bateman's really just the Fonz. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=t9q-A6iFIOs https://www.youtube.com/embed/t9q-A6iFIOs 891 2025-10-15T13:15:14.000Z 293577 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/baking-is-easy 2026-04-15T06:49:38.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/lKZYVvE60gw/maxresdefault.jpg Baking is easy Baking is easy, a straphanger declares, setting off a passionate debate about culinary technique and American measurement systems. Kareem's rider insists baking is actually straightforward because you get all the answers upfront: exact temperatures, precise times, clear instructions. The real problem? US recipes rely on volume measurements like cups and teaspoons instead of proper metric weights, setting beginners up to fail. Meanwhile, TikTok's condensed cooking videos aren't helping. The conversation takes a turn when Kareem admits he's never baked anything because everyone says it's too hard. Don't be manipulated by other people's fears, the rider counters. Baking is just a craft requiring basic techniques and repetition. And if you disagree? Come to the October 18th bake sale at WSA 180 Maiden Lane, where 100 chefs will raise money for four NYC nonprofits. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lKZYVvE60gw https://www.youtube.com/embed/lKZYVvE60gw 113 2025-10-14T14:13:46.000Z 463900 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/theres-too-much-pizza-in-new-york-city 2026-04-15T06:49:44.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/WdBvGpDeZqg/maxresdefault.jpg There's too much pizza in New York City A straphanger with strong opinions drops a controversial claim: there's too much pizza in New York City. Kareem pushes back immediately. The stranger, who eats around 16 slices a week and holds the Guinness World Record for the largest collection of pizza boxes with 2,000 of them, clarifies his real beef. It's not the quantity. It's the quality. Out of 1,500 pizzerias listed on the Department of Health website, only 80 to 100 are worth visiting, and tourists keep wandering into mediocre Midtown spots that are designed for 2:00 in the morning sustenance, not first impressions. They discuss ranch as a red flag for bad pizza, Chicago deep dish as categorically not pizza, and Detroit style as easy to photograph but hard to perfect. The verdict: if you need ranch, the pizza wasn't good to begin with. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WdBvGpDeZqg https://www.youtube.com/embed/WdBvGpDeZqg 127 2025-10-13T14:27:41.000Z 2336746 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/the-future-is-disabled 2026-04-15T06:49:50.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/LECzHFumFJ8/maxresdefault.jpg The future is disabled A rider in Prada shoes delivers a bold proclamation: "the future is disabled." Their logic? As technology like AI, self-driving cars, and Neuralink advance, able-bodied people are increasingly living like disabled people already do, while disabled people gain superhuman capabilities through adaptive tech. Kareem rates himself a nine out of ten on the disability scale. The conversation turns playful as the rider pitches disabled life as aspirational, comparing it to being a "modern day princess" with people feeding you, dressing you, and driving you around. They insist able-bodied people need mentorship from disabled folks to prepare for this future. Kareem's interested. He wants in on the cool wheelchair and the swag that apparently comes standard. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LECzHFumFJ8 https://www.youtube.com/embed/LECzHFumFJ8 121 2025-10-11T18:04:32.000Z 143040 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/cilantro-tastes-like-soap-and-thats-why-its-good 2026-04-15T06:49:57.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/KjgnxYMpT7g/maxresdefault.jpg Cilantro tastes like soap, and that's why it's good Cilantro tastes like soap and that's why it's good." That's the hot take from a subway rider who defends the controversial herb by listing soap's supposedly delicious ingredients: fat, milk, oatmeal, herbs, and flowers. Kareem isn't buying it. The conversation spirals into whether everyone's accidentally eaten decorative soap that looks like candy (Kareem says no, his bandmate insists yes) before revealing the twist: this passionate cilantro defender is actually in Kareem's band. They've got a new single out called "Time to Bleed," which gets an impromptu performance on the train. The whole thing is absurd, funny, and exactly the kind of chaotic energy you'd expect from bandmates arguing about soapy vegetables underground. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KjgnxYMpT7g https://www.youtube.com/embed/KjgnxYMpT7g 92 2025-10-10T14:42:22.000Z 407013 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/to-truly-love-new-york-you-must-hate-new-york 2026-04-15T06:50:04.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/WlU_VE78gfA/maxresdefault.jpg To truly love New York, you must hate New York To truly love New York, you must hate New York." A lifelong New Yorker drops this paradox on Kareem, who's been in the city for 14 years but still gets called a transplant in the comments. The conversation swings between complaints (lugging luggage, $800 everything, grocery runs that suck) and fierce loyalty. They debate the sacred ten-year rule for earning New Yorker status. The rider's take? It's a mindset, not a time requirement. You could feel it in three days. But there's a catch: you can't claim it if your dad pays $8,000 a month for your West Village apartment and you've never struggled. Real New York credibility comes from going negative on your bank account for an Alphabet City security deposit. The struggle feeds the art. That's why the city's the greatest, even when you hate it. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WlU_VE78gfA https://www.youtube.com/embed/WlU_VE78gfA 118 2025-10-09T19:04:39.000Z 1448252 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/you-should-only-read-reviews-after-you-have-experienced-the-thing 2026-04-15T06:50:13.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/9fLd1bBKc2k/maxresdefault.jpg You should only read reviews after you have experienced the thing A straphanger argues that reviews should only be read after you've experienced something yourself. Her reasoning? Pre-reading other people's takes taints your experience and makes everyone respond the same way. Kareem pushes back hard, defending his right to check reviews before dropping money on a bad movie. The rider doubles down: she doesn't even watch trailers and wishes her friends would stop telling her about things she's about to see. She wants reviews to function like support groups where people connect after experiencing something, not before. "I don't know who I am afterwards," she says about consuming reviews beforehand. It's a surprisingly earnest plea for protecting authentic first impressions in an age where everything gets pre-filtered through someone else's opinion. Kareem concedes maybe art deserves this treatment. Maybe. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9fLd1bBKc2k https://www.youtube.com/embed/9fLd1bBKc2k 114 2025-10-08T16:23:40.000Z 398518 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/ethan-hawke-there-is-no-such-thing-as-your-favorite-beatle-feat-ethan-hawke 2026-04-15T06:50:18.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/uhKXyIcbupg/maxresdefault.jpg There is no such thing as your favorite Beatle. Feat Ethan Hawke Ethan Hawke has a bold take: there's no such thing as a favorite Beatle. When Kareem pushes back, insisting Lennon's the best, Hawke argues the Beatles' magic came entirely from their chemistry as a unit. He spins an elaborate metaphor: Ringo gets the party started, George asks why we're born and why we die, Lennon takes the piss out of George, and Paul redirects everyone to make music. The beauty? These four lads from Liverpool, "a hole," achieved greatness through humility. Paul McCartney sang backup on "All You Need Is Love." John Lennon played rhythm guitar on "Hey Jude." They believed in each other, took care of each other, and changed the world. That's the real message of the Beatles. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uhKXyIcbupg https://www.youtube.com/embed/uhKXyIcbupg 125 2025-10-08T13:35:01.000Z 1476902 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/ethan-hawke-15-minutes-of-ethan-hawke-dropping-gems-on-a-subway 2026-04-15T06:50:28.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/mmmVUOsubbs/maxresdefault.jpg 15 Minutes of Ethan Hawke Dropping Gems on a Subway Ethan Hawke once got arrested for jumping a subway turnstile and shoved into a closet with strangers. Now he's back underground with Kareem, this time dropping wisdom about art, ego, and the ticking clock of mortality. The actor refuses to pick a favorite Beatle because "it's like saying I have a favorite ventricle of my heart," arguing their humility made them great. He explains why chasing cash ruins creativity, why he didn't get paid for Boyhood despite a 13-year commitment, and why a 22-year-old talking about Before Sunrise in 2025 matters more than any Oscar. Fame? A trap. The real goal is becoming the old man your younger self would respect, like Bob Dylan at 80-something, integrity intact and voice still his own. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mmmVUOsubbs https://www.youtube.com/embed/mmmVUOsubbs 934 2025-10-08T13:15:14.000Z 326735 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/women-need-to-use-men-more 2026-04-15T06:50:33.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/JLBYMnAg8sw/maxresdefault.jpg Women need to use men more A woman on the subway drops a provocative take: women need to use men more. She's not just talking about opening jars. She argues that in Islam, husbands must pay all their wives' bills, backing her claim with religious authority while Kareem learns something new about the Quran. The conversation spirals from 50/50 dating splits to "reparations" for women in a sexist society. Things get spicy when she reveals her second take: married women should keep secret bank accounts from their husbands. Kareem's companion calls her toxic. She insists she's actually the pious one, though her philosophy of strategic financial privacy suggests otherwise. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JLBYMnAg8sw https://www.youtube.com/embed/JLBYMnAg8sw 136 2025-10-07T14:08:55.000Z 392718 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/you-shouldnt-be-turning-on-subtitles-when-youre-watching-movies 2026-04-15T06:50:39.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/BalBnLTEGvE/maxresdefault.jpg You shouldn't be turning on subtitles when you're watching movies A straphanger rails against subtitles with the passion of a film purist: they disrespect the cinematographer's craft, forcing viewers to stare at "the lower 5% of the screen" instead of soaking in those perfect beach shots someone spent years training to capture. Kareem pushes back hard. He's pro-subtitles all the way, insisting that once you become a "subtitle head," you don't even notice them anymore. They provide comfort, catch every word, and work just fine for serious cinema like Phantom Thread, not just Love Island. The rider isn't buying it, suggesting subtitle users are just compensating for poor listening skills or TikTok-fried attention spans. "People who use subtitles don't even read books," he claims, arguing viewers should "lock in" and feel part of the film instead of breaking the fourth wall. Kareem's verdict? Throw those "mfers on. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BalBnLTEGvE https://www.youtube.com/embed/BalBnLTEGvE 102 2025-10-05T16:08:32.000Z 461762 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/we-should-bring-back-arranged-marriages 2026-04-15T06:50:46.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/VMVHD-HJpYo/maxresdefault.jpg We should bring back arranged marriages We should bring back arranged marriages," a straphanger tells Kareem, and the conversation quickly spirals into a surprisingly data-driven defense of ditching love-based matchmaking. The rider points out that 50% of modern marriages end in divorce compared to just 4% of arranged marriages, arguing that shared values beat romance every time. Kareem and his companion riff on the paradox of choice, comparing online dating to a Costco filled with hoes (their words). The straphanger comes from an Indian family where her parents have been happily arranged for over 30 years, though she admits they're "useless" at finding her a match. The conversation takes a bizarre detour into Italian divorce law and cousin crushes before Kareem mercifully cuts it off. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VMVHD-HJpYo https://www.youtube.com/embed/VMVHD-HJpYo 127 2025-10-04T13:45:07.000Z 1021981 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/if-you-need-a-stylist-then-youre-not-stylish 2026-04-15T06:50:51.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/WrU0EYSNmlM/maxresdefault.jpg If you need a stylist, then you're not stylish A stylish stranger wearing python boots drops a bold declaration: if you need a stylist, you're not stylish. His own fashion awakening? Trying on Versace jeans in Florence as a teenager, black in the front and white in the back, which sparked his entire aesthetic transformation. He tells Kareem his inspirations range from 80s Sylvester Stallone and Miami Vice to 70s pimps, and he's hunting for platform boots with live goldfish swimming in the heels. The advice is simple. Develop your own style. Make it personal, don't copy everyone else, because there's too many sheep and not enough wolves. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WrU0EYSNmlM https://www.youtube.com/embed/WrU0EYSNmlM 110 2025-10-03T16:17:06.000Z 1743654 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/stop-being-mad-at-people-who-cut-the-line-and-do-it-yourself 2026-04-15T06:50:57.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/c_ZnFDKnJ-k/maxresdefault.jpg Stop being mad at people who cut the line and do it yourself A subway rider thinks you should stop complaining about line cutters and just cut the line yourself. At least after dark. Kareem pushes back hard on this take, insisting we need more order, not more chaos. The rider explains her philosophy: during the day she's polite at coffee shops, but nighttime events like the Ciza and Kronada afterparty require strategic cutting or you're not getting in. There are exceptions though. TSA? Too much light. Bathroom lines? That's extreme, even after Millie Bobby Brown cut her once. The final verdict establishes zones: clubs and donut shops are fair game for savages to cut away, but post offices, bathrooms, and anything important remain sacred. It's a surprisingly detailed code of conduct for someone who openly admits to being a cutter. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=c_ZnFDKnJ-k https://www.youtube.com/embed/c_ZnFDKnJ-k 95 2025-10-02T15:15:12.000Z 217533 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/stephen-a-smiths-worst-take 2026-04-15T06:51:11.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/mCdRt_sxd2Q/maxresdefault.jpg Stephen A. Smith’s Worst Take Stephen A. Smith defends brunch. The sports broadcaster tells Kareem he likes his waffles, his eggs, and his cheeseburgers, depending on the mood, though he denies ever ordering eggs Benedict despite what Page Six might say. He ranks the boroughs with Queens first (naturally), Brooklyn second, and refuses to put Staten Island above the Bronx because "I need to see some Black people in Staten Island." The First Take host predicts the Knicks will make the NBA Finals this year, their first since 1999. He's old school on hip-hop, repping Jay-Z, Nas, and LL Cool J over the young guys. When Kareem says he likes him a lot after ten minutes on the E train, Stephen A. refuses to return the compliment, though he concedes "we good. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mCdRt_sxd2Q https://www.youtube.com/embed/mCdRt_sxd2Q 319 2025-10-01T20:45:02.000Z 29237 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/everyone-should-have-to-put-their-s-x-tape-in-their-dating-profile 2026-04-15T06:51:18.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/eoKyuuuTHtk/maxresdefault.jpg Everyone should have to put their s_x tape in their dating profile A rider with extremely provocative dating takes declares that everyone should put their sex tape on their dating profile "so we know what everyone's real value is." Kareem is skeptical. The stranger elaborates with a bizarre rating system where a 10 in bed but a 2 in looks averages out to a 5, arguing you can't be jealous of the past and claiming he'd casually drop "I have that in my phone if you're interested" during dates. He admits he's actively looking. The conversation spirals through his willingness to share his own tape, old school missionary preferences, and increasingly wild backup takes including mandatory DNA testing for newborns to expose female infidelity rates. They finally agree on one thing: OnlyFans proves prostitution should be legal in America. Kareem crowns him the horniest person ever on the show. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eoKyuuuTHtk https://www.youtube.com/embed/eoKyuuuTHtk 112 2025-10-01T16:10:12.000Z 145792 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/bathroom-stalls-should-not-swing-inward-feat-annamlaughs 2026-04-15T06:51:24.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/upLQ24kPk7E/maxresdefault.jpg Bathroom stalls should not swing inward. Feat ​⁠@annamlaughs A straphanger delivers a passionate argument about bathroom stall doors: they should swing outward, not inward. The problem? When doors open into already cramped stalls, you're forced to squeeze around them, risking contact with toilet bowls and dirty walls that "never get clean." She frames it as a gender and disability issue, pointing out that "vagina owners" have to perform awkward maneuvers to avoid touching germy surfaces. Kareem agrees about the need for privacy, then pivots to his own bathroom gripe: urinals without proper dividers. The conversation takes a turn when he suggests doors should include a phone stand so people can watch TV while using the toilet. Her response? "I will not get it done." The broader point lands though: women and disabled people need seats at the urban planning table to fix these design failures. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=upLQ24kPk7E https://www.youtube.com/embed/upLQ24kPk7E 116 2025-09-30T14:33:48.000Z 612723 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/we-need-500000-for-2-of-our-egg-eatery 2026-04-15T06:51:31.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/R8m6pH-_Glg/maxresdefault.jpg We need $500,000 for 2% of our egg eatery Two strangers pitch Kareem on "New York City's only eggery" in a pitch that spirals into absurdist chaos. They claim "1 million eggs is eaten every 1 minute" and want $500,000 for just 2% equity in their restaurant concept that serves boiled eggs on the honor system. The duo floats a workaround for FDA red tape: running for governor to abolish the agency entirely. Their patent-pending 400g protein egg remains scientifically dubious, and when pressed on whether it's actually just a restaurant, one founder admits "Yeah" before backtracking. Kareem tries repeatedly to rein them in, but the pitch careens between Shark Tank parody and genuine bewilderment about chicken anatomy. It ends with a halfhearted egg sample and zero investment. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=R8m6pH-_Glg https://www.youtube.com/embed/R8m6pH-_Glg 132 2025-09-28T15:52:46.000Z 601696 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/life-is-short-is-a-completely-unhelpful-piece-of-advice 2026-04-15T06:51:36.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/GywD49oSPKI/maxresdefault.jpg "Life is short" is a completely unhelpful piece of advice Life is short" is completely unhelpful advice, according to one anonymous rider who's fed up with vague motivational content. The problem? It's not actionable. Life is short relative to what, exactly? And what are you supposed to do with that information: pursue your career more aggressively, spend time with loved ones, or just enjoy yourself? These directives contradict each other. When Kareem pushes back, asking why anyone needs to tell you what to do, the rider argues they're already wrestling with these questions constantly. Better advice would be "life is long." Relax. You've got plenty of time. Margaritaville. Speaking of which, they just ate at Margaritaville with their dad and uncle, and the fried chicken salad was actually amazing. Kareem delivers the kicker: Margaritaville is the definition of life is short. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GywD49oSPKI https://www.youtube.com/embed/GywD49oSPKI 106 2025-09-27T15:00:23.000Z 1178506 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/girls-who-look-like-their-dads-are-hot 2026-04-15T06:51:44.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/qEq_NkWAytk/maxresdefault.jpg Girls Who Look Like Their Dads Are Hot Ryan Roman has a spicy take: if a girl looks just like her dad, that's perfectly fine. He tells Kareem that guys who can't handle it are "weak in natural selection" and should have their lineage eliminated. The conversation spirals into whether this counts as a fetish (it doesn't), the gendered double standard around facial resemblance (why does nobody care when guys look like their moms?), and the awkwardness of staring into your girlfriend's eyes and recognizing her father's face. Roman points out you wouldn't even know unless you met the dad, and besides, sometimes the dad is hot too. They riff on potential names for the phenomenon, landing on "baddy daddy" for the father and "daddy baddy" for the daughter, though Roman worries about what the comments section will say about him and his tight shirts. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qEq_NkWAytk https://www.youtube.com/embed/qEq_NkWAytk 205 2025-09-26T13:15:15.000Z 23147 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/go-swimming-naked-or-not-at-all 2026-04-15T06:51:50.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/S4sXw77nFWU/maxresdefault.jpg Go swimming naked or not at all A European straphanger declares that swimming should be done naked or not at all, kicking off a surprisingly persuasive argument about nude recreation. She swims naked "almost all the time" and rattles off benefits: no soggy swimsuits fermenting in bags, less plastic waste, and weirdly, she's never been catcalled while naked but has been in a bathing suit. Speedos are sexual, but nakedness isn't, she insists. Kareem agrees in theory but admits he's a coward, though he did get naked once (just to use the restroom). The conversation spirals into why American movies keep bras on during sex scenes and how to say "penis" in German. It's the same in German. She offers to be his "nudity doula" for a lake trip. He's in, as long as nobody makes it weird. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=S4sXw77nFWU https://www.youtube.com/embed/S4sXw77nFWU 132 2025-09-25T13:44:41.000Z 267924 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/religious-people-are-lying-to-themselves 2026-04-15T06:51:58.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/UukNvACa34w/maxresdefault.jpg Religious People Are Lying to Themselves Comedian Jordan Jensen brings a scorching hot take to Kareem: nobody is actually religious. If people really believed in hell, she argues, they'd never shut up about it. "I quit eating sugar and told every single one of my friends. If I thought they were gonna burn in hell, I would be shaking them awake in the middle of the night." She admits her religious aunt texts her daily to accept Jesus, which proves the point. That's real belief. But casual believers? They're frauds. Jordan tears into modern faith as lifestyle cosplay, insisting true religion requires fundamentalist urgency. She even slept with a self-described Muslim and called him out mid-conversation. "Nobody [__] me who believes in Allah." Kareem pushes back but can't quite shake her logic. The exchange gets heated, hilarious, and uncomfortably honest about what conviction actually looks like. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UukNvACa34w https://www.youtube.com/embed/UukNvACa34w 317 2025-09-24T14:15:09.000Z 37651 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/the-new-york-knicks-should-never-win-a-championship 2026-04-15T06:52:07.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/OEQiG2DP2C8/maxresdefault.jpg The New York Knicks should never win a championship A stranger who claims he was "found in a shed in March" delivers one of the show's most bizarre arguments: the New York Knicks should never win a championship because the celebration would be too dangerous. He's dead serious. The rider, who identifies as "a ball for the people," warns that eight fatalities followed the Pistons' 1990 win and insists Ben Stiller would die at MSG during a potential Knicks championship. Kareem pushes back, defending the honor of Jalen Brunson and New York's basketball fans. The conversation spirals further when the guest reveals he has no arms or legs and needs assistance, though he somehow manages without them for most of the interview. His proposed solution? Evacuate Manhattan or "hot box all of MSG prior." It's unhinged, weirdly thoughtful, and completely unforgettable. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OEQiG2DP2C8 https://www.youtube.com/embed/OEQiG2DP2C8 117 2025-09-24T13:09:26.000Z 197454 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/i-dont-think-that-shoes-are-designed-to-fit-your-feet 2026-04-15T06:52:12.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/3j_Z0NllJ_I/maxresdefault.jpg I don't think that shoes are designed to fit your feet A woman with strong opinions about footwear tells Kareem that shoes aren't actually designed to fit human feet. She's spiraling after her doctor told her to size up following a corn removal, and she's learned the hard way that most shoes are built narrow for aesthetics rather than comfort. The comparison? Societies that don't wear shoes have naturally spread toes, while shoe-wearing cultures suffer from ingrown toenails, bunions, and toes that "look like the butler's hand in Scary Movie." She argues that flip flop-wearing communities like Sri Lankans have better foot hygiene than people cramming their feet into narrow shoes. Her solution: transitioning to "barefoot shoes" that let toes breathe, even if they're ugly as hell. The conversation gets weird when she jokes about Kareem touching her corn. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3j_Z0NllJ_I https://www.youtube.com/embed/3j_Z0NllJ_I 137 2025-09-23T14:05:17.000Z 3564363 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/love-and-hating-someone-is-pretty-much-the-same-thing 2026-04-15T06:52:18.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/xP3H2C5d7-k/maxresdefault.jpg Love and hating someone is pretty much the same thing Love and hating someone is pretty much the same thing," a rider tells Kareem, kicking off a surprisingly philosophical debate about whether ex-lovers and enemies occupy the same emotional real estate. Kareem pushes back hard. The two spiral into obsession territory, agreeing that both love and hate make you stalk someone's social media and keep tabs on their life. Then it gets weird. "You want to wear their body on your body," the rider jokes, before admitting they haven't dated anyone in three years. The conversation veers through doner kebabs, whether people hate them, and the age-old wisdom about keeping enemies closer than friends. When Kareem suggests loving the haters gives you power, the rider reconsiders their entire philosophy. Kind of. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xP3H2C5d7-k https://www.youtube.com/embed/xP3H2C5d7-k 118 2025-09-22T14:29:03.000Z 428515 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/stop-using-al-to-fix-your-relationship 2026-04-15T06:52:23.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/bt4-lxbkNDM/maxresdefault.jpg Stop using Al to fix your relationship A straphanger's ex-girlfriend used ChatGPT to communicate with him during their relationship, sending messages that reeked of AI with words like "acknowledge" and "emotional intimacy." Plot twist: he was doing the exact same thing, copy-pasting her AI-generated texts right back into his own ChatGPT for responses. They were robots talking to each other. The relationship ended when she asked ChatGPT if she should break up with him and it said pretty much yeah. Kareem tries to offer comfort about moving on and finding someone who doesn't use AI for relationship advice, but the guy immediately announces he could use AI to get advice on dating. Kareem's not having it. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bt4-lxbkNDM https://www.youtube.com/embed/bt4-lxbkNDM 120 2025-09-21T13:28:56.000Z 925673 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/if-you-go-to-a-rock-show-you-gotta-rock-out 2026-04-15T06:52:27.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/-RCNzFYIFrU/maxresdefault.jpg If you go to a rock show, you gotta rock out If you go to a rock show, you got to rock out." An anonymous rider makes the case for actually engaging with live music instead of standing at the bar like you're too cool for school. Kareem agrees. The conversation touches on performers feeding off audience energy, the importance of losing yourself for those few hours, and how "it's actually the knees" when it comes to moving your body. Bad Bunny gets a shoutout after someone had the audacity to ask concertgoers to sit down. The rider also drops a random bomb: Ben Affleck and Matt Damon definitely didn't write Good Will Hunting. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-RCNzFYIFrU https://www.youtube.com/embed/-RCNzFYIFrU 85 2025-09-20T16:51:38.000Z 679127 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/social-media-should-have-business-hours 2026-04-15T06:52:36.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/hUrRvHa68Ho/maxresdefault.jpg Social media should have business hours A straphanger pitches a radical solution to our collective internet addiction: social media should operate on business hours, from 9:00 a.m. to 9:00 p.m. Kareem pushes back immediately. He's making a pretty penny off the always-on internet, after all. But the rider insists it's a public health issue, comparing it to how Nickelodeon used to shut down programming for an hour in summer with a message to go play outside. Her late-night algorithm serves up content like "girl gets shoved in suitcase, murdered in 1984," while Kareem's feeds him wholesome elephant videos. They riff on whether you could pay extra for overtime access (taxes to support the internet infrastructure, naturally) and debate what stays online after hours. Maybe Wikipedia and J-store. Music streaming doesn't count. The conversation captures both the absurdity and appeal of forcibly logging everyone off at bedtime. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hUrRvHa68Ho https://www.youtube.com/embed/hUrRvHa68Ho 139 2025-09-19T15:34:26.000Z 640797 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/all-aliens-are-muslim 2026-04-15T06:52:44.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/FrYR6laU6So/maxresdefault.jpg All Aliens Are Muslim Comedian Malik Elassal has a take that'll ruffle some feathers: space is none of our business. He argues that humanity's obsession with the cosmos is tone-deaf while people can't afford groceries, comparing NASA's announcements to a dad telling his kid about mortgage problems mid-playtime. "The price of eggs is higher than it's ever been," he says, mocking how space news follows real crises. Kareem pushes back, defending space exploration and claiming he's "pro space." But Malik doesn't budge. Why go to the moon when we haven't fixed homelessness? He proposes a new policy: no more space vacations until Earth's problems are solved, coining the slogan "Make Earth great again." The conversation spirals into wild territory, with Malik suggesting he'd go to space only to recruit brilliant aliens to fix our planet. And since Allah is the Lord of the universe, all aliens are probably Muslim anyway. Space Muslims, coming soon. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FrYR6laU6So https://www.youtube.com/embed/FrYR6laU6So 372 2025-09-19T14:15:03.000Z 141898 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/politicians-should-have-to-retire-when-they-turn-70 2026-04-15T06:52:48.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/N023xR02Qug/maxresdefault.jpg Politicians should have to retire when they turn 70 A 55-year-old straphanger thinks politicians should retire at 70, and he's willing to practice what he preaches. "If you were running, I probably wouldn't vote for you either," he tells Kareem. His logic? No 73-year-old has ever completed a game of 4D chess, and a 70-year-old is making policy for a world that no longer exists. The catch is his favorite politician is Bernie Sanders, who he admits "should have stopped being a senator 200 years ago." He'd drop the retirement age to 65 but makes an exception for women since the sample size isn't big enough yet. Grandmas make good lasagna. Grandpas are drunks and racists, which is exactly why families push them into leadership roles. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=N023xR02Qug https://www.youtube.com/embed/N023xR02Qug 114 2025-09-18T13:41:11.000Z 1354939 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/introverts-are-morally-weak 2026-04-15T04:45:57.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/cQgmwRAX8f4/maxresdefault.jpg Introverts Are Morally Weak Comedian Jo Sunday brings a spicy take to the subway: introverts are morally weak. She argues that extroverts carry the emotional labor in relationships and friendships while introverts coast along doing the bare minimum. Jo doesn't hold back. From dating disasters to one-sided connections, she makes her case that it's time for introverts to actually put in some effort. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cQgmwRAX8f4 https://www.youtube.com/embed/cQgmwRAX8f4 311 2025-09-17T14:15:05.000Z 26892 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/danielle-perez-bring-back-eye-fing-feat-danielle-perez 2026-04-15T06:52:53.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/HIUXG_HuDwA/maxresdefault.jpg Bring back eye f***ing. Feat Danielle Perez Danielle Perez has a mission: bring back eye contact and flirtation in public. She argues that younger generations have lost the art of communicating attraction across a bar or park, too busy staring at their phones to make real connections. The problem? Men do it awkwardly, she says, demonstrating their stiff, creepy approach. Women, on the other hand, know how to work it with a glance, a smile, and the whole vibe. It's about validation without harassment. Kareem worries that eye contact has become a liability, admitting he wears sunglasses inside because he's a coward. Danielle fires back that DMs defeat the entire purpose. We used to be a proper country, she insists. Time to get back to basics. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HIUXG_HuDwA https://www.youtube.com/embed/HIUXG_HuDwA 106 2025-09-17T14:14:50.000Z 132278 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/there-should-be-a-money-back-guarantee-on-watermelons 2026-04-15T06:52:59.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/aicb_oR5zbI/maxresdefault.jpg There should be a Money back guarantee on watermelons A straphanger has had enough of disappointing watermelons this summer. She proposes a money back guarantee on the notoriously unpredictable fruit, and Kareem is completely on board. The two bond over their shared confusion about what exactly everyone's looking for when they knock on watermelons at the grocery store. She admits she does it too but has no idea why. The texture issue is real: too dry, too sandy. Kareem actually likes sandy watermelons, which horrifies her. "It's not a sand melon," she points out. Her solution? Grocery stores need watermelon connoisseurs, like baristas for fruit, or maybe just show pictures of the inside before you buy. "You need to know what's inside before you start the relationship. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aicb_oR5zbI https://www.youtube.com/embed/aicb_oR5zbI 117 2025-09-16T17:28:44.000Z 775398 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/before-you-decide-to-get-married-break-up-at-least-once-middlebrowpod 2026-04-15T06:53:06.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/4QGTPM_nDvg/maxresdefault.jpg Before you decide to get married, break up at least once. @Middlebrowpod A straphanger shares an unconventional relationship test: break up at least once before getting married. The logic? You need to see someone at their worst, not just their polished relationship version. Kareem agrees, though the conversation quickly turns to the mechanics of pulling this off without being manipulative. You can't present it as a test. But if there's a fight and someone suggests breaking up, maybe don't rush to fix it. Just say "all right" and take a week. The rider reveals they broke up twice before marriage, while Kareem clocks in at ten. Red flags to watch for during the split: Andrew Tate posts captioned "the wolf is back on the hunt" or finding poop in your shoe. Both are bad signs. The group agrees no therapist would cosign this advice, but there's something to the "if you love something, let it go" philosophy. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4QGTPM_nDvg https://www.youtube.com/embed/4QGTPM_nDvg 100 2025-09-15T15:09:34.000Z 1200512 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/you-dont-need-school-after-eighth-grade 2026-04-15T06:53:11.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/5aKFhu5Ho1M/maxresdefault.jpg You don't need school after eighth grade A rider claims you don't need school after eighth grade, arguing that everything after is just memorization. Kareem pushes back at first, testing the theory with pop quiz questions about Newton's first law and slope intercept formulas. Neither of them can answer correctly. The conversation shifts when the rider suggests high school should become trade school instead, teaching practical skills like cooking, fixing cars, and hanging shelves rather than preparing students for standardized tests. "If I went to high school and they taught me all of those skills, I would be much better off than I am right now," he says. Kareem comes around completely. They agree you could still keep sports and friend groups, just ditch the chemistry memorization. The rider admits he went to college just to hang out, which Kareem respects. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5aKFhu5Ho1M https://www.youtube.com/embed/5aKFhu5Ho1M 126 2025-09-14T19:48:26.000Z 379274 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/madame-tussauds-should-be-niche-local-celebrities 2026-04-15T06:53:17.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/JlUf8qCoTt4/maxresdefault.jpg Madame Tussaud's should be niche, local celebrities Madame Tussauds is the problem, according to a rider who thinks wax museums should feature "niche" local celebrities instead of A-listers. The donor kebab guy. Your plumber. The tube driver. Even "the guy who sells the stuff at the club." Kareem pushes back: most people will never meet Oprah in real life, so isn't that the whole point of having her wax figure available for selfies? The rider concedes but wants interesting artists included alongside Celine Dion. Kareem isn't having it. The conversation devolves into chaos when Kareem spots someone who looks like a wax version of himself, complete with props and strangers posing for photos. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JlUf8qCoTt4 https://www.youtube.com/embed/JlUf8qCoTt4 104 2025-09-13T17:53:57.000Z 417154 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/amanda-maryanna-gordon-people-need-to-have-less-cake-at-their-birthday-party-feat-amanda-maryanna-go 2026-04-15T06:53:22.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/8CQqz0s-nW4/maxresdefault.jpg People need to have less cake at their birthday party. Feat Amanda Maryanna Gordon Amanda Maryanna Gordon brings a birthday party economics lesson to Kareem: people need less cake. Way less. Her argument? It's supply and demand. Too much cake kills the hype, and nobody wants buttercream from Key Foods after shots of tequila. She's seen full cakes abandoned outside clubs. The solution is ice cream cake for smaller crowds because it melts, creating scarcity and turning dessert into the Hunger Games. Kareem loves it. They land on a formula: inviting 40 people? Get a cake for 20. It's anti-food waste, and it's genius. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8CQqz0s-nW4 https://www.youtube.com/embed/8CQqz0s-nW4 129 2025-09-13T16:04:34.000Z 587958 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/peeing-on-any-phone-call-should-be-socially-acceptable 2026-04-15T06:53:27.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/wvxnDGjqwU8/maxresdefault.jpg Peeing on any phone call should be socially acceptable Peeing while on a phone call should be totally acceptable, according to a stranger who shares his bathroom etiquette manifesto with Kareem. The conversation spirals from silent peeing techniques (bladder control versus strategic aim) to European sitting culture to the real question: when is it NOT okay to answer the phone? The rider draws the line at number two, or as Germans call it, "chisen," which he reserves for friends and family only. Kareem learns that choking the chicken translates to "choking Jurgen" in German. New York's bathrooms are a disaster zone, apparently. The whole city is pissed. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wvxnDGjqwU8 https://www.youtube.com/embed/wvxnDGjqwU8 113 2025-09-12T17:11:26.000Z 449005 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/i-dont-think-people-are-actually-religious-jordanjensenlolstop 2026-04-15T06:53:35.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/BZg4e_RLfGk/maxresdefault.jpg I don't think people are actually religious. @jordanjensenlolstop A straphanger argues that most religious people don't actually believe what they claim to believe. Her logic is simple: if someone truly thought their friends were going to "burn in hell," they'd be shaking them awake in the middle of the night begging them to accept Jesus. Instead, people talk more about quitting sugar or keto than saving souls. She points to her aunt, who texts her every day saying "Please accept Jesus," as an example of someone who's genuinely religious. The fundamentalists knocking on doors? Those are the real believers. Everyone else is just enjoying the vibe. Kareem pushes back, asking whether going to church every Sunday or Orthodox Jews avoiding electricity on Shabbat counts as real belief. Not enough, she insists. Following rules doesn't mean you buy the doctrine. It drives her nuts seeing people call themselves Christian but make caveats about loving gay people, or Muslims who hang out with heathens like her. They're in it for the tribe, not the theology. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BZg4e_RLfGk https://www.youtube.com/embed/BZg4e_RLfGk 152 2025-09-12T13:57:10.000Z 3055652 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/do-you-have-motion 2026-04-15T06:53:39.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/vHhpZqAURW0/maxresdefault.jpg Do you have motion? Do you have motion?" Kareem asks an older rider, who admits they're unfamiliar with the latest Gen Z slang making the rounds. The host explains that having motion means you're succeeding, killing it, making moves in life. It's the kind of momentum you'd want in a partner, not just a friend. The rider catches on quickly. By the end, they're all joking about being literally in motion on the subway. Kareem gets dubbed Gen Z himself. The slang just dropped, apparently. And now everyone's got it. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vHhpZqAURW0 https://www.youtube.com/embed/vHhpZqAURW0 72 2025-09-11T15:09:49.000Z 361779 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/we-have-over-therapized-ourselves-as-a-society 2026-04-15T06:53:45.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/NOUc996_k9g/maxresdefault.jpg We have over therapized ourselves as a society A straphanger whose mom is a therapist argues that society has become obsessed with pathologizing every negative emotion instead of just living with discomfort. "Back in the day, I remember you could just be kind of weird," Kareem says, and the two riff on how constant therapy culture pressures people to eradicate sadness immediately rather than sitting with it. The rider shares that after getting diagnosed with ADHD and depression from a monotonous job, they ditched the pills and changed their lifestyle instead. Now they feel "pretty damn good." Their hot take? Imagine if Bob Dylan had therapized away his melancholy. We wouldn't have his music. Real mental health issues deserve treatment, they clarify, but not every bad day needs medication. Sometimes being a little mental is okay. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NOUc996_k9g https://www.youtube.com/embed/NOUc996_k9g 128 2025-09-11T13:58:33.000Z 1474957 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/there-is-no-they-without-a-we 2026-04-15T06:53:49.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/Wyq_6KNJSsE/maxresdefault.jpg There is no they without a we A rider with a questionable German accent claims to be from the Black Forest and insists "there is no 'they' without a 'we.'" Kareem tries multiple times to break the bit, asking the stranger to just do regular Subway Takes, but they persist with rambling philosophy about Berlin as a city of contrasts where east and west meet. Things get weird. The rider waxes poetic about losing and finding yourself, living in gray areas, and when pressed about their least favorite World War, picks World War I because "it is less clear who the bad guy is." The whole interaction feels like performance art nobody asked for. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Wyq_6KNJSsE https://www.youtube.com/embed/Wyq_6KNJSsE 80 2025-09-10T14:53:26.000Z 3461701 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/zoe-kravitz-on-life-death-and-the-matrix 2026-04-15T06:53:57.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/6iva-qFZ29c/maxresdefault.jpg Zoë Kravitz on Life, Death, and the Matrix Zoë Kravitz has strong opinions about Bluetooth. "It doesn't work," she tells Kareem, insisting that technology only truly works if it functions 100% of the time, not just when you're trying to set a vibe on a date and have to "forget the network." The conversation spirals from there. Kravitz opens up about her evolution from acting to directing Blink Twice, explaining that storytelling as a whole is what she's really into. She admits she's a total control freak but also knows that art has to show you what it wants to be. That's where the magic is. They debate airplane food (she prefers a PB&J over duck in cream sauce), swap flying fears, and bond over Justin Bieber's new album. When the train goes eerily quiet, Kravitz notes that an empty subway car usually means something bad happened on it. Nothing did this time. They're just lucky. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6iva-qFZ29c https://www.youtube.com/embed/6iva-qFZ29c 917 2025-09-10T14:15:07.000Z 149866 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/we-should-let-horses-go 2026-04-15T06:54:03.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/H5TyxXmI34E/maxresdefault.jpg We should let horses go A straphanger's hot take: we should let horses go. Free them. The rider argues that humans have given horses way too many jobs, from physical labor to racing to horse therapy, which apparently counts as emotional labor. Kareem's fully on board, pointing out that we barely even use horses anymore except for fun, like those Central Park carriage rides, when they should be grazing the plains in Montana. The conversation escalates quickly. The guest reveals that breaking a horse is literally what we call taming them, which sounds pretty dark compared to how a cat just sticks around for tuna. Soon they're advocating for freeing all pets, citing Turkey's street cats as citizens with passports. The wildest proposal? Horses should vote. That's what the left needs: the horse coalition. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=H5TyxXmI34E https://www.youtube.com/embed/H5TyxXmI34E 101 2025-09-09T18:42:17.000Z 584362 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/emojis-are-the-best-invention-of-the-21st-century 2026-04-15T06:54:09.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/DamCjNKccgY/maxresdefault.jpg Emojis are the best invention of the 21st century A subway rider defends emojis as the 21st century's greatest invention, and Kareem's fully on board. The conversation quickly spirals from wholesome intergenerational communication into wildly inappropriate territory when the rider admits she sent her 77-year-old aunt a soap and eggplant emoji combo. The aunt thought it was sweet. It wasn't. What follows is an unhinged tour through emoji double meanings, elderly relatives with dentures removed, and whether the salsa dancing lady looks like she's about to have digestive issues. They land on the sleepy drooling face. That's "grandpa emoji." The rider's thesis holds: emojis let you speak your own language, and sometimes that language is absolutely filthy while appearing totally innocent. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DamCjNKccgY https://www.youtube.com/embed/DamCjNKccgY 118 2025-09-09T13:54:31.000Z 475697 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/the-only-thing-people-are-truly-loyal-to-are-sports-teams-feat-omarespn 2026-04-15T06:54:16.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/_4hO0eLJ3iE/maxresdefault.jpg The only thing people are truly loyal to are sports teams. Feat @OmarESPN A straphanger argues that sports teams command the only true loyalty left in modern life. People bail on jobs and friends, but he's been suffering through Miami Dolphins misery for years, texting his dad every Sunday about how terrible they are, only to come back for more. Kareem pushes back, insisting he's loyal to plenty of non-sports things. The rider counters with a restaurant analogy: one bad meal in New York and you're done forever, but a sports team can be garbage for 25 years and fans keep showing up. They debate European soccer fanatics versus American devotion, with the rider noting that wearing a rival jersey at a Barcelona game means "it's over." He eventually pitches his fandom as a green flag for dating: if he'll stick with the Dolphins through decades of pain, he's clearly commitment material. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_4hO0eLJ3iE https://www.youtube.com/embed/_4hO0eLJ3iE 140 2025-09-08T13:25:17.000Z 661625 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/episode-482-people-are-training-way-too-hard 2026-04-15T06:54:22.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/QXw0HGkrqLc/maxresdefault.jpg Episode 482: People are training way too hard A stranger in Berlin thinks people are training way too hard at the gym, and Kareem couldn't agree more. Why are 40-year-old men running marathons when they could be home drinking beer? The conversation turns into a full-blown rant about HIIT classes that feel like military boot camps, reformer Pilates machines that look like medieval torture devices, and fitness influencers like The Rock making everyone think their name is also their body. "Their name is Tony," the rider points out. Even Pilates got hard. What happened to just taking a walk and eating ice cream? The two bond over their shared anti-fitness philosophy, with Kareem jokingly crowned as the movement's new leader. They're not planning to overthrow the government. They just want everyone to chill out. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QXw0HGkrqLc https://www.youtube.com/embed/QXw0HGkrqLc 107 2025-09-07T15:34:59.000Z 915148 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/episode-481-every-menushould-be-one-page 2026-04-15T06:54:29.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/U7ewTP6ysiI/maxresdefault.jpg Episode 481: Every menushould be one page A passionate stranger on the subway has strong opinions about restaurant menus: they should never exceed one page. The rider explains that multi-page menus ruin the entire dining experience, causing them to dissociate while everyone else is having fun, frantically earmarking items and interrogating friends about their orders. When the server finally arrives, they panic and blurt out "Chicken," then spend the whole meal regretting it. Kareem initially pushes back but quickly finds himself agreeing. The conversation spirals into tangents about photo menus ("I'm not a child"), leather-bound wine lists, and whether drinks menus should simply say "Drinks. We got them." Diners get a special exemption because they're not really about food. They're fluorescent-lit therapy sessions where the waitress calls you "hun" and you can talk about your dad's seven-day coma over French fries. Chain restaurants, however, spark debate. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=U7ewTP6ysiI https://www.youtube.com/embed/U7ewTP6ysiI 164 2025-09-06T15:01:18.000Z 759354 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/i-still-think-its-good-for-you-to-party-for-72-hours 2026-04-15T06:54:34.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/LS3MICUCNXM/maxresdefault.jpg I still think it's good for you to party for 72 hours A stranger fresh off a 72-hour Berlin party bender stumbles through a conversation with Kareem that's equal parts incoherent and hilarious. The rider insists partying for three days straight isn't harmful while clearly suffering the consequences, rattling off club names like Stitch Cat Club, Club Der Visionäre, and Tresor. They can barely string together coherent thoughts. Kareem suggests heading to the airport. The whole exchange captures the aftermath of Berlin's legendary nightlife scene in real time, complete with fractured sentences and zero regrets about the previous night's chaos. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LS3MICUCNXM https://www.youtube.com/embed/LS3MICUCNXM 100 2025-09-05T20:33:37.000Z 946834 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/zoe-kravitz-bluetooth-does-not-work-feat-zoe-kravitz 2026-04-15T06:54:40.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/74Gr5K53-Wk/maxresdefault.jpg Bluetooth does not work. Feat Zoe Kravitz Zoe Kravitz has strong opinions about Bluetooth, and they're not positive. She argues the technology fundamentally fails because working means it functions "100% of the time," not just occasionally. Kareem pushes back, insisting Bluetooth does work, at least partially. Zoe paints vivid scenarios of the technology's failures: trying to set a romantic mood on a date only to have to "forget the network," or pulling over on the highway just to start a playlist. She's not buying the convenience argument either. A wire isn't annoying enough to justify technology that works "like 42% of the time." Kareem concedes the tech hasn't been perfected. Zoe's verdict? Bluetooth is "medium rare" and needs to go back in the oven. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=74Gr5K53-Wk https://www.youtube.com/embed/74Gr5K53-Wk 98 2025-09-05T15:36:49.000Z 1513677 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/its-actually-good-for-you-to-party-for-72-hours 2026-04-15T06:54:45.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/wtNvoJOpZy8/maxresdefault.jpg It's actually good for you to party for 72 hours A masked stranger in Berlin claims he's been partying for 72 straight hours and won't stop until Monday. He left his house Wednesday. When Kareem asks why this is fun, the response is blunt: "I didn't say it's fun." But someone has to do it to keep club culture alive, and he's the guy. The routine is simple: ride the train, listen to music, hit a club, then an after hour, then another club, then another after hour. Rinse and repeat. He met his wife at an after hour. Kareem points out that laying in bed looking at your phone sounds pretty similar to an after hour, just with fewer people. The stranger invites Kareem to join him that night at 3 a.m. Kareem accepts. Welcome to Berlin. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wtNvoJOpZy8 https://www.youtube.com/embed/wtNvoJOpZy8 109 2025-09-04T16:13:20.000Z 5120578 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/episode-477-no-dogs-on-the-subway 2026-04-15T06:54:50.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/596l4CcV1Rs/maxresdefault.jpg Episode 477: No dogs on the subway A straphanger makes a firm declaration: no dogs on the subway. The rider isn't worried about someone eating Chinese food or doing their nails during their daily hour-long commute, but draws the line at "some big ass dog snuffling into my fits." Kareem agrees, especially when it's clearly an untrained, irritated animal stuck in the can with everyone else. The conversation spirals through the anxieties of subway life, backpack collisions, August heat, and the very real fear of a Doberman removing your kneecap. Then comes the pitch: a dedicated train car with astroturf, no seats, where dogs can literally run wild. It's a dog park on rails. For one glorious moment, it sounds brilliant. Then reality sets in, and the idea gets walked back fast. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=596l4CcV1Rs https://www.youtube.com/embed/596l4CcV1Rs 114 2025-09-03T15:04:07.000Z 300606 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/we-should-abolish-elections 2026-04-15T06:54:58.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/U_FAvMFQokQ/maxresdefault.jpg We Should Abolish Elections Riz Ahmed tells Kareem we should abolish all elections and pick politicians through a randomized lottery system, like jury duty. The Oscar-winning actor argues that elections attract people who want power, while random selection would give us leaders who just want to go home. "Anyone who really wants to be a politician, you don't want them," he reasons. They debate whether a random bodega guy or substitute teacher could run the country better than current politicians. Donald Trump already feels pretty random anyway. Ahmed opens up about the Riz test, a measurement of Muslim representation in film that his own movies sometimes fail. He reflects on how projects find you at the right moment rather than the other way around, and why chasing validation kills creativity. The creative process works best when you're egoless, he says, but the creative industries demand you build a brand. That's the contradiction. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=U_FAvMFQokQ https://www.youtube.com/embed/U_FAvMFQokQ 902 2025-09-03T14:15:04.000Z 115883 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/episode-476-its-only-a-bodega-if-its-owned-and-operated-by-a-puerto-rican-or-dom 2026-04-15T06:55:08.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/GNH7PD9rYRc/maxresdefault.jpg Episode 476: It's only a bodega if it's owned and operated by a Puerto Rican or Dominican A straphanger raised in his dad's bodega drops some serious knowledge on Kareem: it's only a bodega if it's owned and operated by a Puerto Rican or Dominican. Everything else? Korean delis, Punjabi convenience stores, and yes, Yemeni hookah delis. The rider, who's working on a bodega documentary and whose uncle was president of the Bodega Association, traces the history from the Spanish-American War through waves of immigration. Puerto Ricans ran the original bodegas, sold to Dominicans, who then sold to Yemenis. The word means "warehouse" in Spanish. He loves that the name's kept alive even if the ownership changed. Just don't call it what it's not. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GNH7PD9rYRc https://www.youtube.com/embed/GNH7PD9rYRc 109 2025-09-01T15:28:35.000Z 2210086 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/sometimes-a-baddie-will-look-just-like-her-dad-and-thats-okay 2026-04-15T06:55:14.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/Ek38yzuxVBU/maxresdefault.jpg Sometimes a baddie will look just like her dad, and that's okay A stranger on the subway defends dating women who look like their fathers, arguing that "if you're a guy and you stop talking to a girl because she looks like her dad, you're weak." The take gets progressively spicier. He insists it's sexist that nobody cares when someone looks like their mom, but people freak out when a woman resembles her dad. Kareem joins in, agreeing that "sometimes the dad's a baddie." The conversation spirals into whether this counts as a fetish (firmly denied) and ends with both men claiming they've dated multiple women who look just like their fathers. They coin the term "a daddy with a fine daddy." It's absurd. It's weirdly specific. The comments section is definitely going to have opinions. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ek38yzuxVBU https://www.youtube.com/embed/Ek38yzuxVBU 109 2025-08-31T15:44:54.000Z 1141948 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/there-should-be-one-day-a-week-where-only-women-are-allowed-in-guitar-centers 2026-04-15T06:55:21.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/5H3_LJWLcpk/maxresdefault.jpg There should be one day a week where only women are allowed in Guitar Centers A woman on the subway has a proposal: Guitar Center needs one day a week reserved exclusively for women. The reason? Every visit turns into a gauntlet of sweaty guys playing "Enter Sandman" at competing volumes while she's just trying to buy a cable. Kareem loves it. The problem isn't just the sonic chaos. Female shoppers face a double threat from the staff: aggressive horniness combined with relentless mansplaining about what music is as a whole. She suggests Wednesday, borrowing the model from bathhouses that already do gendered hours. The worst Guitar Center experience? A guy asked about her band, offered his services as a drummer, then forced her to stand there while he performed an unsolicited drum solo tryout. She's 32 now. The Wonderwall move doesn't hit the same. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5H3_LJWLcpk https://www.youtube.com/embed/5H3_LJWLcpk 120 2025-08-30T13:46:04.000Z 792022 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/brunch-is-kind-cool-feat-espns-stephenasmithspeaks 2026-04-15T06:55:27.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/dH2qusPLGjU/maxresdefault.jpg Brunch is kind cool. Feat ESPN's @stephenasmithspeaks Stephen A. Smith defends brunch with unexpected passion on the E Train, telling Kareem he's "not a full-fledged breakfast" and "not a full-fledged lunch" kind of meal. The ESPN personality reveals he's a lobster Benedict guy (spotted on Page Six, apparently) while Kareem admits he skips lunch entirely. They spar over compliments and interview etiquette. Stephen A. predicts the Knicks will reach the NBA Finals, then immediately backtracks. He's old school on music, Jay-Z, Chris Brown, DJ Khaled for the laughs, and makes it clear his name is "Stephen A." Not Unk. The back-and-forth is relentless, with Stephen A. reminding Kareem that everything said on this train ride is "a matter of record. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dH2qusPLGjU https://www.youtube.com/embed/dH2qusPLGjU 144 2025-08-29T13:50:52.000Z 475119 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/any-dinner-reservation-or-plan-after-8pm-is-way-too-late 2026-04-15T06:55:33.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/GfQ5nbkbA30/maxresdefault.jpg Any dinner reservation or plan after 8pm is way too late A straphanger makes the case that any dinner reservation after 8:00 p.m. is way too late, and Kareem is right there with her. They bond over preferring dinner between 6:00 and 7:00, maybe even 4:00 if you're feeling bold. The math is brutal: a 9:00 p.m. reservation means someone shows up late at 9:20, apps arrive at 9:50, and entrees don't hit the table until 10:30. By then you're starving and exhausted. The real issue? New York's trying too hard to be European when it should embrace Midwestern energy. Plus, when you break down your rent by the day, you realize you need to actually be home to get your money's worth. Stop pretending to be cool. Eat at 6:00. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GfQ5nbkbA30 https://www.youtube.com/embed/GfQ5nbkbA30 111 2025-08-28T15:55:12.000Z 1226966 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/full-episode-now-on-youtube 2026-04-15T06:55:38.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/RsY7Vou7g8o/maxresdefault.jpg Full episode now on YouTube A stranger with "funky white boy energy" catches Kareem's attention on the subway. It's the kind of vibe, the rider explains, that comes from guys in Challengers, that tennis movie with the impossible-to-define cool factor. The conversation pivots to wrist action. Not tennis-related wrist action, just vibes. Kareem's mesmerized watching this guy move his wrists around like it's performance art, admitting he's entertained like a two-year-old or a cat chasing lasers. The whole exchange is wonderfully pointless and somehow perfectly captures the strange energy of underground small talk. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RsY7Vou7g8o https://www.youtube.com/embed/RsY7Vou7g8o 40 2025-08-27T22:46:03.000Z 288410 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/austin-butlers-most-embarrassing-take 2026-04-15T06:55:55.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/k0qDpOyTZSE/maxresdefault.jpg Austin Butler’s Most Embarrassing Take Austin Butler reveals he's never been invited to a bachelor party, kicking off a surprisingly goofy conversation with Kareem about wedding dreams, embarrassment, and the weird physics of fame. The actor talks about his philosophy that "embarrassment is an underexplored emotion" and why making a fool of yourself might be the secret to everything you want. He gets real about people still asking about his Elvis voice, admitting it made him question his own authenticity even after nailing the performance. Butler shares his personal mantra, "do what's right right now," pushing back against overthinking every move like it's chess. There's also a story about dancing at a Bad Bunny concert in Puerto Rico with Darren Aronofsky, plus reflections on shyness, bullying, and why you can't focus so much on what other people think. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=k0qDpOyTZSE https://www.youtube.com/embed/k0qDpOyTZSE 924 2025-08-27T14:15:09.000Z 291818 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/eddie-huang-i-think-we-shouldnormalize-adult-diapers-feat-eddie-huang 2026-04-15T06:56:08.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/fkM3b91dlxw/maxresdefault.jpg I think we shouldnormalize adult diapers. Feat Eddie Huang Eddie Huang thinks we should normalize adult diapers, and he's serious. His argument? The food system has destroyed our digestion to the point where nobody can make it through dinner without intestinal distress. Kareem pushes back at first, but Huang reveals he's already worn adult diapers in certain countries, including a harrowing incident at Genghis Khan airport in Mongolia involving no toilet paper and sacrificed socks. The two bond over watching their toddlers poop with zero shame, comparing notes on their kids' different bathroom styles. Huang's proposed system: poop in the diaper, toss it, wet wipe, shower, and get back out there. Kareem wavers between intrigue and horror throughout. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fkM3b91dlxw https://www.youtube.com/embed/fkM3b91dlxw 119 2025-08-27T14:01:36.000Z 248880 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/sex-is-the-point-of-everything 2026-04-15T06:56:15.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/-maAHBjbeQQ/maxresdefault.jpg Sex Is the Point of Everything Comedian Annie Hamilton steps onto the train with a bold thesis: the point of everything is to get laid. She and Kareem riff on how sex drives ambition, fashion choices, and power dynamics, with Annie admitting she's "flown halfway across the world" and smoked countless cigarettes in pursuit of desire. The conversation careens through her regret over wearing a peasant top, her theory that relationships shouldn't involve the best sex of your life (jealousy ruins it), and why 21-year-old girls coming as quickly as 21-year-old boys would make the world "more violent and diabolical." Annie's self-deprecating energy takes over as she worries she's "demonstrating how exactly not to get laid" on camera. It's anxious, funny, and relentlessly honest. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-maAHBjbeQQ https://www.youtube.com/embed/-maAHBjbeQQ 313 2025-08-26T14:15:00.000Z 294993 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/if-youre-my-employer-just-be-mean-to-me 2026-04-15T06:56:22.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/C-pvEIbQ1cc/maxresdefault.jpg If you're my employer, just be mean to me If you're my employer, just be mean to me," a straphanger tells Kareem, arguing that workplace relationships should drop all pretense of friendliness. This guy's fed up with fake niceness. He wants bosses to stop with the "you guys, I love the way you hustle" routine and just admit they're paying for labor, not friendship. The transaction's the point. Kareem pushes back, asking about email sign-offs and middle managers, but the rider insists only evil and useless people climb the corporate ladder anyway. He's looking for clarity, not compliments. The conversation spirals into talk of slavery, ideological breaks, and oppression before the rider reveals he's actually the boss himself, prompting Kareem to shut down the camera in mock horror at the darkness unfolding. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=C-pvEIbQ1cc https://www.youtube.com/embed/C-pvEIbQ1cc 108 2025-08-25T13:53:31.000Z 803417 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/riz-ahmed-we-need-to-stop-having-all-election-and-elect-leaders-through-a-random-lottery-f 2026-04-15T06:56:28.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/M7oTOS7Ekqw/maxresdefault.jpg We need to stop having all election and elect leaders through a random lottery. Feat Riz Ahmed Riz Ahmed defends democracy against Kareem's wild proposal to replace all elections with a completely randomized lottery system. No more voting, no more campaigns, just pure chance selecting leaders like jury duty. Ahmed pushes back hard at first, calling it one of the worst ideas he's ever heard, but Kareem argues the bar is already in hell with politicians like Donald Trump. The logic shifts: right now we have crazy people who want power, but with a lottery we'd just have crazy people who want to go home. Ahmed starts to come around. They'd keep the deep state though, the bureaucrats who actually know math and make things run. Just randomize the politicians who need to reach agreements. After all, Donald Trump was basically random anyway, just a reality TV landlord. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=M7oTOS7Ekqw https://www.youtube.com/embed/M7oTOS7Ekqw 137 2025-08-23T18:40:51.000Z 3318903 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/every-american-should-have-to-spend-about-a-year-in-an-active-war-zone 2026-04-15T06:56:34.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/1MYTNDdw9is/maxresdefault.jpg Every American should have to spend about a year in an active war zone A straphanger pitches mandatory gap years in active war zones instead of backpacking through Europe. The initial pitch gets pushback, but Kareem's convinced once the rider clarifies: no weapons, no protective gear, just vibing in South Sudan to build empathy. The system includes a placement test determining your war zone assignment based on life experience, with refugees as the sole exemption. You'd get assigned to a family and help out by cooking or whatever's needed. The straphanger argues Americans are too desensitized to war as scrollable content and need real exposure to understand its horror. Kareem shifts his position completely. The take is wild but weirdly earnest about ending conflicts through forced perspective. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1MYTNDdw9is https://www.youtube.com/embed/1MYTNDdw9is 104 2025-08-22T14:49:38.000Z 648732 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/the-healthcare-system-is-scamming-you 2026-04-15T06:56:46.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/tCwMS-ACUnA/maxresdefault.jpg The Healthcare System Is Scamming You Michelle Buteau, comedian and actress, boards the subway with Kareem to talk about America's broken healthcare system. She points out the absurd reality that "it's easier to get insurance for your dog than it is to get insurance for your child." The conversation gets personal fast. Buteau shares how her Dutch husband walks through life with a confidence she never had growing up without coverage, while she recounts taping a popsicle stick to her torn ligament in college because she couldn't afford treatment. They tackle the wild costs of dental work, vision insurance being inexplicably cheap despite eyes being irreplaceable, and why basic care feels like a luxury instead of a right. Buteau wishes she could focus on pettier takes, like celebrities doing standup for money, but this issue hits too close to home. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tCwMS-ACUnA https://www.youtube.com/embed/tCwMS-ACUnA 166 2025-08-22T14:15:18.000Z 60052 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/austin-butler-i-dont-think-its-fair-that-ive-never-been-invited-to-a-bachelor-party-feat-austi 2026-04-15T06:56:51.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/FPe3fnnuelY/maxresdefault.jpg I don't think it's fair that I've never been invited to a bachelor party. Feat Austin Butler Austin Butler has never been invited to a bachelor party, and he's not happy about it. Kareem agrees it's unfair. The guest seems fun enough, sporting sunglasses on the subway like "the cool neighbor who lives in the van" from '90s TV. A reformed bully, maybe. The conversation spirals into planning a joint bachelor party in Ireland, complete with a guest list featuring two Adams, one Sean, and friends named Brown and White. They're not talking about racism, Butler insists. Just actual names. By the end, they're debating whether a shared bachelor party would be too romantic and whether they'd serve as each other's best man. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FPe3fnnuelY https://www.youtube.com/embed/FPe3fnnuelY 103 2025-08-21T15:30:57.000Z 1363788 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/sponsored-episode-466-we-should-not-be-bringing-back-wired-headphones-googlepixe 2026-04-15T06:56:57.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/O6BK-CyN81E/maxresdefault.jpg #sponsored Episode 466: We should not be bringing back wired headphones. @googlepixel Wired headphones are embarrassing, and a straphanger isn't having it. Kareem meets someone with strong opinions about the supposed "return" of tangled cords, comparing the trend to bringing back manual windows or rotary phones. The rider argues that when headphones stopped being free, society should've stopped using them entirely. "This looks dumb," they insist, demonstrating how wired buds get tangled while praising their own Google Pixel Buds Pro 2 that answer calls with a simple head gesture. The conversation touches on big fashion's lies about what's cool, the loneliness of being underground, and why vintage cars are acceptable nostalgia but flip phones aren't. Their daughter better not even think about wearing wires. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=O6BK-CyN81E https://www.youtube.com/embed/O6BK-CyN81E 105 2025-08-20T18:14:41.000Z 471815 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/the-recliner-seat-has-ruined-the-movie-going-experience-quadcinemacom-to-buy-tix 2026-04-15T06:57:03.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/D1lJ69rp2rQ/maxresdefault.jpg The recliner seat has ruined the movie going experience. QuadCinema.com to buy tix to Kareem’s film A recliner seat takes up the square footage of four normal movie theater seats, according to one rider who argues that luxury seating has killed the moviegoing vibe. Kareem disagrees at first, defending the comfort, but his companion makes a compelling point about romance. How are you supposed to share popcorn or steal a first kiss when you're spread out like you're in separate living rooms? The argument shifts when they acknowledge indie theaters deserve different rules, which conveniently segues into a plug for their own film playing at Quad Cinema on 13th Street from August 26th to 28th. No recliners there. They'll be doing Q&As with Jerry Saltz and Daniel Arnold for their walk-and-talk movie in the vein of Before Sunrise and My Dinner with Andre. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=D1lJ69rp2rQ https://www.youtube.com/embed/D1lJ69rp2rQ 139 2025-08-19T21:59:31.000Z 559768 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/david-byrne-everybody-should-follow-the-bike-lane-arrows-feat-david-byrne 2026-04-15T06:57:10.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/-J3ydoAC708/maxresdefault.jpg Everybody should follow the bike lane arrows. Feat David Byrne David Byrne has a take about New York bike lanes: follow the arrows. Simple, right? Not in practice. Kareem and the Talking Heads frontman bond over the chaos of cyclists going the wrong way, delivery workers zooming past in both directions, and the cultural differences between biking in NYC versus Copenhagen, where Byrne once got publicly shamed for stopping in a bike lane to check his phone. The conversation turns to why delivery cyclists break the rules constantly. They're paid per delivery, not hourly, so speed matters more than safety. Kareem admits he's part of the problem, anxiously tracking his pizza on his phone while the guy cutting corners is just trying to avoid getting yelled at. Both agree they tip 20% regardless. Society ruined it. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-J3ydoAC708 https://www.youtube.com/embed/-J3ydoAC708 142 2025-08-19T14:24:28.000Z 397495 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/david-byrne-on-how-culture-changed-after-the-internet 2026-04-15T06:57:26.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/Oo_b5z093Hw/maxresdefault.jpg David Byrne on How Culture Changed After the Internet David Byrne shows up in bright orange, testing colors for his upcoming tour. The Talking Heads frontman explains to Kareem that orange "holds up" under different stage lighting better than green, which turns muddy. They talk bike lanes. A lot. Byrne rides everywhere in New York and thinks everyone should follow the arrows, no exceptions. He got publicly shamed in Copenhagen for stopping in a bike lane to check directions. Both agree delivery workers are partly at fault for zooming the wrong way, but the real culprit is the gig economy payment structure that forces them to rush. Byrne's new album features narrative songs, including "I Met the Buddha at a Downtown Party," and some love songs since he's getting married soon. The conversation ends with Kareem introducing Byrne to the Rizzler, an eight-year-old viral sensation famous for his charisma face. Byrne watches, bemused. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Oo_b5z093Hw https://www.youtube.com/embed/Oo_b5z093Hw 1131 2025-08-19T14:15:02.000Z 136221 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/doing-a-blaccent-should-be-as-taboo-as-saying-the-n-word 2026-04-15T06:57:32.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/Cl3cipyWmNg/maxresdefault.jpg Doing a blaccent should be as taboo as saying the n word A straphanger thinks doing a blaccent should be as taboo as saying the n-word, and Kareem's here for it. She recounts the mortifying moment her white college boyfriend dropped the octave around her Black friends and even threw out a "finna" to a group of Black girls. Truly painful. The conversation spirals into digital blackface territory (using the darkest emoji when you're white) and TikTok's role in normalizing AAVE without context. Her proposed solution? The government should give all Black people spray bottles filled with milk. Not water. Dairy milk. Kareem tests out his own blaccent, triggering her fight or flight response, before she delivers the final plea: stop using the blaccent. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Cl3cipyWmNg https://www.youtube.com/embed/Cl3cipyWmNg 118 2025-08-17T18:02:46.000Z 481976 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/each-nyc-neighborhood-should-have-a-sports-club-that-competes-in-a-yearly 2026-04-15T06:57:38.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/2sA5qR6i-RE/maxresdefault.jpg Each NYC neighborhood should have a sports club that competes in a yearly A straphanger pitches a brilliantly chaotic idea: every NYC neighborhood gets its own sports club that competes in a yearly tournament. The concept snowballs fast. Upper West Side versus Upper East Side in basketball. Astoria crushing Williamsburg in soccer but losing in track and field. The best matchups get increasingly specific and absurd. Red Hook takes javelin because "even the hipsters down in Red Hook are pretty rough looking." Staten Island dominates shooting since all the cops live there. Kareem throws out Bushwick versus Upper East Side, and the rider doesn't hesitate: Upper East would destroy them. The prize? A massive statue placed in the neighborhood of your choice. This rider would stick theirs in Bushwick "as a big joke." Hoboken tries to enter the chat but gets immediately rejected because it's New Jersey. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2sA5qR6i-RE https://www.youtube.com/embed/2sA5qR6i-RE 105 2025-08-15T15:55:05.000Z 411991 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/every-country-should-have-one-nuclear-bomb 2026-04-15T06:57:45.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/D6Yf0vfJ5tA/maxresdefault.jpg Every Country Should Have One Nuclear Bomb Comedian and juggler Marcus Monroe steps onto the train with a provocative proposition: every country should have exactly one nuclear bomb. He argues it would level the playing field in global politics and eliminate the guessing game of who has what arsenal. Right now there are 12,469 nukes spread across 195 countries, so Marcus is pitching a reduction to just 195 total. Kareem pushes back, preferring zero bombs altogether, but Marcus counters that his plan is at least realistic. The conversation spirals into absurd territory as they debate bomb sizes, whether small countries should get bigger weapons, and if the size should match the target country. Marcus admits he'd prefer world peace too, but points out that "everyone's going to be like, yeah, you idiot, of course." He knows his take is designed to get people talking. The juggling and diplomacy connection? You'll have to watch to find out. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=D6Yf0vfJ5tA https://www.youtube.com/embed/D6Yf0vfJ5tA 173 2025-08-15T14:15:02.000Z 19114 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/smoking-is-actually-okay-for-you-feat-bob 2026-04-15T06:57:50.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/_v7AgBF399o/maxresdefault.jpg Smoking is actually okay for you. Feat Bob Bob has been smoking for over 60 years and completed six marathons, pulling over to light up once every two hours during races. He smokes 10 cigarettes a day. His lungs are fine, he insists, backing up his wild take that smoking is actually okay for you as long as you walk a lot. Kareem presses him on the addiction, and Bob admits he tried quitting once but lasted about two hours before his boss begged him to buy another pack because he was unbearable. His favorite part? The excuse to step outside every couple hours and "take in some fresh air" while smoking. He gets off at his stop, probably to light one up. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_v7AgBF399o https://www.youtube.com/embed/_v7AgBF399o 115 2025-08-13T19:39:27.000Z 1686416 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/stop-holding-our-money-hostage 2026-04-15T06:57:57.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/Lq7y8qNtJRM/maxresdefault.jpg Stop Holding Our Money Hostage Photographer and stylist Todd S. Johnson is fed up with chasing invoices. He and Kareem tear into the broken payment culture plaguing freelancers, calling out net30 and net60 terms as barely disguised cash hoarding schemes. Johnson keeps it real: if it's under $2,500, payment should be immediate. "Venmo moment. Zel me. Cash at me." The conversation hits hard on double standards. Your landlord won't accept net30, Verizon won't wait, your dealer definitely isn't offering payment plans, so why should creatives subsidize company cash flow? Johnson recounts getting hit with a net30 that stretched to net90, then being treated like a loan shark for asking about his own money. The frustration is palpable and justified. When the pizza shop gets paid on the spot and Uber drivers collect instantly, freelancers deserve the same respect. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Lq7y8qNtJRM https://www.youtube.com/embed/Lq7y8qNtJRM 95 2025-08-12T14:15:03.000Z 25940 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/movie-theaters-need-live-commentary 2026-04-15T06:58:04.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/TdRxRa7JPAI/maxresdefault.jpg Movie theaters need live commentary Movie theaters need live commentary, according to a straphanger who wants the option of special screenings with running narration. Not just Mystery Science Theater riffs either. They'd happily settle for anyone doing it, from top actors to PAs, and they're volunteering to commentate on The Dark Knight themselves despite briefly confusing it with the Joaquin Phoenix Joker movie. Kareem pushes back on their expertise, pointing out how Christian Bale's Batman voice defies nationality identification. The conversation shifts to Goodfellas and whether Michael Perugi's boss in the film hates him or is just short-staffed. Beyond live commentary, the rider pitches bringing back 1930s and 40s roadshow-style presentations with music before the movie, intermissions, and more music after. Make it epic again. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TdRxRa7JPAI https://www.youtube.com/embed/TdRxRa7JPAI 95 2025-08-11T18:16:42.000Z 211010 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/the-internet-rocks-feat 2026-04-15T06:58:10.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/43AA5rsipLo/maxresdefault.jpg The internet rocks. Feat A straphanger delivers a spirited defense of being extremely online. Kareem agrees. The conversation celebrates weird internet finds like "top 10 Jamaicans that died at 9/11," the kind of oddball content that made logging on worthwhile in the first place. They reminisce about old blogging days: Kareem's emo "the chemicals between us.blogspot.com" from college and his conversation partner's nine-year-old creation "Fuzzy Lump," where she'd get random on sugar. The take? Stop pretending you hate your phone. Everyone's already addicted, so either turn it off or use it better. The real problem isn't screen time but passive algorithm surfing instead of seeking out the genuinely bizarre stuff that makes the internet rock. Final advice: man up and admit you like watching weird guys online. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=43AA5rsipLo https://www.youtube.com/embed/43AA5rsipLo 120 2025-08-09T16:00:07.000Z 386360 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/company-parties-are-a-setup 2026-04-15T06:58:16.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/46T2Onsfack/maxresdefault.jpg Company parties áre a setup Company parties are surveillance operations disguised as appreciation, according to a straphanger who's convinced HR is lurking in the bathroom with pink slips. "Susan from HR" is supposedly there to identify liabilities, spot who gets drunk and spills secrets, and figure out who's job hunting or flirting with the manager's wife. Kareem pushes back, but the rider insists a real gift would be cold hard cash, not "this bullshit wine and shrimp and caviar." When Kareem admits his work parties usually just serve pizza, the response is swift: "You need to get a better job." The kicker? This conspiracy theorist has been fired before, though not at a company party. For what? "Maybe talking back a little bit." Kareem can definitely see that. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=46T2Onsfack https://www.youtube.com/embed/46T2Onsfack 101 2025-08-07T16:00:12.000Z 1610130 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/every-transplant-should-have-to-volunteer-somewhere 2026-04-15T06:58:21.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/vQ6TOleoCTY/maxresdefault.jpg Every transplant should have to volunteer somewhere A transplant who volunteers for Big Brothers Big Sisters drops what Kareem calls "maybe the only good Subway take": every transplant should have to volunteer somewhere in New York. The rider argues that if the only thing you're contributing is taxes, you're a loser. Kareem agrees and proposes a tiered system. Been to the Brooklyn Mirage? That's three hours of service. Had an aperol spritz on St. Marks? Ten hours. Waited in line for a viral TikTok pastry? Twenty hours minimum. Made the TikTok that created the viral pastry? You might get kicked out entirely. Both agree transplants need to get out of their Williamsburg and East Village bubbles, find something they're passionate about, and give back to the city they claim to love. It's about cleaning up transplants' bad reputation and actually being part of the community. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vQ6TOleoCTY https://www.youtube.com/embed/vQ6TOleoCTY 121 2025-08-06T16:01:49.000Z 725734 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/restaurants-are-scamming-you 2026-04-15T06:58:28.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/6Wqeb3xcpcI/maxresdefault.jpg Restaurants Are Scamming You SNL's Ego Nwodim has had it with restaurants where "the vibe is better than the food." She tells Kareem that these places need a warning sign in the window: "the wall is grass, the food will be trash." She's tired of paying for neon lights and chef backstories when the meals aren't even seasoned properly. Kareem agrees but pushes back on the specifics. He wants white tablecloths, no music, and a large pepper grinder. Ego? She's fine with hip-hop while eating pasta, as long as the food matches the energy. They spar over whether Italian restaurants should play Italian music and whether loud bars are worth the headache. The core take lands hard though: if you can't eat the vibe, call it a vibe center, not a restaurant. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6Wqeb3xcpcI https://www.youtube.com/embed/6Wqeb3xcpcI 174 2025-08-06T14:15:00.000Z 187024 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/motaz-azaiza-the-cameras-much-stronger-than-the-sword-feat-motaz-azaiza 2026-04-15T06:58:32.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/YUNtBe5Al8E/maxresdefault.jpg The camera's much stronger than the sword feat Motaz Azaiza Motaz Azaiza tells Kareem that the camera is much stronger than a sword. It opened the world's eyes to what's happening to his people, though the achievements came through genocide and loss. The conversation shifts when Motaz mentions his size 15 feet. He spent 24 years trying to get boots in Gaza but couldn't find his size, and Israel banned military-style hiking boots anyway. When he finally got to the US, he bought 14 pairs of sneakers in one trip. Revenge shopping. Kareem calls it a guilty pleasure, and both agree Motaz can have as many as he wants. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YUNtBe5Al8E https://www.youtube.com/embed/YUNtBe5Al8E 118 2025-08-05T16:00:55.000Z 395864 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/i-believe-in-an-afterlife-were-currently-in-it-this-is-hell-mikecannoncomedy 2026-04-15T06:58:40.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/wvKJ-_DbE1o/maxresdefault.jpg I believe in an afterlife. We're currently in it. This is hell. @MikeCannonComedy A stranger on the subway opens with a bleak thesis: we're already in the afterlife, and this is hell. Kareem pushes back hard, arguing that anyone doing well would reject this view outright. But the rider doubles down with a grim twist: hope itself makes life hellish because good and bad days are harder than predictable suffering. You'd get "calloused" to constant torment, he claims, but the emotional whiplash of mixed days is unbearable. Even love, "the greatest thing you can experience on this planet," comes with incomprehensible pain. Despite having kids, he admits he tells them life is beautiful while stuffing his true feelings down "like a good Irish man" until they metastasize into something worse. When Kareem suggests he's operating from fear, the guy immediately caves, confessing he has "no belief in my own opinions." He's not okay. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wvKJ-_DbE1o https://www.youtube.com/embed/wvKJ-_DbE1o 117 2025-08-04T16:01:35.000Z 1133705 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/normalize-strangers-holding-babies 2026-04-15T06:58:47.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/ZUrg8qUbrOo/maxresdefault.jpg Normalize Strangers Holding Babies Comedian Gianmarco Soresi has a proposal: let him hold your baby. Not in a creepy way, but as a public service. If you're juggling a stroller, luggage, and fifteen burritos at the airport, he wants to be the stranger who says "I got this" so you can grab your latte in peace. Kareem's skeptical at first, thinking it's just weird baby obsession, but Gianmarco makes his case for village-style parenting in modern New York. He floats ideas like a baby-holding registry or wearing an ankle monitor to prove he's trustworthy. The conversation bounces from stroller etiquette on subway stairs to why helping a frazzled parent should be as normal as holding a door. Gianmarco's already done it once at an audition waiting room. The baby survived. He just wants to normalize finishing what you started when you help someone carry a stroller up the steps. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZUrg8qUbrOo https://www.youtube.com/embed/ZUrg8qUbrOo 154 2025-08-04T14:15:06.000Z 144088 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/fun-socks-arent-fun-anymore 2026-04-15T06:58:53.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/uLm51DeRG2k/maxresdefault.jpg Fun socks aren't fun anymore Fun socks have lost their edge. A straphanger declares they're over, and Kareem couldn't agree more. The turning point? When bookstores started hawking socks with phrases like "Mommy needs wine." They argue fun socks became corporate armor for unfun executives who flash wiener dog patterns at meetings, then get buried in more wiener dog merchandise until "he's buried in a wiener casket." The guest admits he once owned fun socks but now wears solid colors. Kareem fires back that his companion sports fun laces and a fun hat, still clinging to self-expression. The real truth: fun socks were developed in a lab for people who aren't actually fun at all. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uLm51DeRG2k https://www.youtube.com/embed/uLm51DeRG2k 122 2025-08-03T17:20:05.000Z 540003 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/episode-453-were-drinking-too-much-water 2026-04-15T04:49:24.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/4BsD-0494vw/maxresdefault.jpg Episode 453: We're drinking too much water A subway passenger argues that everyone's overdoing the whole hydration thing and we're actually drinking way too much water. They claim the eight glasses a day rule is total BS and people are just mindlessly chugging water because influencers told them to. It gets heated. The host pushes back on whether this take is actually dangerous, but the guest insists our ancestors survived just fine drinking way less. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4BsD-0494vw https://www.youtube.com/embed/4BsD-0494vw 128 2025-08-02T14:22:33.000Z 1473240 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/episode-452-i-think-that-people-should-be-allowed-to-share-underwear 2026-04-15T04:49:28.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/VKsdX6OIo8U/maxresdefault.jpg Episode 452: I think that people should be allowed to share underwear The host meets someone with a wildly controversial hygiene take: sharing underwear should be totally acceptable. The guest argues it's no different from sharing other clothes if you wash them properly, while the host tries not to visibly recoil. Things get heated when laundry habits come up. The internet's definitely going to have opinions on this one, and they won't be kind. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VKsdX6OIo8U https://www.youtube.com/embed/VKsdX6OIo8U 94 2025-08-01T19:32:19.000Z 228331 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/episode-451-i-think-its-okay-to-cut-a-donut-in-half-and-leave-the-other-half-in 2026-04-15T04:49:32.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/6Gd6FC8oc04/maxresdefault.jpg Episode 451: I think it's okay to cut a donut in half and leave the other half in the box A guest defends cutting a donut in half and leaving the remainder in the communal box, sparking debate about office food etiquette. The host pushes back on whether this is actually acceptable or just selfish behavior disguised as portion control. Things get heated when they discuss whether the half donut even counts as a real option for the next person. It's petty but relatable. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6Gd6FC8oc04 https://www.youtube.com/embed/6Gd6FC8oc04 108 2025-08-01T13:59:35.000Z 792372 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/the-customs-and-border-patrol-interrogation-room-atjfk-needs-a-makeover 2026-04-15T06:58:59.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/XvHoMxXDNqc/maxresdefault.jpg The Customs and Border Patrol interrogation room atJFK needs a makeover A Syrian, Arab, Muslim, American architect has spent two decades getting pulled into the interrogation room at JFK, and he's got a proposal: give it a makeover. The stranger tells Kareem about flickering fluorescent lights, busted 1970s desks, and a dusty blue paint job that makes even the officers cranky. His solution? Eames chairs, snake plants, fancy wallpaper. Maybe a Turkish bath. "Good design can solve a lot of the world's problems," he says, acknowledging it won't fix systemic racism but might make the five-hour bag searches slightly less miserable. Kareem pitches a reality show concept on the spot: "Detained," a mashup of Queer Eye and Scared Straight. The idea is simple. Better conditions mean better moods, and everyone benefits when bureaucracy gets a little style. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XvHoMxXDNqc https://www.youtube.com/embed/XvHoMxXDNqc 102 2025-07-31T14:19:04.000Z 1173198 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/pigeons-are-the-ultimate-new-yorkers 2026-04-15T06:59:05.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/z_2B6lN-R0g/maxresdefault.jpg Pigeons are the ultimate New Yorkers Pigeons are the ultimate New Yorkers," a well-dressed woman tells Kareem on the subway. They're smart, they're survivors, and the only difference between pigeons and New Yorkers is sunglasses (and the ability to fly). But the conversation quickly pivots to her real passion: advising lost single women in New York. Her dating wisdom? Skip the apps, show leg, go to bars, and never split the check. "I don't want the guy that can't afford me," she declares, explaining that dates now cost $400 and women need to think highly of themselves. She's clearly successful herself, mentioning she advises clients buying $20 million apartments. Kareem's charmed. She tells him her granddaughter and friends at boarding school all watch SubwayTakes. He's hot stuff, apparently. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=z_2B6lN-R0g https://www.youtube.com/embed/z_2B6lN-R0g 132 2025-07-30T17:45:00.000Z 719657 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/fancy-ketchup-should-be-illegal 2026-04-15T06:59:18.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/DSWlQYIiIis/maxresdefault.jpg Fancy Ketchup Should Be Illegal Paul Scheer has had enough of your artisanal ketchup. The actor and comedian sits down with Kareem to rant about restaurants that think they can improve on Heinz, charging extra for fries that should come with the burger, and serving condiments in portions "like this big" while treating customers "like an animal." They bond over the absurdity of craft ketchup (nobody knows what's in Heinz, and that's exactly why it works), debate whether craft mayo deserves any respect, and nearly derail the entire conversation when Scheer confesses he likes Miracle Whip. "Get off the show," Kareem fires back. It's a full-throated defense of the basics: squeeze bottles, unlimited refills, and the $2 tub of Heinz that never expires. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DSWlQYIiIis https://www.youtube.com/embed/DSWlQYIiIis 142 2025-07-30T14:15:02.000Z 33115 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/episode-448-conservatives-should-get-credit-for-not-gentrifying-neighborhoods 2026-04-15T06:59:24.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/YbIk0bmEJgk/maxresdefault.jpg Episode 448: Conservatives should get credit for not gentrifying neighborhoods A straphanger drops a politically incorrect hot take: conservatives should get credit for not gentrifying neighborhoods. Kareem reluctantly agrees. The logic? Racist people who stay in their Connecticut towns accidentally preserve affordable housing, while well-meaning progressives move to Brooklyn and drive up rents. "I'd rather be dealing with racism and have cheap rent than to be homeless amongst progressives," the rider argues. Nobody wants to live on cardboard outside a vegan doughnut shop. The conversation spirals into whether there's a middle ground, some kind of gentrification with guardrails. One coffee shop, maybe a record store, but no gluten-free bakeries. And definitely a cap on blue-haired residents per capita. When Kareem asks where he lives to avoid this fate, the rider refuses to blow up his spot. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YbIk0bmEJgk https://www.youtube.com/embed/YbIk0bmEJgk 125 2025-07-29T13:58:41.000Z 547434 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/being-loud-should-be-a-crime 2026-04-15T06:59:31.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/ATPZo0Pc1dI/maxresdefault.jpg Being Loud Should Be a Crime Writer Brenda Cullerton is teetering between total dementia and murder, and she's blaming the noise. She wants jackhammers banned before 9:00 a.m., sirens cut to half volume like they are in Europe, and those backup beeps on trucks eliminated entirely. "If you can't see it coming, that's your problem, not the truck's problem," she tells Kareem. Her hit list keeps growing: key fobs that honk, restaurant music you can't talk over, and the constant barrage of horns from drivers who she thinks should be fined via anonymous citizen reports. She proposes a system where New Yorkers can photograph license plates and send violators straight to the DMV for punishment. Kareem's on board with all of it, even suggesting she run for mayor. Cullerton invokes Mayor Koch's old "Don't even think of honking here" signs as proof this problem is solvable. Tax the honkers. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ATPZo0Pc1dI https://www.youtube.com/embed/ATPZo0Pc1dI 176 2025-07-28T14:15:01.000Z 30340 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/we-gotta-stop-using-the-word-uncircumcised-and-call-them-hatty-dicks 2026-04-15T06:59:37.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/Qvbu6fFEd5o/maxresdefault.jpg We gotta stop using the word "uncircumcised" and call them "hatty dicks" A stranger makes his case for rebranding uncircumcised penises as "natty dicks," arguing that society celebrates natural everything except when it comes to male anatomy. He's passionate about ending the shame. His evidence? People don't tear the skin off chicken drumsticks before eating them, and girlfriends always steal the hoodie, not the crew neck. Kareem seems mostly on board with the logic, though the conversation takes a turn when hygiene comes up (blue cheese, anyone?). The rider insists he's not anti-circumcision, just pro-choice, which is tough when babies can't consent. He's giving 100%, literally, since he didn't have 3% trimmed off at birth. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Qvbu6fFEd5o https://www.youtube.com/embed/Qvbu6fFEd5o 101 2025-07-28T14:13:59.000Z 201969 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/first-time-hook-ups-no-music 2026-04-15T06:59:43.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/V-jHixYNw-U/maxresdefault.jpg First time hook ups: No music A rider with a strong opinion defends playing music during first-time hookups, but Kareem isn't convinced. The conversation spirals into comedic territory when Kareem admits he can't perform to D'Angelo's "How Does It Feel?" because "what about the twin bed on the floor made you think this was going to be a D'Angelo night?" The stranger suggests training himself to one specific song, like "Crash Into Me" by Dave Matthews. Kareem immediately identifies the flaw in this plan: he'd develop a Pavlovian response and end up busting in his pants whenever the song plays in public, creating what he calls "a clean up on aisle in a cafe." It's a ridiculous premise that gets even more ridiculous. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=V-jHixYNw-U https://www.youtube.com/embed/V-jHixYNw-U 118 2025-07-26T14:14:27.000Z 1863528 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/episode-445-when-we-go-to-war-there-should-be-a-draft-and-it-should-be-based-on 2026-04-15T06:59:48.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/w8hpqpwlwmY/maxresdefault.jpg Episode 445: When we go to war, there should be a draft and it should be based on your Uber rating A straphanger proposes that the next military draft should rank soldiers by their Uber rating, sending low-rated passengers like "Becky who throws up in the back of Ubers" straight to the front lines. Kareem entertains the chaos. The rider expands his vision: bad tippers go too, along with anyone who got hair plugs in Turkey or underwent plastic surgery. Delta Platinum Medallion members? Exempt. The conversation spirals through an unaccompanied minor watching porn on a flight, the sacred handshake between Delta loyalists, and a defense of "God soldiers" who traveled abroad for hair transplants. It's unhinged patriotism meets airline status hierarchies. The rider insists his America is "pretty tight, dude. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=w8hpqpwlwmY https://www.youtube.com/embed/w8hpqpwlwmY 131 2025-07-25T17:18:21.000Z 611780 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/everyone-should-get-a-full-month-off-in-the-summer 2026-04-15T04:50:07.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/XzM3_r6vZ3w/maxresdefault.jpg Everyone should get a full month off in the summer The host meets a passenger who thinks everyone deserves a mandatory month off during summer, no exceptions. They argue it'd boost mental health and productivity way more than scattered vacation days throughout the year. The conversation gets spicy when they compare American work culture to European standards. Their take is simple but bold. Would bosses ever actually go for it though? https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XzM3_r6vZ3w https://www.youtube.com/embed/XzM3_r6vZ3w 124 2025-07-24T15:46:32.000Z 844834 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/stop-making-guests-take-their-shoes-off 2026-04-15T04:50:10.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/9YgH0VZ4Id8/maxresdefault.jpg Stop Making Guests Take Their Shoes Off Beauty editor Tish Weinstock goes off on the ultimate hosting faux pas: making guests take their shoes off. She tells host Kareem Rahma that shoes complete the outfit and feet are too intimate to expose at parties. Guest slippers? That's even worse. The conversation covers house party rules, shoe culture, and why socks kill the vibe. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9YgH0VZ4Id8 https://www.youtube.com/embed/9YgH0VZ4Id8 259 2025-07-23T14:15:01.000Z 47005 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/if-youre-sick-and-you-tell-me-its-just-allergies-and-then-i-find-out-youre-sick 2026-04-15T04:50:13.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/2kTxU5jBNws/maxresdefault.jpg If you're sick and you tell me it's just allergies and then I find out you're sick The guest has strong feelings about friends who claim they're just dealing with allergies when they're actually sick. It's a total betrayal of trust. If you're contagious, just say it. Don't expose everyone around you and act like seasonal sniffles are the problem when you've got a full blown illness. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2kTxU5jBNws https://www.youtube.com/embed/2kTxU5jBNws 136 2025-07-23T13:18:40.000Z 3245882 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/stop-discriminating-against-hot-nannies 2026-04-15T06:59:54.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/oiCykg4o-3A/maxresdefault.jpg Stop discriminating against hot nannies A self-described hot nanny confronts Kareem about discrimination in childcare hiring, insisting she's got 20 years of experience (she picked up her first poo from her nephew at age 9). Kareem's not buying it. He wants a grandma nanny, someone with 40 years under her belt, specifically because he doesn't want the distraction of an attractive caregiver around his hypothetical Egyptian baby. The straphanger makes her pitch anyway, offering spiritual nourishment, physical grounding, and a willingness to adapt her wardrobe to household vibes. She's been celibate for a year and a half, her energy closed off to men but wide open to babies. Kareem remains skeptical but tells her to email her resume. The whole exchange plays like an absurd job interview conducted at high speed on the subway. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oiCykg4o-3A https://www.youtube.com/embed/oiCykg4o-3A 129 2025-07-22T15:18:01.000Z 1046344 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/jesus-wouldnt-vote-for-trump 2026-04-15T07:00:08.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/Frb-fo6ugp0/maxresdefault.jpg Jesus Wouldn’t Vote for Trump Steve Coogan has some thoughts about American Christianity. The British actor and comedian tells Kareem that Jesus wasn't white, wasn't American, and definitely wasn't a Republican. He points out that Jesus threw the money lenders out of the temple and said it's easier for a camel to pass through the eye of a needle than for a rich man to enter heaven. Not exactly MAGA material. The two riff on how modern conservatives have rebranded Christ in their own image, debate whether Jesus would've had a podcast (probably better than Joe Rogan's), and discuss the ascension. Coogan admits he doesn't believe Jesus floated up into the clouds because "if you go up there, it's just sky." They land on Jesus as a probable independent, maybe a democratic socialist. Definitely not a libertarian. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Frb-fo6ugp0 https://www.youtube.com/embed/Frb-fo6ugp0 356 2025-07-21T14:15:02.000Z 95370 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/f-your-job-doesnt-offer-health-caresneeze-at-work 2026-04-15T07:00:14.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/p-rT2bXPe6k/maxresdefault.jpg F Your Job Doesn't Offer Health Care…sneeze at Work A straphanger shares his aggressive strategy for workplace healthcare advocacy: if your job doesn't offer health insurance, don't cover your mouth when you sneeze. It's "gorilla warfare," he tells Kareem. The logic is simple. Get everyone sick, force mass callouts, and suddenly your boss is the one stuck restocking shelves and cleaning Chipotle toilets. He's even willing to "turn that staph infection into a staph infection" and steal his boss's medicine if needed. What about innocent coworkers with kids? Casualties of war. The solution is a company-wide memo warning immunocompromised employees to stay home while he spreads the flu as what he calls "peaceful protest." No one has to die, he insists, unless you're immunocompromised. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=p-rT2bXPe6k https://www.youtube.com/embed/p-rT2bXPe6k 120 2025-07-21T14:12:54.000Z 747986 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/theres-no-such-thing-as-being-a-bad-texter 2026-04-15T07:00:20.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/Vb-b7U1dGCs/maxresdefault.jpg There's no such thing as being a bad texter A straphanger drops a spicy take: there's no such thing as being a bad texter. They just don't want to respond. Kareem immediately disagrees, calling out the whole "bad texter" identity as pure BS. He's got receipts. When a so-called bad texter gets a crush? Suddenly they're the best texter in the world. When they need something from you? Lightning-fast responses. The conversation spirals into texting etiquette, with Kareem defending memes as a love language while his debate partner admits they ghost anyone who sends one. Things get weirdly specific when Kareem throws out a bonus take: the horniest move on social media is doing a location check-in on Instagram notes. "That's pretty much saying I'm available and I'm ready to get texted." A perfectly chaotic dissection of modern dating communication. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Vb-b7U1dGCs https://www.youtube.com/embed/Vb-b7U1dGCs 120 2025-07-20T13:34:26.000Z 1469969 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/its-okay-to-eat-food-on-the-train-as-long-as-its-not-hot 2026-04-15T07:00:28.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/RCL6lSK0iko/maxresdefault.jpg It's okay to eat food on the train, as long as it's not hot A straphanger argues it's fine to eat on the subway as long as it's not hot food. Cold cereal? Sure. A bowl of Rice Krispies? Someone's done it. But lamb over rice with white sauce is crossing the line. Kareem pushes back on the logic, questioning whether sushi with chopsticks or a vinegary salad would really be acceptable, but the rider stands firm on his temperature-based etiquette rule. The conversation spirals into legendary subway sightings, including "Pastrami Mommy," a woman eating raw cold cuts straight from the package who earned her nickname from fellow passengers in what sounds like a post-ride committee meeting. They debate whether subway churros are ever actually warm (they're not, apparently), and somehow land on a tangent about Dennis the Menace eating beans under a bridge. It's an Oscar-worthy scene, the rider insists. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RCL6lSK0iko https://www.youtube.com/embed/RCL6lSK0iko 115 2025-07-19T14:10:45.000Z 937128 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/episode-438-no-more-potlucks 2026-04-15T07:00:33.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/83usEdvR4pI/maxresdefault.jpg Episode 438: No more potlucks A straphanger declares war on potlucks, and Kareem couldn't disagree more. The rider, who reveals she's Persian, argues there's "an art to a dinner party" and can't stand the chaos of mismatched Tupperware and random dishes showing up together. She'd rather "swing my big dick" and bring her delicious lasagna to impress everyone. Kareem, who admits he can't cook, loves potlucks for exactly that reason. He's happy to let other people handle the food. The cultural reveal clicks everything into place: Persians want the big fancy table with coordinated dishes, not some random protein next to questionable potato salad. It's about poetry, not practicality. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=83usEdvR4pI https://www.youtube.com/embed/83usEdvR4pI 108 2025-07-18T15:34:53.000Z 1137510 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/southern-racists-are-nicer-than-nyc-racists 2026-04-15T07:00:42.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/OgpHeEpDnJg/maxresdefault.jpg Southern Racists Are Nicer Than NYC Racists W. Kamau Bell thinks every American should spend two weeks a year in the South, and he's not talking about Atlanta or Nashville. He means Shreveport, Tallahassee, Mobile. Kareem pushes back hard, calling himself a "South Dodger" who can get gumbo in Queens just fine. But Bell argues that New Yorkers live in a bubble of moral superiority while most TV already shows them the North. The conversation takes a sharp turn when Bell claims "southern racists, when they're not killing you, are some of the nicest racists" compared to loud, mean New York racists. They'll serve you sweet tea and grits, say "bless your heart," then talk behind your back. Bell, who lives in Oakland but visits his dad in the South, rattles off specifics: Alabama's beaches, the "redneck Riviera," Waffle House over sushi bars. He even points out that most Black Americans live in the South, so hating on it means being anti-Black. Kareem's convinced. Sort of. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OgpHeEpDnJg https://www.youtube.com/embed/OgpHeEpDnJg 236 2025-07-18T14:15:02.000Z 178856 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/episode-437-southern-culture-and-arab-culture-are-cut-from-the-same-cloth 2026-04-15T07:00:48.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/JEIXYiS80W0/maxresdefault.jpg Episode 437: Southern culture and Arab culture are cut from the same cloth A rider from South Carolina argues that Southern culture and Arab culture are cut from the same cloth, rattling off similarities that catch Kareem off guard. Family orientation. Hospitality to the point of aggression, especially around food. Line dancing and dupit. Even the quietly racist kind of niceness that's more about being polite than actually good. The guest admits Southerners wouldn't like hearing this comparison, then drops another parallel: tias and grandmothers secretly running the show in both cultures, the hand-asking formality when you want to marry someone, the prevalence of big families. Kareem's intrigued enough to joke about swapping his Egypt trip for Georgia instead. The conversation veers into whether Cletus is racist against Southerners. It's a wild pitch that somehow lands. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JEIXYiS80W0 https://www.youtube.com/embed/JEIXYiS80W0 123 2025-07-17T13:18:14.000Z 2736723 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/dont-give-me-a-hot-dog-without-the-sauerkraut 2026-04-15T07:00:54.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/jVAxiEsyd7s/maxresdefault.jpg Don't give me a hot dog without the sauerkraut A straphanger declares that you can't have a hot dog without sauerkraut, and Kareem's initially skeptical. The rider isn't messing around. He makes his own sauerkraut, fermenting cabbage in mason jars with phytochemicals and antioxidants. He carries it in his pocket. When Kareem admits he's never actually tried sauerkraut because it looks weird, the rider whips out his homemade batch right there on the train and offers a taste. Kareem tries it. It's actually delicious. Total conversion. "I would put that on my hot dog every day of the week," Kareem says, won over by the fermented cabbage evangelism. Then the rider mentions ketchup, which Kareem draws the line at. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jVAxiEsyd7s https://www.youtube.com/embed/jVAxiEsyd7s 106 2025-07-16T16:14:53.000Z 780165 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/introverts-are-morally-weak-2 2026-04-15T04:50:53.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/OzjNE5toTfQ/maxresdefault.jpg Introverts are morally weak A guest drops the provocative claim that introverts are morally weak, sparking a heated debate about personality types and character. They argue that avoiding social interaction is selfish and that real courage means pushing through discomfort. The host pushes back on whether preferring solitude really equals moral failure. Things get spicy when other passengers jump in to defend introverts. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OzjNE5toTfQ https://www.youtube.com/embed/OzjNE5toTfQ 104 2025-07-15T16:37:03.000Z 523427 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/bill-burr-says-stop-blaming-immigrants-blame-billionaires 2026-04-15T07:01:12.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/fLlSVk2IS5E/maxresdefault.jpg Bill Burr Says Stop Blaming Immigrants, Blame Billionaires Bill Burr hits the subway with Kareem Rahma for a characteristically unfiltered conversation that ricochets from Bloomberg's "Illuminati meeting" in Europe to why cable news has Americans shooting rubber bullets at their own countrymen. The comedian refuses to move to Brooklyn because he won't be "another white guy that ruins a neighborhood," jokes about his "white privilege" sculpture at Hudson Yards, and delivers a blistering bit about immigration that forces Kareem to clarify he's joking. Burr's real take? When deportations happen, "white billionaires will then magically become generous and start paying people a living wage because they inadvertently got rid of their excuse." The comedy legend argues Americans have been manipulated into hating each other across state lines while missing the simple truth that most people just want enough money for food and safety. He calls out the tribalism: "We are so divided because of CNN and Fox News that as long as the bullets are going at the countrymen that are wearing the wrong tie, you somehow don't view them as on your team anymore." Classic Burr, zero chill. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fLlSVk2IS5E https://www.youtube.com/embed/fLlSVk2IS5E 797 2025-07-15T14:15:07.000Z 1311837 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/ghosting-is-not-okay 2026-04-15T07:01:19.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/jvtxLYKg6-I/maxresdefault.jpg Ghosting is not okay Ghosting is not okay, declares a straphanger who's ready to throw down with Alexa Chung's take on the matter. She tells Kareem that anyone comfortable with ghosting is a "ghostaster," though she'll grant one exception: the mutual ghost after a single bad date where both parties vanish simultaneously. Still, disappearing after a date that seemed to go well, complete with a kiss, is just plain rude. The conversation spirals into the impossibility of truly ghosting in the digital age. You can't hide anymore. She once tracked down a guy who tried to ghost her by watching him run the marathon using his bib number. Modern technology has killed the ghost. Even death won't save you now, she argues, since AI can resurrect you for conversation. Her verdict? Dating's tough enough without adding cruelty to the mix. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jvtxLYKg6-I https://www.youtube.com/embed/jvtxLYKg6-I 128 2025-07-14T15:12:08.000Z 1155493 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/humans-should-sleep-in-dog-beds 2026-04-15T07:01:28.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/dCIpOv0rC2w/maxresdefault.jpg Humans Should Sleep In Dog Beds Comedian Claire Sundbye spent years sleeping in a hammock and then an extra-large dog bed before society pressured her into buying a real mattress. Her crime? Wanting to date. Recorded on the Chicago L train, she tells Kareem that beds are an overpriced scam engineered by Big Bed, ranting about the absurd upkeep required: bed frames, headboards, mattresses, mattress covers, sheets upon sheets, and the revelation that you're supposed to wash bedding once a week. The dog bed cost her $70. No sheets needed. She'd sleep on a couch over a bed any day. Kareem pushes back hard, defending hotels and proper sleep setups, but Claire's not budging. She admits she finally caved and bought a full bed with a metal frame after dates refused to hook up on the dog bed, though she confesses to sleeping on just the mattress with towels instead of sheets and possibly scamming the delivery. Her back hurts, her posture's terrible, and she misses her dog bed every single day. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dCIpOv0rC2w https://www.youtube.com/embed/dCIpOv0rC2w 247 2025-07-14T14:15:03.000Z 37341 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/its-okay-to-applaud-or-cheer-when-your-plane-land-atsukocomedy 2026-04-15T07:01:34.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/rR5f5R1nzlw/maxresdefault.jpg It's okay to applaud or cheer when your plane land. @AtsukoComedy A straphanger makes the case that we should absolutely cheer when planes land, and Kareem's fully on board. Flight is a miracle, they argue, so why treat it like business as usual? We're sitting in a giant metal bird traveling at ridiculous speeds. Broadway shows get standing ovations and they don't even leave the ground. The conversation spirals into thanking pilots more enthusiastically, maybe even slipping them $100 to ensure they're in a good mood. Life is hard. Show the pilot a picture of their own kid, compliment their looks, suggest grabbing a drink when you land. Ghost them later if needed. Whatever it takes to celebrate being alive and airborne. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rR5f5R1nzlw https://www.youtube.com/embed/rR5f5R1nzlw 123 2025-07-13T13:26:51.000Z 982204 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/cheese-is-overrated 2026-04-15T07:01:39.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/-ISRlIzRQBg/maxresdefault.jpg Cheese is overrated A straphanger unleashes a scorching hot take: cheese is overrated. Kareem can't believe it. The anonymous rider doubles down hard, calling parmesan "foot powder" and refusing cheese on everything from bacon egg sandwiches to burritos. He admits he worked at McDonald's and ordered the number two with no cheese, which he's "pretty sure" is why he got fired. The only exemption? Pizza gets a pass. Kareem pushes back relentlessly, questioning the guy's hamburger preference and trying to sell him on Gouda, queso, and mozzarella sticks, but the rider won't budge. His mom's on his team, apparently. The debate gets heated when Kareem suggests he's being anti-Italian, prompting quick backpedaling. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-ISRlIzRQBg https://www.youtube.com/embed/-ISRlIzRQBg 116 2025-07-12T18:28:09.000Z 649810 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/episode-432-we-should-turn-off-the-internet-for-5-years-for-everyone 2026-04-15T07:01:47.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/UQEqARekMdM/maxresdefault.jpg Episode 432: We should turn off the internet for 5 years for everyone A straphanger proposes shutting down the internet for five years because "we lost our privileges" and everyone's brains are too rotted. Kareem pushes back hard, invoking American freedom and comparing the internet to gun rights. The stranger offers a gradual return: email after one year of good behavior, streaming stays intact, but social media goes dark. They debate what people did before: throwing rocks versus reading books. Then things get weird. The conversation pivots to conspiracy theories, landing on the take that QAnon functions like Lord of the Rings for the right, complete with deep lore and online forums. The stranger even connects Q to Eru Ilúvatar from the Silmarillion. Kareem jokes about hand-drawing memes and delivering them in person. It's unhinged, nostalgic, and somehow both serious and completely absurd. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UQEqARekMdM https://www.youtube.com/embed/UQEqARekMdM 128 2025-07-12T17:41:12.000Z 454830 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/emily-ratajkowski-all-nudes-should-be-deleted-once-a-relationship-ends-feat-emily-ratajkowski 2026-04-15T07:01:54.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/vv4Do9gk4Vw/maxresdefault.jpg All nudes should be deleted once a relationship ends. Feat Emily Ratajkowski Emily Ratajkowski brings a spicy take about relationship nudes that gets an immediate pushback from a married straphanger who declares himself "anti-nude" across the board. He's not keeping exes' photos because he deletes everything on sight, even unsolicited pics that pop up while he's typing emails at work. Emily argues the only reasons to hold onto nudes are creepy ones, whether it's still using them or wielding them as power, noting that revenge porn is real. The conversation pivots hard when Emily suggests men should embrace aesthetic procedures like hair plugs and facials to even out beauty standards, maybe even blow the whole system up. She's got specific preferences too: long legs, thick thighs, and covered ankles on men. The straphanger agrees, hijab-style. They land on common ground about deleting nudes, though his reasoning involves taking the Quran seriously, which catches Emily off guard. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vv4Do9gk4Vw https://www.youtube.com/embed/vv4Do9gk4Vw 134 2025-07-11T18:44:39.000Z 227195 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/therapists-shouldnt-be-hot 2026-04-15T07:02:03.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/YDJpkKNVaGE/maxresdefault.jpg Therapists Shouldn't Be Hot Comedian Dan Carney has a radical theory: therapists shouldn't be hot. At all. When you're attracted to your therapist, he tells Kareem, you're suddenly doing push-ups in the lobby and lying about your life for sympathy points instead of being vulnerable. He's switched to older therapists, but that backfired too. One session with an elderly therapist turned into explaining what GrubHub is and helping her set up a Roku. He literally started watching her dogs. Hot or old, the pattern repeats: he falls in love, gets too attached, and the therapeutic relationship collapses. His ideal? "An asexual freak." The conversation spirals through why young therapists are useless, why he quit a phone-only therapist after falling for her voice like the movie Her, and why he had to stop seeing a therapist who got seriously ill. Can't complain about your problems when someone's dying. She still has his Hulu password. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YDJpkKNVaGE https://www.youtube.com/embed/YDJpkKNVaGE 245 2025-07-10T14:15:05.000Z 48564 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/if-a-movie-theater-doesnt-have-an-icee-machine-i-think-its-a-front 2026-04-15T07:02:10.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/WAFgpv6Hw6w/maxresdefault.jpg If a movie theater doesn't have an ICEE machine, I think it's a front A straphanger's hot take about ICEE machines quickly spirals into a confession about eating things from "every orifice" in his body. It starts innocently enough: any movie theater without an ICEE is probably a front, though he'd settle for bringing his own if they wouldn't confiscate it. Kareem pushes back, suggesting theaters can't all afford the machines. The guy insists on ICEEs and Junior Mints as his go-to snacks, which Kareem finds bizarre. Then things get weird. The rider admits to biting his nails and swallowing them for "nutrients and vitamins and dirt," sniffing earwax, eating boogers, and yes, tasting his own cum. His philosophy? "If you haven't tried your own come ones, you're not living." Kareem can only laugh at how far they've strayed from movie theater snacks. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WAFgpv6Hw6w https://www.youtube.com/embed/WAFgpv6Hw6w 108 2025-07-09T15:22:41.000Z 680035 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/today-its-impossible-to-keep-a-secret 2026-04-15T07:02:16.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/FLEJ16lKxqI/maxresdefault.jpg Today it's impossible to keep a secret It's impossible to keep a secret," a straphanger tells Kareem, and the conversation spirals into the art of confidential information in the internet age. The solution? Tell secrets only to strangers who don't know the people involved. Or your mama. Kareem tries to extract a secret from the rider and his friend, suggesting they could tell "the world" on mic, but they wisely decline. The pair do confirm they share at least one secret between them. The rider floats a bizarre movie concept: gathering all the mamas of the world in one room, which would theoretically contain every secret on earth. Kareem and the rider agree it probably shouldn't be a film. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FLEJ16lKxqI https://www.youtube.com/embed/FLEJ16lKxqI 109 2025-07-08T18:15:38.000Z 351880 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/being-a-best-man-is-not-not-an-honor 2026-04-15T07:02:22.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/w235M7FxswQ/maxresdefault.jpg Being a best man is NOT not an honor Being a best man is indentured servitude, according to a rider who's been a groomsman six times but only best man once. He explains the role's origins: in the 1600s, best men fought off wife-stealers at the altar. That's an honor. Now? It means someone thinks you're good at party planning and making sure the groom eats. Kareem, a self-described lone wolf, skipped having a best man entirely. The conversation spirals through the absurdity of being asked to help move apartments on top of wedding duties, with the rider convinced his friend picked him not for friendship but for competence. The other options included a possible alcoholic and a guy who called the fiancée "that woman." Groomsman is easy. Best man is work disguised as flattery. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=w235M7FxswQ https://www.youtube.com/embed/w235M7FxswQ 114 2025-07-08T17:11:17.000Z 1168346 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/men-are-more-hysterical-than-women 2026-04-15T07:02:36.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/RC6egz7l12U/maxresdefault.jpg Men Are More Hysterical Than Women Abdullah Saeed, creator of Deli Boys, makes a provocative claim: men are the truly hysterical gender. He points to road rage, wall punching, and explosive anger as proof that men handle emotions far worse than women, who actually process feelings in healthy ways by crying and moving on. The conversation turns dark when Abdullah reveals his immigrant father never said "I love you" except maybe once a year on his birthday, and he died when Abdullah was 27. That's 21 times total. Kareem and Abdullah debate solutions, disagreeing on therapy versus exercise, but landing on men's emotional support groups. Maybe even sleepovers with the boys? Abdullah draws the line there, needing those last couple hours of the night to himself. The real issue, they argue, is that men in power are driven by unprocessed anger and inner emptiness, which explains why society's in such rough shape. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RC6egz7l12U https://www.youtube.com/embed/RC6egz7l12U 209 2025-07-08T14:15:06.000Z 152780 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/aymann-ismail-the-sexiest-thing-somebody-can-do-is-say-im-sorry-i-was-wrong-feat-aymann-ismail 2026-04-15T07:02:42.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/Xi8Q_VqODUA/maxresdefault.jpg The sexiest thing somebody can do is say “I’m sorry, I was wrong.” Feat Aymann Ismail Aymann Ismail claims the sexiest thing someone can do is say "I'm sorry, I was wrong." Kareem pushes back. What about being naked in bed? The two debate whether admitting fault is truly attractive or just necessary, with Ismail revealing he only started apologizing two years ago when he became a dad. The turning point came on day one of fatherhood when he tried to mansplain feeding to his wife, made her cry, and had to learn humility fast. They agree that saying sorry makes families happier and marriages stronger, though they spar over whether it's harder for men or women to own up to mistakes. It's vulnerable. It works. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Xi8Q_VqODUA https://www.youtube.com/embed/Xi8Q_VqODUA 123 2025-07-07T16:52:47.000Z 583223 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/theres-no-such-thing-as-the-best-coffee-or-bagel-or-pizza-slice-in-new-york-city 2026-04-15T07:02:50.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/aw-1SExfJZY/maxresdefault.jpg There’s no such thing as the best coffee or bagel or pizza slice in New York City A straphanger delivers a fiery anti-list manifesto: there's no single best bagel, pizza, or coffee in New York, just good spots everywhere, and waiting in line for any of them is "absurd." Kareem pushes back. The debate spirals into line culture, vibe gatekeeping, and whether New Yorkers have lost their minds standing outside bars. The rider's take? Lists are garbage made for out-of-towners, and "the thing that's closest to your house that's really good is the best one." Kareem disagrees on principle but gets behind the anti-line sentiment, though he admits he's a vibe guy who'll wait if the energy's right. They name-drop specific spots (Carmines for pizza, Nova Bagel) and run into Isaac Likes mid-interview. Short and spicy. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aw-1SExfJZY https://www.youtube.com/embed/aw-1SExfJZY 135 2025-07-06T13:46:42.000Z 1486664 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/hugs-are-way-more-intimate-than-la-bise 2026-04-15T07:02:56.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/kbGaIKsKChw/maxresdefault.jpg Hugs are way more intimate than la bise A French rider schools Kareem on la bise, the casual cheek-kiss greeting that replaces handshakes across France. She argues hugs are way more intimate than the quick air-kiss, which she describes as "barely a handshake" but with your mouth. Kareem's intrigued. The two debate whether America should adopt the custom (we took French fries, why not this?) and test the intimacy theory with a hypothetical: what would a soldier's wife do before he left for war? "A [__] mouth kiss, baby," Kareem declares. Not la bise. They practice the greeting together on camera. Arabs do three kisses, some southern French regions do three, but two feels right. It's fast, efficient, acknowledgment without commitment. Kareem's sold: "That's so sick. I'm never saying hello again. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kbGaIKsKChw https://www.youtube.com/embed/kbGaIKsKChw 94 2025-07-05T17:07:46.000Z 174767 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/you-are-not-better-than-other-people-if-youre-efficient-in-a-tsa-line 2026-04-15T07:03:03.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/FjJYDA0NEuE/maxresdefault.jpg You are not better than other people if you're efficient in a TSA line A straphanger has a bold take: people who act superior in TSA lines are "actually upholding the legacy of Osama bin Laden." Her argument? 9/11 created airport security, and now impatient travelers yelling at slower people in line are exactly the kind of division the attacks were meant to cause. Kareem pushes back immediately, insisting that TSA efficiency absolutely makes you a better person. The debate spirals into the contradictions of modern air travel: she admits she accidentally got pressured into signing up for Clear and now uses it despite hating the principle, sometimes the laptop comes out and sometimes it doesn't, and LaGuardia TSA agents yell at confused passengers like it's their fault the rules keep changing. Her plea for compassion in security lines is hard to argue with. Water costs $12. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FjJYDA0NEuE https://www.youtube.com/embed/FjJYDA0NEuE 115 2025-07-05T14:06:16.000Z 578628 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/the-seagull-should-replace-the-bald-eagle-as-our-national-bird 2026-04-15T07:03:10.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/2q7KakChKBE/maxresdefault.jpg The seagull should replace the bald eagle as our national bird A straphanger makes the case that seagulls should replace bald eagles as America's national bird. The argument? Seagulls are scrappy, resilient, and honest about what Americans really are. They're "feathered capitalism by any means," stealing food and thriving anywhere from dumps to parking lots. The rider recalls a seagull swooping down to steal a hot dog right out of their hands. Kareem admits he's never seen a bald eagle in the wild. Nobody has. Meanwhile, seagulls are everywhere, unfenced and free. The conversation ends with plans to launch a Change.org petition. Day one of the campaign starts here. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2q7KakChKBE https://www.youtube.com/embed/2q7KakChKBE 114 2025-07-04T14:53:08.000Z 2264189 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/memes-are-art 2026-04-15T07:03:14.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/eHA-lqO9hH4/maxresdefault.jpg Memes are art A self-proclaimed meme lord with eight years of experience argues that memes deserve their own wing at the Louvre. Not just sprinkled around. The anonymous rider explains to Kareem that memes aren't just funny internet jokes but a legitimate form of communication and art, democratized so anyone can create them. When Kareem suggests Picasso would've been a meme lord today, the rider counters with Andy Warhol, who "taped a banana on the wall." The conversation ends with a deal: the rider will create a one-of-one SubwayTakes meme making fun of Kareem in Paris, and Kareem agrees to buy it. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eHA-lqO9hH4 https://www.youtube.com/embed/eHA-lqO9hH4 104 2025-07-03T18:40:29.000Z 264982 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/episode-420-we-need-to-de-legalize-pot 2026-04-15T07:03:19.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/U8f_1k2w2zM/maxresdefault.jpg Episode 420: We need to de-legalize pot A rider thinks we need to "de-legalize pot," and Kareem immediately agrees. The complaint? Weed got too corporate. "I don't want to walk into the Apple store of weed," the passenger says, arguing that modern dispensaries killed the charm of texting "Manny the plug" with a little green leaf emoji. Both agree substances should stay decriminalized, just not capitalized. The buddies made it too strong anyway. One hit and you're greening out. The rider shares their last experience: hiding in the woods for two to three hours after their friend's mom came home, convinced texts saying she wasn't mad were "a setup." They haven't touched it since. Kareem gets it. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=U8f_1k2w2zM https://www.youtube.com/embed/U8f_1k2w2zM 100 2025-07-03T14:24:13.000Z 1328974 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/yung-lean-says-diddy-ruined-parties-forever 2026-04-15T07:03:29.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/f64cQvf7-og/maxresdefault.jpg Yung Lean Says Diddy Ruined Parties Forever Yung Lean tells Kareem the party is officially over. The Swedish rapper, 366 days sober, wants to make it cool again to settle down, carve wood, and find God instead of "being in a dark hole, we all sniffing K." He blames the "sheer diddiness of it all" for ruining excess forever. They agree society took celebrity worship too far and that male loneliness is the number one epidemic. The solution? Russian Turkish bathhouses with the boys, touching grass, putting your feet in the sand, and choosing God over fear. Yung Lean's still with the gang sometimes, but he's romanticizing tea over freak offs. The ketamine era is done. It's time for humility, gratitude, and brotherly love. Also, Martha Stewart has a reptile living in her brain. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=f64cQvf7-og https://www.youtube.com/embed/f64cQvf7-og 286 2025-07-03T14:15:06.000Z 261389 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/polyamory-dont-count-if-its-in-a-big-city 2026-04-15T07:03:35.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/PRfrkQKTq5w/maxresdefault.jpg Polyamory don't count if it's in a big city A straphanger with Zimbabwean polygamist roots delivers a scorching take: polyamory doesn't count in big cities. His logic? Having a polycule in Brooklyn is like being a Republican in Texas, unimpressive and trying too hard. "If you're a polycule at Piggly Wiggly, then you lit," he tells Kareem, arguing that polyamory only matters in places like Pensacola, Florida. The conversation spirals into whether "hoe" is actually the highest relationship tier, the exhausting logistics of poly group chats, and his brutal assessment of New Yorkers with "Polly" in their Instagram bio: "It just means you smell like skin." He's never been poly himself. Not enough hoes, and frankly, he can barely keep up with his existing group chats. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PRfrkQKTq5w https://www.youtube.com/embed/PRfrkQKTq5w 123 2025-07-02T17:16:37.000Z 198123 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/cool-people-from-weird-small-towns-are-cooler-than-cool-people-from-like-big-coo 2026-04-15T07:03:41.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/zWDO7ufIS-A/maxresdefault.jpg Cool people from weird, small towns are cooler than cool people from, like, big, cool towns A stranger from Mobile, Alabama makes the case that cool people from weird small towns are inherently cooler than cool people from big cities. Her logic? They had to work for it. She tells Kareem that developing taste in music, fashion, and politics in some random Iowa place is way harder than in New York, where culture is so accessible you'd have to actively try to stay uncool. It's like hot people peaking in high school. Kareem, who grew up surrounded by blonde Abercrombie guys in the Midwest, gets it completely. They trade examples of small-town icons who made it out: Bob Dylan from Duluth, Prince from Minnesota. The guest, a hijabi who somehow survived Mobile, argues that when you work for coolness instead of having it handed to you, it's more authentic. Plus it feels better. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zWDO7ufIS-A https://www.youtube.com/embed/zWDO7ufIS-A 117 2025-07-01T15:15:21.000Z 1524076 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/rise-grind-is-oppression 2026-04-15T07:03:49.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/YWcowG93faU/maxresdefault.jpg Rise & Grind Is Oppression Comedian and writer Zainne Saleh has a provocative take: morning supremacy is misogynist. Kareem, a natural 6 a.m. riser who hasn't used an alarm in a decade, plays the perfect foil as Zainne tears into hustle culture's obsession with early wake-ups. She argues that 30% of people are natural night owls, that sleep studies ignore women's needs (9 to 11 hours versus men's 8), and that forcing everyone onto the same schedule kills productivity. The conversation spirals from Pakistan's circadian rhythms to Egypt's post-lunch horizontal hour to a hilarious riff on capitalism limiting the worm supply. Let girls sleep. Let brown people chill. Zainne's too tired to fight capitalism, but she's wide awake for dismantling the grindset myth. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YWcowG93faU https://www.youtube.com/embed/YWcowG93faU 287 2025-07-01T14:15:05.000Z 133183 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/sides-at-restaurant-should-not-only-be-free-they-should-be-mandatory 2026-04-15T07:03:55.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/fuLmWaw5kAY/maxresdefault.jpg Sides at restaurant should not only be free, they should be mandatory A subway rider insists that sides at restaurants should be free and mandatory, launching into an impassioned defense that's equal parts nutritional concern and anti-capitalist manifesto. The conversation starts simple enough: sides are the best part of any meal, and calling them "sides" doesn't even make sense if they're sold separately. But things escalate quickly. The rider argues that protein-only entrees lead to hard poops, which cause colon cancer, meaning restaurants are literally trying to kill us by charging extra for greens. Fiber matters. Then Kareem mentions fiber optics, and suddenly they're arguing about whether the internet should be destroyed before it destroys us. The rider rants about cloud storage, feudalism, landlords using the internet to coordinate rent increases, and how subscriptions have turned housing into Netflix. Kareem's verdict: "He cooked. I made a meal with sides. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fuLmWaw5kAY https://www.youtube.com/embed/fuLmWaw5kAY 133 2025-06-30T15:10:39.000Z 1340443 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/album-covers-matter-more-than-the-music-paris 2026-04-15T07:04:01.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/13IW1NhTh40/maxresdefault.jpg Album covers matter more than the music. 📍Paris A rider who makes jungle music argues that album covers matter more than the music itself, insisting that the art gets you into the world of a record and keeps you coming back even when you don't initially like what you hear. Kareem pushes back hard. He disagrees completely, even though he admits to judging books by their covers. The conversation spirals through vinyl shopping habits and the psychology of forced listening before landing on the rider's favorite album cover: Amoroso by João Gilberto. When Kareem jokes about making an album cover out of just a glove, the rider stays diplomatic. The kicker? This whole debate happens while the guy confirms he makes 160 BPM electronic music, which apparently passes Kareem's arbitrary threshold. 150 would've been a problem. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=13IW1NhTh40 https://www.youtube.com/embed/13IW1NhTh40 106 2025-06-29T20:38:42.000Z 362217 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/instead-of-bachelor-and-bachelorette-parties-before-people-get-married-we-should 2026-04-15T07:04:06.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/uN-zXrkniYo/maxresdefault.jpg Instead of bachelor and bachelorette parties before people get married, we should have funerals A straphanger proposes replacing bachelor and bachelorette parties with funerals for your dating life, complete with speeches and all your exes in attendance. Kareem isn't buying it. He points out that's literally what bachelor parties already are, just for your friends instead of your former flames. But this rider has experience gathering romantic prospects en masse: they once invited 15 people from Hinge to a single dinner date, just to save time. It took 45 minutes for everyone to realize how they all knew each other. The rider, who's bisexual, sat at the head of the table with a friend and watched the chaos unfold. Despite this track record of dating chaos, Kareem remains unconvinced that a funeral is the answer. Sometimes efficiency goes too far. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uN-zXrkniYo https://www.youtube.com/embed/uN-zXrkniYo 99 2025-06-29T15:40:44.000Z 637829 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/episode-414-you-should-never-take-personally-a-follow-back-on-instagram 2026-04-15T07:04:13.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/pQlvHi5BDDo/maxresdefault.jpg Episode 414: You should never take personally a follow back on Instagram A straphanger drops a controversial opinion: Instagram follows aren't personal, and she won't follow back friends if she doesn't like their aesthetic. Kareem's stunned by the ruthlessness. She only follows around 200 people and thinks the platform is professional, not social. Why follow someone who hasn't posted since 2020 except holiday pictures? The conversation spirals into pity follows, the horror of people grabbing your phone to follow themselves (an invasion of privacy worth blocking over), and whether Kareem himself will get a follow. He already followed her and didn't take it personally when she didn't reciprocate. They pinky promise her follow back won't be out of pity. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pQlvHi5BDDo https://www.youtube.com/embed/pQlvHi5BDDo 113 2025-06-28T18:45:48.000Z 473130 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/nepo-babies-get-a-bad-rap 2026-04-15T07:04:18.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/tFAavKoeMG8/maxresdefault.jpg Nepo babies get a bad rap Nepo babies get a bad rap, according to a rider Kareem meets in Chicago who's ready to defend Hollywood's most privileged. The conversation kicks off with examples like Steph Curry and Angelina Jolie, then veers into Chet Hanks territory. The rider admits he's neither a nepo baby nor married to one but would "absorb and accept" nepotism if given the chance. He dreams of his kids eating "oysters and seafood towers" instead of mac and cheese with ground beef. Kareem agrees, sort of. He wants his daughter to be a nepo baby too, though not enough to let her take over Subway Takes. The key? Full disclosure. You have to embrace it. Plus, nepo babies pay for dinners and flights, which sounds pretty sick. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tFAavKoeMG8 https://www.youtube.com/embed/tFAavKoeMG8 104 2025-06-28T13:48:31.000Z 626251 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/we-need-to-stop-villainizing-overhead-lighting 2026-04-15T07:04:24.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/R7wc-jqN144/maxresdefault.jpg We need to stop villainizing overhead lighting We need to stop villainizing overhead lighting!" is the battle cry of a straphanger who refuses to apologize for loving the big light. She's had enough of lamp culture. While Kareem pushes back on her fluorescent enthusiasm, she stands firm: overhead lighting keeps you awake, alert, and ready for anything, even if it makes you look worse on camera. The debate spirals into restaurant lighting territory, where she argues you want to see the grime and read the menu clearly. Ethnic restaurants with CNN blaring and harsh lighting? That's where the best food lives. She'll only accept mood lighting in two scenarios: movies and, well, you can guess the second. Her philosophy cuts deep: people who fear the big light are afraid of their own potential. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=R7wc-jqN144 https://www.youtube.com/embed/R7wc-jqN144 123 2025-06-27T15:01:39.000Z 1383712 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/episode-411-pasta-with-garlic-and-oil-is-a-thousand-times-better-than-pasta-with 2026-04-15T07:04:30.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/thzoZzILK3k/maxresdefault.jpg Episode 411: Pasta with garlic and oil is a thousand times better than pasta with tomato sauce A self-described half-Italian, half-Arab rider makes his controversial declaration: pasta with garlic and oil beats red sauce every time. His reasoning? "You have like 14 tomatoes going in your stomach all at one time." He thinks Italians are so angry because of constant acid reflux from too many tomatoes. Kareem pushes back hard, championing classic marinara, but the rider stands firm. After 30 years of his mother's Sunday sauce, he's done. The conversation takes a sharp turn when he reveals he's never had cacio e pepe, shocking Kareem. The rider says his garlic and oil preference got him run out of Staten Island to Jersey. Then he pivots to another gripe: bagel shop owners who put fennel seeds on everything bagels should be shut down immediately. He doesn't know what fennel is and doesn't want to know. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=thzoZzILK3k https://www.youtube.com/embed/thzoZzILK3k 117 2025-06-26T14:33:20.000Z 1479377 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/america-needs-to-cut-10-states 2026-04-15T07:04:47.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/LKNzRMYyhXo/maxresdefault.jpg America Needs To Cut 10 States Comedian Hari Kondabolu has a radical proposal: America needs to cut ten states. He and Kareem rip through the map, combining the Dakotas into one, absorbing Rhode Island back into Massachusetts, and merging Idaho, Montana, and Wyoming because "even if you combine all the people, they're still not enough for a state." Hari wants to sell Alaska to Canada in exchange for British Columbia and a chunk of Ontario with Toronto. Why? "Drake for oil," he explains. Connecticut might become "just one big highway." Hawaii gets to choose independence. The whole scheme is part efficiency argument (too much power in small states with two senators), part aesthetic judgment (Idaho's shape "looks stupid"). A random subway rider wanders over and suggests three senators per state instead of two, instantly winning Hari back over to his own plan. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LKNzRMYyhXo https://www.youtube.com/embed/LKNzRMYyhXo 346 2025-06-26T14:15:01.000Z 353091 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/edison-chen-not-every-hobby-needs-to-be-monetized-feat-edison-chen-and-adidas-originals 2026-04-15T07:04:53.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/wTZP2X3Sngc/maxresdefault.jpg Not every hobby needs to be monetized. Feat Edison Chen and Adidas Originals Edison Chen tends a garden at home with lettuce and Roma tomatoes, and he's determined to keep it that way. No monetization. When Kareem pushes back, suggesting even personal photography ends up licensed in future documentaries, Edison doubles down: he doesn't cook for people he doesn't love, and he refuses to turn joy into labor. The conversation cuts deep. "Do what you love and you'll never work another day in your life" sounds inspirational until you realize you're working 24 hours a day. Both agree the better path is doing something you like for work while keeping what you actually love for yourself. Edison's fashion and music career taught him that hobbies under pressure become stress, so now he guards his passions fiercely. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wTZP2X3Sngc https://www.youtube.com/embed/wTZP2X3Sngc 129 2025-06-25T23:34:35.000Z 1229122 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/bill-burr-when-they-get-rid-of-the-illegals-billionaires-will-start-paying-ppl-a-living-wa 2026-04-15T07:04:59.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/dZZbLemvzvk/maxresdefault.jpg When they get rid of the illegals, billionaires will start paying ppl a living wage. Feat Bill Burr Bill Burr kicks things off with a biting satirical take: when they deport all the illegals, "white billionaires will then magically become generous and start paying people a living wage." He doesn't believe it for a second. The comedian riffs on his pilgrim ancestry and the "Turkey boys" gang before shifting into darker territory about American division. Burr argues that people at the top keep citizens fighting each other, state against state, red tie against blue tie, while rubber bullets fly at protesters just trying to get home. He hates when people say "I will never forgive people that voted for Trump" because it just deepens the split. Kareem agrees about bringing people over instead of pushing them away. The conversation ends with Burr joking about Biden's condition and a tweet that said, "I wish Joe Biden was alive to see this. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dZZbLemvzvk https://www.youtube.com/embed/dZZbLemvzvk 123 2025-06-24T17:39:06.000Z 6776691 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/stop-using-old-photos-on-dating-apps 2026-04-15T07:05:07.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/t4ZVhgC_TiE/maxresdefault.jpg Stop Using Old Photos on Dating Apps Lili Hayes has been alone for 15 years and she's done playing games. She wants dating apps to force users to update their photos every 30 days with a timestamp "receipt" proving the pic is fresh. No more 10-year-old selfies from men who've "already changed 10 times." She's been catfished before and made the guy pay for both the Uber home and the coffee. Now she's hunting for a sugar daddy. Her type? Show me your checking account. That's it. Kareem runs through potential matches, from Leonardo DiCaprio to George Clooney, but Lili's locked in on Denzel Washington and Adrien Brody. She wants rich men to DM her son Kevin Hayes with bank account screenshots. After 15 years of being single since her husband "kicked the bucket," she's ready for yachts and zeros in the account balance, not another liar with outdated photos. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=t4ZVhgC_TiE https://www.youtube.com/embed/t4ZVhgC_TiE 230 2025-06-24T14:15:06.000Z 83715 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/abolish-improv 2026-04-15T07:05:13.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/xSs492a6i9w/maxresdefault.jpg Abolish improv Abolish improv!" a rider declares, though he's busy improvising the entire conversation. Kareem points out the contradiction immediately. The guy insists this talk show doesn't count as improv, but staged improv comedy is ruining indie filmmaking. He's fine with improvisation in spy thrillers or dramas, just not the unfunny stuff people do on stage. When Kareem discovers the rider actually improvised a film himself, the justification gets slippery. "We got lucky. We were lucky." His advice for other filmmakers? Write a script. His own philosophy? "Scripts are for losers." The logic never quite lands, but watching someone argue both sides with total confidence makes for entertaining subway chaos. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xSs492a6i9w https://www.youtube.com/embed/xSs492a6i9w 109 2025-06-23T14:02:11.000Z 1026296 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/episode-407-i-should-be-the-mayor-feat-zohranfornyc 2026-04-15T07:05:19.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/SPp3MxnX02Y/maxresdefault.jpg Episode 407: I should be the mayor. Feat @ZohranforNYC A mayoral candidate confronts attack mailers paid for by Michael Bloomberg, DoorDash, and "Trump-supporting billionaire" Bill Ackman. The rider insists he's not defunding the police but creating a department of community safety to handle mental health and homelessness while cops focus on serious crimes. Kareem keeps circling back to what really matters: $9 matcha lattes. "You could win this campaign easily if you lower the cost of matchas," he jokes, though the candidate admits he can't make that promise. The mailers claim the candidate wants to put homeless people in the subway system and supports radical tax hikes, all lies according to him. His campaign raised $8.3 million from 20,000 people, the same amount Bloomberg dropped on a rival's Super PAC. Early voting's open until Sunday. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SPp3MxnX02Y https://www.youtube.com/embed/SPp3MxnX02Y 155 2025-06-22T13:40:39.000Z 7608592 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/rich-new-yorkers-love-art-but-hate-artists 2026-04-15T07:05:25.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/DvL-POnegGw/maxresdefault.jpg Rich New Yorkers love art — but hate artists A stranger on the subway running for city council district 2 has a sharp observation: rich New Yorkers will drop millions on a Basquiat but won't care when the artist gets evicted from their rent-stabilized apartment. The city's getting too expensive for artists. Even Bushwick is out of reach now. Kareem and the aspiring councilmember get into the weeds on solutions, bouncing around ideas about tax breaks for landlords who rent to artists below market rate and whether wealthy collectors should get write-offs for funding indie films and music careers instead of just flipping paintings like real estate. It's a conversation about patronage, policy, and why New York treats art as an asset class rather than supporting the people who actually make it. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DvL-POnegGw https://www.youtube.com/embed/DvL-POnegGw 124 2025-06-20T23:29:46.000Z 744636 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/ishmael-loutfi-millennials-and-gen-z-are-gonna-be-really-good-old-people-feat-ismael-loutfi 2026-04-15T07:05:31.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/9iyPoUzyz1U/maxresdefault.jpg Millennials and Gen Z are gonna be really good old people. Feat Ismael Loutfi Ismael Loutfi thinks millennials and Gen Z are going to be exceptional old people, but not for heartwarming reasons. His argument? Boomers didn't earn their nostalgia. They dodged the draft, coasted through cheap living, and now reminisce about beating up blind kids. Millennials, on the other hand, will witness the actual collapse of American civilization. By seventy, they'll tell grandkids about Florida before it sank, about trees, about voting between two pedophiles every four years. The punchline gets darker. Those grandkids won't ask why it happened. They'll just say "show," which means what in Mandarin. Kareem asks if Loutfi plans to have kids. Absolutely, he says. The conversation veers into whether Loutfi's thirteen-month-old daughter is learning traditional or simplified Chinese characters. She's learning neither. Just speaking. Kareem points out that makes her illiterate. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9iyPoUzyz1U https://www.youtube.com/embed/9iyPoUzyz1U 122 2025-06-19T19:32:00.000Z 7024428 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/gay-fashion-is-out-of-control 2026-04-15T07:05:48.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/G_dfKxKNEBo/maxresdefault.jpg Gay Fashion Is Out of Control Jordan Firstman, writer and actor, agrees with Kareem's spicy take that gay men dress worse than straight men. The conversation spirals from there. Firstman calls himself "homophobic" for agreeing, then explains he's cosplaying "David Beckham 2003" in a metro-sexual hybrid look. They tear apart the myth that gay men are fashion arbiters, pointing to Queer Eye's dated advice and Stanford Blatch's non-iconic outfits on Sex and the City. The real problem? Risk-taking gone too far. Crop tops that say "I ❤️ Björk," shiny spandex shorts, Doc Martens combos that make straight bars look appealing by comparison. The chat veers into STDs, penicillin shots in the butt, and Firstman's 2025 goal of being more bi because "the gays, it's too much of a commitment." It ends with demands for proof that Kareem isn't homophobic. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=G_dfKxKNEBo https://www.youtube.com/embed/G_dfKxKNEBo 215 2025-06-19T14:15:05.000Z 173878 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/vegan-nuggets-are-a-scam 2026-04-15T07:05:56.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/SoPOaeX-aUY/maxresdefault.jpg Vegan Nuggets Are a Scam Writer and comedian Lea'h Sampson has beef with vegan food lying to her face. She tells Kareem about her ex-vegan trauma, including the $18 cauliflower "wings" that broke her, why she went plant-based for a boyfriend (never again), and how veganism made her so malnourished she was "light-skinned." Stop calling it buffalo cauliflower wings when it's just "a cauliflower that is being a [bleep] in a sauce," she argues. Call it tax fraud instead. Anything but pretending vegetables are meat. The rant spirals into whether DoorDash drivers taint food by delivering it (humans are animals, after all) and the lavender blueberry lemonade a driver straight-up stole from her Panera order. She's done with fraud, schemes, and sauce-tossed vegetables masquerading as chicken nuggets. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SoPOaeX-aUY https://www.youtube.com/embed/SoPOaeX-aUY 279 2025-06-17T14:15:08.000Z 31762 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/i-think-it-should-be-illegal-to-make-fun-of-people-feat-daxflame 2026-04-15T07:06:01.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/XA4FsLmFD7A/maxresdefault.jpg I think it should be illegal to make fun of people. Feat @Daxflame A subway rider believes making fun of people should be straight-up illegal, though when Kareem presses on enforcement, the conversation quickly pivots. The real debate kicks off when the rider proposes that if you eat any meat, you should eat all meat, including dogs and cats. Kareem actually Googles whether cats and dogs taste good mid-interview. They don't. The answer is "tough or stringy," so beef wins out. The rider's eaten guinea pig ravioli, though. Things get lighter when noodles enter the chat as "the funniest food," with fusilli taking top honors because it sounds silly. Turkey gets dissed along the way. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XA4FsLmFD7A https://www.youtube.com/embed/XA4FsLmFD7A 129 2025-06-17T13:05:21.000Z 1901207 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/i-think-all-social-media-platforms-should-be-reserved-for-the-girls-and-the-gays 2026-04-15T07:06:08.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/MNBk_SK7XUs/maxresdefault.jpg I think all social media platforms should be reserved for the girls and the gays only A stranger proposes that all social media platforms should be reserved for the girls and the gays only, with straight men completely banned. Kareem protests. He wants to use Instagram. The conversation spirals into why men ruin everything online: the trolling, the death threats, the creepy DMs telling women "I'm off to you right now." The rider insists she hopes those guys get hit by a truck. Kareem suggests a compromise, maybe real guys hours from midnight to 4:00 a.m., or at least a psych eval before straight men can make an Instagram page. He's not taking a test. He can get a gun without one. The debate touches on cheating, IG baddies, and whether women have ever solicited Kareem the same way. She doesn't believe him when he says yes. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MNBk_SK7XUs https://www.youtube.com/embed/MNBk_SK7XUs 122 2025-06-16T17:36:12.000Z 649007 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/im-sick-of-hotels-guilt-shaming-me 2026-04-15T07:06:13.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/eUQLtVEbcZk/maxresdefault.jpg I'm sick of hotels guilt shaming me A straphanger unleashes fury on hotels that guilt trip guests about towel changes and water conservation. She's not buying the eco-friendly messaging. Her theory? Hotels are using environmentalism as cover to cut costs and fire staff. "I'm on a honeymoon. I don't want to have to think about penguins," she tells Kareem after describing a hotel that asked her to keep showers under 10 minutes. The whole point of hotels is indulgence, she argues, and she's certain luxury properties like Eden Rock aren't asking Kate Moss to reuse towels. The conversation veers into her other hot take: being late is actually a compliment. Kareem disagrees, having just waited through 17 espressos for her to show up. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eUQLtVEbcZk https://www.youtube.com/embed/eUQLtVEbcZk 123 2025-06-15T14:10:27.000Z 1978962 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/get-a-flip-phone 2026-04-15T07:06:18.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/XcaQ4-o3dRc/maxresdefault.jpg Get a flip phone A straphanger champions flip phones as the cure for smartphone-induced depression, though there's a catch: his doesn't actually work. He insists that ditching an iPhone means sending just three words per text, avoiding endless fights, and simply looking around the room instead of watching content. Kareem's skeptical. The rider argues that every cool future in movies is analog, pushing buttons and turning knobs, not digital like Minority Report. "Therapy wasn't an option," he explains about his flip phone switch. But when pressed to demonstrate, he admits he had to get an iPhone for work anyway. The whole pitch unravels beautifully. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XcaQ4-o3dRc https://www.youtube.com/embed/XcaQ4-o3dRc 91 2025-06-14T14:24:59.000Z 928823 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/bring-back-the-guitar-solo 2026-04-15T07:06:24.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/E23WfA9JgEU/maxresdefault.jpg Bring back the guitar solo A straphanger wants to resurrect the guitar solo, and Kareem's all in. The conversation zeroes in on what made guitar solos work: the "sexy OTT" vibe of Prince's "When Doves Cry" and Slash's "November Rain." They agree something went wrong when jam bands got involved. Fish takes the blame. Hard. The rider argues that guitar solos became cheesy instead of cool, losing that over-the-top swagger that made them worth it in the first place. It's like wearing sunglasses indoors, which Kareem may or may not do at dinner depending on the lens opacity and whether he can see the sauce. Neither can actually play the solos they're praising, but that doesn't stop them from wanting the genre back. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=E23WfA9JgEU https://www.youtube.com/embed/E23WfA9JgEU 115 2025-06-13T13:43:32.000Z 519513 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/we-need-to-make-it-harder-to-get-married-than-it-is-to-get-divorced 2026-04-15T07:06:31.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/h_ON1SJQci8/maxresdefault.jpg We need to make it harder to get married than it is to get divorced A recently divorced straphanger has a radical proposal: make marriage harder than divorce. Currently, getting married in Brooklyn costs $15, while divorce runs about $5,500. Her plan? No weddings before 39. Campaign for marriage like you're running for office, complete with signatures from your community. City hall only, no big celebrations. And put $11,000 in escrow before you tie the knot. Kareem pushes back on the economics and age requirements, while his conversation partner insists the point is making people work for love on the front end so they can get out easier on the back end. She's already been married and divorced once, aiming for five total cycles to fill out her Wikipedia page. The counter-proposal: keep marriage simple, make divorce easier, and throw huge parties for the newly single where divorcees get cake and single friends get plus-ones. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=h_ON1SJQci8 https://www.youtube.com/embed/h_ON1SJQci8 125 2025-06-12T16:21:45.000Z 1374537 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/penn-badgley-thinks-theres-no-such-thing-as-nothing 2026-04-15T07:06:38.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/j98BsHCBYb0/maxresdefault.jpg Penn Badgley Thinks There’s No Such Thing as Nothing Penn Badgley drops a cosmic bomb on Kareem: there's no such thing as nothing. Everything is something. The You star and Podcrushed host gets philosophical fast, arguing that even when teenagers say "I don't care," they care precisely because they're saying it. Kareem struggles to keep up as Penn spirals through the Big Bang, the vacuum of space, and whether "nothing" is just a word we use to avoid acknowledging what's actually there. Penn's wildest claim? If there was a nothing so pervasive that nothing could exist within it, that oppressive emptiness would be the equivalent of something. It's confusing. It's profound. Kareem can barely hang on, finally joking that Penn's operating on a plane of vibes few can reach. "This is what you get when you don't go to any school," he quips. Nothing makes sense, which might mean everything does. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=j98BsHCBYb0 https://www.youtube.com/embed/j98BsHCBYb0 210 2025-06-12T14:15:03.000Z 107375 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/it-should-be-socially-acceptable-to-tell-someonewe-can-be-friends-but-only-onlin 2026-04-15T07:06:44.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/lsmTSXII27g/maxresdefault.jpg It should be socially acceptable to tell someone"we can be friends, but only online." Feat James Tom A straphanger pitches a radical idea: "We can be friends, but only online." Kareem's guest argues that some people you vibe with digitally simply don't need to enter your three-dimensional, multi-sensory, flesh world life. The conversation spirals into the politics of sliding into DMs (straight people maybe shouldn't), the varying durations of hookups by sexuality ("30 minutes or less if you're a straight man"), and why our parents' old internet safety advice might've been onto something. The take? You can like someone's posts and politics without ever meeting them IRL. Time is finite. The internet is infinite. Don't slide into James Tom's DMs unless you're offering money. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lsmTSXII27g https://www.youtube.com/embed/lsmTSXII27g 127 2025-06-11T19:31:03.000Z 482123 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/people-are-using-the-find-my-friends-app-wrong 2026-04-15T07:06:49.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/95PGTi67y7o/maxresdefault.jpg People are using the Find My Friends app wrong A straphanger on the subway has a radical proposal: repurpose Find My Friends as "Find My Enemies." Instead of tracking loved ones, use the app to monitor people you want to avoid. Your ex's parents, that coworker from high school, the guy with bad breath. The logic is simple. Let your actual friends roam free and stumble into them organically. But actively dodge the awkward encounters. Kareem loves it. The rider admits he's only tracking four people right now but has ambitions to scale up to "potentially all of New York." The conversation spirals into hypotheticals about changing Sunday park plans if an enemy appears on the radar. At the end, Kareem jokes about adding each other on Find My Friends, just to avoid one another later. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=95PGTi67y7o https://www.youtube.com/embed/95PGTi67y7o 117 2025-06-10T17:32:16.000Z 797561 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/microwaving-is-cooking 2026-04-15T07:06:57.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/5sSGl_2HYBU/maxresdefault.jpg Microwaving Is Cooking World-famous chef José Andrés pulls a can of beans from his pocket on the subway and argues that literally everything is cooking. Opening a can? Cooking. Microwaving? Cooking. Forgetting food in the fridge until it molds? That's cooking too. Kareem pushes back hard, insisting that boiling water isn't cooking and biting an apple is just eating. José counters with increasingly wild logic: letting strawberries ripen is "letting God cook," farming is cooking, and a chef is just a director who tells cooks what to do. The debate gets heated until José cracks open his pocket beans mid-ride and shares them with Kareem, who reluctantly admits he just cooked. They eat beans on the train. José, slightly panicked about breaking subway rules as a former immigrant, gets reassured by Kareem. Somehow gazpacho and the difference between chefs and cooks also come up. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5sSGl_2HYBU https://www.youtube.com/embed/5sSGl_2HYBU 265 2025-06-10T14:00:18.000Z 55389 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/fadily-camara-episode-345-bathroom-and-toilet-should-be-separate-feat-fadily-camara-paris 2026-04-15T07:07:02.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/2lgVnDBYQjA/maxresdefault.jpg Episode 345: Bathroom and toilet should be separate. Feat Fadily Camara 📍Paris Fadily Camara has strong feelings about bathroom design. Her Airbnb in Paris features six toilets, two showers, and three bathrooms, all in separate rooms. Why? She's worried about "poop air" contaminating her toothbrush and bacteria crawling up her leg if it touches the toilet. Kareem agrees with the setup. The conversation veers into cleanliness tells (you can judge people by their phone screens, apparently) and childhood memories of using empty Crystal water bottles as makeshift bidets. Fadily tries out different English accents while asking "what's your take?" She's Muslim, practices proper hygiene, and isn't here for anyone calling her OCD. Just clean. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2lgVnDBYQjA https://www.youtube.com/embed/2lgVnDBYQjA 118 2025-06-09T16:00:40.000Z 898019 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/freestyle-rapping-is-just-as-good-as-talk-therapy 2026-04-15T07:07:09.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/Nzzi5BzUyTs/maxresdefault.jpg Freestyle rapping is just as good as talk therapy A rider on the N train claims freestyle rapping is just as good as talk therapy, then puts his theory to the test with Kareem right there on the subway. What starts as skepticism turns into an impromptu cypher, with bars about Morocco versus Cairo, saving $250 on therapy copays, and Will Smith's Oscar slap. The energy's infectious. Both of them start trading verses, getting progressively looser and more confident, touching on everything from vasectomies to Obama to dog rights in America. By the end, the stranger's completely sold on his own take, feeling like Eminem and ready to hit the pool instead of a therapist's office. Kareem agrees they might've missed their shot at Wild 'N Out, but the vibes speak for themselves. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Nzzi5BzUyTs https://www.youtube.com/embed/Nzzi5BzUyTs 145 2025-06-08T16:19:39.000Z 540933 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/annie-hamilton-the-point-of-everything-is-to-get-laid-feat-annie-hamilton 2026-04-15T07:07:15.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/uYrWnQZx8gY/maxresdefault.jpg The point of everything is to get laid. Feat Annie Hamilton Annie Hamilton walks onto the train with a take that surprises no one: "The point of everything is to get laid." She's wearing a peasant top, which she insists looks nice, though she admits she probably wore it to get laid. She's flown halfway across the world for it, gotten all the hair off her body, then gotten hair back on. Things spiral from there. Hamilton confesses she hasn't been laid in a god long time and has never come with anyone in her life. Her other takes get progressively wilder: 21-year-old girls with the same stamina as 21-year-old boys would make the world "more violent and diabolical," every man having the same size penis would bring world peace, and you shouldn't be in a relationship with the person you have the best sex with. Kareem gets stressed out for the first time ever on the show, his heart actually racing, while Hamilton worries she's demonstrating "how exactly not to get laid. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uYrWnQZx8gY https://www.youtube.com/embed/uYrWnQZx8gY 146 2025-06-07T14:21:05.000Z 6819028 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/talk-to-strangers 2026-04-15T07:07:20.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/wvKMKeRqKe4/maxresdefault.jpg Talk to strangers A writer with a dog named Variety Magazine has a take: talk to strangers. She's had New Yorkers approach her and share intense stories, from casual dog compliments to "Oh, my daughter died" within minutes. She loves it. As a writer, she wants the trauma, calling it better than being on her phone. Kareem's skeptical at first but gets won over by her strategy of complimenting random people, especially working men and old folks with canes, in the "compliment zone" between 72nd and 110th Street on the Upper West and East Sides. They agree New Yorkers should give at least one compliment daily. She's already doing fifty. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wvKMKeRqKe4 https://www.youtube.com/embed/wvKMKeRqKe4 125 2025-06-06T15:22:56.000Z 1727831 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/we-need-more-cat-dads-smallsforcats 2026-04-15T07:07:26.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/aMOnBl2DuGw/maxresdefault.jpg We need MORE cat dads. @SmallsForCats Cat dads are the solution to masculinity, misogyny, and maybe world peace. That's the thesis from a pregnant straphanger who tells Kareem that men who choose cats over dogs have to "work for affection" and learn boundaries, patience, and respect. Cats teach their dads the same lessons women wish more men understood. She's got receipts too: JD Vance and Andrew Tate both hate cats. Her own cat dad journey led to marriage and a baby on the way, proof that feline companionship works. Kareem agrees with the prescription. The rider sums it up: "More cat dads, world peace, we end misogyny, no more crime, better men, better world." No notes. She ate and left no crumbs, just like her kitty cat. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aMOnBl2DuGw https://www.youtube.com/embed/aMOnBl2DuGw 132 2025-06-05T20:02:14.000Z 729876 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/white-people-have-to-stop-calling-out-autism-in-public 2026-04-15T07:07:35.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/oiIeT-7P5v8/maxresdefault.jpg White people have to stop calling out autism in public A rider challenges Kareem on white people's tendency to publicly call out autism, sparking a hilarious cultural comparison about how different communities handle neurodivergence. The conversation shifts fast. They land on how Black and Latin families just let people be: "That's Jose and he likes to sweep." White people, meanwhile, give elaborate warnings before someone shows up. The rider argues that turning autism into casual social commentary has gotten out of hand, especially when people self-diagnose with "a little flare" and make it competitive. Instead of labels, why not just say someone's favorite color is red and that's all they wear? By the end, minds are changed. Kareem can't remember his original stance, but the rider flips from disagreeing to fully agreeing with his own take. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oiIeT-7P5v8 https://www.youtube.com/embed/oiIeT-7P5v8 120 2025-06-04T16:46:38.000Z 6583708 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/just-be-normal 2026-04-15T07:07:42.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/IqjImpDbOuk/maxresdefault.jpg Just be normal Just be normal" sounds simple until a rider tries to explain what that actually means to Kareem, and the conversation spirals into a philosophical tangle about authenticity, mood boards, and Pinterest-inspired personalities. She's frustrated by people who curate their individuality from the same sources, turning themselves into clones wearing Converse and copying aesthetics instead of just being themselves. But Kareem pushes back: isn't the pressure to "be normal" exactly what creates this problem? They argue in circles. She insists people need to look inward and stop overthinking their identity, yet admits she's thought about this so much that Kareem suspects she's now forcing herself to be normal unnaturally. The kicker? When asked who's on her mood board, she says herself. Kareem isn't buying it and takes a wild guess: Natalie Portman. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IqjImpDbOuk https://www.youtube.com/embed/IqjImpDbOuk 121 2025-06-03T17:09:49.000Z 1838500 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/feet-are-not-all-that 2026-04-15T07:07:48.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/oSfBGJRdLec/maxresdefault.jpg Feet are not all that A straphanger opens with a controversial statement: feet are getting entirely too much attention right now. But the conversation takes a sharp turn when he admits he's actually a foot guy himself, dubbing himself "Papa Toe." Kareem pushes him on the contradiction, and the rider comes clean about his fetish, revealing his girlfriend doesn't even know yet. She does now. The two debate whether foot fetishes deserve their stigma, with the rider arguing that foot guys should be more discreet while simultaneously defending the whole thing. When asked who has the nicest feet, he plays it safe with "my beautiful wife" after first saying Margot Robbie. The exchange gets increasingly ridiculous as Kareem jokes about being a closeted foot fetishist while the rider insists context is everything, even as he begs to see Kareem's feet. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oSfBGJRdLec https://www.youtube.com/embed/oSfBGJRdLec 119 2025-06-02T17:18:18.000Z 214391 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/the-movie-theaters-be-doing-too-much-now 2026-04-15T07:07:54.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/67dWvA8Lz4o/maxresdefault.jpg The movie theaters be doing too much now Movie theaters have gone overboard with their premium amenities, and this rider has strong opinions about where to draw the line. He's fine with reclined seats and even Thai chili wings, but all-day brunch service with waiters interrupting the film? That's too much. The problem isn't just the food, it's that you can't even sneak in your own snacks anymore when there's constant table service. He's willing to drop $100 at the theater like it's an amusement park, but he'd rather watch the movie than stare at the menu. Kareem points out that plenty of theaters offer recliners without the full restaurant experience. The rider also vents about his $11 Americano that arrived in a bag, which apparently ruined his whole morning. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=67dWvA8Lz4o https://www.youtube.com/embed/67dWvA8Lz4o 108 2025-06-01T14:14:38.000Z 779586 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/calling-an-arab-a-terrorist-is-a-racist-slur 2026-04-15T07:07:58.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/eH5lzPh6aIw/maxresdefault.jpg Calling an Arab a terrorist is a racist slur An anonymous rider wants "terrorist" classified as a racial slur when it's directed at Arabs. Not just offensive, but an actual slur. He tells Kareem that a Finnish friend recently called him the T-word as a joke, though it didn't bother him that much. The conversation veers into what he calls "the war on hummus," where everyone's fighting over credit for a 10,000-year-old food. He's clear: hummus is Palestinian. Kareem agrees on one thing, at least. Sabra is the worst brand of hummus. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eH5lzPh6aIw https://www.youtube.com/embed/eH5lzPh6aIw 83 2025-05-31T14:57:26.000Z 542115 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/i-hate-hidden-fees 2026-04-15T07:08:05.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/cVke6XLA1q4/maxresdefault.jpg I hate hidden fees Hidden fees are ruining everything, according to a straphanger who's ready to fight over surprise charges. The frustration peaks at dispensaries, where a $12 pre-roll somehow becomes $18 with mysterious ATM fees tacked onto card taps. Bodegas aren't safe either. The rider's got a system though: hold a grudge, never return, and find a competitor across the street. Brooklyn's got plenty of options. Kareem probes the tax versus fee distinction while his conversation partner admits that arguing with bodega guys is basically morning coffee. The take? If it says $10, it better be $10, or there's going to be words. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cVke6XLA1q4 https://www.youtube.com/embed/cVke6XLA1q4 100 2025-05-30T22:47:39.000Z 701701 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/mike-birbiglia-rome-is-guilty-of-the-original-case-of-cultural-appropriation-feat-mike-birbigli 2026-04-15T07:08:09.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/axB79SnrJXk/maxresdefault.jpg Rome is guilty of the original case of cultural appropriation. Feat Mike Birbiglia Mike Birbiglia thinks Rome pulled off the original case of cultural appropriation. The comedian tells Kareem that Italy's obsession with Jesus is bizarre considering the Romans murdered him in Jerusalem. "They were like studio heads," he says, comparing them to Hollywood executives who loved the story but wanted the protagonist to die. Then they sold paintings of themselves murdering him to take over half the world. It's like if the Booth family sold Lincoln Logs. The conversation spirals into cult susceptibility, with Birbiglia admitting he's "cult curious" about the shared meals and carpooling. Leader duty once every three months? That could work. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=axB79SnrJXk https://www.youtube.com/embed/axB79SnrJXk 115 2025-05-29T16:13:40.000Z 1640627 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/if-you-take-a-bottle-of-alcohol-to-a-party-u-take-it-back-youre-a-bad-guest 2026-04-15T07:08:15.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/aqlT8uQOsYg/maxresdefault.jpg If you take a bottle of alcohol to a party & u take it back, you're a bad guest A rider takes a hard stance: if you bring a bottle to a party and take it back, you're a terrible guest. Kareem pushes back, comparing it to bringing a half-eaten cake. The party is over, so why not reclaim what's yours? The rider isn't having it. She argues leftovers belong to the host as a thank you for hosting, unless they insist you take them home. Then comes the racial observation: white people are the ones who pull this move. "I learned BYOB from white people," she says. They agree on one exception. If it's truly BYOB and the host isn't providing anything, taking your bottle is fair game. The conversation ends with a provocative take about body counts and sexual satisfaction before the rider exits at Northland Avenue. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aqlT8uQOsYg https://www.youtube.com/embed/aqlT8uQOsYg 116 2025-05-28T15:25:47.000Z 2358610 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/space-is-none-of-our-business 2026-04-15T07:08:22.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/lzJlMoViges/maxresdefault.jpg Space is none of our business Space is none of our business," one straphanger declares, kicking off a wild debate about whether humanity should fix Earth before chasing aliens. Kareem pushes back hard. The rider insists we're "taking the L as a species" by prioritizing space over solving homelessness and war, comparing the moon landing to an unnecessary trip to Bushwick. Things escalate quickly. The conversation careens from FOMO about space travel to dating as a Muslim ("I'm going to date an alien?") to Nazi billionaires to a campaign platform: Make Earth Great Again. By the end, they've agreed on a ticket for president of Earth, with plans to recruit brilliant aliens and spread Islam through the galaxy. Space Muslims, coming soon. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lzJlMoViges https://www.youtube.com/embed/lzJlMoViges 129 2025-05-27T14:58:24.000Z 915714 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/normalize-not-being-obsessed-with-dogs 2026-04-15T07:08:27.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/9plQxbbnrdw/maxresdefault.jpg Normalize NOT being obsessed with dogs A straphanger wants to normalize not being obsessed with dogs, and Kareem couldn't agree more. The rider explains the awkward ritual of watching friends stop for five minutes to fawn over every dog they pass, feeling forced to pretend she cares too or risk seeming like a serial killer. She's particularly annoyed by Chihuahuas. The conversation spirals into comparing small dogs to rats (both die, but only one requires vet bills) and agreeing that dogs pooping on the streets is disgusting enough to maybe be illegal. When Kareem tries to show off his cat Kremlin, she stays committed to her stance. Pets just aren't her thing. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9plQxbbnrdw https://www.youtube.com/embed/9plQxbbnrdw 99 2025-05-26T13:13:09.000Z 879232 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/its-okay-if-your-parents-have-money 2026-04-15T07:08:33.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/NGVuipX_sbE/maxresdefault.jpg It's okay if your parents have money A straphanger delivers a straightforward take: it's okay if your parents have money. Stop pretending you're broke. Kareem agrees, calling out people who post Thanksgiving photos with elevators and giant kitchen islands while claiming to struggle with rent. The conversation spirals from trust fund kids to "Chicago rich," which the rider defines as blue collar workers with union pensions and a lakehouse in Michigan. Above ground pools come up. Then things get dark. Really dark. Kareem pivots to arguing that retirement is impossible, so everyone should just give up, go to art school, work at Starbucks, and ride it out. AI's going to destroy tech jobs anyway. What are you going to do? The rider blames this nihilistic turn on mentioning his above ground pool. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NGVuipX_sbE https://www.youtube.com/embed/NGVuipX_sbE 100 2025-05-25T13:38:42.000Z 1997925 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/muslims-experience-more-racisin-than-black-people 2026-04-15T07:08:40.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/IcpapJuZhEM/maxresdefault.jpg Muslims experience more racisin than black people A Somali-Norwegian rider tells Kareem about living with what he calls "dual racism," experiencing discrimination as both a Black person and a Muslim. Before 9/11, his Black identity drew more prejudice. After, his Muslim name did. He recounts arriving at JFK from Oslo, where a customs agent treated him warmly until reading "Abdullah Afra" on his passport and immediately sending him to a random check. The conversation shifts to Norway, where he's from "the white people factory" and where locals use a Latin-derived slur that sounds dangerously close to the N-word. In heavily white spaces like Norway, he gives the nod to anyone even slightly dark. How dark? Italian counts. His friend Anthony looks so Pakistani that he'd get the nod too, even though he's 100% Italian. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IcpapJuZhEM https://www.youtube.com/embed/IcpapJuZhEM 121 2025-05-24T16:32:05.000Z 13309581 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/every-country-should-have-one-nuclear-bomb-2 2026-04-15T07:08:46.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/vFoKerGTLQo/maxresdefault.jpg Every country should have one nuclear bomb A straphanger pitches a bold proposition: every country should have exactly one nuclear bomb. Kareem's not buying it. The rider argues that limiting the global arsenal from 12,469 nukes down to just 195 (one per country) would level the playing field and eliminate international bullying. No country could afford to use their single bomb, since everyone would know they're defenseless afterward. Kareem prefers zero bombs, naturally. The conversation zigzags as the rider half-commits to his own take, acknowledging that total disarmament sounds better but won't get the internet talking. He worries he'll get in trouble. The whole thing feels like watching someone workshop a hot take in real time, torn between actual conviction and the desire to say something provocative enough to go viral. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vFoKerGTLQo https://www.youtube.com/embed/vFoKerGTLQo 116 2025-05-22T18:29:44.000Z 2306139 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/cheech-marin-cheech-and-chong-should-be-in-the-rock-and-rollhall-of-fame-feat-cheech-and-chon 2026-04-15T07:08:53.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/Z1BC4-gIjSA/maxresdefault.jpg Cheech and Chong should be in the Rock and RollHall of Fame. Feat Cheech and Chong Cheech Marin and Tommy Chong make their case for Rock and Roll Hall of Fame induction, arguing that "rock and roll is humor" and that famous rockers have learned their songs. The comedy duo reveals a surprising detail that's fooled audiences for over 50 years: while everyone assumes Cheech and Chong are two Mexican guys, Chong is actually Chinese, with the birth certificate name "Chang Bah." Kareem learns that Chong's Chinese name supposedly means "can't hear, can't remember," which the pair demonstrates through their playful bickering about each other's worst flaws. They've got a Grammy already. They threaten to keep making movies unless they get into the Hall of Fame, though Kareem admits he'd rather see more films than have them retire. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Z1BC4-gIjSA https://www.youtube.com/embed/Z1BC4-gIjSA 155 2025-05-21T18:39:38.000Z 335718 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/we-really-dont-need-so-many-emojis 2026-04-15T07:08:59.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/zTXBWADeA0A/maxresdefault.jpg We really don't need so many emojis ‼️😬🙂😈 A stranger on the train thinks we have way too many emojis, citing the absurd fact that there are nearly 4,000 of them when most people only use about 40. Kareem pushes back hard. Emojis haven't replaced words, they've enhanced them, and comparing hieroglyphics to modern communication misses the point entirely. The rider argues that all those moon phases feel like regression, dragging us back 5,000 years. Kareem counters with a bold claim: movies are better than books because pictures beat words. The debate gets messy. Both sides land punches. The rider admits hunting for a specific emoji usually lands him in the flag section, proving his own point about excess. Kareem's verdict? Learn the language, brother. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zTXBWADeA0A https://www.youtube.com/embed/zTXBWADeA0A 96 2025-05-20T16:30:31.000Z 536608 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/stop-cosplaying-vegan-food-as-non-vegan-food 2026-04-15T07:09:05.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/6aO3SMstWyg/maxresdefault.jpg Stop cosplaying vegan food as non vegan food A fired-up straphanger tears into the world of vegan food naming conventions, declaring war on "buffalo cauliflower wings" and other menu imposters. She's sick of the gaslighting. If it's not a wing, don't call it one. It's cauliflower tossed in sauce, period. Kareem watches as she spirals through a rant connecting fake food names to her past vegan lifestyle, which apparently left her "light-skinned" from nutrient deficiency and crying seven days a week. She'd consider dating a vegan again, but only if he makes good money, since vegans apparently fall into two categories: wealthy or "really, really poor 'cause they have too many opinions." Her solution? Restaurants should either be honest or get creative, naming dishes something fun like "tax fraud." The passion is real, the sweat is visible, and the message is clear: stop the vegetable fraud. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6aO3SMstWyg https://www.youtube.com/embed/6aO3SMstWyg 119 2025-05-19T17:34:08.000Z 2271369 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/coffee-shops-and-restaurants-that-dont-serve-half-and-half-should-be-shuttered 2026-04-15T07:09:12.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/Dwls1ax9u9g/maxresdefault.jpg Coffee shops and restaurants that don't serve half and half should be shuttered A straphanger with strong opinions about dairy thinks coffee shops without half and half should be "shuttered," which kicks off one of the weirdest conversations in SubwayTakes history. Kareem pushes back hard, suggesting oat milk or "titty milk" as alternatives. The rider insists he's actually tried breast milk and prefers it to half and half in his coffee. Things spiral. They riff on man milk versus nut milk, debate whether the rider should start "Paul's Half and Half" as a celebrity dairy brand, and land on the conclusion that both of them want their coffee creamers "thicker and richer." The plastic waste from little creamers comes up. So does putting butter in coffee. It's absolutely unhinged, and somehow it all started because this guy thinks half and half tastes better than regular milk. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Dwls1ax9u9g https://www.youtube.com/embed/Dwls1ax9u9g 125 2025-05-18T16:31:56.000Z 440849 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/every-business-has-the-wrong-music-at-the-wrong-volume-joelistcomedy 2026-04-15T07:09:18.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/SAclMG4lza8/maxresdefault.jpg Every business has the wrong music at the wrong volume. ​⁠@JoeListComedy Every business has the wrong music at the wrong volume. That's the adamant take from a straphanger who thinks the French get it right, but American establishments are sonic disasters. He tells Kareem that Starbucks blasts Taylor Swift-style dance music when it should be playing "vocalist jazz. Wes Montgomery. A little D in the coffee shop." The real problem? Corporate spots want you gone fast, hence the uptempo beats designed to make customers "bye bye bye bye bye." He's never confrontational enough to ask staff to change it, preferring to complain in private (this totally counts as private, right?). The conversation spirals into trumpet impressions and a coffee shop concept called "Joe's Joe" where the entire soundtrack is just stand-up bass. Where the hell are we? Good question. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SAclMG4lza8 https://www.youtube.com/embed/SAclMG4lza8 128 2025-05-17T16:30:16.000Z 647530 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/i-think-republicans-should-have-their-own-bathrooms 2026-04-15T07:09:23.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/pvulz_8ua74/maxresdefault.jpg I think Republicans should have their own bathrooms A straphanger offers a solution to America's bathroom wars: Republicans should get their own facilities. She doesn't mind sharing with all genders, but thinks children shouldn't be exposed to Republicans in public restrooms. Kareem enthusiastically agrees. The conversation spirals into bathroom amenities, with the rider proposing lazy boys and free Wi-Fi for liberal bathrooms while Republicans make do with whatever they have. She's confident their facilities would smell worse anyway, given their diet of "ribs and the blood of immigrant children." The satire is pointed and gleeful, flipping conservative talking points about bathroom access into absurdist political comedy that lands its punches quickly. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pvulz_8ua74 https://www.youtube.com/embed/pvulz_8ua74 84 2025-05-16T16:30:30.000Z 641387 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/a-cold-shower-is-better-than-one-that-never-getsfully-hot-ft-method-products-ult 2026-04-15T07:09:29.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/8jEYUECLhxQ/maxresdefault.jpg A cold shower is better than one that never getsfully hot. Ft ​⁠@method-products ​⁠@ultabeauty A cold shower versus one that never gets fully hot sparks an unexpectedly intense debate between Kareem and a subway rider who refuses to compromise on shower temperature. The conversation spirals from lukewarm water into therapy-speak territory, with the stranger insisting Kareem is "setting yourself up to fail" by choosing a shower that'll never deliver warmth. Kareem fires back that he'd rather embrace a freezing fate than chase something impossible. Then it gets personal. Both reveal they're first-generation Americans, but they've landed on opposite sides of the temperature divide. The rider sees cold showers as healing generational trauma, a pivot toward accepting reality. Kareem? He came to America for hot water, dammit, and he's not going back to the cold. It's philosophical. It's absurd. It's about showers. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8jEYUECLhxQ https://www.youtube.com/embed/8jEYUECLhxQ 90 2025-05-15T16:30:05.000Z 320817 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/michael-shannon-thinks-the-midwest-makes-you-better 2026-04-15T07:09:45.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/thHmc9GOYmY/maxresdefault.jpg Michael Shannon Thinks the Midwest Makes You Better Michael Shannon defends the subway. "People are real down on the subway lately," he says, but he still takes it regularly and thinks public transportation beats the absurd number of cars clogging New York. The actor discusses his directorial debut Eric Larue, a film about parents of a school shooter that wrestles with American loneliness and alienation. Directing let him shape every character instead of just one. Kareem pitches him a buddy comedy about opening an "indie Target," but Shannon counters with a buddy drama: two platonic roommates for twenty years, until one gets a girlfriend and moves out. "It's like Marriage Story," Kareem insists. They riff on male friendship breakups, Shannon's love of R.E.M., and whether people recognize him on trains. Mostly, strangers pitch him takes. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=thHmc9GOYmY https://www.youtube.com/embed/thHmc9GOYmY 1827 2025-05-14T18:32:09.000Z 106508 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/the-best-chinese-restaurants-are-the-ones-that-scare-away-white-people 2026-04-15T07:09:50.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/_dWL0MsiO_E/maxresdefault.jpg The best Chinese restaurants are the ones that scare away white people The best Chinese restaurants are the ones that scare away white people" is the opening salvo from a straphanger who quickly finds himself in a spirited debate with Kareem about what actually makes ethnic food authentic. The rider clarifies he wants awful decor, terrible service, and plastic cups. That's the signal. He even scoured Google Maps in LA for Mexican spots with the worst photos, which led him to the best burrito he's ever had. Kareem pushes back but starts to get it: bad ambiance equals good food. The conversation spirals into defining "authentic white food," landing on hot dogs and potatoes. How many potatoes does this guy eat weekly? "How many seashells are in the ocean? https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_dWL0MsiO_E https://www.youtube.com/embed/_dWL0MsiO_E 103 2025-05-14T16:30:22.000Z 782188 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/reporters-should-be-able-to-play-the-sport-they-are-reporting-on-feat-aja-wilson 2026-04-15T07:10:04.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/s1VBcu9PyWg/maxresdefault.jpg Reporters should be able to play the sport they are reporting on. Feat A’ja Wilson and ​⁠@nike A straphanger sparks debate with a hot take: reporters should be able to play the sport they cover. She argues it's "egregious" for someone to report on something they've never played, though she softens her stance slightly by suggesting reporters should have at least played *a* sport to understand the locker room culture. Kareem pushes back with a doctor analogy that doesn't quite land. The conversation veers into WNBA tea ("not drama, but tea"), why there's no reality show about women's basketball yet, and a passionate argument about pizza ratios. She's team crust. Kareem wants extra cheese and sauce. They disagree strongly. The episode wraps with her showing off her A1's, A'ja Wilson's Nike signature shoes, and Kareem jokingly demanding she hand them over since they're both size 13. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=s1VBcu9PyWg https://www.youtube.com/embed/s1VBcu9PyWg 128 2025-05-13T16:30:30.000Z 355800 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/chef-jos-everybody-can-cook-feat-chef-jose-andres-chefjoseandres 2026-04-15T07:10:11.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/CwUQFloPauU/maxresdefault.jpg Everybody can cook. Feat Chef José Andrés @chefjoseandres Chef José Andrés pulls a can of beans and a fork from his pocket to prove his point: everybody can cook. His argument? Opening a can counts. Boiling water counts. Even biting into an apple is cooking, he insists, because "it's anything that allows you to eat." Kareem pushes back hard, but José's logic is relentless. Letting a strawberry ripen? That's God cooking. Forgetting food in the fridge until it molds? Still cooking, just poorly. The debate spirals until José hands Kareem the beans to open on the train. "If you open it, you're cooking," he declares. Kareem cracks it open, takes a bite, and admits defeat. He just cooked. On the subway. Where you're not supposed to eat. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CwUQFloPauU https://www.youtube.com/embed/CwUQFloPauU 134 2025-05-12T17:02:22.000Z 990435 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/people-need-to-get-rid-of-the-aux-cord-and-just-listen-to-the-radio 2026-04-15T07:10:17.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/PBpBntIcuC8/maxresdefault.jpg People need to get rid of the aux cord and just listen to the radio A stranger makes the case for surrendering control and letting the radio take the wheel. Kareem pushes back at first, but the rider insists there's something zen about tuning into whatever's playing in your area, waiting through the bad songs to get to the good ones, absorbing those local ad jingles until you're truly tapped in. It's communal. It's comforting. They bond over "Sensations," a Delaware beach shop that's not even open anymore but lives on through its jingle. The conversation spirals into whether this philosophy applies outside the car (maybe just go with silence or talk to people) and lands on a shower metaphor. You turn the dial and hope it doesn't burn your feet. That's radio. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PBpBntIcuC8 https://www.youtube.com/embed/PBpBntIcuC8 117 2025-05-11T16:30:06.000Z 328888 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/the-men-who-tell-women-that-they-should-smile-more-because-theyre-prettier-are-c 2026-04-15T07:10:29.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/KD2gjeYtJvU/maxresdefault.jpg The men who tell women that they should smile more "because they're prettier are correct A straphanger delivers a brazenly specific take: the men who tell women to smile more are "correct" about the words themselves, even if their sentiment is "toxic and problematic." She separates the statement from its creepy delivery, insisting everyone looks prettier when smiling. The conversation spirals into granular smile philosophy. Training in the mirror before picture day? Essential. Smiling with teeth versus without? It's about whether you've "done the work." Kareem gets schooled on "serving," an aura that apparently requires a straight face. The rider clarifies that you can serve and be happy simultaneously, though when pressed, admits Kareem wouldn't understand. He's an ally to the community, not in it. She's doubling down on everything. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KD2gjeYtJvU https://www.youtube.com/embed/KD2gjeYtJvU 115 2025-05-10T16:30:06.000Z 298920 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/michael-shannon-people-are-real-down-on-the-subway-lately-but-i-still-like-taking-it-feat-michae 2026-04-15T07:10:34.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/A4YwRcoKrKE/maxresdefault.jpg People are real down on the subway lately but I still like taking it. Feat Michael Shannon Michael Shannon thinks the subway's getting a bad rap. While others see danger, he sees people going through something and wonders how they could be helped. That empathy connects to his directorial debut, a film about the parents of a school shooter coping with loneliness and alienation in American society. Then things get weird. Kareem pitches Shannon a buddy drama where they're platonic heterosexual life partners for twenty years until Kareem gets a girlfriend and moves out. Shannon's already upset. The solution? She moves in with both of them. They're inventing a new genre of film drama. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=A4YwRcoKrKE https://www.youtube.com/embed/A4YwRcoKrKE 121 2025-05-09T16:30:04.000Z 507134 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/if-you-get-in-suspended-for-something-you-didnt-do 2026-04-15T07:10:41.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/B-Z4bVT9hPg/maxresdefault.jpg If you get in suspended for something you didn't do… A high schooler pitches a wildly specific revenge fantasy: if a teacher falsely accuses you of something, you should get two minutes in their house to "do whatever you want." Kareem's immediately on board. The conversation spirals through the proposed chaos, from dumping bird seed everywhere to putting a turkey in the dryer to the cruelest move of all: swapping out their Roku stick while logged out. They riff on in-school versus out-school suspension (one's "like Guantanamo Bay, but boring," the other means playing Tony Hawk all day), whether students deserve salaries since they make zero dollars, and the logistics of a kid-friendly Purge. Things get uncomfortably edgy. The improvisational energy veers into references about Chris D'Elia and underground tunnels in Crown Heights before Kareem cuts things off. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=B-Z4bVT9hPg https://www.youtube.com/embed/B-Z4bVT9hPg 156 2025-05-08T16:30:09.000Z 345151 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/tunde-adebimpe-we-should-normalize-comfortable-silences-and-eye-contact-feat-tunde-adebimpe 2026-04-15T07:10:47.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/fywDjxpHmbU/maxresdefault.jpg We should normalize comfortable silences and eye contact. Feat Tunde Adebimpe Tunde Adebimpe from TV On The Radio thinks we should normalize comfortable silences and eye contact with strangers. Kareem's not convinced. The conversation quickly spirals into an awkward experiment where both men try to sit in silence while staring at each other, sunglasses off, attempting to beam love across the subway car. It doesn't last long. Tunde admits he does make brief eye contact when ordering coffee or getting on the train, but extending that second to fifteen seconds requires practice. They try again, this time role-playing a car ride where one passenger won't shut up, then escalating to declarations of love. The whole thing's absurd and uncomfortable, which might be exactly Tunde's point about why we need to get better at this. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fywDjxpHmbU https://www.youtube.com/embed/fywDjxpHmbU 171 2025-05-07T16:30:24.000Z 1692356 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/we-need-better-media-literacy-in-this-country 2026-04-15T07:10:52.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/ep_nsa9g1v0/maxresdefault.jpg We need better media literacy in this country A straphanger calls for better media literacy in America, and Kareem's more than ready to agree. The rider shares a simple rule: if an account has more than two digits in the handle, it's a red flag. Don't trust it. But with everyone screaming "fake news" from all sides, how do people actually figure out what's real? The answer is treating news consumption like grocery shopping. Read the labels. Check credibility and track records, especially with independent journalists covering places like Gaza. The conversation takes an unexpected turn when the rider declares that not using a bidet is a sign of being uncivilized, prompting Kareem to joke that this might be the interview that gets him fired. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ep_nsa9g1v0 https://www.youtube.com/embed/ep_nsa9g1v0 114 2025-05-06T16:30:14.000Z 413002 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/the-first-place-you-wash-in-the-shower-says-everything-abt-u-method-products-ult 2026-04-15T07:10:58.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/9Cy2JlLGtd8/maxresdefault.jpg The first place you wash in the shower says everything abt u! ​⁠​⁠@method-products @ultabeauty A straphanger insists the first place you wash in the shower reveals your personality, and Kareem isn't buying it. The man, a self-proclaimed "chest man," starts there for convenience, then moves to his arms and skips his legs most days. Kareem's a face-first washer who believes in "trickle down soaponomics," the theory that soap naturally cascades down your body like a car wash, making leg-washing unnecessary. He argues bottom-washers are fear-based people only attacking their stinkiest parts, while top-down washers are logical and follow gravity. The debate gets heated over whether starting with your chest means you're vain or just practical, though both men can agree on one thing: this guy has plenty of chest to work with. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9Cy2JlLGtd8 https://www.youtube.com/embed/9Cy2JlLGtd8 105 2025-05-05T16:30:03.000Z 2842799 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/if-someone-wants-to-become-a-dj-they-have-to-earn-a-degree 2026-04-15T07:11:04.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/6CLEibpUZco/maxresdefault.jpg If someone wants to become a DJ, they have to earn a degree A straphanger has a bold proposal: DJs should be required to earn degrees before they can spin records. Not just any degree, but a specialized DJ diploma involving at least three years of study covering music history and research. The reasoning? There are too many bad DJs out there treating it like a side hobby. Kareem discovers his conversation partner is actually a DJ himself, though one without formal training. They workshop the economics together, suggesting DJ school should cost $10,000 a year while other degrees in Europe remain free. Why? To filter out the uncommitted. The kicker: this DJ admits he knows other DJs aren't really doing anything when they perform, and he's ready to open his own DJ university with Kareem as a teacher. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6CLEibpUZco https://www.youtube.com/embed/6CLEibpUZco 107 2025-05-04T16:30:02.000Z 428128 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/if-the-food-from-your-country-of-origin-isnt-delicious-you-shouldnt-be-allowed-i 2026-04-15T07:11:10.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/b3LYl4JwNMM/maxresdefault.jpg If the food from your country of origin isn't delicious, you shouldn't be allowed into NYC If the food from your country of origin isn't delicious, you shouldn't be allowed into New York City." That's the provocative take from a rider who admits he's never actually tried British food but stands by his immigration policy anyway. The conversation spirals from there. Kareem and the stranger, who's Algerian-Egyptian, trade notes on Australia's "brekie" invasion, debate whether white American women invented avocado toast or stole it from the Aussies, and land on the unifying power of chicken over rice with white sauce. The rider's logic? Even the most racist person becomes tolerant after good halal cart food. He picks Algerian cuisine over Egyptian, citing his deadbeat Egyptian dad as the tiebreaker. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=b3LYl4JwNMM https://www.youtube.com/embed/b3LYl4JwNMM 117 2025-05-02T16:30:22.000Z 1919305 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/billionaires-shouldnt-exist 2026-04-15T07:11:16.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/eEtzfDp4m6w/maxresdefault.jpg Billionaires shouldn't exist A rider with strong opinions on wealth inequality tells Kareem that billionaires shouldn't exist and need to be "shamed from society and alienated from society." She's not playing around. The conversation hits hard on how a handful of people control the world's wealth while others can't afford insulin, and she argues that Americans are more likely to become homeless than to ever see a million dollars. When Kareem asks if she'd eat the rich, she turns it around: would he eat Rihanna? He hedges, saying she's "a special case." The rider reveals she's already run for office and lost, prompting Kareem's advice: "Next time you should win. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eEtzfDp4m6w https://www.youtube.com/embed/eEtzfDp4m6w 87 2025-05-01T16:30:29.000Z 381673 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/the-best-things-are-cash-only 2026-04-15T07:11:21.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/fB5Ex2iDPT8/maxresdefault.jpg The best things are cash only Cash rules everything. A rider and Kareem bond over the superiority of cash-only establishments, from Kingston Tropical Bakery's beef patties on White Plains Road to "the best massages" at reflexology spots that tack on $8 for card payments. The conversation spirals from Ramirez Carnitas to strip clubs. "Any restaurant that doesn't accept cash is classist," the rider argues, because they assume you have a bank account and good credit. He keeps his money under the mattress like Jay-Z, hasn't touched an ATM in 20 years, and quotes Wu-Tang with reverence. The exchange ends with a Heat reference and an ominous flex about staying strapped with a backpack, ready to move in 30 seconds when the heat is on. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fB5Ex2iDPT8 https://www.youtube.com/embed/fB5Ex2iDPT8 116 2025-04-30T13:48:27.000Z 554925 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/episode-355-as-a-midwesterner-i-think-ranch-can-kind-of-go-with-everything 2026-04-15T07:11:26.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/fVL6hbcY3kI/maxresdefault.jpg Episode 355: As a midwesterner, I think ranch can kind of go with everything A Midwesterner makes the bold declaration that "ranch can kind of go with everything," and Kareem couldn't agree more. The conversation quickly turns to Chicago pizza, where this straphanger drops a controversial truth bomb: deep dish is a sham, and thin crust tavern-style is the real Chicago pizza. Ranch belongs on that. They bond over ranch seasoning powder, with the rider suggesting restaurants should put Hidden Valley dehydrated ranch into shakers so customers can dust their pizza at will. The energy is pure Midwest. Kareem's on board. There's even applause from other riders who get it. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fVL6hbcY3kI https://www.youtube.com/embed/fVL6hbcY3kI 81 2025-04-29T20:43:48.000Z 317624 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/if-youre-tall-and-you-cant-dunk-were-the-same-height 2026-04-15T07:11:31.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/1Kkw5ftNNXU/maxresdefault.jpg If you're tall and you can't dunk we're the same height A tall stranger presents a controversial theory: if you're tall and can't dunk, you're the same height as short people. His logic? Since the invention of the ladder, the only real reason to be tall is dunking in an NBA game. Kareem pushes back hard, defending his 5'12" stature and suggesting the guy take up rapping or limbo instead. The rider insists dunking is "one of the most beautiful things" and a necessary condition for tallness, even admitting it's physically impossible for him personally. The conversation spirals into absurdist territory when he claims he's actually a 12-year-old boy and it's illegal to film him without parental consent. Kareem tries motivating him with movie logic about little guys achieving the impossible, but the stranger remains unconvinced about his dunking prospects. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1Kkw5ftNNXU https://www.youtube.com/embed/1Kkw5ftNNXU 117 2025-04-29T16:30:01.000Z 399112 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/alexia-cambon-id-rather-talk-to-ai-than-go-to-another-meeting-ft-alexia-cambon 2026-04-15T07:11:38.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/tOmC3Lb08DM/maxresdefault.jpg I’d rather talk to AI than go to another meeting. Ft Alexia Cambon Alexia Cambon would rather talk to AI than attend another meeting, and Kareem gets it. She's stuck in about 10 meetings a day on average, which sounds like corporate hell. The conversation spirals from meeting overload to Kareem's AI assistant named Kareem.ai that takes notes in video calls, then to his wife allegedly trying to cheat on him with an AI. Alexia works with Microsoft and believes AI can help you skip meetings entirely by catching you up afterward, which tracks when you're getting interrupted every two minutes by notifications. Kareem admits he just wants a servant, not some judgment-passing robot trying to improve him. The irony? This subway chat is technically a meeting too, but at least you're going somewhere. Literally. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tOmC3Lb08DM https://www.youtube.com/embed/tOmC3Lb08DM 121 2025-04-28T13:22:26.000Z 170449 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/michelle-buteau-why-does-health-insurance-have-to-be-a-luxury-in-america-feat-michelle-buteau 2026-04-15T07:11:44.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/89H7eTFJb_k/maxresdefault.jpg Why does health insurance have to be a luxury in America? Feat Michelle Buteau Michelle Buteau tells Kareem why health insurance shouldn't be a luxury in America, pointing out the absurdity that "it's easier to get insurance for your dog than it is to get insurance for your child." She contrasts her experience growing up without coverage to her Dutch husband's confidence. He skis down unfamiliar mountains without fear because he's had health insurance his whole life. Kareem shares his own horror story: in college, he taped a popsicle stick to his injured finger because he couldn't afford treatment, only to learn later he needed surgery for a torn ligament. The conversation spirals into why vision insurance is cheapest when "you can't get a replacement eye" but you can replace hips and noses. Buteau wishes she could stick to petty takes instead, like why famous people are doing standup for the check. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=89H7eTFJb_k https://www.youtube.com/embed/89H7eTFJb_k 163 2025-04-27T16:30:02.000Z 418189 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/youre-not-living-your-best-life-until-youre-boarding-group-1-on-an-airplane-chim 2026-04-15T07:11:50.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/qOMS8HTvUEI/maxresdefault.jpg You're not living your best life until you're boarding GROUP 1 on an airplane. @Chime A rider declares that boarding group one on an airplane matters more than buying a house. He's dead serious. His adult checklist had three things: find a wife, get zone one, buy a house. He's done two of them, and the house isn't one. Kareem learns that achieving zone one requires commitment to a single airline, which this Gemini finds impossible when he's bouncing between Spirit and Delta based on price. The conversation spirals into increasingly absurd territory as they debate whether zone zero means sitting in the cockpit and whether boarding groups are less about points and more about "getting in the zone zone." The rider admits he's punted toddlers in the back of the plane. Zone three means you're just getting started, zone two means you're almost there, and zone one means you've made it. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qOMS8HTvUEI https://www.youtube.com/embed/qOMS8HTvUEI 108 2025-04-26T13:21:44.000Z 237841 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/bring-back-the-dollar-slice-seamless 2026-04-15T07:12:04.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/6faWlvczeFk/maxresdefault.jpg Bring back the dollar slice. @seamless Bring back the dollar slice!" A straphanger shares the rallying cry for New York's endangered cheap pizza. The rider gets nostalgic, remembering how dollar slices sustained them through their first four years in the city and recalling the shock of finding pizza for a buck while smoothies cost $16. Kareem agrees it's criminal that the dollar slice disappeared without ceremony. No parade, no farewell. They debate toppings (straight cheese versus free red pepper and parmesan) and whether the dollar slice deserves its own category separate from New York or Chicago pies. The conversation shifts to other items that should cost a dollar, landing on bodega coffee, though they can't agree on current prices. The guest insists black coffee still goes for a buck somewhere. Kareem needs proof. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6faWlvczeFk https://www.youtube.com/embed/6faWlvczeFk 125 2025-04-25T18:28:21.000Z 325402 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/elevators-are-one-of-the-weirdest-intimate-experience-strangers-have-on-a-daily 2026-04-15T07:12:08.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/nCL6uWVBlOQ/maxresdefault.jpg Elevators are one of the weirdest intimate experience strangers have on a daily basis Elevators are one of the weirdest intimate experiences strangers have on a daily basis, and this rider has thoughts. Kareem meets someone who's clearly spent too much time thinking about the awkwardness of being trapped in a tiny room, propelled up into the sky with strangers, all facing the same direction in what they describe as "a really emotionally repressed orgy." It gets meta. Sometimes they start laughing in elevators just thinking about how everyone else is also thinking about being in the elevator, which makes it worse. The proposed solution? Put seats in elevators like the subway, because standing together is always awkward. Or take the escalator. Twenty-five floors though? No. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nCL6uWVBlOQ https://www.youtube.com/embed/nCL6uWVBlOQ 94 2025-04-24T14:52:38.000Z 165415 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/we-need-to-stop-asking-kids-what-they-want-to-be-when-they-grow-up 2026-04-15T07:12:14.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/YTEU7Yhtmbk/maxresdefault.jpg We need to stop asking kids what they want to be when they grow up A straphanger argues we should stop asking kids what they want to be when they grow up, sparking a conversation with Kareem about the rapidly changing workforce and whether career-focused questions put too much pressure on children. The rider points out that most jobs today might not even exist in the future. "Explain your job to somebody in the medieval times," Kareem says. "They would look at you with slow blinks." The conversation shifts to what we should ask instead. How do you want to make the world a better place? What are you curious about? The rider suggests focusing on imagination and leisure rather than the 9 to 5 grind, proposing we ask kids what they want to do for fun when they grow up. Sports would still exist, they joke. Kareem agrees that asking who they want to be, not what, might be the better question. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YTEU7Yhtmbk https://www.youtube.com/embed/YTEU7Yhtmbk 120 2025-04-23T20:26:14.000Z 570658 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/ramy-youssef-fundamentally-everyone-is-a-good-person-feat-ramy-youssef 2026-04-15T07:12:20.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/DCyVrQMeu2g/maxresdefault.jpg Fundamentally everyone is a good person. Feat Ramy Youssef Ramy Youssef argues that fundamentally, everyone is a good person. They're just infected. Infected with greed, hatred, lust, whatever takes them away from being good. He tells Kareem that bad people only pull off terrible things because they still contain enough good for others to trust them. Take George Bush and his paintings. People see the art and think he's a good guy, then he pitches another idea before the side hustle. Youssef developed this theory during COVID when he realized you love someone but can't be near them because they have the virus, not because they are the virus. Bush? Infected with capitalism and the military-industrial complex. Elon Musk? That's different. He's an alien. Youssef's convinced because Musk is obsessed with going to space. He just wants to go home to Mars, like E.T. wanting to return to his family. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DCyVrQMeu2g https://www.youtube.com/embed/DCyVrQMeu2g 119 2025-04-22T16:45:51.000Z 1085991 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/ramy-youssef-says-all-people-are-good 2026-04-15T07:12:29.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/xUqBj4kaHTE/maxresdefault.jpg Ramy Youssef Says All People Are Good Ramy Youssef kicks off with a bold take: "Fundamentally, everyone is a good person." Even George Bush and Netanyahu. Really? Kareem pushes back, and Ramy doubles down with his theory that people aren't bad, they're just "infected" with greed, hatred, or capitalism like it's COVID. He argues Netanyahu is "the most infected person on Earth" and that Elon Musk is literally an alien trying to get back to Mars. The conversation veers wildly from there. They hit up IBN Hamido in Astoria, Queens and discuss the transcendent feeling of finally peeing after holding it too long (better than sex, apparently), Ramy's recent probiotic yogurt disaster that led to him pooping his pants a month ago, his new show 1 Happy Family USA on Prime Video, and why he'd be totally fine with the ad-supported tier of heaven. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xUqBj4kaHTE https://www.youtube.com/embed/xUqBj4kaHTE 1934 2025-04-22T16:33:19.000Z 122739 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/penn-badgley-there-is-no-such-thing-as-nothing-feat-penn-badgley 2026-04-15T07:12:33.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/GT1ONC9j4NY/maxresdefault.jpg There is no such thing as nothing. Feat Penn Badgley Penn Badgley has a bold take: there is no such thing as nothing. Everything is something. When Kareem pushes back with the example of closing your eyes and seeing black, the You star calls that "a profound something" and argues that we use the word "nothing" in ways that dismiss the incredible existence of everything around us. The conversation spirals into Big Bang territory. Badgley theorizes that if nothing was so pervasive before the Big Bang that nothing could exist within it, that's actually "the equivalent of 100% something." Kareem struggles to keep up with the philosophical plane Badgley's operating on. "This is what you get when you don't go to any school," Kareem jokes. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GT1ONC9j4NY https://www.youtube.com/embed/GT1ONC9j4NY 142 2025-04-21T16:30:05.000Z 477412 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/anything-is-a-dating-app 2026-04-15T07:12:39.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/JaaT85plB50/maxresdefault.jpg Anything is a dating app Anyone that has their Venmo public is a hoe," a straphanger tells Kareem, launching into a spirited debate about whether every platform with a messaging feature counts as a dating app. The rider rattles off possibilities: Spotify, Reddit threads, even the New York Times crossword. She's confident earth itself is a dating app. But when Kareem pushes whether she's actually hooked up with someone from LinkedIn or Venmo, the thesis crumbles fast. LinkedIn is for work, not romance. Instagram comments, sure. Email? Absolutely not. The conversation ping-pongs between "you can find love anywhere" idealism and the reality that sliding into DMs on professional networking sites is deeply unhinged. Kareem suggests Partyful invites could be romantic. She's not buying it. They do agree on one thing: Subway Takes is definitely a dating app. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JaaT85plB50 https://www.youtube.com/embed/JaaT85plB50 112 2025-04-20T16:30:03.000Z 360333 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/the-best-way-to-get-a-woman-be-gay 2026-04-15T07:12:45.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/KLicfedBACw/maxresdefault.jpg The Best way to get a woman: be gay A rider shares his unconventional relationship advice: be gay. His logic? He was in a "gay marriage" with a gay man, had an affair with a woman, and now they're married. The twist keeps coming. He claims he's pioneered "closeted heterosexuality" and jokes that bisexuality doesn't exist. Kareem tries to follow the math. The rider admits it was a loveless marriage but stayed because "we were making so much money being gay together." He's unbothered by the cheating because he didn't love his husband anymore. The whole conversation spirals into territory designed to offend everyone equally, with the rider insisting gays are just better at everything. By the end, Kareem's pretty sure they're both getting cancelled. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KLicfedBACw https://www.youtube.com/embed/KLicfedBACw 103 2025-04-19T17:24:40.000Z 266538 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/end-morning-supremacy 2026-04-15T07:12:53.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/zI9hpXd17p8/maxresdefault.jpg End morning supremacy A night owl takes aim at society's obsession with early risers, arguing that "morning supremacy is capitalist culture." She wakes up between 10 a.m. and noon now, but used to wake at 2 p.m. and was her most creative then. The conversation spirals into sleep science (studies were conducted only on men, she claims, while women need 9 to 11 hours), workplace flexibility (her coworker negotiated an 11 to 7 schedule), and the capitalist conspiracy behind "the early bird gets the worm." Kareem agrees morning supremacy is misogynist. Let girls sleep. The real wisdom? Both birds can get the worm if we stop limiting resources and forcing everyone into the same schedule. She makes her case: the late afternoon chiller actually wins. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zI9hpXd17p8 https://www.youtube.com/embed/zI9hpXd17p8 137 2025-04-18T16:30:30.000Z 697583 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/you-got-money-when-you-can-order-market-price-at-a-restaurant-and-not-care-about 2026-04-15T04:57:36.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/dZqAYQEzNJ4/maxresdefault.jpg You got money when you can order market price at a restaurant and not care about what it is The host chats with a stranger about what it really means to have money. Their hot take? You've truly made it when you can order market price at a restaurant without even asking what it costs. That's the ultimate flex. The conversation gets into how most people nervously avoid those dishes entirely, but true wealth means total freedom from price anxiety at dinner. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dZqAYQEzNJ4 https://www.youtube.com/embed/dZqAYQEzNJ4 112 2025-04-17T21:12:35.000Z 1271541 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/i-think-the-most-attractive-thing-someone-can-be-is-offline-chime 2026-04-15T04:57:40.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/OapdQpANl2M/maxresdefault.jpg I think the MOST attractive thing someone can be is offline. @Chime The host chats with someone who thinks being offline is the hottest quality a person can have. They discuss how constantly being on your phone or social media is a major turnoff, while someone who can disconnect and be present is incredibly attractive. It's a refreshing take in our hyperconnected world. The conversation touches on dating, authenticity, and why putting down your phone might be the best move you can make. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OapdQpANl2M https://www.youtube.com/embed/OapdQpANl2M 115 2025-04-16T16:30:09.000Z 435826 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/the-walkman-and-hamilton-leigh-hauser-motorcycles-should-have-mufflers 2026-04-15T04:57:43.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/_PKR5lM_-TU/maxresdefault.jpg Motorcycles should have mufflers A guest argues that motorcycles should be required to have mufflers because they're way too loud in the city. The noise complaint gets real when they talk about how obnoxious revving bikes are at all hours. Hamilton Leighthauser and The Walkman are tagged, suggesting they're connected to either the interview or the take itself. It's a classic NYC quality of life gripe. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_PKR5lM_-TU https://www.youtube.com/embed/_PKR5lM_-TU 103 2025-04-15T16:30:12.000Z 170387 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/good-memory-is-overrated 2026-04-15T04:57:47.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/0upFapxUsgA/maxresdefault.jpg Good memory is overrated The host meets a passenger who argues that having a good memory is actually overrated in modern life. They make the case that constantly remembering everything can be a burden, and that forgetting things is underrated. It's a refreshing counterpoint to productivity culture. The guest thinks we'd all be happier if we let go of trying to retain every detail and just lived more in the moment instead. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0upFapxUsgA https://www.youtube.com/embed/0upFapxUsgA 80 2025-04-14T18:22:35.000Z 454382 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/gay-men-dress-worse-than-straight-men 2026-04-15T07:13:00.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/LkUnHBu4RNs/maxresdefault.jpg Gay men dress worse than straight men A gay man in a self-described "David Beckham 2003" look declares that gay men dress worse than straight men, sparking a heated but playful debate with Kareem about fashion risk-taking and sexuality. The rider argues he's "cosplaying" as a straight man and calls out his sleeve as "gay as a bum," the gayest thing about his outfit. They riff on how '90s media sold everyone on gay men as fashion authorities. Then reality hit. The conversation spirals into comparisons of gay versus straight bars, where ill-fitting jeans and flannels beat crop tops reading "I love York and bottoming" paired with shiny spandex shorts. It's chaotic. The episode ends with jokes about proving allyship through makeouts and girth preferences, complete with a quick kiss attempt. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LkUnHBu4RNs https://www.youtube.com/embed/LkUnHBu4RNs 125 2025-04-13T16:30:06.000Z 721807 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/theres-2-types-of-ppl-in-this-those-with-cases-and-those-without-chime 2026-04-15T07:13:06.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/6wXoOh6I93Q/maxresdefault.jpg There's 2 types of ppl in this 🌎, those with cases and those without. @Chime A rider declares there are two types of people in this world: those with phone cases and those who go caseless. Kareem agrees enthusiastically. Going caseless signals an abundance mindset, a confidence that you can just replace the phone if it breaks. The rider admits he shatters his phone three or four times a year but doesn't care since insurance covers replacement screens for just $25. They introduce the concept of "shatter boys," guys who permanently have cracked screens but don't bother fixing them because they're not really grinding on their phones anyway. Think skateboarder whose dad works at Lockheed Martin. Kareem has a case. The rider calls it aesthetically unpleasing and convinces him to take it off, only to discover Kareem's phone is green underneath. Put it back on, bro. They agree Kareem needs to upgrade to a normal guy's color first, then ditch the case. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6wXoOh6I93Q https://www.youtube.com/embed/6wXoOh6I93Q 111 2025-04-12T16:30:04.000Z 402921 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/men-are-by-farthe-more-emotional-and-hysterical-gender 2026-04-15T07:13:11.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/e8XXKd9X5RU/maxresdefault.jpg Men are by farthe more emotional and hysterical gender Men are by far the more emotional and hysterical gender, a male rider tells Kareem, and both men quickly agree. The conversation turns into a surprisingly earnest discussion about male emotional processing, with the rider arguing that men handle emotions "much more poorly" than women. While women express and move through feelings, men punch walls and can't feel sadness without it morphing into anger. He advocates for therapy and talking to other men about feelings. Kareem suggests maybe having a sleepover with your boys. The rider's response takes an unexpected turn involving quiet time after you "watch the movie and jerk off together," which is apparently why he's not crazy about houseguests. They're eventually kicked off the train, giving them a chance to practice what they preach about frustration versus sadness. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=e8XXKd9X5RU https://www.youtube.com/embed/e8XXKd9X5RU 119 2025-04-11T16:30:26.000Z 1065757 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/you-shouldnt-sleep-in-sexy-clothes-paris 2026-04-15T07:13:17.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/Vug6BZ9-R0c/maxresdefault.jpg You shouldn't sleep in sexy clothes. (📍PARIS) A Parisian rider reveals her elaborate nighttime routine that starts with a firm rule: no sexy sleepwear allowed. She's got to look good all day, so comfort wins at night. Her setup is intense. There's a fox eye mask, a weighted mask to keep her boyfriend from waking her (he doesn't have the muscles to lift it), noise-canceling headphones, and a specific order for everything: teeth, mask, spot cream if needed, then headphones. The rest? Completely naked. Kareem tries on her gear and admits he actually feels sexy wearing it all. Her boyfriend got the full disclosure early: "I want kids, I'm 35 and I sleep with eye mask." He was apparently desperate enough to accept the whole package. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Vug6BZ9-R0c https://www.youtube.com/embed/Vug6BZ9-R0c 86 2025-04-10T16:30:16.000Z 129335 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/therapists-should-not-be-hot 2026-04-15T07:13:22.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/Q_9IWgCAAbo/maxresdefault.jpg Therapists should not be hot Therapists should be ugly. That's the blunt take from a rider who's had one too many attractive therapists, and he's got receipts. He admits to doing push-ups in the lobby before sessions, lying about his life, and even telling other people's stories to impress his hot therapist. Can't be vulnerable when you're trying to look good. Kareem suggests therapy never works because you inevitably fall in love with your therapist, but the conversation takes a wild turn when the rider reveals his elderly therapist had him set up her Roku during a session. He watched her dogs. She still has his Hulu password. As Kareem puts it, "That's your ex-girlfriend. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Q_9IWgCAAbo https://www.youtube.com/embed/Q_9IWgCAAbo 115 2025-04-09T16:30:05.000Z 1863041 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/people-that-are-on-work-zoom-calls-at-coffee-shops-killing-the-vibe-rufat-agayev 2026-04-15T07:13:27.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/Z33gJUMN-Lc/maxresdefault.jpg People that are on work Zoom calls at coffee shops: killing the vibe. ​⁠@rufat_agayev People with dual monitors and headsets at coffee shops need to stop. A straphanger delivers this scorching take to Kareem, arguing that coffee shops exist for artisans, cobblers, and creatives doing legitimate work like updating their Squarespace or doom scrolling. Not Zoom calls. The conversation escalates when they land on a perfect solution: if someone's taking a work meeting in public, everyone nearby should just join in. "I'm the CEO now. I'm the captain. Chief Eio." It's vigilante justice for the overly caffeinated, and honestly, the logic checks out. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Z33gJUMN-Lc https://www.youtube.com/embed/Z33gJUMN-Lc 100 2025-04-08T16:30:09.000Z 852603 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/steve-coogan-episode-331-jesus-was-not-a-republican-feat-steve-coogan 2026-04-15T07:13:38.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/RidlX5RUurU/maxresdefault.jpg Episode 331: Jesus was not a Republican. Feat Steve Coogan Steve Coogan has strong opinions about Jesus and American politics. The actor argues that right-wing Republicans have co-opted Christianity, insisting Jesus was actually a socialist who "threw the money lenders out of the temple." He wasn't a capitalist. Coogan and Kareem riff on whether Jesus would've changed his stance on homosexuality if he'd lived longer, imagining him around age 44 saying "I've been talking to some of them and they seem okay." The conversation turns absurd and hilarious as they picture Jesus hosting a progressive podcast, becoming "the Joe Rogan of the left." Coogan reveals he had the Bible "rammed down my throat as a kid," quickly clarifying he means the book itself. The whole exchange manages to be both irreverent and genuinely thoughtful about how modern American Christianity has strayed from its roots. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RidlX5RUurU https://www.youtube.com/embed/RidlX5RUurU 128 2025-04-07T19:56:04.000Z 741109 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/if-somebodys-not-willing-to-travel-to-your-borough-theyre-just-not-that-into-you 2026-04-15T07:13:45.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/oDQTM9wiw8o/maxresdefault.jpg If somebody's not willing to travel to your borough, they're just not that into you! @bumble If somebody's not willing to take a train, cab, bus to your borough, they're just not that into you." That's the opening salvo from a Manhattan rider who's got strong opinions about dating geography. She won't date anyone requiring a train transfer. Too much. Kareem, happily married and living with his wife in the same home, pushes back on her radius restrictions. She insists she's willing to travel for love, mentioning the Bronx, Brooklyn, and Queens as acceptable destinations, but draws a hard line at Staten Island. Her best date ever? Coney Island, complete with the Cyclone, beach time, and airbrush tattoos. The contradiction is glaring: she claims she'd go the distance but also smashes that one-mile radius button on Bumble. Still, her final verdict stands: travel for love. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oDQTM9wiw8o https://www.youtube.com/embed/oDQTM9wiw8o 88 2025-04-06T16:30:20.000Z 399282 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/imitation-is-absolutely-not-the-highest-form-of-flattery 2026-04-15T07:13:51.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/bnGMxuRzxg0/maxresdefault.jpg Imitation is absolutely NOT the highest form of flattery Imitation is absolutely not the highest form of flattery," a rider declares, kicking off a spirited rant about copycats and content thieves. She and Kareem swap stories about the excuses people make when caught ripping off ideas: "Oh yeah, it's totally possible that two people came up with the same idea at the same time, different parts of the world." They mock the classic deflections. "You didn't invent interviewing people," copycats tell Kareem, but he fires back that he did invent interviewing people on the train saying "What's your take?" while holding a metro card. The rider has her own mantra for the imitators. "They want to be me so bad." Both agree the move is simple: if you realize you've copied someone, "cease and desist right away." You cease yourself, then you desist. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bnGMxuRzxg0 https://www.youtube.com/embed/bnGMxuRzxg0 132 2025-04-05T16:41:23.000Z 227314 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/becoming-hot-has-become-too-accessiblechicago 2026-04-15T04:58:25.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/A3wPwj5fLeM/maxresdefault.jpg Becoming hot has become too accessible.(📍Chicago) The host chats with someone in Chicago who argues that plastic surgery and cosmetic procedures have made being attractive way too easy nowadays. They discuss how beauty standards have shifted now that anyone can get work done. The conversation touches on accessibility of procedures and whether that's changed the whole game when it comes to looks. It's a spicy take on modern beauty culture. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=A3wPwj5fLeM https://www.youtube.com/embed/A3wPwj5fLeM 110 2025-04-04T17:30:02.000Z 226657 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/you-have-to-decide-now-whos-gonna-get-the-aux-on-the-way-back-home-from-a-funera 2026-04-15T07:13:57.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/flYKNtqENEs/maxresdefault.jpg You have to decide now who's gonna get the aux on the way back home from a funeral!Mustafa The Poet A straphanger drops a devastating hypothetical: you have to decide right now who gets the aux cord on the way back from a funeral. He's learned this lesson the hard way. His boy played "Codeine Crazy" on loop after their friend died, and now that Future track soundtracks every memory of his lost homie. The conversation turns philosophical fast. There are two kinds of post-funeral songs, he explains: ones that help you escape the grief and ones that make you face it head-on. He's team face-it, advocating for Lauryn Hill because "it's God conscious" and makes you contemplate faith and your own return. Kareem suggests Chlöe's "Pray It Away." The rider reveals he's actually making funeral music for the hood. His advice? Text the group chat now, pick your playlist curator before emotions run too high, because that drive home will define how you remember them forever. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=flYKNtqENEs https://www.youtube.com/embed/flYKNtqENEs 101 2025-04-03T17:30:06.000Z 426998 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/partying-is-more-restful-than-rest-itself 2026-04-15T07:14:03.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/rr03_DidY1k/maxresdefault.jpg Partying is more restful than rest itself A straphanger in Paris offers a counterintuitive hot take: partying is more restful than rest itself. His logic? Going to bed early every night becomes mentally exhausting, while being around people with music and dancing provides fulfillment that meditation can't match. He argues that working out is bad for you because it's so tiring, whereas partying lets you chill and actually resets your relationship with routine. Kareem pushes back at first but starts to see the wisdom when the rider explains that a good bender leaves you so wiped that you're motivated to "be a good man" afterward. It's a break from your everyday self. By the end, Kareem's convinced. He's pro-party. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rr03_DidY1k https://www.youtube.com/embed/rr03_DidY1k 113 2025-04-02T17:30:14.000Z 141366 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/every-american-should-have-to-live-for-at-least-two-weeks-a-year-in-the-south 2026-04-15T07:14:10.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/y3dM0bAIIkI/maxresdefault.jpg Every American should have to live for at least two weeks a year in the South A subway rider challenges New Yorkers to spend two mandatory weeks each year in the real South, not Atlanta or Miami, but places like Shreveport, Mobile, and Tallahassee. Kareem pushes back hard. What's he supposed to do in Alabama? The rider insists that's exactly the problem: New Yorkers think everything's available in Queens and condescend to places with more Waffle Houses than sushi bars. The conversation ping-pongs through Southern hospitality ("bless your heart" racism versus loud New York racism), the language barrier of thick accents, and the revelation that Alabama has beaches called "the redneck Riviera." They debate gumbo versus jambalaya, whether "y'all" is humanity's greatest linguistic achievement, and the invented portmanteau "gumbo-laya." The rider's convinced bridge-building requires experiencing parts of America that don't show up on TV. Kareem remains unconvinced but admits Waffle House is fire. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=y3dM0bAIIkI https://www.youtube.com/embed/y3dM0bAIIkI 116 2025-04-01T16:30:28.000Z 3408812 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/people-who-make-you-take-your-shoes-off-should-not-be-allowed-to-entertain 2026-04-15T07:14:16.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/buu9wZ_iCto/maxresdefault.jpg People who make you take your shoes off should not be allowed to entertain A rider with a self-described foot phobia clashes with Kareem over the no-shoes-in-the-house rule. The straphanger insists she'd "rather risk feces on the carpet than see someone's bliss sock tooth or worse, their raw dogs" on her floor. She's terrified of feet. Won't show hers, can't stand seeing others', especially toes poking through holey socks. Kareem fires back that only white people keep shoes on indoors and offers guest slippers as a compromise. She accepts but stands firm on her anti-foot stance, declaring "the foot is the mouth of the leg" and comparing foot exposure to looking inside someone's mouth. It's intimate, uncomfortable, deeply weird. Kareem's never getting that house invite. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=buu9wZ_iCto https://www.youtube.com/embed/buu9wZ_iCto 104 2025-03-31T16:30:08.000Z 191495 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/i-think-that-it-should-be-more-socially-acceptable-to-sit-next-to-somebody 2026-04-15T07:14:22.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/CeYaqjHXaHQ/maxresdefault.jpg I think that it should be more socially acceptable to sit next to somebody Why do we insist on sitting across from each other at restaurants like we're conducting interrogations? A stranger on the subway argues that dining side by side should be the norm, whether you're on a first date or grabbing food with a longtime friend. "When you're sitting in front of somebody like that, it becomes more of an interrogation than a social setting," he tells Kareem. There's less vibes that way. He compares it to someone visiting your apartment and sitting three feet from your face to chat. Weird, right? The conversation shifts to another pet peeve: people asking "How are you?" after years of radio silence. It's been five years. Which day are you even asking about? When the dog died or when the job came through? He's got a foolproof response though: pretty good. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CeYaqjHXaHQ https://www.youtube.com/embed/CeYaqjHXaHQ 115 2025-03-30T16:30:02.000Z 250670 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/i-miss-theremote-control 2026-04-15T07:14:27.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/p3_q6-s9_M4/maxresdefault.jpg I miss theremote control A straphanger declares she misses the remote control, sparking Kareem's impassioned defense of channel surfing as the lost art of taste-making. He argues that growing up with MTV, VH1, Nickelodeon, and "QVC for some laughs" forced him to cultivate his own preferences instead of being spoonfed by algorithms. The conversation veers through Doug Funny and Patty Mayonnaise before landing on a revelation: we've rebuilt cable through streaming services. Why not just go back to the original? The guest's pro-cable stance wins the day. Then things get awkward when she tries to promote AdWorld, the show she co-hosts with Kareem, who flatly refuses to do "free marketing" for his own project. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=p3_q6-s9_M4 https://www.youtube.com/embed/p3_q6-s9_M4 101 2025-03-29T16:30:15.000Z 493628 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/if-you-want-to-date-in-new-york-you-need-to-be-in-therapy-bumble 2026-04-15T07:14:34.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/Ci-uw5gCM7M/maxresdefault.jpg If you want to date in New York, you need to be in THERAPY! ​⁠@bumble A straphanger drops a scorching take: if you want to date in New York, you need to be in therapy. Plot twist? She's a therapist herself who's not currently in therapy. Kareem challenges her logic as she admits she's been burned by "bad boys raw dogging life" and can't date anyone named John, which eliminates millions of potential matches. The conversation spirals into a genius startup pitch: First Date Therapy, where couples attend therapy together on their first date to find out if it'll work. She volunteers to be Kareem's co-host. He clarifies she'd be one of the dates, not the co-host. The confusion is palpable, the chemistry uncertain, but the billion dollar idea? Absolutely real. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ci-uw5gCM7M https://www.youtube.com/embed/Ci-uw5gCM7M 105 2025-03-28T16:30:03.000Z 264559 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/nigel-sylvester-how-nigel-sylvester-became-the-mr-worldwide-of-bmx 2026-04-15T07:14:43.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/L8GmnJ1tIZ0/maxresdefault.jpg How Nigel Sylvester Became the Mr. Worldwide of BMX BMX legend Nigel Sylvester and Kareem take the subway through Queens, which Nigel declares is "the king of all boroughs." Born in Jamaica, Queens, Nigel traces his bike obsession back to doing drifts on a big wheel in his grandmother's driveway at four years old. The moment that changed everything? Watching Dave Mirra at the X Games on TV. Nigel would eventually get signed by Mirra himself. They talk through Nigel's transformation from neighborhood kid to Mr. Worldwide, touching on his viral YouTube success, riding 40 hours a week, therapy session lengths, and the logistics of getting custom Rimowa cases for his bikes to Paris and Tokyo. Kareem confesses he's hesitant about eating oxtail because humans don't have tails, while Nigel recommends the rundown snapper at The Door on Basley and Guy Brewer. The conversation covers Nigel's new Air Jordan collab, that iconic subway platform jump photo, why "selling out" isn't real, and why both airports being in Queens proves it's the portal to the world. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=L8GmnJ1tIZ0 https://www.youtube.com/embed/L8GmnJ1tIZ0 1744 2025-03-27T14:00:32.000Z 28418 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/you-should-only-use-a-spoon-with-a-bowl-and-a-fork-with-a-plate 2026-04-15T07:14:48.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/QexeE7vii6M/maxresdefault.jpg You should only use a spoon with a bowl and a fork with a plate A man's utensil philosophy gets put to the test when he declares spoons belong with bowls and forks belong with plates. His wife sparked this whole crusade by serving him a bowl with a fork, leaving him unable to scoop up every last grain of rice. Kareem pushes back: what about salad? The rider insists it's "white people food" eaten on a plate with a fork, though he personally uses chopsticks for omelets and scrambled eggs. The conversation spirals through pasta protocols, Caesar salads, and ice cream hypotheticals before landing on cereal. Plot twist: this guy pours an entire box into a Tupperware container. Kareem's had enough and bails. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QexeE7vii6M https://www.youtube.com/embed/QexeE7vii6M 120 2025-03-26T16:30:13.000Z 200705 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/sharing-memes-simultaneously-to-other-people-counts-as-emotional-cheating-bumble 2026-04-15T07:14:53.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/goFdq7hoqtE/maxresdefault.jpg Sharing Memes Simultaneously to Other People Counts as Emotional Cheating! ​⁠@bumble Sharing a meme with someone you kind of like means game over, according to a straphanger who takes meme curation very seriously. He tells Kareem that sending memes to multiple people while you're in a relationship counts as emotional cheating, drawing a firm line between friendly music sharing and the deeper intimacy of meme exchange. Songs can be friendly gestures. But memes? You can't ethically share those if you're locked in. The rider even claims he met his wife through memes, saying she sent him "very rare, extremely valuable" content from deep down in the internet. That's how he knew she was the one. When Kareem asks if sharing with multiple people counts as polyamory, the answer is yes. Men are more likely to emotionally cheat this way, apparently. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=goFdq7hoqtE https://www.youtube.com/embed/goFdq7hoqtE 80 2025-03-25T16:30:11.000Z 116412 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/the-earth-became-flat 2026-04-15T07:14:59.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/1dE4G3e7bb0/maxresdefault.jpg The Earth became flat… A rider drops a provocative claim: the Earth became flat in the year 2000. But she's not talking about conspiracy theories. She means culture itself has flattened. Bland Street Coffee in Korea feels identical to a Parisian café, erasing local character through globalization and Instagram's homogenizing force. Kareem pushes to see her algorithm, the supposed culprit behind this sameness. She resists. Hard. Eventually she caves and reveals her Discover page, which turns out to be embarrassingly full of one thing: artisanal sandwiches. The conversation bounces from gentrified coffee culture to algorithmic echo chambers, landing on how social media traps everyone in narrow niches of identical content and experiences. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1dE4G3e7bb0 https://www.youtube.com/embed/1dE4G3e7bb0 90 2025-03-24T16:30:00.000Z 283247 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/ellen-degeneresshould-have-never-been-canceled 2026-04-15T07:15:05.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/7kI9Zs5HIVY/maxresdefault.jpg Ellen DeGeneresshould have never been canceled A stranger with a scorching take argues that Ellen DeGeneres "should have never been cancelled" for the simple crime of being mean. Her reasoning? "If you have power, you have to abuse it." She's fed up with holding women to a different standard than men, pointing to Martha Stewart as the ideal role model since she "committed crime and then she made more money from committing crime." The conversation spirals through Timothy Chalamet, Andy Cohen, and Anderson Cooper, with the rider confessing she hopes Cooper is "just rotten" behind closed doors because she's "so over like good people and kind people." Kareem ends up agreeing with her take. She admits she has "a deep pit of violence" in her despite being kind. Men have compared her to Gone Girl. She can't wait to go to prison. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7kI9Zs5HIVY https://www.youtube.com/embed/7kI9Zs5HIVY 113 2025-03-22T16:30:02.000Z 223507 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/we-need-to-abolish-wi-fi-on-airplanes 2026-04-15T07:15:10.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/_DEqcANO1YE/maxresdefault.jpg We need to abolish Wi-Fi on airplanes A stranger on the subway argues that Wi-Fi on airplanes has "ruined everything that we know and love" since its 2008 debut. Kareem initially dismisses the take, but the rider makes a compelling case: flights used to be the only time you weren't tethered to the world, a miracle of flight free from Deborah's emails. He points to watching Dr. Zhivago and Lawrence of Arabia back-to-back on a tiny screen as proof that the in-flight experience can slap without internet access. The passenger, who reveals he's a filmmaker, insists people aren't responsible adults who can resist the Wi-Fi temptation. Kareem tries to compromise with one hour of connectivity mid-flight, but his conversation partner refuses. No deal. They're pushing the full abolition agenda. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_DEqcANO1YE https://www.youtube.com/embed/_DEqcANO1YE 118 2025-03-21T16:30:12.000Z 1542319 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/cate-blanchett-this-is-cate-blanchetts-sexiest-word-to-say 2026-04-15T07:15:25.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/6SHbN1Qo1yw/maxresdefault.jpg This Is Cate Blanchett's Sexiest Word To Say Cate Blanchett wants leaf blowers "eradicated from the face of the earth." Seriously. She tells Kareem that 30 minutes on a leaf blower creates more pollution than driving a pickup from Texas to Alaska, and she's threatened to fire her Australian gardener if he ever uses one. The conversation spirals from there: why do we blow instead of suck, what happened to rakes, and how leaf blowers are making our lats weaker. They also cover Kareem's signature sunglasses as failed camouflage, whether men should menstruate (Blanchett votes for twice a month), the extraterrestrial nature of childbirth, and why certain compliments mean more coming from certain races. Blanchett's on board for more podcasts, not fewer. She's also done this subway thing four times. Well, three and a half. The two-time Oscar winner just wanted a cheese sandwich after giving birth. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6SHbN1Qo1yw https://www.youtube.com/embed/6SHbN1Qo1yw 1452 2025-03-20T14:00:06.000Z 487821 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/gossip-is-good-for-the-individual-but-bad-for-society 2026-04-15T07:15:32.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/7SFpzoCW1CE/maxresdefault.jpg Gossip is good for the individual, but bad for society A straphanger who just spent three years writing a novel about gossip drops a provocative take: gossiping feels good but it's terrible for you and society. She's a psychologist by training and argues that while research shows gossip releases dopamine and forges bonds, those benefits are hollow. Pleasure from talking about other people? That makes you an asshole at best, a sociopath at worst. Kareem is intrigued. The conversation veers into Freud's rehabilitation, how neuroscientists now validate talk therapy by showing it creates new neural pathways, and the fact that Oedipal theory was never meant to be literal. It's about pheromones, apparently. The rider admits her novel is based on real people. Friends, family, ex-lovers. Kareem calls her out: she's a gossip herself. Guilty as charged. One final nugget: don't have a vendetta unless you're Italian, or it's cultural appropriation. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7SFpzoCW1CE https://www.youtube.com/embed/7SFpzoCW1CE 115 2025-03-19T16:30:02.000Z 346778 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/if-a-barber-f-up-your-haircut-i-should-be-allowed-to-sue-you 2026-04-15T07:15:38.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/BKe3VRNNTJw/maxresdefault.jpg If a barber f*** up your haircut, I should be allowed to SUE you A straphanger argues that barbers who botch a haircut should face lawsuits, not just refunds. The logic? A bad cut can ruin your life for a month, especially if you've got a big date and show up "looking like Mr. Bean." Or Mr. Beast. Kareem pushes back on the idea of taking hair disputes to the Supreme Court, but his conversation partner insists that fear of litigation might actually motivate barbers to care about their work instead of leaving customers stuck with a disaster they still have to tip for. The exchange turns personal when the rider accuses Kareem of having "nice, silky smooth South Asian" hair while lamenting that barbers stereotype him as a tech nerd instead of giving him the fade he wants. Kareem fires back with bowl cut suggestions. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BKe3VRNNTJw https://www.youtube.com/embed/BKe3VRNNTJw 111 2025-03-18T16:30:04.000Z 279558 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/bring-back-segregation 2026-04-15T07:15:44.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/EdQAYxCKeaM/maxresdefault.jpg Bring back segregation A straphanger delivers one of the show's wildest takes: bring back segregation so everyone knows where they're not welcome. His reasoning? "Colors only" restaurants would have seasoning, turmeric, and paprika, while "whites only" spots are stuck with mashed potatoes and mayonnaise. The playlist argument seals it. Carrie Underwood and Kid Rock versus Babyface and Digable Planets. Kareem's intrigued. The conversation spirals through which side gets Italians, Black spending power topping a trillion dollars a year, and Soul Plane nostalgia. Then it gets darker. The rider wants sundown town signs reinstated, the kind that warned Black travelers during Jim Crow. Kareem points out those towns never really disappeared, they just took the signs down. By the end, Kareem's sold on the bit. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EdQAYxCKeaM https://www.youtube.com/embed/EdQAYxCKeaM 115 2025-03-17T16:30:02.000Z 3946803 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/nobody-talks-about-new-york-as-much-as-a-new-yorker-who-doesnt-live-there-anymor 2026-04-15T07:15:50.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/Aat_axhhhTI/maxresdefault.jpg NOBODY talks about New York as much as a New Yorker who doesn't live there anymore A straphanger declares that nobody talks about New York as much as a New Yorker who doesn't live there anymore, kicking off a rapid-fire riff with Kareem about the city's particular absurdities. The conversation veers from the reverse phenomenon (New Yorkers who stay but won't shut up about LA) to the pricing paradox of dollar pizza and thirteen-dollar juice. Rats count as nature. Roaches are small dinosaurs and family men. The passenger's proudest dating achievement? He's been married, divorced, and married again. That's how easy it is. They debate who can outlast the city, landing on the ultimate flex: being a hundred years old in New York. Just buy a place on StreetEasy and never leave. The two keep finishing each other's thoughts, arguing over whose line is whose, insisting nothing gets cut. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Aat_axhhhTI https://www.youtube.com/embed/Aat_axhhhTI 100 2025-03-14T16:30:03.000Z 941998 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/cate-blanchett-leaf-blowers-need-to-be-eradicated-from-the-face-of-the-earth-feat-cate-blanchet 2026-04-15T07:15:55.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/JKmFlnoJ3OU/maxresdefault.jpg Leaf blowers need to be eradicated from the face of the earth. Feat Cate Blanchett Cate Blanchett has a vendetta against leaf blowers, and she's got the stats to back it up. The Oscar-winning actress tells Kareem that 30 minutes on a leaf blower produces more pollution than driving a pickup from Texas to Alaska. She witnessed peak absurdity in Miami: a guy on the beach boardwalk blowing a single leaf, probably chased from five blocks away. The conversation spirals through Washington D.C.'s leaf blower concentration, the rise in cardiac problems from people skipping physical labor, and why everything blows instead of sucks. Blanchett's solution? Pay your kids three bucks an hour to rake. Her kids are 24 now, though, so they're not taking that deal. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JKmFlnoJ3OU https://www.youtube.com/embed/JKmFlnoJ3OU 114 2025-03-13T16:30:08.000Z 1420478 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/jane-goodalls-first-time-on-the-subway 2026-04-15T07:16:03.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/CAkwo6JPV00/maxresdefault.jpg Jane Goodall's First Time on the Subway Jane Goodall, at 90 years old, takes her first ever subway ride with Kareem. They talk about everything from the "good legs" comments she faced as a young scientist breaking into a male-dominated field to whether Laura Dern's character in Jurassic Park was based on her. Goodall reveals she prefers Indian takeaway to restaurants because "they waste money," doesn't use air conditioning even in Africa, and fell in love with Tarzan as a girl during World War II. She bought "Tarzan of the Apes" at a secondhand bookshop with saved-up money, only to realize "he married the wrong Jane." Kareem pitches himself to play Goodall in an upcoming documentary, but she shoots him down. Wrong hair, wrong nose, wrong everything. The conversation turns serious when Goodall explains her real mission: empowering young people to fix the planet that older generations messed up. The episode ends with a behind-the-scenes chat featuring SubwayTakes co-creator Andrew Kuo. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CAkwo6JPV00 https://www.youtube.com/embed/CAkwo6JPV00 3825 2025-03-13T14:13:35.000Z 193622 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/people-with-androids-are-better-lovers 2026-04-15T07:16:09.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/AXfEv31a4Pg/maxresdefault.jpg People with Androids Are Better Lovers A returning Android evangelist doubles down on his most provocative claim yet: people with Androids are better lovers. Kareem isn't buying it. The straphanger argues that Android users are free-thinking rebels who don't cave to peer pressure, the kind of people who are "unhinged" in the best way. Kareem fires back with the usual iPhone user grievances: green text bubbles, low-res images, missing text reactions. His guest insists it's all outdated. "It's 2025. No one talks about blue text, green text." The conversation spirals through universal chargers, vacation itineraries, and passport organization before Kareem reluctantly admits, "the Android girlies that I've been with have been pretty good lovers." The take might be sponsored, but the passion is real. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AXfEv31a4Pg https://www.youtube.com/embed/AXfEv31a4Pg 104 2025-03-12T16:30:03.000Z 438858 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/i-dont-think-everyone-should-have-the-right-to-drive 2026-04-15T07:16:14.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/6-yH7CTESB0/maxresdefault.jpg I don't think everyone should have the right to drive Driver's licenses aren't enough. A stranger on the subway tells Kareem that aspiring drivers should also face a "road rage test" designed to piss them off: think 5:00 p.m. at a New York airport, Apple CarPlay malfunctioning, your mother-in-law criticizing your navigation. The conversation spirals from there. Should test-takers have access to guns and rocket launchers to see if they'd use them? What about rewarding polite drivers with sexual favors? The rider suggests cars should come equipped with "self suck machines" since they're already self-driving and lane-switching. Things get wilder when he admits to jerking off while driving cross-country to Los Angeles. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6-yH7CTESB0 https://www.youtube.com/embed/6-yH7CTESB0 115 2025-03-11T16:30:04.000Z 293069 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/disney-world-is-for-adults-too 2026-04-15T07:16:19.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/3qn7E-en3l4/maxresdefault.jpg Disney World is for Adults, Too. A self-proclaimed Disney adult who actually worked at the parks defends going to Disney World solo, sparking a heated debate with Kareem about whether the Mouse belongs to kids or grownups with disposable income. The rider makes her case: adults get drunk around the world at Epcot, ride Mr. Toad's Wild Ride (a trip about a drunk-driving toad who goes to hell), and drop serious cash on tickets kids can't afford. She even confesses to doing mushrooms at Disneyland on her 34th birthday, getting on Soarin' and realizing "life is actually could be worth living." Kareem's never been but admits he can't really judge. He accepts her for who she is. She's heading to Margaritaville next. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3qn7E-en3l4 https://www.youtube.com/embed/3qn7E-en3l4 111 2025-03-10T16:30:01.000Z 203620 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/rock-stars-without-tattoos-always-make-better-music 2026-04-15T07:16:25.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/532NlCHSHaw/maxresdefault.jpg Rock stars without tattoos always make better music A stranger without tattoos delivers a bold theory: rock stars who skip the ink make better music. He rattles off proof. Joy Division, no tattoos. Radiohead's Thom Yorke, clean skin. The rider's in a band himself, and they've considered matching tattoos on tour but decided against it because having tattoos in the brain is cooler than on your body. Kareem reveals he's actually getting laser removal, which only strengthens the case. Machine Gun Kelly comes up as exhibit A for why too many tattoos equals bad music. The conversation gets philosophical about norms and rebellion before Kareem notices something strange. Why are these guys sitting on each other's laps? https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=532NlCHSHaw https://www.youtube.com/embed/532NlCHSHaw 92 2025-03-08T17:30:00.000Z 530327 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/we-dont-need-anymore-podcasts 2026-04-15T07:16:31.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/TmWuz2oRj0U/maxresdefault.jpg We Dont Need Anymore Podcasts We don't need any more podcasts," a rider declares to Kareem, calling the medium oversaturated. The irony? She's currently being interviewed on one. Kareem fires back that she literally begged to be on the show, while she insists everyone with the ability to talk thinks they can podcast. They're both right. The conversation spirals into meta territory as they bicker about Subway Takes versus Subway Takes Uncut, the long-form version that apparently everyone asked for. She's not buying it, even as she admits she'd listen to this exact conversation. One commenter said Kareem has "a voice that sounds like I have five hot dogs stuck in my throat," which stings. The takeaway: podcasting is dead, except for Subway Takes, which is the last stop on the podcasting train. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TmWuz2oRj0U https://www.youtube.com/embed/TmWuz2oRj0U 115 2025-03-07T17:30:06.000Z 229279 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/men-should-have-to-menstruate-once-a-year-every-year 2026-04-15T07:16:36.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/yXBv4DXAykc/maxresdefault.jpg Men should have to menstruate once a year, every year A woman riding the subway proposes that men should menstruate once a year, every year. But as Kareem questions the logistics, she clarifies the full picture: men would experience the entire monthly cycle, complete with ovulation, hormonal phases, and bleeding. The egg? That's coming out of the butthole. The blood too. Kareem gamely commits to wearing tampons (or "pad sticks," as he initially calls them) until he realizes the reality: women are always in one phase of the cycle. Always. He admits he couldn't handle it, but his interview partner reminds him there's no tapping out. That's part of the rules. The conversation turns oddly sincere as they discuss what men might learn from the experience: readiness for anything, the beauty of life's cycles, and yeah, that it's kind of hard. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yXBv4DXAykc https://www.youtube.com/embed/yXBv4DXAykc 117 2025-03-06T17:30:11.000Z 134784 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/john-c-reilly-doesnt-like-food-videos 2026-04-15T07:16:45.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/hrbREoxI2a4/maxresdefault.jpg John C. Reilly Doesn't Like Food Videos John C. Reilly has strong opinions about restaurant servers asking "How's everything tasting?" He tells Kareem it's a disgusting corporate phrase that's replaced genuine human interaction, and his sons now crack up whenever waiters say it at dinner. The actor also reveals he can't stand watching people eat on camera. Those Carl's Jr. commercials where burgers drip? He literally covers the TV with his hand. "It's too intimate. You should do it in private." The conversation winds through escalator childhood fears, the proper way to dress for air travel (Reilly wears a suit), and why yoga pants outside the gym signal America's pandemic-era decline in standards. He's promoting his new live show Mr. Romantic, where he plays a character who emerges from a steamer trunk desperate for love. Despite his Oscar nomination for Chicago, Reilly admits he has a short shelf life for his own films and rarely rewatches them. He also discusses what makes comedic acting work and shares thoughts on his Steve Brule character, brushing teeth on camera, and leaf blowers. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hrbREoxI2a4 https://www.youtube.com/embed/hrbREoxI2a4 639 2025-03-06T15:01:02.000Z 189393 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/just-drink-more-water 2026-04-15T07:16:52.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/T2rUfKqRLic/maxresdefault.jpg Just drink more water A subway rider declares himself a "wet boy" and diagnoses Kareem as a "dry guy" in this brief but passionate defense of hydration over skincare. The stranger's entire beauty routine? Just water. No soap, no face cleaners, nothing from those incentivized skincare companies pushing products that don't work. His secret weapon is drinking Liquid IV twice daily, before brushing his teeth each morning and night. Kareem shares the frustration: if you know words like "retinol," "hyaluronic acid," or "Gwyneth Paltrow," you're dehydrated. The duo bonds over airplane water indignities, where flight attendants hand you a dentist-office-sized cup when you look like Lord Voldemort. Water is the elixir of life. Beauty supply stores should just install giant fountains. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=T2rUfKqRLic https://www.youtube.com/embed/T2rUfKqRLic 114 2025-03-05T17:30:06.000Z 347833 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/if-you-pay-rent-you-should-own-a-little-bit-of-that-property 2026-04-15T07:16:59.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/wrslQjZHdlU/maxresdefault.jpg If you pay rent, you should own a little bit of that property A rider pitches an audacious housing reform: tenants should earn equity in the properties they rent. After paying $80,000 over two years, he argues he deserves 10% of that back as a stake in the home. The logic? If he's helping pay the landlord's mortgage, he should own a piece of the asset. Kareem's intrigued. The idea evolves into a quasi-co-op arrangement where renters could profit from property appreciation and theoretically take a dump in their old apartment years later (Kareem draws the line there). The pitch gets sillier as it goes: yes to equity, no to repair responsibilities, and maybe renters would stop pouring bacon grease down the sink if they had skin in the game. It's part genuine frustration with housing costs, part fantasy scenario. But the core complaint lands hard. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wrslQjZHdlU https://www.youtube.com/embed/wrslQjZHdlU 110 2025-03-04T17:30:12.000Z 391628 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/certain-compliments-mean-more-from-certain-races 2026-04-15T07:17:05.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/7UaxfxavUXc/maxresdefault.jpg Certain compliments mean more from certain races A stranger on the subway argues that certain compliments carry different weight depending on who's giving them. His theory? If a Black person tells you you're cool, you're actually cool. If an Indian guy says you're smart, you're a genius. But if a white guy calls you smart, "you're a financial white collar criminal." Kareem presses him on fashion: which race gives the best style compliments? Black men, hands down, because "they're not giving out compliments" freely. The conversation spirals through stereotypes about Asian people and resumes, Italian Americans and slurs, and lands on a confession. The guy admits he's on his company's DEI council. The problem? He's racist. "I'm the last one," he says, comparing himself to immigrants who close the door behind them. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7UaxfxavUXc https://www.youtube.com/embed/7UaxfxavUXc 115 2025-03-03T17:30:02.000Z 1179578 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/we-should-throw-all-chiropractors-in-prison 2026-04-15T07:17:09.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/BBWf0uCWuyU/maxresdefault.jpg We should throw-all chiropractors in prison A straphanger delivers a fiery indictment of chiropractic medicine, insisting every chiropractor belongs behind bars. His reasoning? They're "fake doctors" peddling "modern day leech therapy." Kareem pushes back, but the rider doubles down with a personal story about a chiropractor who diagnosed him with "fed up vibes" using a chakra chart instead of addressing his actual back pain. The conversation spirals into absurdist territory when they agree that smoking crack is probably better than seeing a chiropractor. The logic is airtight: "Have you ever seen a person smoke crack and complain about their back?" The rider's current treatment plan? A couple sit-ups every once in a while. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BBWf0uCWuyU https://www.youtube.com/embed/BBWf0uCWuyU 74 2025-02-28T17:39:01.000Z 165612 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/people-who-wear-white-sneakers-do-not-f 2026-04-15T07:17:14.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/IycmkeXSJyA/maxresdefault.jpg People who wear White sneakers do not f*** White sneakers are the mark of someone who doesn't fuck, according to a rider who's got strong opinions about footwear and fornication. He tells Kareem he switched from white sneakers to "hard shoes" and hasn't looked back. The evidence? A recent STD clinic visit (he's fine) where he spotted black Nikes, Timbs, and ballet flats, but not a single white sneaker in sight. Ugg boots are the shoe of someone who has sex. White sneakers signal you're unremarkable, unmotivated, and just follow whatever commercials tell you to buy. The conversation veers into sunglasses on the train (tough, not in a good way) and whether people wearing ballet flats in winter belong to the streets. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IycmkeXSJyA https://www.youtube.com/embed/IycmkeXSJyA 116 2025-02-27T21:36:40.000Z 1480355 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/a-ap-ferg-aap-ferg-wants-to-make-a-movie 2026-04-15T07:17:22.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/8kB1zaUbUkM/maxresdefault.jpg A$AP Ferg Wants to Make a Movie A$AP Ferg's got cowboy boots airbrushed like old-school Timberlands, and he's here to talk Black cinema. "We need more Black people movies," Ferg tells Kareem, rattling off classics from New Jack City to Norbit and explaining why Tyler Perry can't be the only one carrying the torch. The conversation bounces between Ferg's half-million-dollar "Green Juice" video, his wild dog reunion story (Crash went missing for three and a half years before cops found him in Connecticut), and why he'd rather talk to animals than speak every human language. They get into Ferg's group chat called "sewer sounds," the religion of "seism" that believes in "everything and nothing at the same time," and whether humans have lost their divinity. Ferg's convinced his life is already a movie. Kareem's rocking a Matrix-meets-Vampire-in-Brooklyn suit situation. It's all over the place, but that's the point. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8kB1zaUbUkM https://www.youtube.com/embed/8kB1zaUbUkM 677 2025-02-27T15:00:07.000Z 56525 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/dining-out-alone-is-extremely-underrated 2026-04-15T07:17:27.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/Ragf2Ixc9TM/maxresdefault.jpg Dining out alone is extremely underrated Dining alone isn't just acceptable, it's underrated, according to a straphanger who's become a true believer in solo restaurant meals. The rider tells Kareem it's all about not waiting for other people to get hungry, cutting straight to the chase when appetite strikes. Their conversation spirals into the finer points: bar seating versus claiming a whole table for yourself (the "crazier level"), and whether to bring a book, newspaper, or just scroll TikTok while eating steak frites. Both agree that flying solo is the fastest way to become a regular at any spot. The rider confesses to doing a 90-minute tasting menu completely alone, which taught them one thing: it's really hard not to check your phone constantly. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ragf2Ixc9TM https://www.youtube.com/embed/Ragf2Ixc9TM 92 2025-02-26T17:30:06.000Z 416701 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/parents-should-watch-their-sons-make-love-at-least-the-first-ten-times 2026-04-15T07:17:33.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/7jYqjMKtSnE/maxresdefault.jpg Parents should watch their sons make love at least the first ten times 🤣🤣 A straphanger drops one of the wildest parenting takes ever recorded on the New York subway: fathers should watch their sons have sex for the first ten times to coach them through it. Kareem is immediately skeptical. The passenger insists he's serious about education, arguing that too many women have bad experiences because men don't know what they're doing, so dads should be there like referees calling out mistakes in real time. He even suggests fathers could help their sons put on condoms. The logic? If you're told to think about your parents to last longer, why not just have them in the room? Kareem tries to follow the thread but eventually the guy admits he might just be looking for DMs. The cringe becomes too much even for him. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7jYqjMKtSnE https://www.youtube.com/embed/7jYqjMKtSnE 102 2025-02-25T19:35:18.000Z 137032 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/3d-movies-are-trash-and-we-dont-need-any-more-of-them 2026-04-15T07:17:40.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/_29d2ciNlEE/maxresdefault.jpg 3D movies are trash and we don't need any more of them. 🙅🏾‍♀️ A passionate moviegoer has had it with 3D films, and she's not holding back. The glasses are ugly, overpriced, and if you already wear glasses, you're stuck layering them like some kind of vision nightmare. She recounts watching Lion King 3D where "Mufasa fell on me, Simba screamed, I screamed." The trauma was real. Kareem points out she keeps going to these movies, but she insists people just invite her to functions and she says yes for the experience. The conversation spirals into a broader takedown of movie theaters entirely. Why leave home when you can smoke beforehand, skip pants, and eat better snacks? She wants to watch movies lying flat, staring at the ceiling. Kareem agrees that traditional theater seating "is so ghetto." The final dealbreaker? At home, she can talk during the movie without judgment. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_29d2ciNlEE https://www.youtube.com/embed/_29d2ciNlEE 104 2025-02-24T17:30:13.000Z 132490 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/griffin-dunne-stop-serving-entire-meals-during-movies-feat-griffin-dune 2026-04-15T05:00:32.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/PNhTchUQRxE/maxresdefault.jpg STOP serving entire meals during movies. Feat Griffin Dune Griffin Dune joins the show to rant about people eating full meals in movie theaters. He's fired up about the noise, the smells, and how distracting it is when someone's unwrapping a burrito next to you during a quiet scene. Movie snacks are fine, but a whole dinner? That's taking it too far. Griffin doesn't hold back on this one. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PNhTchUQRxE https://www.youtube.com/embed/PNhTchUQRxE 120 2025-02-23T17:30:07.000Z 272773 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/stop-calling-your-parents-so-much-ya-big-babies 2026-04-15T05:00:35.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/BbeeJTP8Kos/maxresdefault.jpg Stop Calling Your Parents So Much Ya Big Babies The host talks to someone who thinks millennials need to stop constantly calling their parents for every little thing and grow up already. It's a generational callout about independence. The interviewee apparently goes hard on the hashtag with some spicy takes about adulting and cutting the parental umbilical cord. Tough love vibes. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BbeeJTP8Kos https://www.youtube.com/embed/BbeeJTP8Kos 107 2025-02-21T17:30:02.000Z 701153 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/if-you-receive-a-copy-of-a-test-in-advance-with-the-answers-its-not-cheating 2026-04-15T05:00:41.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/5qLH6M601aM/maxresdefault.jpg If You Receive a Copy of a Test in Advance with the Answers Its Not Cheating A subway rider argues that getting a test with answers beforehand isn't actually cheating. It's just resourcefulness. Their logic? If someone gives you the material in advance, you're simply being smart by using all available resources to succeed in college. The host pushes back on whether that's really earning your grade, but the interviewee stands firm on their controversial academic philosophy. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5qLH6M601aM https://www.youtube.com/embed/5qLH6M601aM 106 2025-02-20T17:30:00.000Z 322562 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/hasan-minhaj-wants-to-cancel-birthdays 2026-04-15T07:17:50.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/N4G1aVKlwvA/maxresdefault.jpg Hasan Minhaj Wants to Cancel Birthdays Hasan Minhaj has a controversial stance: restaurants need to stop singing happy birthday to adults. "You're making grown adults sing to you because you're 43 years old," he tells Kareem on the train, arguing it's embarrassing for staff, other patrons, and the birthday person themselves. Kareem fights back hard, defending the Dallas Barbecue birthday experience with genuine passion. The two go back and forth on the whole birthday culture industrial complex, eventually agreeing that office birthday cards are pointless ("she doesn't give a [bleep] about everyone's Greyhound bus stall scribble") and that birthday celebrations should maybe end at 16, resuming only at 80 for "alive days." They also get into Minhaj's surprisingly simple hair routine, which boils down to letting natural oils cook and not falling for Big Shampoo propaganda. The conversation touches on Kareem's hairless cats, the cultural significance of pets in Muslim households, and why you should definitely stay inside after applying coconut oil to your hair. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=N4G1aVKlwvA https://www.youtube.com/embed/N4G1aVKlwvA 1845 2025-02-20T13:24:51.000Z 535432 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/no-more-partiful-invites-we-need-to-bring-back-facebook-events 2026-04-15T05:04:10.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/oeJvyZuWpB0/maxresdefault.jpg No more Partiful invites, we need to bring back Facebook Events A guest argues that Partiful has ruined event planning and we need to go back to Facebook Events. They rant about how Partiful invites are annoying and impersonal compared to the good old days of Facebook. The nostalgia is real. The host pushes back on whether Facebook was actually better or if we just remember it that way. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oeJvyZuWpB0 https://www.youtube.com/embed/oeJvyZuWpB0 97 2025-02-19T19:32:13.000Z 201388 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/yung-lean-the-party-is-officially-over 2026-04-15T07:17:55.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/aoKNkpHRg3c/maxresdefault.jpg Yung Lean: the Party is Officially Over Yung Lean declares the party is officially over. The Swedish rapper tells Kareem he's been sober for 366 days, done with "lying and puking all the time." His prescription for society? Romanticize settling down, finding God, learning woodcarving, maybe moving into a cave to "get into the ground of things." He's traded self-absorbed psychopath energy for gratitude and generosity. You can still get freaky and eccentric, he insists, but it's time to make having a girlfriend cool again, to focus on love and simple things. Brotherly love is underrated. Also, Martha Stewart apparently has a reptile living in her brain. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aoKNkpHRg3c https://www.youtube.com/embed/aoKNkpHRg3c 108 2025-02-18T17:30:00.000Z 845012 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/cazzie-david-naps-are-disgusting 2026-04-15T07:17:59.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/vRuEOharlhs/maxresdefault.jpg Naps Are Disgusting Cazzie David has a passionate hatred for naps, and Kareem is right there with her. Naps are disgusting, she declares, launching into a tirade about waking up disoriented with bad breath, puffy eyes, and hangover-like grogginess. She's not buying the siesta excuse either. Resting is fine, but actually going unconscious in the middle of the day? That's insane. You'd have to be stupid to turn your brain off like that. Kareem admits he's maybe napped twice in his life and takes at least three hours to fall asleep, which Cazzie reassures him is totally normal. The verdict: naps are for pets and babies only. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vRuEOharlhs https://www.youtube.com/embed/vRuEOharlhs 91 2025-02-17T17:30:12.000Z 157983 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/gyms-should-supply-uniforms 2026-04-15T07:18:05.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/0no7ELof9fE/maxresdefault.jpg Gyms should supply UNIFORMS A straphanger thinks gyms should provide uniforms to cut down on laundry, but she's got a wild twist: disposable paper gym clothes, like the gowns at the doctor's office. Kareem pushes back hard. Why would anyone want to wear someone else's "soiled" workout gear? The rider keeps using that word, "soiled," which becomes a running joke as she describes throwing away paper dresses after they get sweaty. She hates lugging dirty gym clothes around all day or stuffing them back in her bag. Kareem thinks it's insane. Her response? "You know what else was crazy? The iPhone." He's not buying it. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0no7ELof9fE https://www.youtube.com/embed/0no7ELof9fE 112 2025-02-16T17:30:00.000Z 192278 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/its-out-of-control-that-they-want-to-get-rid-of-columbus-day 2026-04-15T07:18:11.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/xrvfFWA412U/maxresdefault.jpg Its out of control that they want to get rid of Columbus Day An anonymous rider launches into a passionate defense of Columbus Day, insisting Italian Americans aren't advocating for the explorer himself but simply want to keep their holiday. He explains the day's origins: it was given to Italians after a lynching in Louisiana to "shut us up." His solution? Rename it after a beloved Italian American like Sinatra or Joe DiMaggio. "Call it Frank Sinatra Day," he suggests. Kareem floats "Italian American Day" as an alternative, but the rider has a better idea. Mozzarella Day. The conversation captures the cultural identity wrapped up in a controversial holiday, with the rider making clear that Italian American culture is its own distinct thing, a "dying breed" that deserves recognition regardless of what it's called. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xrvfFWA412U https://www.youtube.com/embed/xrvfFWA412U 102 2025-02-15T17:30:09.000Z 4257764 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/conspiracy-theories-are-made-by-the-cia-to-take-attention-away-from-the-real-con 2026-04-15T07:18:16.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/1eJeVqeRxcc/maxresdefault.jpg Conspiracy theories are made by the CIA to take attention away from the real conspiracies Conspiracy theories are made from random guys like me," a straphanger insists, right before Kareem accuses him of working for the CIA. The conversation spirals from there. They trade theories about Pizzagate (which turned out mostly true minus the pizza part), the moon landing (obviously filmed by Stanley Kubrick on a movie set), and the CIA flooding Black neighborhoods with crack (that's not conspiracy, that's fact). Kareem's point cuts through: real conspiracies get discredited when someone infiltrates them and adds silly details as spice. The straphanger knows suspiciously specific details about everything. Kareem keeps needling him about it. By the end, even the headphones might cause brain cancer. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1eJeVqeRxcc https://www.youtube.com/embed/1eJeVqeRxcc 103 2025-02-15T17:30:00.000Z 292488 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/lili-hayes-dating-photos-should-have-expiration-dates-feat-lili-hayes 2026-04-15T07:18:19.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/ODPNSSauUKI/maxresdefault.jpg Dating photos should have expiration dates. Feat Lili Hayes Lili Hayes wants dating app photos to expire every 30 days, and Kareem couldn't agree more. She's on Rya looking for a sugar daddy. Her type? Show me your checking account. Forget Leonardo DiCaprio, she's all about Denzel Washington. After being alone for 15 years, she's done with typical men who don't listen and have "zero brains." She likes Kareem because he agrees with everything and doesn't argue. Something's cooking. And it's not in the kitchen. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ODPNSSauUKI https://www.youtube.com/embed/ODPNSSauUKI 109 2025-02-12T17:30:09.000Z 3676166 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/chicago-is-not-the-midwest 2026-04-15T07:18:25.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/d7VO2GdrfcU/maxresdefault.jpg Chicago is Not the Midwest A straphanger delivers a fiery case that Chicago shouldn't be considered part of the Midwest at all. His proposal? Carve out a whole new region for Great Lake Cities: Milwaukee, Chicago, Detroit, Cleveland, Buffalo, and yes, Toronto too. Kareem pushes back on claiming Canada, but the rider's undeterred. Things get weirder when they riff on Minneapolis ("what else do they got, brother?"), agree that Illinois outside Chicago can fend for itself, and land on renaming Ohio "the Mid-East, respectfully, comma USA." The conversation spirals into cheerful chaos about America needing more regions, not fewer. Put more immigrants in Ohio, apparently. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=d7VO2GdrfcU https://www.youtube.com/embed/d7VO2GdrfcU 102 2025-02-11T17:30:13.000Z 547528 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/every-man-should-have-to-wear-a-speedo-to-the-beach-at-least-once 2026-04-15T07:18:30.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/nrhdddlQr7M/maxresdefault.jpg Every Man Should Have to Wear a Speedo to the Beach at Least Once A stranger on the subway insists that every man should have to wear a Speedo to the beach at least once, framing it as a path to personal freedom and, let's be real, a chance for some eye candy. Kareem pushes back, citing insecurities about comparison and the fear of being exposed. But the rider isn't buying it. "Comparison is a thief of joy," they counter, before launching into a wildly ambitious theory: if America wants European-style public transit and healthcare, men need to embrace European beach culture. Speedos are the answer. The conversation spirals into a gleeful admission that this is about objectification, pure and simple. "Objectify men. Objectify more men. That's 2025 is all about." It's chaotic, horny, and somehow ends with a rallying cry to get naked. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nrhdddlQr7M https://www.youtube.com/embed/nrhdddlQr7M 97 2025-02-10T17:30:08.000Z 128166 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/dianna-agron-the-super-bowl-is-a-strange-name-dianna-agron 2026-04-15T07:18:36.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/US-tHjVVK7I/maxresdefault.jpg The Super Bowl is a Strange Name! (dianna Agron) Dianna Agron thinks the Super Bowl has a weird name. It's been called that since the '60s, when the Kansas City Chiefs owner borrowed it from his kids' Super Ball toy. Strange choice. Kareem agrees at first, but they quickly hit a wall: any rebrand would probably end up as "the City Bank Bowl" or some other corporate nightmare. Agron isn't actually calling for change, just pointing out that it's odd nobody ever challenged it. The owner himself apparently admitted there was probably something better. They both land on keeping it despite the weirdness, though Agron compares it unfavorably to Led Zeppelin (genius name) and favorably to Six Flags (also weird, could use a refresh). The Mall of America? Untouchable. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=US-tHjVVK7I https://www.youtube.com/embed/US-tHjVVK7I 78 2025-02-09T17:30:09.000Z 507608 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/asian-food-should-be-more-expensive 2026-04-15T07:18:41.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/jwIIxP-DPJ4/maxresdefault.jpg Asian food should be MORE expensive A Vietnamese-American straphanger makes a bold argument: Southeast Asian food should cost way more than it does. While Japanese and Korean restaurants have figured out premium pricing, pho and other Southeast Asian dishes remain criminally undervalued. She breaks down the economics with Kareem, comparing a $9 bowl of pho (made with bones, three types of meat, fresh herbs, and hours of labor) to a $30 cacio e pepe that takes five minutes to make. The culprit? Italian branding dominance. Europeans have convinced the world they're the ultimate foodies, but the real value lies elsewhere. Her verdict: you'll eat better in Cambodia than Paris. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jwIIxP-DPJ4 https://www.youtube.com/embed/jwIIxP-DPJ4 106 2025-02-08T19:38:48.000Z 344755 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/emily-didonato-fashion-shows-should-be-longer 2026-04-15T07:18:49.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/rUPOgrA7GrQ/maxresdefault.jpg Fashion Shows Should Be Longer Emily DiDonato thinks fashion shows should be longer. Much longer. The model makes her case to Kareem: after spending hours in hair, makeup, and styling, the actual runway walk lasts only five minutes. Her solution? Two laps, maybe three. She wants to soak up the excitement, the lights, the music. Kareem teases out what he imagines models do after shows: head to Bazaar for Seafood Towers, down some oysters and Aperol Spritzes with their model friends, then fly to Paris for cappuccinos and more oysters. "That's so many oysters," DiDonato protests. But she's serious about extending the most thrilling part of the job. When Kareem asks if this is turning into a therapy session, she leans in: "I want to get on the train. I want to do my job. I want to eat Seafood Towers." The conversation shifts when Kareem admits he's never actually been to a fashion show, prompting DiDonato to demand designers invite him. His response? He's not sure he wants all those invites. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rUPOgrA7GrQ https://www.youtube.com/embed/rUPOgrA7GrQ 117 2025-02-08T17:30:13.000Z 445396 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/cathy-cohen-you-cant-text-someone-just-hey-and-say-nothing-else 2026-04-15T07:18:55.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/d8uTfUIbMsg/maxresdefault.jpg You Can’t Text Someone Just "hey" and Say Nothing Else Cathy Cohen has strong opinions about text message etiquette, and she's not holding back. You can't just text someone "hey" with nothing else. Period. That's blocking territory. Cohen and Kareem bond over the horrors of vague scheduling requests ("are you available on this date" without context is a bait and switch) and debate breakup protocols. One or two dates? Text is fine. Six months? Absolutely not. Cohen suggests writing a letter for the romantically inclined, though that sparks its own debate about response times. They also tackle the bizarre pre-kiss "hey" that people apparently do, agreeing you should just close your eyes and pucker up instead. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=d8uTfUIbMsg https://www.youtube.com/embed/d8uTfUIbMsg 107 2025-02-06T17:30:12.000Z 133537 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/there-should-be-no-cold-water-knob-on-the-shower 2026-04-15T07:19:00.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/nYJwxUls5Y0/maxresdefault.jpg There should be no cold water knob on the shower A straphanger believes showers should only have hot water, arguing that cold showers are for military types or self-punishing Christians. Kareem pushes back hard on this freedom-restricting take. The rider admits he'd "skinny dip into a volcano if I could" and takes 30-minute warm showers every morning after playing cricket in Bangladesh. They spar over post-workout routines and whether Joe Rogan and Huberman are lying about cold plunges. The conversation spirals from shower temperature to American freedoms to water waste, ending with Kareem declaring that 30-minute showers should be illegal. It's a perfectly absurd debate about bathroom fixtures that somehow touches on environmentalism and national identity. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nYJwxUls5Y0 https://www.youtube.com/embed/nYJwxUls5Y0 116 2025-02-04T17:30:09.000Z 440570 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/we-should-ban-cemeteries 2026-04-15T07:19:05.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/YnH9gaDitZo/maxresdefault.jpg We Should Ban Cemeteries We should ban all cemeteries" is the opening salvo from a woman with strong opinions about prime real estate. She wants to dig up the dead and shoot them into space. Kareem's curious: does she work in real estate? Not yet, but if launching corpses to Pluto brings down housing prices in Chicago, she's all in. The alternatives are stark: outer space or keeping bodies at home. She draws one line, though. If you're renting, no backyard burials allowed. A fellow rider vetoes the whole space cemetery plan, but she holds firm on her central thesis. Cemeteries are wasting good land. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YnH9gaDitZo https://www.youtube.com/embed/YnH9gaDitZo 94 2025-02-03T17:30:11.000Z 332780 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/people-should-stop-saying-french-people-look-gay 2026-04-15T07:19:10.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/TJhgX6KTMxY/maxresdefault.jpg People Should Stop Saying French People Look Gay 🤣🤣 A passionate stranger in Paris launches into a fiery defense of French style against accusations that it looks gay. His argument? Straight men have been "culturally appropriating" gay fashion for decades, from skinny jeans to platform sneakers to pouches, all trends gay people wore ten years earlier. He points out that most major fashion brands are French, so if French people look gay, everyone does. The real reason gay people look cool, he insists, is because they're brave enough to take style risks that others won't. Kareem initially disagrees but gets thoroughly convinced, even admitting he bought his outfit specifically for this shoot. By the end, they're bonding over romantic Paris vibes and Kareem's changed his mind completely. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TJhgX6KTMxY https://www.youtube.com/embed/TJhgX6KTMxY 104 2025-02-01T17:30:04.000Z 1947120 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/everyone-is-disabled 2026-04-15T07:19:17.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/5jiJEmESydo/maxresdefault.jpg Everyone is Disabled 🤣 A rider declares that 100% of people are disabled, kicking off a wildly provocative conversation with Kareem about what counts as a disability. Stupidity tops the list. The guest insists around 99.9% of Americans qualify as disabled, arguing that "we're not talking low IQ" but rather people who are "just stupid idiots." When pressed about who suffers most from this particular affliction, he names Kamala Harris before pivoting away from politics. The conversation veers through IBS (his sister has it), arrogance (Kareem's alleged flaw), and the philosophical impossibility of perfection. His closing message to disabled people everywhere? "Solidarity. Tie up the good fight. And when people piss you off, you're about to run them over. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5jiJEmESydo https://www.youtube.com/embed/5jiJEmESydo 111 2025-01-31T17:30:01.000Z 3306011 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/weve-got-to-shut-off-the-internet-for-one-day-each-week 2026-04-15T07:19:22.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/igk45JcVc-g/maxresdefault.jpg We’ve Got to Shut Off the Internet for One Day Each Week A rider with a bold proposal thinks society needs to shut off the internet one day a week, and he's dead serious about it. Sunday's the day, just like Chick-fil-A closing for the Lord. Kareem pushes back on the logistics (what about checking bank balances?), but the stranger insists our brains aren't built to handle infinite content. It's melting our faces. The conversation spirals into DVD collections, with the rider declaring you only need four movies to survive: Heat, Casino, Notting Hill, and I Know What You Did Last Summer. Kareem reminds him about Big. Fair point. Maybe the internet stays on for ninety minutes so Tom Hanks can dance on that piano. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=igk45JcVc-g https://www.youtube.com/embed/igk45JcVc-g 112 2025-01-30T17:30:06.000Z 1309669 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/dogs-should-be-allowed-everywhere-babies-are-allowed 2026-04-15T07:19:27.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/L4BpxVNRfyE/maxresdefault.jpg Dogs Should Be Allowed Everywhere Babies Are Allowed A straphanger with a small dog makes the case that "dogs should be allowed everywhere that babies are allowed," arguing that canines can clean up the messes screaming infants leave at restaurants. Kareem pushes back hard. Should dogs really go to movie theaters? Grocery stores? The dentist? The rider has actually brought their dog to the doctor's office, placing it in shopping carts with a coat underneath. They propose a size-based system when they become mayor. Kareem isn't buying it. He's "more radicalized" against the idea than when they started, though he admits this particular dog, described as "an exceptionally beautiful creature," can go wherever it wants. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=L4BpxVNRfyE https://www.youtube.com/embed/L4BpxVNRfyE 103 2025-01-29T17:30:06.000Z 200341 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/italians-became-white-after-911 2026-04-15T07:19:40.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/cEtns-G5YdI/maxresdefault.jpg Italians Became White After 9/11 🤣🤣🤣 Italians became white after 9/11" is the scorching take an anonymous rider delivers to Kareem, and the two run wild with it. The rider argues that Italians were portrayed as violent, oily criminals through the '90s, occupying a liminal space between white and brown. Then 9/11 hit their indigenous lands (Staten Island, Brooklyn, Jersey) and suddenly the FDNY heroes and Rudy Giuliani transformed the whole group's racial status. Italians are the Indians of Europe, the rider insists. Tony Soprano is basically Gandhi to Jersey people. The conversation spirals through pasta versus biryani, whether millennial Italians like Anthony actually want to be people of color for the spice, and if Luigi Mangione has made them brown again. It's not about skin color, it's about attitude. Mafioso vibes. The whole thing is absurd, provocative, and genuinely funny. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cEtns-G5YdI https://www.youtube.com/embed/cEtns-G5YdI 103 2025-01-28T17:30:07.000Z 6073889 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/people-should-take-saying-bless-you-more-seriously 2026-04-15T07:19:45.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/jieiAnIPdeM/maxresdefault.jpg People Should Take Saying “bless You” More Seriously A stranger in a stylish jacket argues that people need to take "bless you" more seriously because studies show your heart stops for a few seconds when you sneeze. He's terrified of dying from allergies and having to explain it in heaven. Imagine the embarrassment: tough guys talking about drive-bys while you're stuck admitting dandelions took you out. The rider compares his violent sneezes to the little raptor from The Land Before Time, claiming each one sends him briefly to outer space. He blames his dad for passing down allergies, calling them "some bitch." Kareem doesn't have allergies. Lucky man. The conversation spirals into whether "God bless you" can literally save your life and whether having allergies makes you uncool. It does. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jieiAnIPdeM https://www.youtube.com/embed/jieiAnIPdeM 105 2025-01-27T17:30:15.000Z 371610 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/there-are-no-takes 2026-04-15T07:19:50.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/IUBXT-JFxHk/maxresdefault.jpg There Are No Takes A straphanger opens with a paradox: there are no takes. Kareem pushes back immediately, pointing out that this entire show is built on takes, but the rider insists that takes are ephemeral, shifting with time and perspective. Then comes the pivot. Actually, he does have a take. Two, in fact. First, as a father of twin daughters, he can't fathom why women's reproductive rights are up for debate by anyone other than women themselves. Kareem agrees. Second take: we need to treat each other with courtesy, respect, and kindness. Simple as that. Kareem tallies the score: two agreements, one disagreement on the whole "no takes" premise. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IUBXT-JFxHk https://www.youtube.com/embed/IUBXT-JFxHk 91 2025-01-24T17:30:07.000Z 273469 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/men-should-never-be-allowed-to-sit-on-the-subway 2026-04-15T07:20:02.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/gK8O0qmaw2g/maxresdefault.jpg Men Should Never Be Allowed to Sit on the Subway A woman aboard the train declares that men should never be allowed to sit on the subway. Kareem pushes back immediately since he's literally sitting down to film the episode, but she clarifies her stance: no man should sit while a woman or child is standing. She calls it "feminist reparations," a tradeoff where women don't need doors held or dinner paid for, but men absolutely must give up their seats. Kareem agrees in principle, especially for pregnant women and elderly riders, but worries about the able-bodied woman who might call him out for offering. Her response? He won't be sitting anyway. It's romantic, she insists. The debate turns chivalry into a matter of public transit justice, one subway seat at a time. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gK8O0qmaw2g https://www.youtube.com/embed/gK8O0qmaw2g 113 2025-01-23T17:30:07.000Z 278446 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/nobody-should-be-able-to-record-music-ever-again 2026-04-15T07:20:07.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/7WTlvjIvVfw/maxresdefault.jpg Nobody Should Be Able to Record Music Ever Again A rider on the train drops a scorching hot take: nobody should be allowed to record music ever again. Kareem pushes back, but the guy clarifies. There's already enough recorded music to last forever, he argues, so if you want to hear something new, you have to go see it live. He admits he lives in New York City and goes to tons of shows, listening to zero recorded music at home. Then comes the kicker: his first sexual experience happened at a Radiohead concert in 1996 during "Fake Plastic Trees" on the Bends tour. His message? Get out of your room, stop doing "Camy" (whatever that is), and go to a real show where real things happen. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7WTlvjIvVfw https://www.youtube.com/embed/7WTlvjIvVfw 87 2025-01-22T17:30:01.000Z 673961 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/celebrities-should-not-make-political-endorsements 2026-04-15T07:20:11.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/daYXZuNrPuw/maxresdefault.jpg Celebrities Should Not Make Political Endorsements A straphanger has strong opinions about celebrity political endorsements: if you're too famous to go to the grocery store or pay your own taxes, you shouldn't have any say in politics at all. The rider tells Kareem that celebrity endorsements are "the laziest form of activism" a presidential candidate could pursue, though they'd make an exception for Martha Stewart and Snoop Dogg collaborating on an endorsement since they already teamed up for the Olympics. When asked about the worst endorsements from this year, the rider clams up. They're afraid of retribution from the Swifties and the Beehive, despite noting these groups "aren't powerful enough to elect a president." Their solution? Candidates should get endorsements from random people on the subway instead. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=daYXZuNrPuw https://www.youtube.com/embed/daYXZuNrPuw 69 2025-01-21T17:30:05.000Z 708172 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/beds-are-overrated-and-a-scam 2026-04-15T07:20:17.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/y0ja9zYBMPE/maxresdefault.jpg Beds Are Overrated and a Scam 🤣🤣🤣 A straphanger who spent years sleeping on an extra large dog bed argues that beds are an overrated scam. His reasoning? The investment adds up fast. You need a bed frame, headboard, mattress, mattress cover, multiple sheets, and then there's the weekly washing. He paid just $70 for his dog bed and later upgraded to a hammock. But romance intervened. After multiple people refused to sleep with him on the dog bed, he finally caved to societal pressure and bought a real bed. Even then, he skipped sheets entirely, opting for towels instead. The mattress material is unlike any other, he insists. Why add extra fabric? Kareem counters that sheets feel nice on skin, but the former dog bed enthusiast has a solution: just spray disinfectant directly on the mattress. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=y0ja9zYBMPE https://www.youtube.com/embed/y0ja9zYBMPE 114 2025-01-20T17:30:09.000Z 4650650 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/it-should-be-illegal-for-men-to-congregate-in-groups-of-4-or-more 2026-04-15T07:20:24.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/UTFwEG-Erc0/maxresdefault.jpg It should be ILLEGAL for men to congregate in groups of 4 or more A rider drops a scorching hot take: it should be illegal for more than four men to intentionally gather. Her reasoning? "Five men together to me is not hanging out, it's the seeds of an insurrection." She's dead serious. When Kareem pushes back about bachelor parties or guys grabbing beers, she doesn't budge. January 6th started when five guys texted each other, she argues. Men are both dangerous and dumb in groups. Kareem tries the loneliness epidemic angle, suggesting men need their weekly hangouts to stay sane. She's unmoved. Privacy of your own home? Fine. Public congregation? Absolutely not. The debate gets weirdly specific about seating arrangements. Men sitting side by side at bars, avoiding eye contact? That's fine, they're minding their business. But Kareem insists that's exactly what creates the loneliness problem. Neither side gives an inch. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UTFwEG-Erc0 https://www.youtube.com/embed/UTFwEG-Erc0 103 2025-01-17T17:30:07.000Z 592472 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/they-need-to-bring-fighting-back-to-the-nba 2026-04-15T07:20:30.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/MiiDxaAN6kc/maxresdefault.jpg They Need to Bring Fighting Back to the NBA A straphanger wants fighting back in the NBA, specifically the 1990s-era brawls where teams hired guys like Rick Mahorn just to throw hands. Kareem warns him about getting called "unk" in the comments for not knowing his basketball history. The conversation spirals into TikTok's looming ban, how young people decide whether to rob you on the street, and the rider's survival strategy of pretending to be Kenan Thompson from SNL. He's 46 and unbothered. The take about violence in sports gets overshadowed by riffs on aging, social media mortality, and the very real fear of Gen Z. It's chaotic wisdom from someone who claims AOL is still there for him while the rest of us jump platforms like desperate rats. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MiiDxaAN6kc https://www.youtube.com/embed/MiiDxaAN6kc 107 2025-01-16T17:30:04.000Z 1790385 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/there-are-too-many-states-in-america-we-need-to-get-rid-of-ten 2026-04-15T07:20:35.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/RpAg7-cqGl8/maxresdefault.jpg There are too many states in America! We need to get rid of ten A straphanger has a radical plan: America needs to lose ten states. Kareem hears him out as he methodically restructures the union, starting with the Dakotas becoming one state and Rhode Island getting absorbed back into Massachusetts as a "vestigial organ." Alabama and Mississippi merge. Idaho, Montana, and Wyoming become one. The proposals get wilder: selling Alaska to Canada in exchange for British Columbia and part of Ontario ("Drake for oil"), then letting Hawaii vote on independence. Connecticut? It becomes a highway. Another rider jumps in with a Senate concern, prompting a pivot to making sandwiches from the combined states. The logic is shaky, but the confidence is absolute. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RpAg7-cqGl8 https://www.youtube.com/embed/RpAg7-cqGl8 117 2025-01-15T17:30:07.000Z 24552976 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/poppers-are-for-everyone 2026-04-15T07:20:40.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/7aOY9S1dTtM/maxresdefault.jpg Poppers are for EVERYONE A straphanger makes a bold proclamation: poppers are for everyone, not just gay men. Kareem pushes back on the expanding democratic vision of inhalant use, joking that New York City is the only place you can walk into a deli and buy "drugs to sniff on solvent cleaner." The rider rattles off brand names like Premium Rush and Troy Sabon, insisting straight men should "sniff their brains out" and that poppers belong everywhere from Wicked performances to the Rockefeller Center Christmas tree lighting. The conversation spirals when Kareem suddenly reverses course, declaring poppers should be illegal and warning kids to stay away. They land on shaky common ground: it's not just for gay guys. Kareem sarcastically agrees. "It's for kids. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7aOY9S1dTtM https://www.youtube.com/embed/7aOY9S1dTtM 99 2025-01-14T15:28:47.000Z 289419 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/going-to-heaven-would-suck 2026-04-15T05:06:08.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/KXhI1FsFqGQ/maxresdefault.jpg Going to heaven would SUCK The host talks with a subway rider who argues that heaven would actually be terrible. Their reasoning? Eternal existence sounds boring and pointless when there's no real stakes or challenges to overcome. The conversation gets into whether paradise loses its meaning without struggle. Pretty heavy stuff for a train ride. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KXhI1FsFqGQ https://www.youtube.com/embed/KXhI1FsFqGQ 110 2025-01-13T18:12:39.000Z 392867 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/people-should-have-less-takes 2026-04-15T05:06:11.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/x5TJ5_mLyDQ/maxresdefault.jpg People Should Have Less Takes The host meets someone arguing that people need to chill out with constantly sharing their opinions about everything. The irony is beautiful. Here they are on a show dedicated to hot takes, insisting we'd all be better off if everyone just kept more thoughts to themselves. It's a delightfully self-aware moment that basically undermines the entire premise of SubwayTakes while somehow making perfect sense. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x5TJ5_mLyDQ https://www.youtube.com/embed/x5TJ5_mLyDQ 114 2025-01-09T16:38:07.000Z 497894 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/fka-twigs-people-who-walk-through-tsa-barefoot-should-be-banned-from-travel-and-sent-home 2026-04-15T07:20:46.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/-_Z6prS3tPg/maxresdefault.jpg People who walk through TSA barefoot should be banned from travel and sent home FKA twigs has a strong opinion about airport etiquette, and it's rooted in something deeper than mere preference. She tells Kareem that people who walk through TSA barefoot should be banned from travel and sent home, concerned that "foot sweat is going to soak through my socks" when she stands where their bare feet have been. It's called Contact OCD, she explains. A real phobia. Kareem doesn't share the condition and proves it by touching the subway floor, which grosses both of them out. The whole exchange turns a seemingly random airport gripe into a surprisingly vulnerable moment about living with an actual medical anxiety. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-_Z6prS3tPg https://www.youtube.com/embed/-_Z6prS3tPg 59 2025-01-08T16:55:58.000Z 345350 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/if-you-werent-born-in-new-york-you-can-never-call-yourself-a-new-yorker 2026-04-15T07:20:54.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/gTHLpULkarM/maxresdefault.jpg If You Weren’t Born in New York You Can Never Call Yourself a New Yorker A straphanger drops an absolute nuke: if you weren't born in New York, you can never call yourself a New Yorker. Period. Kareem pushes back hard. He was born in Egypt, grew up in Minnesota, and has lived in New York for 13 years. Doesn't that count? Not according to this rider, who insists birth is everything. You're Egyptian, that's it. But there's a twist: the stranger says his own kids, born in New York, are official New Yorkers even though he's suspect as their dad. The logic gets wilder when he suggests 15 years might grant citizenship-style status, only to backtrack immediately. "New York is a brand and they keep trying to infiltrate that," he declares, arguing people are just mad their parents weren't making love in the right place. Kareem signs off as a suspect Egyptian running the best show in New York. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gTHLpULkarM https://www.youtube.com/embed/gTHLpULkarM 117 2025-01-07T16:55:04.000Z 991600 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/democracy-was-a-mistake 2026-04-15T07:20:59.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/kB4dMh9GYVU/maxresdefault.jpg Democracy Was a Mistake Democracy was a mistake, according to one rider who thinks voting should require passing a CAPTCHA test. The kind that asks if you've eaten caffeinated beef jerky and then tells you to sit this one out. Kareem pushes back, asking about monarchies and dictatorships, and the rider admits they might work in the right setting. The real problem? We're letting dumb people vote, like the ketamine heads in downtown Manhattan shoving horse medicine up their noses. Information can't be controlled anymore, so people get political facts from UFC guys with podcasts. The solution: no cool guys who've been on TV should run for office. Presidents should be nerds. By the end, Kareem thinks he's fixed democracy entirely, and the rider completely backtracks to agree. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kB4dMh9GYVU https://www.youtube.com/embed/kB4dMh9GYVU 105 2025-01-06T14:13:46.000Z 321780 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/just-because-you-like-something-on-instagram-doesnt-mean-you-actually-like-it 2026-04-15T07:21:06.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/Gk5KhH1cQ_Q/maxresdefault.jpg Just Because You Like Something on Instagram Doesn’t Mean You Actually Like It A straphanger drops a scorching take: just because you like something on Instagram doesn't mean you actually like it. He likes murder posts to show awareness. Beautiful women's photos? Those get protest likes for being too inappropriate. Kareem pushes back on the logic, but the rider doubles down, insisting the ambiguity is the point. You don't know when he likes something out of liking it. That's intentional. The conversation spirals into the absurdity of Instagram etiquette, where liking means everything and nothing simultaneously, and vulnerability through comments is absolutely out of the question. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Gk5KhH1cQ_Q https://www.youtube.com/embed/Gk5KhH1cQ_Q 104 2025-01-03T21:12:16.000Z 481902 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/ceos-are-people-too-and-they-deserve-more-respect-feat-enron-ceo 2026-04-15T07:21:11.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/trH8Hid1v6A/maxresdefault.jpg CEOs are people too and they deserve more respect feat Enron CEO A straphanger who claims to be the CEO of Enron sparks a debate about whether corporations deserve respect. The rider argues that CEOs' good deeds outweigh the negatives and that they deserve the benefit of the doubt when they make mistakes. Kareem pushes back hard. Things get tense when the conversation turns to Enron's planned January 6th product launch, with the rider insisting people will remember their groundbreaking energy solution instead of the Capitol Insurrection. The exchange culminates in a pointed question about whether corporations are people and if their lives matter. The rider abruptly ends things, pointing out they're literally riding on corporate infrastructure. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=trH8Hid1v6A https://www.youtube.com/embed/trH8Hid1v6A 60 2025-01-02T15:53:42.000Z 1831021 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/the-best-photographers-in-the-world-do-not-call-themselves-photographers 2026-04-15T07:21:17.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/CHcDScs0UPg/maxresdefault.jpg The Best Photographers in the World Do Not Call Themselves Photographers‼️ A rider debates whether the best living photographers even call themselves photographers anymore. He argues that countless people are shooting constantly on their iPhones without considering themselves artists, building archives that'll define what life looked like in the 2020s decades from now. Kareem agrees. He's got 57,296 photos himself. The conversation turns philosophical fast. We're capturing time, the rider says. We're all living like God. Kareem backs off that claim, worried about lightning strikes, and pivots to complimenting the guy's scarf. Turns out he's collecting yellow ones. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CHcDScs0UPg https://www.youtube.com/embed/CHcDScs0UPg 61 2024-12-31T19:07:21.000Z 729272 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/chicago-pizza-is-superior-drinkbodyarmor-nhl 2026-04-15T07:21:22.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/o8wKVrCEIbs/maxresdefault.jpg Chicago Pizza is Superior! 🍕 @drinkbodyarmor @nhl 🚋 # A Chicago native defends her city's pizza supremacy against Kareem's skepticism, insisting deep dish isn't the only option. She name-drops Beggars ("thick but thin") and Italian Fiesta, calling the latter a "super hood delicacy" where real pizza lives. When Kareem pushes back on Chicago being the best city in the world, she's unfazed by comparisons to Paris, Rome, or New York. The conversation veers into pizza-eating habits. Both eat it weekly. Then comes her claim that walking while eating pizza made her grow from 5 feet to 5'8". It didn't work, she admits. The Windy City pride remains unshaken throughout. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=o8wKVrCEIbs https://www.youtube.com/embed/o8wKVrCEIbs 60 2024-12-30T22:15:24.000Z 801804 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/we-should-legalize-smoking-cigs-inside 2026-04-15T07:21:27.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/ynh9wDpS8qs/maxresdefault.jpg We should legalize smoking cigs inside🚬🚭 A straphanger pitches bringing back smoking indoors, though with a twist: let individual establishments choose to be "pro-cig" venues. Kareem isn't sold on the idea, pointing out that your clothes would reek and you'd be "breathing in disgusting toxins." The rider counters that toxins are everywhere anyway. Then things get weird. Kareem declares that anything you inhale into your lungs is bad, but anything you inhale "through your gums or eyeballs or butt cheeks is good." The conversation touches on smoky rooms, fog machines (which apparently smell terrible), and the case for optional smoking sections in restaurants and bars where people can opt in or out. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ynh9wDpS8qs https://www.youtube.com/embed/ynh9wDpS8qs 60 2024-12-28T17:49:53.000Z 539399 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/if-youre-in-a-long-term-relationship-and-you-get-a-dog-together-and-you-break-up 2026-04-15T07:21:33.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/83qVaqz0JAs/maxresdefault.jpg If you're in a long term relationship and you get a dog together and you break up — kill the dog 😱 A straphanger delivers one of the show's most controversial takes yet: if you and your partner split up, you should put down your shared dog rather than subject it to custody arrangements. Kareem pushes back hard, comparing it to killing kids after a divorce. The rider doubles down, insisting it's immoral to waste time shuttling dogs back and forth between households and claiming the same logic applies to himself since his parents have been married for 30 years. The debate gets heated. Kareem's not having it. The conversation ends awkwardly as the guest tries to backpedal on their goodbye. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=83qVaqz0JAs https://www.youtube.com/embed/83qVaqz0JAs 58 2024-12-27T17:22:47.000Z 1917383 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/if-someone-asks-you-to-take-a-pic-of-them-and-youre-bad-at-it-the-least-you-coul 2026-04-15T07:21:38.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/l3vEUfX8JTc/maxresdefault.jpg If Someone Asks You to Take a Pic of Them, and You’re Bad at It, the Least You Could Do is Say No A straphanger shares her frustration with people who take terrible photos when asked. The conversation strikes a nerve with Kareem, who vents about amateur photographers who suddenly think they're Steven Spielberg, crouching down for bizarre angles or somehow getting a finger in the shot. Even worse? The guest recently asked "a very trendy looking woman" to snap a picture at an event, only to discover every single photo captured her mid-sentence with her mouth wide open. It's a missed opportunity. Both agree: if you know you're bad at taking pictures, just say no upfront instead of ruining someone's moment. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=l3vEUfX8JTc https://www.youtube.com/embed/l3vEUfX8JTc 60 2024-12-26T15:15:10.000Z 709301 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/bring-back-cash-tips 2026-04-15T07:21:43.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/Z8K6zXvG6z4/maxresdefault.jpg Bring Back Cash Tips A restaurant worker has strong opinions about digital tipping culture. He wants to "bring back cash tips" and ditch the Toast point-of-sale system entirely. His reason? Uncle Sam sees those digital tips, and they get taxed. Cash-only keeps it off the books. Then he pivots to an even spicier take: pre-teens shouldn't be allowed to dine out without parents. He's tired of 14-year-olds who found restaurants on TikTok, don't tip, and camp out in bathrooms for hours while bleeding tables. Kareem's on board with the whole rant. It's a working-class frustration with modern restaurant economics. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Z8K6zXvG6z4 https://www.youtube.com/embed/Z8K6zXvG6z4 55 2024-12-23T18:41:30.000Z 569137 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/bob-dylan-no-more-musician-biopics 2026-04-15T07:21:48.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/Nng8IN-hlw4/maxresdefault.jpg No More Musician Biopics A straphanger rants against musician biopics, calling them "trauma porny Oscar-baity" depictions of tortured geniuses. Then he contradicts himself. He's definitely seeing the new Bob Dylan movie on Christmas Day. Why? "I just like drama." Kareem pushes further: would he want a biopic about himself? "Of course! I'm literally obsessed with myself." The casting choice gets weird fast. John C. Reilly would play him, he decides, and he'd "allow John C. Reilly to play an Arab man if that Arab man were me." His fellow passenger agrees to the same cultural appropriation bargain. They both give Reilly the pass. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Nng8IN-hlw4 https://www.youtube.com/embed/Nng8IN-hlw4 57 2024-12-22T14:57:51.000Z 529400 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/nyc-is-too-damn-loud 2026-04-15T07:21:53.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/UzuvJFKIDYU/maxresdefault.jpg NYC is Too Damn Loud New York City's noise pollution has one subway rider ready to legislate. Kareem meets a straphanger who's fed up with the city's relentless cacophony and has a comprehensive hit list: jackhammers, car horns, sirens (which apparently run at double the volume of European ones), those infuriating beeping truck reversals, and key fobs. The solution? Ban jackhammers outright. Give every citizen the right to issue anonymous summons by photographing license plates and sending them straight to the DMV. "I would rather be run over" than hear another backing-up beep, the rider declares. Kareem's verdict: they should run for mayor. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UzuvJFKIDYU https://www.youtube.com/embed/UzuvJFKIDYU 58 2024-12-19T13:16:34.000Z 918523 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/dogs-should-have-human-names 2026-04-15T07:21:58.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/dL1wUD-5uuI/maxresdefault.jpg Dogs Should Have Human Names A straphanger insists pets deserve human names, and she's got the proof: her dog Marcus is turning six soon, which is 42 in dog years. Kareem's skeptical at first, questioning why anyone would skip adorable puppy names like Mr. Sleepy for something so ordinary. But the logic wins him over. Calling a 42-year-old dog Butters feels wrong. The conversation spirals into whether human names make dog owners sound less lonely when they say things like "me and Marcus just stayed home and watched a movie." It does. The pair agrees that if your dog is man's best friend, you should put some damn respect on that name, maybe even waiting until the puppy grows up and develops a personality before choosing something dignified. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dL1wUD-5uuI https://www.youtube.com/embed/dL1wUD-5uuI 60 2024-12-17T19:00:30.000Z 1668401 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/pay-freelancers-immediately 2026-04-15T07:22:04.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/0vkWR2wIvWA/maxresdefault.jpg Pay FREELANCERS immediately💰 A frustrated freelancer tears into the Net 30 payment system that keeps creative workers waiting a month for their money. Their argument is simple and brutal: nobody puts pizza on layaway, drug dealers don't accept IOUs, and Uber drivers get paid instantly. So why should graphic designers and musicians wait? "When you go to a pizza shop, you pay," they tell Kareem, pointing out that the delayed payment model only exists for freelancers and creative projects. For jobs under $2,500, payment should happen immediately through Venmo, Zelle, or cash. The rider's frustration builds as they point out the absurdity: landlords don't wait, Netflix doesn't wait, but somehow creative professionals are expected to accept "we'll pay you in 30 days." Their conclusion? Net right the now. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0vkWR2wIvWA https://www.youtube.com/embed/0vkWR2wIvWA 59 2024-12-15T15:21:16.000Z 301340 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/servers-need-to-stop-saying-hows-everything-tasting-feat-john-c-reilly 2026-04-15T07:22:09.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/JVsNYnDl8Ms/maxresdefault.jpg Servers Need to Stop Saying “hows Everything Tasting?” Feat John .c Reilly How's everything tasting?" This corporate-scripted phrase has one rider fired up about the state of modern restaurant service. He tells Kareem that waiters need to stop invading the intimate space of his mouth with their weirdly programmed check-ins. It's disgusting. The even worse offender? "How are the first bites?" The conversation spirals into a broader confession: this guy really doesn't like watching people eat, comparing it to staring into someone's mouth at a table. Kareem pushes back. He's fine with it. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JVsNYnDl8Ms https://www.youtube.com/embed/JVsNYnDl8Ms 60 2024-12-12T16:36:14.000Z 1492045 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/pride-month-is-too-long 2026-04-15T07:22:17.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/apWHhtlZoGE/maxresdefault.jpg Pride Month is Too Long A straphanger argues that Pride should be a week, not a month, comparing it to Mardi Gras as "straight Pride." Kareem fires back that January 6th was straight Pride. His guest disagrees spectacularly, insisting the Capitol riot was actually "the gayest thing I have ever seen in my entire life" because shirtless men in costumes obsessing over another man sounds pretty gay. The conversation spirals into a absurdist catalogue of secretly gay activities. Pickleball? Gay. Boba tea? You're sucking balls out of a nine-inch tube. Water fountains? Also gay. The logic is unhinged, and that's the point. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=apWHhtlZoGE https://www.youtube.com/embed/apWHhtlZoGE 58 2024-12-11T15:27:42.000Z 1715328 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/new-york-city-smoke-shops-are-too-bright 2026-04-15T07:22:22.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/6z-5cl1SETo/maxresdefault.jpg New York City Smoke Shops Are Too Bright A straphanger who doesn't even smoke weed has strong opinions about NYC's explosion of overly bright smoke shops. The lighting is all wrong. Instead of lava lamps and dark basements with Bob Marley posters, these dispensaries look like hospitals. "Zaza Exotics" signs glow on every corner, ruining the city's nighttime vibe. Kareem agrees completely, calling it "hospital D room chic" versus the proper "dorm room chic" weed culture deserves. The rider admits he's happy the city's shutting many of them down, though he worries about getting canceled for commenting on a culture that isn't his. Kareem reassures him this take is universal. Everyone hates the fluorescent glare. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6z-5cl1SETo https://www.youtube.com/embed/6z-5cl1SETo 60 2024-12-10T15:10:25.000Z 330599 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/going-to-film-school-will-not-make-you-a-good-director 2026-04-15T07:22:27.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/8y1xkqgXnkA/maxresdefault.jpg Going to film school will not make you a good director Film school? Not necessary, argues a straphanger who sold her eggs to fund her first movie. Like Robert Rodriguez with his plasma donations, she used her body for art and found the experience more valuable than any MFA program could offer. Kareem's rider insists that going straight from high school to a cinema program creates a cloistered bubble. Nothing new happens to you. What would you possibly have to say? The conversation touches on how film programs often become networking hubs for rich kids and their lawyer fathers, but this director chose a different path. Her logic: trauma is inherently interesting, and lived experience beats academic training when you need to lead a crew and have something meaningful to communicate. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8y1xkqgXnkA https://www.youtube.com/embed/8y1xkqgXnkA 60 2024-12-06T15:32:44.000Z 466570 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/make-life-like-spotify 2026-04-15T07:22:32.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/8qKI4YPU6f8/maxresdefault.jpg Make LIFE like Spotify 🤣🤣 What if the subway worked like Spotify? A rider pitches Kareem on making public transit completely free by plastering ads everywhere, turning trains into "the casino, it's Las Vegas, it's just Times Square." The logic is simple: MTA already runs ads, so why not go all in? Of course, there'd be a premium option for $6 that's ad-free. But why stop at the subway? The conversation spirals into making everything Spotify-style. Rent could be cheaper with ads in your bedroom. Doctor's appointments? Watch an hour of commercials before your shoulder surgery. It's absurd, but both riders are completely serious about trading their attention for free services. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8qKI4YPU6f8 https://www.youtube.com/embed/8qKI4YPU6f8 60 2024-12-05T15:11:06.000Z 3219579 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/montero-lamar-hill-couples-should-sleep-in-separate-beds-feat-lil-nas-x 2026-04-15T07:22:37.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/34djJb6x5jk/maxresdefault.jpg Couples should sleep in SEPARATE beds. Feat Lil Nas X Montero Lamar Hill, better known as Lil Nas X, thinks couples should sleep in separate beds. Actually, separate bedrooms. Maybe separate houses. He and Kareem escalate the bit until they're joking about partners living in different countries, but the core idea is real for Montero: he wants his own bedroom with its own vibe, decorated like the childhood room he never got to have. Sonic the Hedgehog on the walls. His favorite characters everywhere. Kareem brings up Hey Arnold, which Montero immediately dismisses as a bottom ten Nickelodeon show. The whole conversation spirals from a reasonable sleep preference into absurdist territory while revealing something genuine about wanting your own space, your own aesthetic, your own corner of the world. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=34djJb6x5jk https://www.youtube.com/embed/34djJb6x5jk 61 2024-12-03T18:53:50.000Z 158717 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/bay-leaves-are-a-scam 2026-04-15T07:22:42.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/25OcUlOEoPY/maxresdefault.jpg Bay Leaves Are a Scam Bay leaves are a scam, according to a rider who has strong opinions about what belongs in soup. The anonymous straphanger argues that no one actually knows what bay leaves taste like, they're overpriced at "$12 for ten leaves," and they expire after a year. Plus, what other ingredient do you have to fish out of your food after cooking? Kareem calls them a conspiracy theorist. The conversation takes a turn when the rider admits to putting chocolate chips in turkey chili, which they defend by saying they like to "take a handful of those and put them in my mouth and suck on them for a couple minutes." Hot dogs also make an appearance as a suggested bold ingredient. Kareem sides with the bay leaf skeptic. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=25OcUlOEoPY https://www.youtube.com/embed/25OcUlOEoPY 56 2024-12-02T16:47:57.000Z 345992 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/its-not-that-hard-to-tell-twins-apart 2026-04-15T07:22:46.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/7ifN9UxEgm4/maxresdefault.jpg Its Not That Hard to Tell Twins Apart A woman riding the subway insists it's not that hard to tell twins apart, sparking a hilariously specific debate about the etiquette of asking which twin you're talking to. She breaks down the right way to ask ("remind me which one you are") versus the wrong way ("who are you?"). Kareem gets a crash course in twin identification. The conversation veers into Mary Kate and Ashley Olsen trivia, specifically that Mary Kate is an inch taller, which leads to a pointed joke about men and measurements. It's awkward social navigation at its finest. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7ifN9UxEgm4 https://www.youtube.com/embed/7ifN9UxEgm4 60 2024-11-29T15:56:40.000Z 594123 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/50-year-old-white-guys-are-always-right 2026-04-15T07:22:50.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/Nmh7ynLHCxM/maxresdefault.jpg 50-year-old white guys are always right 😂 A 52-year-old rider tells Kareem that turning 50 gave him infinite wisdom. He's always right now. At least it feels that way. He jokes that all his friends experienced the same phenomenon, like "the biggest, best kept secret in the universe" gets revealed on your 50th birthday. But does he actually know everything? Of course not. He admits that guys his age just turn into Joe Rogan, confidently spouting off about anything and everything. When Kareem asks when he was last wrong, the answer's immediate: about 10 seconds ago, regarding everything he just said. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Nmh7ynLHCxM https://www.youtube.com/embed/Nmh7ynLHCxM 56 2024-11-27T18:05:27.000Z 371102 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/sal-is-meant-to-be-eaten-with-your-hands 2026-04-15T07:22:56.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/p8eNUtHEwp0/maxresdefault.jpg Sal is Meant to Be Eaten with Your Hands 🥗 A stranger on the subway drops a genuinely wild take: salad is meant to be eaten with your hands. Kareem is baffled. The rider insists it's about being "more embodied and grounded," suggesting a chip and dip moment with dressing on the side. "Forks? All my homies eat with the fingers." Kareem pushes back on the logistics, picturing Caesar salad chaos, but the rider stays committed to their vision of everyone abandoning utensils entirely. It's the closest thing to touching grass that city people get, apparently. The debate gets surprisingly philosophical before Kareem taps out. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=p8eNUtHEwp0 https://www.youtube.com/embed/p8eNUtHEwp0 60 2024-11-26T16:13:08.000Z 538267 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/the-blue-man-group-is-the-best-thing-white-people-ever-invented 2026-04-15T07:23:00.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/nSehUebvtR4/maxresdefault.jpg The Blue Man Group is the best thing white people ever invented 💙🧢🔵 A straphanger has a bold theory: the Blue Man Group exists to solve world happiness and racism through bald, oiled-up performers banging PVC pipes. Kareem pushes back, wondering why this rider is so obsessed with the Vegas mainstay without ever attending a show. The conversation spirals through hypothetical Hinge matches with Blue Men, debates about whether boats are a superior white invention, and the revelation that Fred Armisen was once a Blue Man. The rider insists they're not obsessed with "these freaks." Sure. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nSehUebvtR4 https://www.youtube.com/embed/nSehUebvtR4 57 2024-11-25T16:02:05.000Z 342097 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/let-this-man-hold-your-baby 2026-04-15T07:23:06.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/d_RvN1-VBnU/maxresdefault.jpg Let This Man Hold Your Baby A man with a simple proposition stops Kareem on the subway: let him hold your baby. At first it sounds like a recipe for disaster, but he's offering something genuinely helpful. Picture yourself at the airport, stressed and juggling a baby while desperately needing that latte. He'd step in. Hold the kid. Give you a break. Kareem's skeptical at first, but the guy makes a solid point about community and helping people haul strollers up subway stairs. That's already half a baby, right? Why not round up? The conversation somehow transforms from creepy stranger danger territory into a weirdly convincing case for trusting your fellow New Yorkers with your most precious cargo, though the guest admits he'd probably say no if someone asked him the same thing. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=d_RvN1-VBnU https://www.youtube.com/embed/d_RvN1-VBnU 60 2024-11-22T14:39:28.000Z 1986899 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/not-going-viral-is-the-new-going-viral 2026-04-15T07:23:12.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/OSlO6gwNFZA/maxresdefault.jpg NOT going viral is the new going viral 🤔 A rider pitches an unconventional social media philosophy: not going viral is the new going viral. Kareem's 100% not on board. But the guy makes his case with passion, celebrating those obscure posts that barely register any engagement. Think grayscale banjo videos from Arkansas or a friend's fedora selfie with a cheeseburger captioned "Went to Chicago this weekend." There's something swaggy about those four-like posts, he insists. You find them through friends who share the weirdest accounts they follow. It's quiet. Peaceful. The rider vows to lean into the aesthetic, posting weirder and weirder content until he vanishes completely from relevance. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OSlO6gwNFZA https://www.youtube.com/embed/OSlO6gwNFZA 60 2024-11-21T15:32:48.000Z 239329 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/restaurants-where-the-vibe-is-better-than-the-food-need-to-be-fined 2026-04-15T07:23:17.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/7eb_1k3-5yU/maxresdefault.jpg Restaurants Where the Vibe is Better Than the Food Need to Be Fined‼️ Restaurants where the vibe outshines the food deserve fines, or at least a disclaimer in the window. That's the hot take from a rider who tells Kareem she's all in on prioritizing food over ambiance. "I'm going for a vibe, I'm going to a bar," she says. Kareem floats the idea of rebranding these spots as "vibe centers" with warning signs about their grass walls and mediocre menus. The conversation veers into whether music belongs in restaurants at all. She wants silence. Kareem pushes back hard, defending the hip-hop he heard at dinner the night before. They can't agree on everything, but the core take lands. Food first. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7eb_1k3-5yU https://www.youtube.com/embed/7eb_1k3-5yU 60 2024-11-19T18:39:55.000Z 952382 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/believe-in-yourself 2026-04-15T07:23:22.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/LUiK8YwTTco/maxresdefault.jpg Believe in Yourself A stranger offers unconventional career advice: publicly claim you're something before you actually are. Fake it till you make it, manifestation style. The rider suggests stealing your friend's guitar, snapping a bathroom selfie, and declaring yourself a musician on your profile picture. Kareem pushes back on the logic. What about lawyers? "I object. I'm a lawyer," the rider jokes, insisting trust follows the claim. The conversation veers into gay signaling online versus in person, with cigarettes apparently serving as the universal cool factor. It's part self-help hustle, part absurdist comedy, ending with light flirtation about armor and hitting on people. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LUiK8YwTTco https://www.youtube.com/embed/LUiK8YwTTco 60 2024-11-18T18:05:20.000Z 229425 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/gwen-stefani-country-livin-is-better-than-city-livin 2026-04-15T05:08:11.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/bVvJgelxGbo/maxresdefault.jpg Country Livin’ is Better Than City Livin The host meets someone on the NYC subway who argues country living beats city life, which is pretty ironic given they're literally underground in Manhattan. They probably get into the usual stuff about space, peace and quiet, maybe fresh air. The Gwen Stefani hashtag is a mystery here. Bold take to make on a packed train. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bVvJgelxGbo https://www.youtube.com/embed/bVvJgelxGbo 61 2024-11-18T00:48:30.000Z 189307 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/its-okay-to-be-the-personality-hire 2026-04-15T05:08:15.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/2qrpcBVQHPQ/maxresdefault.jpg It’s Okay to Be the Personality Hire 😂 The host chats with someone defending personality hires, arguing that bringing good vibes and energy to the workplace is actually valuable. Not everyone needs to be the most technically skilled person in the room. Sometimes being likable and fun matters just as much as raw talent. The guest makes a pretty convincing case that companies need both types of people, and there's nothing wrong with being the one who keeps morale up. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2qrpcBVQHPQ https://www.youtube.com/embed/2qrpcBVQHPQ 60 2024-11-14T14:49:02.000Z 1074856 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/the-appetizers-are-almost-always-better-than-the-entree-iaaaaaaannnnn 2026-04-15T05:08:18.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/Y7Nb43UNL-8/maxresdefault.jpg The appetizers are almost always better than the entree 🧑‍🍳 @iaaaaaaannnnn Ian shares his bold restaurant opinion that appetizers consistently outshine the main course. He argues that apps are where chefs really show off their creativity and flavors, while entrees often disappoint in comparison. It's a take that'll make you rethink your ordering strategy. The host seems skeptical but can't really argue with the logic. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Y7Nb43UNL-8 https://www.youtube.com/embed/Y7Nb43UNL-8 60 2024-11-12T16:59:05.000Z 243328 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/if-teachers-have-to-start-bulletproofing-their-classrooms-they-should-be-paid-2 2026-04-15T07:23:27.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/BfQNjORmRtc/maxresdefault.jpg If teachers have to start bulletproofing their classrooms they should be paid 2 salaries A straphanger floats a stark proposal: if teachers need to bulletproof their classrooms, pay them two salaries. Kareem agrees, though the conversation quickly turns darker as both speakers acknowledge the horror of the situation itself. The rider describes teachers like "Miss K" holding bulletproof clipboards to shield children, calling the whole scenario "awful." Teachers are soldiers now, she says. They're expected to protect and serve. The discussion escalates from there: maybe redirect police department budgets to teachers, start salaries at $200,000, no wait, make it $300,000. It's fierce. It's bleak. And nobody thinks doubled pay actually solves the real problem. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BfQNjORmRtc https://www.youtube.com/embed/BfQNjORmRtc 61 2024-11-11T15:54:30.000Z 390246 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/people-should-stop-buying-electric-cars 2026-04-15T07:23:32.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/T4O_ib-8MeM/maxresdefault.jpg People should stop buying electric cars A climate activist with an electric car delivers a scorching takedown of the vehicles she thinks distract from real environmental solutions. She's sick of "old white men" bragging about their electric SUVs while owning three homes and two heated pools. Electric cars are unusable in emergencies, she argues. If you need to escape New York with only 2% battery, you're dead. Kareem agrees that prioritizing solutions for everyday communities beats catering to "slimy greasy Tech billionaires like Elon Musk." But when he jokingly suggests bringing back gasoline, she draws the line hard. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=T4O_ib-8MeM https://www.youtube.com/embed/T4O_ib-8MeM 60 2024-11-08T17:28:54.000Z 2043527 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/it-should-be-illegal-to-bring-kids-to-weddings 2026-04-15T07:23:42.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/zI0l-lSsgKc/maxresdefault.jpg It should be ILLEGAL to bring kids to weddings A straphanger has a bold solution for parents who bring unruly children to weddings: jail. Straight to jail. Kareem immediately agrees that weddings are adult parties, but the rider clarifies it's not really about the kids. It's about parents who refuse to parent and expect others to do it for them. The punishment? Everyone goes to jail. The whole family. But wait, what if it's a fun jail? Now we're talking. A family-friendly facility with hot tubs and pools, basically a hotel. The twist: this rider actually supports prison abolition. Except for this. Abolish all prisons except the ones for wedding crashers under age ten. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zI0l-lSsgKc https://www.youtube.com/embed/zI0l-lSsgKc 59 2024-11-07T21:26:01.000Z 170430 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/this-londoner-has-a-lot-of-opinions 2026-04-15T07:23:47.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/ILfn02bzoLY/maxresdefault.jpg This Londoner Has a Lot of Opinions A Londoner with strong opinions rattles off a rapid-fire list of takes that span continents and controversies. "America should have never been independent," they declare, before pivoting to Scotland's independence, the decline of public transport etiquette, and the need for more heckling. They want to bring back public booing. The rider also weighs in on Radiohead (overrated), Drake (no more, we're done), and Beyoncé's Renaissance album, praising both the music and marketing. Kareem barely gets a word in as this straphanger steamrolls through opinions on Nando's, Aussies in London, orderly bus queues, and why there's too much countryside. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ILfn02bzoLY https://www.youtube.com/embed/ILfn02bzoLY 46 2024-11-06T15:58:41.000Z 6455595 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/everything-is-political 2026-04-15T07:23:52.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/ZjMUNIq5xTs/maxresdefault.jpg Everything Is Political Everything is political" is the take from a straphanger who insists that silence itself carries a political message. No stance is a stance, they tell Kareem. The rider connects multiple threads: the genocide in Gaza, American police being trained in occupied Palestine, and how brutality abroad links directly to policing at home. Even people who think staying quiet protects them are making a choice. The conversation touches on democracy, humanity, climate justice, and human rights. Their core argument lands hard: if you're not talking about what's happening, you're still talking about it through your silence. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZjMUNIq5xTs https://www.youtube.com/embed/ZjMUNIq5xTs 60 2024-11-04T20:23:40.000Z 162000 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/stop-waiting-for-permission 2026-04-15T07:24:01.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/Z9W27XnXVb0/maxresdefault.jpg Stop Waiting for Permission The cavalry isn't coming." A straphanger shares advice about taking initiative in creative fields, urging artists to stop waiting for permission and create their own opportunities. Don't just open doors for yourself, they tell Kareem. Hold them open for others too. The conversation touches on making things you want to see exist in the world and building your own systems instead of waiting for gatekeepers. It's a rousing call to action that gets at something artists need to hear: if not you for you, then who for you? The energy is infectious, the message clear. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Z9W27XnXVb0 https://www.youtube.com/embed/Z9W27XnXVb0 60 2024-11-02T14:56:20.000Z 496403 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/no-more-artisanal-ketchups 2026-04-15T07:24:06.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/mhnKdv8ROxI/maxresdefault.jpg No More Artisanal Ketchups A straphanger launches into a passionate defense of Heinz ketchup, declaring that restaurants need to stop with the artisanal ketchup nonsense. Kareem's right there with him. The rider goes off: "We don't need your mango chutney ketchup. I just want the taste of Heinz." He also has strong feelings about burger pricing, insisting that fries shouldn't cost extra and that restaurants need to be more generous with condiments instead of treating customers "like an anal." The conversation takes a turn when Kareem admits he likes Miracle Whip, prompting an instant rejection from his companion. "Oh, Miracle Whip's disgusting. Oh, my God, get off the show." It's a spirited debate about condiment loyalty and the mysterious perfection of the Heinz factory. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mhnKdv8ROxI https://www.youtube.com/embed/mhnKdv8ROxI 60 2024-10-31T17:10:00.000Z 853257 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/a-lot-of-queer-people-are-leading-hetero-lives 2026-04-15T07:24:10.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/kJuQ-TnrbXQ/maxresdefault.jpg A Lot of Queer People Are Leading Hetero Lives A straphanger brings a provocative take: a lot of queer people are leading hetero lives. She calls them "quiet queers" who refuse to decolonize their brains and do the deeper work required after coming out. The conversation zeros in on what she dubs "gentrifier bisexuals," people who claim the label but don't dig into their internalized homophobia, staying culturally straight even if their identity says otherwise. It's about ownership without effort. Kareem agrees enthusiastically, landing on the simple truth: do the work, people. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kJuQ-TnrbXQ https://www.youtube.com/embed/kJuQ-TnrbXQ 60 2024-10-30T14:28:50.000Z 106166 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/no-more-reserved-seats-anywhere 2026-04-15T07:24:21.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/Mz8BFu8QHZM/maxresdefault.jpg No More Reserved Seats Anywhere 🚫👎⛔️ No more reserved seats anywhere" is the bold take Kareem throws at a rider who initially pushes back hard. The stranger insists they won't go to movies, concerts, or anything without guaranteeing their spot. But Kareem flips the script, arguing that reservations kill spontaneity and feed social anxiety. Picture this: you walk into a restaurant, face a 45-minute wait, and suddenly the neighborhood is yours to wander. You meet people, absorb the culture, let the experience breathe instead of existing in "the echoes of your memory." The chaos becomes the point. By the end, the rider's completely won over, switching to "100% agree" and hyping up the opinion change. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Mz8BFu8QHZM https://www.youtube.com/embed/Mz8BFu8QHZM 60 2024-10-29T14:33:48.000Z 605766 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/its-okay-to-talk-your-way-out-of-jury-duty 2026-04-15T07:24:26.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/ENafYRG_Cys/maxresdefault.jpg it’s okay to talk your way out of jury duty A straphanger defends talking your way out of jury duty, even though it's technically illegal. Kareem's counterargument? He only wants people who actually want to participate in the justice system, since jurors could be sending someone to prison. The conversation takes a turn when Kareem reveals he was once called for a case where someone sued the MTA for slipping and falling. His reasoning for why he opposed the lawsuit? If everyone sues, prices go up and the transit system suffers. The rider disagrees completely. Suing is the American way to get rich, they argue. In fact, they'd sue Kareem just for having a take. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ENafYRG_Cys https://www.youtube.com/embed/ENafYRG_Cys 59 2024-10-28T17:22:25.000Z 313815 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/cops-on-the-subway-make-us-less-safe 2026-04-15T07:24:31.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/hcrvRlHwL08/maxresdefault.jpg Cops on the Subway Make Us Less Safe A straphanger has strong opinions about police presence underground, and they're pointing to a recent L train shooting where cops shot four people over $2.90. The rider argues officers don't actually prevent the chaos they witness on platforms, from track pushings to robberies. Instead, they want homeless outreach workers and mental health responders. More sanitation staff. Technicians fixing broken escalators. Five-minute trains around the clock. Someone helping the little abuela carry groceries up the stairs, someone giving tourists directions. It's a utopian wish list for the subway system, and Kareem's rider makes it clear that armed officers aren't part of that vision. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hcrvRlHwL08 https://www.youtube.com/embed/hcrvRlHwL08 60 2024-10-26T14:18:46.000Z 1240615 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/if-youre-gunna-bring-your-kid-to-the-skate-park-teach-them-some-dang-manners-fir 2026-04-15T07:24:35.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/1yjViMDLyuw/maxresdefault.jpg If you’re gunna bring your kid to the skate park teach them some dang manners first A skater has strong opinions about parents who treat skate parks like regular playgrounds. The problem? Kids wandering onto obstacles with zero awareness while their parents ignore basic etiquette. When you bring your child to a skate park or basketball court, give them "a little pet talk" first. Let them know people are moving fast. Teach them not to stand on ramps. And if Tony Hawk shows up? You don't approach. You don't ask questions. You wait until he makes eye contact and signals he's just chilling. Kareem gets quizzed on the rules. He passes. But did viewers at home? https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1yjViMDLyuw https://www.youtube.com/embed/1yjViMDLyuw 61 2024-10-24T20:37:07.000Z 330966 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/hasan-minhaj-restaurants-gotta-stop-singing-happy-birthday-to-adults-feat-hasan-minhaj 2026-04-15T07:24:40.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/Ze7ZTJPhQSU/maxresdefault.jpg Restaurants Gotta Stop Singing Happy Birthday to Adults🎂 Feat Hasan Minhaj Hasan Minhaj has a controversial take: restaurants need to stop singing "Happy Birthday" to adults. He argues it's embarrassing for everyone involved, the staff, other patrons, and the birthday person themselves. Kareem pushes back hard, insisting the servers like doing it and comparing it to other service jobs like changing tires or cleaning teeth. Minhaj isn't buying it. He claims restaurant workers are only singing "out of vibe," not because they actually want to serenade diners with cake. The debate gets heated as they disagree on whether making Cold Stone employees perform is humiliating or harmless. This one splits down the middle. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ze7ZTJPhQSU https://www.youtube.com/embed/Ze7ZTJPhQSU 60 2024-10-23T17:03:45.000Z 2804009 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/wellness-is-a-scam 2026-04-15T07:24:46.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/2NtMb5unRIA/maxresdefault.jpg Wellness is a Scam A straphanger delivers a blistering critique of the wellness industry, which rakes in $1.8 trillion annually compared to pharma's $700 billion. The math doesn't add up. America isn't well despite all that spending. She tears into juice cleanses as expensive eating disorders and defends MSG, which a dietitian told her actually has less sodium than regular salt. Kareem's on board. Justice for MSG. The conversation bounces from supplements to Chinese food stigma, questioning why Americans throw money at wellness products that clearly aren't making anyone healthier. It's a rant that connects corporate profit margins to personal frustration, all while sitting on the subway. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2NtMb5unRIA https://www.youtube.com/embed/2NtMb5unRIA 57 2024-10-22T13:28:34.000Z 103453 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/we-are-getting-way-too-much-dopamine 2026-04-15T07:24:50.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/cxpdDROwNbw/maxresdefault.jpg We Are Getting Way Too Much Dopamine A 22-year-old rider thinks we're all getting way too much dopamine, warning that a child from the 17th century would have their head explode after five minutes of TikTok scrolling. Kareem disagrees, wanting more. The conversation takes a sharp turn when the rider brings up "gooning," a practice where people masturbate for hours on end, building up dopamine for a massive release after nine hours. Kareem's intrigued. The rider insists this constant dopamine flooding is why everyone's depressed and anxious. Kareem's takeaway? As long as you don't goon, you'll be fine. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cxpdDROwNbw https://www.youtube.com/embed/cxpdDROwNbw 60 2024-10-19T17:30:40.000Z 239918 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/stop-sending-audio-messages 2026-04-15T07:24:56.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/mEQjwIOxLMk/maxresdefault.jpg Stop Sending Audio Messages A straphanger has a controversial take: stop sending audio messages. Kareem immediately disagrees, arguing it's much easier to send a voice note than type everything out. The rider isn't having it, complaining about having to "listen to a podcast about your day" instead of just reading a quick text. Kareem diagnoses the real issue: "I think the problem is you're not African or Arab." He's right. The rider admits they hate the rambling nature of voice messages, all the "ums" and "I'm just coming out of this coffee shop" commentary. Kareem teases that the rider just doesn't want to listen to other people. The accusation stings. The rider insists they want to talk back, to participate. Kareem offers to add them to his family's WhatsApp group, warning they'll just get laugh reacts to their texts while everyone else sends play buttons. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mEQjwIOxLMk https://www.youtube.com/embed/mEQjwIOxLMk 60 2024-10-18T17:10:40.000Z 1148004 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/this-man-hates-mashed-potatoes 2026-04-15T07:25:01.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/dO0kndug3r4/maxresdefault.jpg This man hates mashed potatoes An Irishman who hates mashed potatoes boards the subway with a controversial opinion. This passenger despises the dish, arguing that potatoes reach their full potential as fries, not mush. Kareem defends mashed potatoes as underrated outside Thanksgiving. But the rider isn't budging. He's dating a Filipino woman whose family assumes all he wants is mashed potatoes, probably because they think he's Irish. The twist? His ancestors were kicked out of Ireland during the potato famine. He's over it. The conversation becomes a hilariously weird meditation on cultural stereotypes, carb preparation methods, and generational trauma over tubers. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dO0kndug3r4 https://www.youtube.com/embed/dO0kndug3r4 61 2024-10-17T15:10:15.000Z 146849 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/beating-your-kids-isnt-that-bad 2026-04-15T07:25:05.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/k8APkWMaULw/maxresdefault.jpg Beating your kids isn’t THAT bad A straphanger shares a controversial parenting philosophy: beating your kids makes them disciplined and successful. Kareem's skeptical at first, but then they land on a consensus. Moms can beat their kids, not dads. The rider, whose Canadian mom disciplined with slides while his Spanish dad let him skip school whenever he wanted, credits living with his mom for his success. Kareem agrees with the mom-only rule. Everyone's already afraid of dad anyway. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=k8APkWMaULw https://www.youtube.com/embed/k8APkWMaULw 58 2024-10-15T16:59:45.000Z 134401 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/dont-talk-to-me-about-pumpkin-spice-until-october 2026-04-15T07:25:10.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/kpU4twjKXcE/maxresdefault.jpg Don’t talk to me about pumpkin spice until October Don't talk to me about pumpkin spice until October" is the rallying cry from an anonymous rider who's had enough of seasonal creep. Actually, scratch that. They don't want pumpkin spice at all, calling it "capitalism in its purest, most disgusting form." Let the leaves fall first. Let the pumpkins hit the floor, then bring in the spice. The conversation pivots unexpectedly when Kareem mentions the biggest climate investment in history just happened. The Inflation Reduction Act, his conversation partner confirms, though they suggest a rebrand: the Pumpkin Spice in October Act. Money for electric vehicles meets fury over September lattes. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kpU4twjKXcE https://www.youtube.com/embed/kpU4twjKXcE 60 2024-10-14T21:58:59.000Z 128449 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/vegan-food-if-delivered-is-no-longer-vegan 2026-04-15T07:25:18.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/xOW6JTJ72y4/maxresdefault.jpg Vegan Food, If Delivered, is No Longer Vegan A former Postmates delivery worker drops a controversial opinion: vegan food stops being vegan once it's delivered. His reasoning? "An animal is suffering bringing it to you," and that animal is him. Kareem points out that Americans tend to care more about animals than humans, which the rider enthusiastically confirms. The conversation spirals into other urban pet grievances. Horses can defecate anywhere without consequences. That should be a fine. Great Danes are too large for city life. And emotional support animals? The rider doesn't mince words: "That's slavery. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xOW6JTJ72y4 https://www.youtube.com/embed/xOW6JTJ72y4 59 2024-10-11T21:37:38.000Z 3418545 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/youve-gotta-sit-with-your-feelings 2026-04-15T07:25:22.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/b8wT6cVWH-A/maxresdefault.jpg You’ve 👏 gotta 👏 sit 👏 with 👏 your 👏 feelings 👏 A woman shares her philosophy on emotional restraint, but admits she hasn't always followed her own advice. When asked about her worst impulse reaction, she confesses to Ubering her best friend's shirt to her workplace during a fight, complete with a dramatic note that said "Take the out if you don't want to be friends, take the out." Psychotic behavior, she calls it now. They're fine these days. The incident taught her to sit with her feelings instead of acting immediately. People deserve grace, she tells Kareem. Everyone has limitations. Give it time. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=b8wT6cVWH-A https://www.youtube.com/embed/b8wT6cVWH-A 61 2024-10-10T14:43:26.000Z 141888 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/america-loves-dogs-too-much 2026-04-15T07:25:27.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/3Dqjlp64_fw/maxresdefault.jpg America Loves Dogs Too Much A straphanger declares that "America loves dogs too much," pointing to people who buy health insurance for their pets but not their kids. Dogs don't belong in restaurants or on trains. Then things take a wild turn. He pitches an outrageous hypothetical: if someone shot up kennels full of puppies instead of schools, white women across America would mobilize to ban AR-15s immediately. Kareem tries to shut it down. The rider clarifies he doesn't like dogs, but his point stands: one kennel tragedy would end gun violence forever. It's provocative logic stretched to its breaking point. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3Dqjlp64_fw https://www.youtube.com/embed/3Dqjlp64_fw 57 2024-10-09T16:58:58.000Z 1899907 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/americans-needs-to-stop-calling-it-soccer 2026-04-15T05:09:48.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/Bbfmqb3Wx-U/maxresdefault.jpg Americans needs to stop calling it “Soccer” A guest with apparent London connections argues that Americans should ditch "soccer" and adopt the rest of the world's terminology: football. The debate touches on linguistic differences and sports culture across the pond. It's a classic argument. The hashtags suggest the guest's probably pretty passionate about proper footy nomenclature and isn't holding back on their opinion about American sports terminology. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Bbfmqb3Wx-U https://www.youtube.com/embed/Bbfmqb3Wx-U 52 2024-10-08T14:45:59.000Z 232797 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/long-live-physical-media 2026-04-15T05:09:52.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/07w0KCb9_Mk/maxresdefault.jpg Long live physical media The host chats with someone who's passionate about keeping DVDs and physical media alive in our streaming age. They make the case that owning your movies beats relying on Netflix's rotating library. Physical media forever! The conversation touches on how streaming services can yank content whenever they want, while a DVD collection stays yours. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=07w0KCb9_Mk https://www.youtube.com/embed/07w0KCb9_Mk 61 2024-10-07T20:09:30.000Z 361594 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/jane-goodall-young-people-must-vote 2026-04-15T05:09:55.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/3gyMGGm9LO0/maxresdefault.jpg Young People Must Vote A passionate guest makes the case that young people need to show up at the polls, especially when it comes to climate and environmental issues that'll shape their future. The conversation touches on Gen Z's political power and references Jane Goodall's activism. It's a rallying cry. The guest clearly believes youth voter turnout could be a total game changer for policy. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3gyMGGm9LO0 https://www.youtube.com/embed/3gyMGGm9LO0 61 2024-10-04T15:47:42.000Z 357881 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/hair-transplants-are-gender-affirming-care-for-men 2026-04-15T07:25:31.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/0iixg-HKs5g/maxresdefault.jpg Hair Transplants Are Gender Affirming Care for Men Hair transplants are "life-saving, gender-affirming care for men." That's the unexpected take from a rider who argues that everyone pursues treatments to match their ideal gender presentation, whether it's bodybuilders getting testosterone or Elon Musk getting hair plugs. Kareem agrees completely. The conversation gets even better when the rider explains that men have a biological clock too: the receding hairline. He and his whole group chat have made a pact to all get hair transplants together when the time comes. The bit ends with a pitch for mutual aid to fund a trip to Turkey for some plugs. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0iixg-HKs5g https://www.youtube.com/embed/0iixg-HKs5g 60 2024-10-03T16:29:03.000Z 1891054 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/no-more-groupchats 2026-04-15T07:25:36.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/bp4ceVJveS0/maxresdefault.jpg No More Groupchats Group chats have gotten out of control, according to a young rider who tells Kareem she's drowning in 125 texts a day from a group that started as a simple fair meetup. The real problem isn't the volume. It's that you can't consent to being added, and leaving means social death. She'd get screenshots of her exit sent back with a "Hey, Rachel, what the..." The solution? Just text her directly. She'll pop in for engagements and big news, but otherwise, group chats feel like communities she never agreed to join. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bp4ceVJveS0 https://www.youtube.com/embed/bp4ceVJveS0 61 2024-10-02T15:26:29.000Z 98441 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/a-ap-ferg-we-need-more-black-people-movies 2026-04-15T07:25:41.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/iJAIO1NTn68/maxresdefault.jpg We Need More Black People Movies A$AP Ferg's got a problem with Hollywood. There aren't enough Black movies anymore. He and Kareem run through the classics that defined their childhoods: New Jack City, Do the Right Thing, Friday, even Norbit. Ferg calls out Tyler Perry for holding it down solo but says the industry needs to "shake things up a little bit more." The conversation turns nostalgic when Ferg shouts out Forest Whitaker for producing Clockers, then quickly pivots to his own ambitions. He's making a movie and needs Disney, Tyler Perry, or Spike Lee to call him. It's a rapid-fire tribute to Black cinema's golden era and a challenge to bring it back. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iJAIO1NTn68 https://www.youtube.com/embed/iJAIO1NTn68 60 2024-10-01T18:24:43.000Z 102098 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/its-time-to-love-again 2026-04-15T07:25:46.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/Q51kYua1mhM/maxresdefault.jpg It’s time to LOVE again People choose to hurt people cuz it's too difficult to heal." That's the raw diagnosis from a straphanger who gets real with Kareem about why so many of us stay stuck in our pain. Even with mental health resources everywhere, healing childhood trauma is just too hard for most people, so they become villains instead. But this rider isn't having it. Their prescription? Find that trauma, cry it out, and push through with love. Cut off anyone who doesn't support your peace, even family, because "blood is sucking the water, but not your peace." It's tough love advice. Kareem's on board. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Q51kYua1mhM https://www.youtube.com/embed/Q51kYua1mhM 59 2024-09-30T14:58:13.000Z 196489 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/is-she-right-or-is-she-wrong 2026-04-15T07:25:52.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/tSFQwLPt688/maxresdefault.jpg Is She Right or is She Wrong? A straphanger claims she's got perfect chopstick form, but she's not here to judge anyone who reaches for a fork at Chinese restaurants. Well, sort of. She tells Kareem it's not embarrassing to ask for utensils because everyone should enjoy their food their own way, even if watching chopstick novices eat "pains" her. The contradiction runs deep. When Kareem pushes back on whether stabbing a dumpling with a fork is acceptable, she insists that's how you can enjoy it, though definitely not how you're supposed to eat it. She admits her own mother sometimes needs a fork when she wants to "shovel the food in." Kareem isn't buying the tolerance act and calls out the take for what it is: judgment dressed up as open-mindedness. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tSFQwLPt688 https://www.youtube.com/embed/tSFQwLPt688 60 2024-09-29T16:17:17.000Z 1164775 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/humiliation-is-good 2026-04-15T07:25:56.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/MCJxZU_-xE8/maxresdefault.jpg Humiliation is GOOD A writer on the train tells Kareem that humiliation is the most important human emotion. It keeps you grounded. Prevents you from taking yourself too seriously. And it's fertile ground for essays, which apparently need that tiny seed of embarrassment to grow. When pressed for her most humiliating moment of the week, she confesses to accidentally spitting gum onto a Fashion Week runway and getting it stuck under her boot while trying to catch it. As for her most humiliating moment ever? That's impossible to quantify, though she did pee her pants last week and thought it was pretty cool. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MCJxZU_-xE8 https://www.youtube.com/embed/MCJxZU_-xE8 60 2024-09-29T14:20:51.000Z 166101 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/the-ipad-is-the-problem-do-we-abolish-ipads-at-checkouts-in-america 2026-04-15T07:26:01.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/llGINTrn-pM/maxresdefault.jpg The iPad is the problem. Do we abolish iPads at checkouts in America? The iPad is the enemy. A stranger on the subway zeroes in on what's really driving America's tipping crisis: that ubiquitous tablet at checkout, flipping around to guilt you into 20% on a bag of weed at the dispensary. Kareem and his conversation partner agree tipping is necessary when someone's actually doing labor for you, lifting or delivering something. But the iPad? That's different. It's not some grand conspiracy, just a UX designer who added an option that spiraled into perpetual motion capitalism. The real villain isn't the barista or the system exactly. It's the screen. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=llGINTrn-pM https://www.youtube.com/embed/llGINTrn-pM 57 2024-09-28T13:34:40.000Z 58975 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/you-should-not-lower-your-window-shade-during-takeoff-and-landing-during-a-fligh 2026-04-15T07:26:06.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/DG40OrFK_3o/maxresdefault.jpg You should NOT lower your window shade during takeoff and landing during a flight A straphanger has a militant opinion: passengers who lower their window shades on flights should be removed and possibly fined. Kareem pushes back hard, asking why anyone would refuse to "bear witness to the miracle of aviation" and see Earth from 35,000 feet up. The rider admits they'd rather watch Seinfeld reruns or scroll Twitter, but Kareem isn't having it. He argues for vitamin D, for appreciation, for taking just five minutes to look at the planet. They land on a compromise: shades up during takeoff and landing, down at cruising altitude. It's a deal they can make for America. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DG40OrFK_3o https://www.youtube.com/embed/DG40OrFK_3o 59 2024-09-27T14:14:15.000Z 271105 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/british-food-is-disgusting 2026-04-15T07:26:11.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/y97XNudRyCs/maxresdefault.jpg British food is DISGUSTING. 🤢 A stranger tears into British cuisine with zero mercy, declaring "the beans are white, the bacon is white, the toast is white" and calling it all "pale and disgusting." They tell Kareem the only worthwhile food in London comes from Pakistani and Indian restaurants. Fish and chips? Nonsense. "The chips is for burgers." The UK isn't a salad country either, apparently. The produce is so bad this person once flew groceries back from the US on an Aer Lingus flight. Their one exception: British desserts. And they love Brat, though even there they skip most of the menu. It's a brutal takedown. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=y97XNudRyCs https://www.youtube.com/embed/y97XNudRyCs 60 2024-09-26T15:15:19.000Z 187377 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/all-ride-share-apps-should-have-a-smell-rating-lmfao 2026-04-15T07:26:16.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/xYp64EWUq8s/maxresdefault.jpg All Ride-share Apps Should Have a Smell Rating Lmfao A straphanger pitches a radical fix for New York's "stinky summer": ride-share apps should have a smell rating for drivers. Kareem's fully on board with the idea, calling out Ubers that reek and trap passengers with child-locked windows. The conversation spirals when the rider claims he'd score a perfect five out of five on his own smell, only for Kareem to sniff-test him and award a 3.8. Things get weirder. The rider confesses he'd rather smell natural body odor and farts than cologne like "Davidoff Cool Water." Kareem notices the subway car itself smells like farts. The episode took a different direction than intended. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xYp64EWUq8s https://www.youtube.com/embed/xYp64EWUq8s 61 2024-09-25T14:59:17.000Z 65902 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/venmo-me-now-not-later-now 2026-04-15T07:26:21.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/cIpT52A5NLY/maxresdefault.jpg Venmo Me Now! Not Later! Now A straphanger delivers a fiery take about dinner etiquette: if you're at a group meal and someone covers the bill, Venmo them immediately. Don't leave the table. Don't wait for a reminder text. The rider vents about being the only gainfully employed friend in the group, constantly chasing down two or three people for their share after every outing. He's had to track down $80 for pizza. Kareem suggests ditching these friends, but the guy's loyal. Then comes a curveball: Chicago pizza beats New York pizza, and it's not even close. The rider agrees with everything except that last part. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cIpT52A5NLY https://www.youtube.com/embed/cIpT52A5NLY 60 2024-09-20T16:07:09.000Z 290280 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/air-travel-should-be-treated-like-surgery 2026-04-15T07:26:26.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/HEimZJ-69Ek/maxresdefault.jpg Air travel should be treated like SURGERY A rider pitches a wild solution to the misery of air travel: just anesthetize passengers before their flight, load their unconscious bodies onto planes, and let them wake up at their destination. They'd pay $1,000 for the service. Kareem points out that's basically business class money already. The conversation veers into darker territory as the rider admits there's a major trust problem with the whole unconscious body situation, 3D scanning, assault, AI deepfakes, you name it. They acknowledge the barrier to entry would be high. Still, they're convinced that if you're stuck in economy, the surgery approach beats dealing with airports. First class though? That's worth staying awake for. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HEimZJ-69Ek https://www.youtube.com/embed/HEimZJ-69Ek 60 2024-09-19T16:20:12.000Z 497016 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/tipping-has-ruined-america 2026-04-15T07:26:31.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/qM4m0951s0g/maxresdefault.jpg Tipping Has Ruined America. Tipping culture has created a system where "the poor support the poor," according to a fired-up straphanger who argues America's service workers are stuck subsidizing each other's wages. The rider tells Kareem that wealthy elites exploit this guilt-driven model while distracting the public with flashy cultural issues instead of boring structural fixes like living wages and healthcare. Hot take? The solution might involve a coordinated mass refusal to tip. It's radical, sure. The rider acknowledges it sounds "gay and cheesy," but insists collective action is the only way out of the trap, even if Kareem tries to pump the brakes on the intensity. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qM4m0951s0g https://www.youtube.com/embed/qM4m0951s0g 61 2024-09-18T15:24:27.000Z 108962 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/has-tipping-become-an-epidemic-in-america 2026-04-15T07:26:40.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/s67seuyS7G8/maxresdefault.jpg Has tipping become an epidemic in America? Comedian Robby Hoffman declares war on tipping culture, arguing that restaurants have turned customers into unpaid workers while guilt-tripping them with iPads. Kareem brings together Hoffman with comedians Milly Tamarez, Tommy Bayer, and Bobby Condon to hash out where the line should be. Hoffman's position is clear: "If I have to go up to order, I'm not tipping." She points out that tips are already percentages, so inflation automatically increases them anyway. The panel mostly agrees workers deserve living wages, but Tommy pushes back, comparing stiffing a tip jar to refusing a friend's GoFundMe because healthcare should be free. Hoffman's not having it. The debate gets heated when she tells Tommy that being poor as a white man is "embarrassing" given his "leg up." Everyone wants systemic change. Nobody wants to keep subsidizing billion-dollar corporations. But today, right now, someone's still behind that counter waiting. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=s67seuyS7G8 https://www.youtube.com/embed/s67seuyS7G8 1579 2024-09-18T14:58:13.000Z 60900 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/the-world-hates-hijabi-women 2026-04-15T07:26:43.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/RTvYVn2F_CA/maxresdefault.jpg The world HATES hijabI women 🧕 A woman in hijab shares a stark reality with Kareem: the world hates hijabi women, and when you combine women with hijab, "they really hate." She argues that people don't like women choosing what to do with their bodies, whether that's wearing hijab or observing religious practices. The conversation turns heavy when she recounts working at a makeup counter, where a man circled for twenty minutes before jumping over and threatening to rip the hijab off her head and kill her. But she pivots quickly. Just listen to her music instead. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RTvYVn2F_CA https://www.youtube.com/embed/RTvYVn2F_CA 59 2024-09-17T14:36:27.000Z 2634231 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/outside-clothes-in-the-bed-are-okay 2026-04-15T07:26:48.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/COkzU7AM9Sw/maxresdefault.jpg Outside clothes in the bed are OKAY A straphanger defends outside clothes on the bed with zero shame, telling Kareem that not everyone can afford "inside clothes" or has multiple rooms to change in. Some people just have a room with a bed. What are you supposed to do? The rider insists that people who claim they never wear outside clothes in bed are liars, especially those who've hooked up with someone and rolled around in full street clothes. When Kareem asks about confrontations, the conversation shifts to shoes in the house. The rider admits their sneakers are disgusting and even offers to let Kareem smell them. Everyone's going to hate this take, and they know it. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=COkzU7AM9Sw https://www.youtube.com/embed/COkzU7AM9Sw 57 2024-09-16T22:25:36.000Z 90490 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/stop-wearing-flip-flops 2026-04-15T07:26:53.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/14QjknvMKcQ/maxresdefault.jpg Stop Wearing Flip Flops A straphanger declares war on flip-flops in the city, insisting that anyone who wears them in a metropolitan area like New York is "a disgusting person who wants to get a toe infection." The logic? There are "20 different types of strains of fecal matter" in the city on any given day. Dog shit, human piss, vomit. Kareem tries to poke holes in the argument by pointing out that our hands are exposed too, so shouldn't we all wear gloves? The rider isn't having it. That's not practical, he says. The debate gets circular fast, with Kareem playing devil's advocate and the flip-flop opponent holding firm. No body of water nearby? Keep those toes covered. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=14QjknvMKcQ https://www.youtube.com/embed/14QjknvMKcQ 61 2024-09-16T02:31:18.000Z 80329 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/youve-got-something-in-your-teeth 2026-04-15T07:26:58.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/mEpBiZ7D2E0/maxresdefault.jpg Youve Got Something in Your Teeth A stranger on the train sparks a debate about friendship etiquette: should you tell someone they've got something in their teeth? The answer is yes, 100%. But how far should you go? Kareem pushes the question further, asking if physical touch is warranted. The rider insists on consent first, calling them "collabs" and suggesting you wouldn't just shove your finger in someone's mouth without warning. Then things get weird. Kareem pretends there's something on the rider's face, and suddenly they're inches apart, sharing what he calls "a vulnerable moment." It's classic subway wisdom turned intimate contact. If you see something, say something, but maybe ask permission before getting handsy. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mEpBiZ7D2E0 https://www.youtube.com/embed/mEpBiZ7D2E0 60 2024-09-13T15:57:28.000Z 117374 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/romanticize-moving-to-a-small-town 2026-04-15T07:27:04.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/eb4BAjrwgJU/maxresdefault.jpg Romanticize Moving to a Small Town A stranger argues we've glorified city life when we should be romanticizing small towns, where everyone knows your name and anonymity doesn't exist. The conversation gets oddly specific. What if the only plumber in town sleeps with your wife? You still have to hire him. That's small-town reality. Kareem's skeptical, but the rider paints a vivid picture: sitting in your driveway drinking bruskies with the boys, learning the two-finger wave, hanging out in Walmart parking lots in a town of 8,000 people. That's real American culture, he insists. Cancel culture can't survive when there's only one of everything. Kareem practices the wave but doesn't seem convinced. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eb4BAjrwgJU https://www.youtube.com/embed/eb4BAjrwgJU 59 2024-09-12T15:03:03.000Z 263143 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/algorithms-are-ruining-everyones-music-tastes 2026-04-15T07:27:08.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/3PhQrHvAMQ4/maxresdefault.jpg Algorithms are RUINING everyone’s music tastes Algorithms aren't ruining music taste, they're homogenizing it. That's the take from a straphanger who argues Spotify and major labels are creating a narrower pipeline that pushes their biggest cash cows. But here's the twist: he actually loves Spotify Discover and finds music recommendations from random people kind of annoying. Kareem then gets him to review a song he just wrote on the spot. The verdict? Better than Yeezus. A seven out of ten, bumped up to a perfect ten seconds later. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3PhQrHvAMQ4 https://www.youtube.com/embed/3PhQrHvAMQ4 60 2024-09-11T16:11:14.000Z 690855 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/therapy-enables-bad-behavior 2026-04-15T07:27:12.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/ZnT-PjJzIFc/maxresdefault.jpg Therapy Enables Bad Behavior A drag queen on the subway shares her spicy take: therapy enables bad behavior because therapists just agree with everything to keep clients paying. She explains that when she told her therapist she wanted to dress up like a girl, they encouraged her to follow her dreams, and look how that turned out. Kareem asks why she prefers an older woman as her therapist. Mommy issues? Not quite. She insists her real mom was great and even jokingly claims she breastfed until she was 18. The conversation spirals into increasingly absurd territory from there, complete with an offer Kareem probably shouldn't have considered on camera. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZnT-PjJzIFc https://www.youtube.com/embed/ZnT-PjJzIFc 60 2024-09-10T14:42:33.000Z 74519 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/people-are-doing-karaoke-wrong 2026-04-15T07:27:17.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/3cAufiIHOG8/maxresdefault.jpg People Are Doing Karaoke Wrong Karaoke is broken, and this rider knows exactly why. People aren't reading the room. They're singing seven-minute Celine Dion ballads while everyone escapes for a smoke break instead of picking crowd-pleasers that get the whole bar moving. Kareem's guest has strong opinions about selfish song choices like "Bohemian Rhapsody" and champions one simple philosophy: you've got three minutes to make everyone dance, so use them wisely. Her go-to? "Girls Just Want to Have Fun" every single time. If people are heading to the bathroom during your performance, you're ruining the night. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3cAufiIHOG8 https://www.youtube.com/embed/3cAufiIHOG8 59 2024-09-09T14:55:13.000Z 236835 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/halseys-favorite-halsey-song 2026-04-15T07:27:32.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/N8ygdR4wbcM/maxresdefault.jpg Halsey's Favorite Halsey Song Halsey reveals the origin of her stage name: she rearranged the letters in "Ashley" while drunk on the subway and realized it's an anagram for the Brooklyn L train stop. She and Kareem talk about how tragedy breeds comedy, with Halsey sharing that losing all her hair to illness two years ago gave her "an incredible sense of comedy." The conversation careens from stuffy versus runny noses to why "the ass is the window to the soul," from New Jersey pride to Bruce Springsteen worship. Halsey refuses to take the title of Boss even if she collaborated with him. She lists her favorite movies (from Pasolini to "Good Fellas"), explains "pathological demand avoidance," and shares her litmus test for true love: taking your wig off mid-sex. Her favorite Halsey song? "Nightmare. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=N8ygdR4wbcM https://www.youtube.com/embed/N8ygdR4wbcM 398 2024-09-09T14:07:48.000Z 234258 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/alexa-chung-ghosting-is-fine 2026-04-15T07:27:37.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/N0I5bZYUYUk/maxresdefault.jpg Ghosting is FINE Alexa Chung defends ghosting with zero apologies. The model and TV personality tells Kareem it's "so fine" and actually empowering, especially for people pleasers who don't want to explain themselves anymore. Her take gets tactical too: ghosting someone in a situationship makes them come back for more, and you can always return with the classic "I just didn't have service" excuse. She's been ghosted herself. Her response? "That's a them problem." Kareem pushes back slightly, noting you can't ghost just anyone willy-nilly, but Chung's confidence is unshakable throughout the conversation about modern dating's most controversial disappearing act. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=N0I5bZYUYUk https://www.youtube.com/embed/N0I5bZYUYUk 61 2024-09-07T16:07:36.000Z 937813 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/spirit-airlines-does-not-deserve-the-hate 2026-04-15T07:27:43.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/jhJGoVWc628/maxresdefault.jpg Spirit Airlines Does Not Deserve the Hate A straphanger comes armed with a controversial opinion: Spirit Airlines doesn't deserve its bad reputation. His logic? Spirit is honest about what you're getting. He flew round trip to Miami for $120 and got exactly a $120 experience, bags included for another $50. Kareem pushes back, pointing out other airlines now nickel-and-dime passengers the same way while pretending to offer premium service. The rider doubles down with a perfect hypothetical: if a door fell off mid-flight on Spirit, he wouldn't even be mad because "I didn't pay for the door to stay on." It's a disrespectful process everywhere, so why not pay bottom dollar for it? By the end, Kareem's convinced. Spirit Air wins. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jhJGoVWc628 https://www.youtube.com/embed/jhJGoVWc628 60 2024-09-05T13:32:59.000Z 12015100 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/rock-n-roll-forevaa 2026-04-15T07:27:48.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/Z47oxs1Xav8/maxresdefault.jpg Rock N Roll Forevaa A musician riding the subway declares that rock and roll lives in New York City right now, not in some nostalgic past. Kareem finds someone who's living it. The straphanger credits COVID with creating an intense desire for human connection that's fueling the city's current rock scene. They're not impressed by Oasis reuniting. "Please, for the love of God, I still don't give a fuck about some old guys getting back together," they say, pushing instead for new bands that make you feel something. Their songwriting process? Waiting to get struck by lightning, metaphorically. They're ready for it. The conversation ends with a plug for Telescreens playing live September 7th with Sid Simons at Irving Plaza. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Z47oxs1Xav8 https://www.youtube.com/embed/Z47oxs1Xav8 61 2024-09-04T14:01:13.000Z 94542 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/does-he-make-a-good-point 2026-04-15T07:27:51.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/wfRlz8ZAMak/maxresdefault.jpg Does He Make a Good Point? A straphanger drops a relationship theory that actually stumps Kareem: "Men will get into relationships to have sex, and women will continue to have sex in relationships to have love." He compares lesbian relationships to authentic Chinese food and gay male relationships to P.F. Chang's. Both delicious, but one's the real deal. Kareem fires back with his own spicy observation about what straight couples could learn from queer relationships. The rider admits it's the first time he's been mind-blown on the show. That sesame chicken analogy really landed. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wfRlz8ZAMak https://www.youtube.com/embed/wfRlz8ZAMak 58 2024-09-03T15:06:29.000Z 91206 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/having-a-dog-doesnt-make-you-interesting 2026-04-15T07:27:56.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/0UawvkcymiE/maxresdefault.jpg Having a DOG doesn’t make you interesting Just having a dog doesn't make you interesting," declares a straphanger, kicking off a surprisingly heated debate about canine hierarchy with Kareem. Doodles get torched first. The rider calls them neurotic and anxiety-ridden, noting that even their creator regrets breeding them. Kareem then drops a bomb: Golden Retrievers are the worst. "They're like big cows. It's like having a horse in your house." The conversation shifts when a Chihuahua-weiner dog mix strolls by, suddenly uniting them in appreciation. That's a good boy, they agree. The best breed, actually. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0UawvkcymiE https://www.youtube.com/embed/0UawvkcymiE 60 2024-09-02T14:38:05.000Z 206030 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/new-yorkers-who-hate-la-are-embarrassing-themselves 2026-04-15T07:28:02.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/km9p5Gdco_U/maxresdefault.jpg New Yorkers Who Hate LA Are Embarrassing Themselves A stranger on the subway delivers a take that'll sting some New Yorkers: people who constantly trash LA are "punching down" and embarrassing themselves. New York's already won, so why the hostility? Kareem agrees. The rider points out that New York is "number one on the call sheet," making all the LA-bashing energy seem petty and insecure. The kicker lands hard: most New Yorkers who loudly hate LA eventually move there anyway, like someone in high school protesting "I'm not gay" before inevitably coming out. "Babe, you're gay and you're moving to LA. I'll see you at Atar." It's a sharp read on coastal city rivalry, calling out the performative hatred for what it really is. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=km9p5Gdco_U https://www.youtube.com/embed/km9p5Gdco_U 57 2024-08-30T17:40:11.000Z 1988462 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/hes-cookin-tho 2026-04-15T07:28:07.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/X7tVPyUMh8w/maxresdefault.jpg He’s COOKIN’ tho Going to someone's birthday party is the nicest thing you can do for someone, according to an anonymous rider who's got the whole philosophy figured out. He breaks it down for Kareem: either they need bodies to fill the room and avoid embarrassment, they're trying to level up the friendship, or you're helping them hit some kind of bar minimum like a nonprofit fundraising goal. Whatever the reason, showing up matters. Even 15 minutes counts. Kareem's skeptical at first but comes around fast. By the end, he's all in on the birthday party take, convinced that it beats any gift you could buy. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=X7tVPyUMh8w https://www.youtube.com/embed/X7tVPyUMh8w 61 2024-08-29T15:25:06.000Z 2196875 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/tim-walz-cares-abour-americas-gutters 2026-04-15T07:28:12.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/XiQLyAD6NJ8/maxresdefault.jpg Tim Walz Cares Abour Americas Gutters Tim Walz has strong opinions about home maintenance. His take? Gutters are the most neglected part of home ownership, and it's personal for him. Kareem agrees completely, citing basement flooding, ice dams, and men falling off ladders as proof of gutter negligence. The conversation gets surprisingly technical. Walz recommends gutter helmets, which cover the top while letting water through, and reveals he shops at Menards for his downspouts. The best part is his insider tip about the 11% rebate system: you've got to send in your receipts and wait about six weeks, but the money comes back. Both agree gutters matter more than lawns. Zero hesitation. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XiQLyAD6NJ8 https://www.youtube.com/embed/XiQLyAD6NJ8 61 2024-08-28T11:24:38.000Z 172423 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/tim-walz-we-need-to-talk-about-gutters 2026-04-15T07:28:17.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/CnFcqZrfmTc/maxresdefault.jpg We Need to Talk About Gutters Tim Walz has strong opinions about home maintenance. The Minnesota governor tells Kareem that gutters are "the most neglected part of home ownership," and he's not wrong. Kareem agrees, mentioning basement flooding and ice dams. Walz gets specific about the risks: he's seen "many a man" fall off ladders while clearing leaves, which is why he recommends gutter helmets. They keep debris out while letting water through. The conversation turns philosophical when Kareem asks whether well-tended gutters or a well-tended lawn matter more. Walz doesn't hesitate. "I'd go with the gutters, 100%." He admits he judges people by their gutter maintenance. As for where to buy the parts? Menards, naturally. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CnFcqZrfmTc https://www.youtube.com/embed/CnFcqZrfmTc 61 2024-08-27T15:19:39.000Z 53381 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/apple-vs-android-the-great-debate 2026-04-15T07:28:22.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/8UBJDWxYXag/maxresdefault.jpg Apple vs Android: the Great Debate A passionate Android user invokes Karl Marx's theory of conspicuous consumption to explain why people really buy iPhones. It's not about superior technology. According to this Brooklyn straphanger, it's about elitism and showing off. Kareem pushes back, but the rider doubles down with a personal story: she's been ghosted by Tinder dates who went from chatting on the app to blocking her the moment those dreaded green texts appeared. That's discrimination, she insists. The great phone divide isn't just about specs or battery life. It's apparently a dating dealbreaker. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8UBJDWxYXag https://www.youtube.com/embed/8UBJDWxYXag 61 2024-08-27T13:52:11.000Z 88316 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/jack-harlow-and-post-malone-jack-harlow-would-never-abandon-rap-music 2026-04-15T07:28:27.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/V4-UUdQgSIU/maxresdefault.jpg Jack Harlow Would Never Abandon Rap Music Jack Harlow gets praised for staying loyal to rap while Post Malone shifted to country rock. Kareem's guest insists Harlow never misses: no bad songs, no bad fits, always funny in interviews. The compliments take a wild turn when the interviewee declares Harlow has "good Black morals" and seems like "a nice Black guy" who loves his mother. He's the most morally sound white guy ever, apparently. Then comes the kicker about what would happen if Harlow dropped the N-word around him. It's absurd, uncomfortable, and completely unfiltered subway energy. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=V4-UUdQgSIU https://www.youtube.com/embed/V4-UUdQgSIU 45 2024-08-27T13:19:50.000Z 52319 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/punctuation-is-good 2026-04-15T07:28:33.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/Lg46t-g4m3Y/maxresdefault.jpg Punctuation is Good Punctuation in text messages sparks a surprisingly heated debate between Kareem and a stranger who insists that proper grammar is essential, even when texting. She's firmly pro-period, arguing that sentences need clear endings and that casual texting habits will ruin your ability to write professional emails. Kareem pushes back. He's part of the lowercase gang, finding periods aggressive and unsettling. "Thanks period" feels angry to him, like someone's mad. The rider thinks that's ridiculous, though she admits she skips capital letters too, except for names. They go back and forth on whether punctuation makes you seem proper or just passive-aggressive, with Kareem insisting a simple period reads as hostility while she maintains it's just good grammar keeping communication clear. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Lg46t-g4m3Y https://www.youtube.com/embed/Lg46t-g4m3Y 61 2024-08-26T17:34:16.000Z 226925 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/hook-up-with-your-friends 2026-04-15T07:28:38.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/AwFgi1kz1Yc/maxresdefault.jpg Hook up with Your Friends!?!? A rider throws out a spicy take about hooking up with friends, but Kareem catches the contradiction fast. The stranger claims to disagree with friends-with-benefits situations, then immediately describes their ideal scenario: a slow-burn flirt that gradually heats up from casual friendship to dates to something more. Kareem points out the obvious. "I think you're literally describing falling in love." The rider laughs it off, spinning their logic into a closing PSA: "Hook up with a friend today. 1-800." It's a messy argument that reveals someone who just wants romance with people they actually like, dressed up as relationship philosophy. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AwFgi1kz1Yc https://www.youtube.com/embed/AwFgi1kz1Yc 58 2024-08-25T17:46:08.000Z 86486 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/only-people-from-other-countries-should-be-allowed-to-move-to-nyc 2026-04-15T07:28:43.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/w36yUfOsBtw/maxresdefault.jpg Only People from Other Countries Should Be Allowed to Move to NYC A straphanger pitches a bold immigration policy: only people from other countries should be allowed to move to New York City. No other states. Period. Kareem's intrigued. The rider gets specific, proposing newcomers should come from countries labeled "developing, emerging, Global South, or anything like that." Why? The food would be incredible. The vibe might be "too lit" though, with potentially four carnivals running simultaneously. When pressed on preferences, the rider chooses West Indians above all, imagining a New York that's "like Queens instead of just Queens." Current New Yorkers can stay. They're not monsters. But future arrivals? Strictly international only. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=w36yUfOsBtw https://www.youtube.com/embed/w36yUfOsBtw 60 2024-08-23T15:06:27.000Z 1191777 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/vertical-video-has-ruined-civilization 2026-04-15T07:28:48.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/u3NUODIMMM0/maxresdefault.jpg Vertical Video Has Ruined Civilization? A rider with strong opinions launches into a passionate defense of vertical video, calling horizontal filming "one of the worst things that's happened in a hundred years of film making and cinema." Kareem pushes back hard. Your eyes are horizontal, he argues, pointing out that movie theater screens are wide for a reason. The stranger isn't having it. "When you have a phone in front of your face, you don't need vertical eyes to enjoy vertical content." He'd happily attend a vertical film festival. The debate spirals into increasingly absurd territory when he declares "cinema's racist" and suggests horizontal video costs more to produce, making it inherently elitist. It's a ridiculous argument that somehow keeps escalating. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=u3NUODIMMM0 https://www.youtube.com/embed/u3NUODIMMM0 61 2024-08-22T15:06:41.000Z 110641 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/skinny-jeans-are-haram 2026-04-15T07:28:52.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/cPhn6Jnu314/maxresdefault.jpg Skinny Jeans Are Haram Skinny jeans aren't just uncomfortable. They're haram, according to Kareem and a subway rider who's lived through the fashion nightmare firsthand. The stranger recounts a mortifying locker room scene at age 13, when he had to grip a locker while two guys yanked his pants off from behind, one on each leg. The jeans caused back pain, rashes in unfortunate places, and enough grief that he couldn't even bend over to remove them himself. His waist was a 25 at the time, making the whole situation even more absurd. These days? Big jeans only. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cPhn6Jnu314 https://www.youtube.com/embed/cPhn6Jnu314 61 2024-08-22T15:03:22.000Z 105191 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/she-hates-picnics 2026-04-15T07:28:58.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/MJnZ25RfVik/maxresdefault.jpg She Hates Picnics A woman on the train absolutely despises picnics, and she's got receipts. There's seventeen bugs. Seven dips melting in the sun. You can't find your friends. She lays out her grievances with surgical precision: the heat, the inability to get comfortable (even on a friend's bony lap or bony ass), and worst of all, the bathroom situation. When nature calls, you're forced to beg an Italian family running a park cafe for access. Why Italian? "They make good coffee. And I don't know." Kareem agrees picnics are terrible, though this rider admits she went to one just last weekend. She only stopped by at the end though. Don't invite her again. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MJnZ25RfVik https://www.youtube.com/embed/MJnZ25RfVik 61 2024-08-21T14:14:55.000Z 75137 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/your-kids-arent-that-smart 2026-04-15T07:29:02.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/oxpgJmxFnqg/maxresdefault.jpg Your Kids Arent That Smart A rider declares that "your kids are not that smart," recounting how everyone fawned over their three-day-old niece's ability to look around and move. Kareem, who just had a baby, immediately fires back. He defends his own kid's genius. The conversation spirals into absurdity as both dig in, the rider insisting parents are exhausting with their constant bragging while Kareem sarcastically plays the offended new parent, asking what exactly the rider's hypothetical genius child accomplished lately before cutting the bit short with mutual irritation. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oxpgJmxFnqg https://www.youtube.com/embed/oxpgJmxFnqg 60 2024-08-20T17:47:31.000Z 2068219 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/wbna-is-better-than-nba 2026-04-15T07:29:07.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/XezeYWeYIno/maxresdefault.jpg Wbna is Better Than NBA A WNBA superfan makes her case to Kareem with an unconventional pitch: the league's superior drama comes from players "getting married and breaking up" on the court. She's dead serious about joining the Liberty, too. At 5'10" with a mid-range jumper (when unguarded), she's been a season ticket holder since 2021 and even bought Dianna Taurasi and Alyssa Thomas a toaster off their wedding registry. Her qualifications? She's gay, has a basketball tattoo, and really, really loves the WNBA. The passion is undeniable. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XezeYWeYIno https://www.youtube.com/embed/XezeYWeYIno 61 2024-08-19T16:29:21.000Z 3082607 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/jack-harlow 2026-04-15T07:29:11.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/KVtLfcQy6LY/maxresdefault.jpg Jack Harlow A rider delivers an impassioned defense of Jack Harlow's character, praising everything from his fashion sense to his moral compass. The stranger argues that Harlow "stayed true" to rap unlike Post Malone's genre shift, and hasn't released a single bad song. But the real thesis? Jack Harlow embodies "good Black morals" despite being white, making him "the most morally sound white guy I ever seen in my life." The monologue takes a sharp turn when the rider jokes about letting Harlow say the N-word. Kareem lets the whole thing ride. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KVtLfcQy6LY https://www.youtube.com/embed/KVtLfcQy6LY 45 2024-08-18T12:46:54.000Z 33441 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/abolish-texting-bring-back-phone-calls 2026-04-15T07:29:15.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/0OPMSPfNhAs/maxresdefault.jpg Abolish Texting Bring Back Phone Calls A straphanger on the subway delivers a bold proclamation: abolish texting and bring back phone calls. Kareem's all in. The rider confesses to making calls from unusual locations, turning the bathroom into an office and even taking phone calls in the shower now that iPhones are waterproof. "It's kind of like being in the sauna," they explain. The conversation gets awkwardly specific when the rider admits to calling while sitting on the toilet, not even needing to go, just conserving time. Kareem draws one firm boundary: don't call while pooping. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0OPMSPfNhAs https://www.youtube.com/embed/0OPMSPfNhAs 61 2024-08-17T21:57:19.000Z 109441 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/americans-have-ruined-the-english-language 2026-04-15T07:29:20.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/vZ2_dKNNvBo/maxresdefault.jpg Americans Have Ruined the English Language A British rider isn't holding back about Americans butchering the English language. He goes after "pacifier" (which sounds like a Jason Statham film, apparently) when "dummy" works just fine. Kareem fires back. Who sneaks in sneakers? Ninjas, maybe. The debate spirals into jumpers versus cardigans, "brv" with no actual "v" sound, and the logic of "innit." The Brit tries an American accent that makes him sound Texan. Kareem defends the homeland with pure capitalism: "We make dollars, not sense. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vZ2_dKNNvBo https://www.youtube.com/embed/vZ2_dKNNvBo 61 2024-08-15T14:16:58.000Z 823840 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/jack-harlow-full-video-on-our-channel 2026-04-15T05:12:46.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/rwUDWxHMibE/maxresdefault.jpg Full Video on Our Channel The host talks to someone who thinks Jack Harlow should be allowed to say the n-word. That's the hot take. It's clearly controversial and gets right to questions about race, hip hop culture, and who gets to use certain language. The conversation tackles whether white rappers should have different rules when they're deep in the culture. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rwUDWxHMibE https://www.youtube.com/embed/rwUDWxHMibE 10 2024-08-13T23:24:21.000Z 102310 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/jack-harlow-mf-is-crazy-for-this-one 2026-04-15T07:29:25.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/wh62h1mqwis/maxresdefault.jpg Mf is Crazy for This One Jack Harlow gets an unexpected endorsement from a stranger who insists the rapper should be allowed to say the N-word. The reasoning? Harlow's donations to the black community supposedly earn him a pass, making him "the John Brown of our time." Kareem pushes back, genuinely baffled. The conversation spirals as the stranger doubles down, claiming Harlow is "more valid" than Drake and even suggesting he might actually be black. When Kareem mentions DJ Khaled and French Montana, both Arab artists who use the word, the stranger dismisses them immediately. It's an absurd take. The logic collapses on itself, but the stranger remains committed to his position, convinced that Jack Harlow's contributions somehow grant him special privileges that other non-black artists don't deserve. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wh62h1mqwis https://www.youtube.com/embed/wh62h1mqwis 61 2024-08-13T15:11:25.000Z 97034 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/jack-harlow-should-jack-harlow-be-able-to-say-the-n-word 2026-04-15T07:29:34.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/1w7qwsROk10/maxresdefault.jpg Should Jack Harlow be able to say the n-word? Jack Harlow. The N-word. Should they go together? Kareem brings writer Saidu Tejan-Thomas Jr., comedians Asad Benbow, Lukas Arnold, and Daddy to debate the viral SubwayTakes clip where one guy actually argues Jack Harlow deserves a pass. The reasoning gets wild fast: "He's donated so much to the Black community," one person claims, calling Harlow "the John Brown of our time." Things spiral into arguments about Obama impressions, whether white people should even listen to rap music, and why Jack Harlow represents an existential threat to Black women everywhere. The conversation veers into everyone's claims to Blackness, with Kareem revealing he's from Troy, New York, his mom's from Sudan, and his dad's from New Jersey. Lukas admits he thought Harlow might be light-skinned until he heard his voice. The consensus? Pretty much everyone says no, except that one guy who thinks Harlow's "more valid to say it than Drake. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1w7qwsROk10 https://www.youtube.com/embed/1w7qwsROk10 1974 2024-08-13T14:02:35.000Z 54902 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/easy-crimes-should-be-legal 2026-04-15T07:29:38.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/xdPr7VmBWTU/maxresdefault.jpg Easy Crimes Should Be Legal A stranger on the subway pitches a wild theory: crimes should be legal if they take "one step or less" to commit. He's already testing this philosophy. After donating $3,000 to charity, he disputed the charge on his credit card to get his money back. The charity keeps the cash, he keeps his cash. Is it fraud? Sure. But it shouldn't be that easy to commit a felony from your phone, he argues, so lazy crimes should just be legal. Kareem points out that not filing taxes is also illegal. The guy hasn't filed in five years. "Catch me if you can," he says. "I'm the brown Leonardo DiCaprio." Then he bolts. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xdPr7VmBWTU https://www.youtube.com/embed/xdPr7VmBWTU 60 2024-08-12T15:53:58.000Z 2561231 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/had-to-cut-him-off 2026-04-15T05:12:59.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/uGoYg79xeHo/maxresdefault.jpg 🫢 Had to Cut Him Off A guest drops the hot take that Woody Allen is innocent, which immediately sets off alarm bells. The host has to cut him off before things go too far. That's a yikes. The episode title says it all with those shocked emojis, this interview clearly went somewhere the host wasn't willing to follow on camera. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uGoYg79xeHo https://www.youtube.com/embed/uGoYg79xeHo 8 2024-08-11T19:14:20.000Z 90080 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/stop-going-to-bars-and-restaurants-unless 2026-04-15T07:29:43.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/81IK7iTYSio/maxresdefault.jpg Stop Going to Bars and Restaurants Unless…. A rider who works in the restaurant industry thinks everyone should stop going to bars and restaurants unless they treat workers right. His proposal? Start asking servers and bartenders if they get health insurance and fair treatment, then boycott the bad spots. Kareem pushes back on the activism angle, but the guy stands firm. He's got insurance at his job. The camera operator Anthony? Not so much. No benefits at all. They're all just hanging out though, so it's fine. Totally fine. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=81IK7iTYSio https://www.youtube.com/embed/81IK7iTYSio 60 2024-08-11T15:50:19.000Z 1494140 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/flirting-is-good-for-your-mental-health 2026-04-15T07:29:47.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/TSLtXzxucvM/maxresdefault.jpg Flirting is GOOD for your mental health A straphanger makes a bold pitch: flirting is essential for mental health. Kareem pushes back, arguing that flirting is stressful and anxiety-inducing. The rider insists we've lost our sense of play since 2020, searching for it in pickleball and trivia nights when we could just leave the house and have playful moments with strangers. It's not about finding a partner. It's about amusement. If they were a doctor, they'd prescribe 30 minutes of walking, 15 minutes of meditation, and 10 minutes of flirting daily. Kareem isn't sold on the sweaty palms being worth it, but the rider stands firm: a little harmless flirting never hurt nobody. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TSLtXzxucvM https://www.youtube.com/embed/TSLtXzxucvM 59 2024-08-10T13:53:30.000Z 86980 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/stop-making-podcasts 2026-04-15T07:29:52.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/yoicee9Vn7I/maxresdefault.jpg Stop Making Podcasts A rider with strong opinions declares that starting a new podcast should be illegal, railing against everyone who "went on Amazon, got a microphone, got the whole kit set up" since the pandemic. He's fine with podcasts about social justice or current events, but thinks anyone talking about "stupid sports, food" is just a juk (his word for a lame-brained person). The irony? He's currently being interviewed for a podcast. Kareem catches him in the contradiction, but the guy doesn't flinch. He's happy to participate in this one specifically so he can tell all those other "juks out here running around thinking there's somebody important" exactly what he thinks of them. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yoicee9Vn7I https://www.youtube.com/embed/yoicee9Vn7I 61 2024-08-10T12:33:05.000Z 302959 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/donald-trump-and-kamala-harris-donald-trump 2026-04-15T07:29:57.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/K900yOPlG9s/maxresdefault.jpg Donald Trump A straphanger argues that Donald Trump getting voted out was "the worst thing that could have happened to America" because now white supremacy has gone "lowkey." Kareem listens as the passenger explains his unusual theory: unhinged white men in office at least keep people activated, while under Biden everyone's just going to brunch. The conversation spirals into questions about what canceled celebrities are doing now. Kevin Spacey, Kanye West. Are they in basements with kids or hanging with Nazis? When Kareem points out Kanye is Black, the passenger concedes he's "white in some ways" and compares him to Nutella. It's provocative political commentary that refuses easy categorization. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=K900yOPlG9s https://www.youtube.com/embed/K900yOPlG9s 61 2024-08-09T23:28:03.000Z 689559 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/bring-it-back-to-the-old-new-york-f-these-bike-lanes 2026-04-15T07:30:02.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/8z6-KgmgFuk/maxresdefault.jpg Bring It Back to the Old New York! F*** These Bike Lanes Bring it back to the old New York. That's the battle cry from an anonymous rider who wants to tear out the bike lanes, ignore pedestrian signals, and restore what he sees as the city's authentic chaos. Kareem listens as the guy explains how real New Yorkers don't wait for "Don't Walk" signs because "common sense tells you to" just look both ways. The rant spirals into a manifesto about breaking rules: hop the turnstile, drive solo in HOV lanes, stop being courteous. His philosophy? He loves that everyone else follows the rules because it makes life easier for people like him who don't. It's nostalgia for lawlessness, wrapped in the conviction that Copenhagen-style civility has no place in New York. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8z6-KgmgFuk https://www.youtube.com/embed/8z6-KgmgFuk 61 2024-08-03T13:32:35.000Z 1675467 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/taylor-swift-is-not-one-of-the-greatest-of-all-time-sorry 2026-04-15T07:30:08.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/FymuUZfVtFs/maxresdefault.jpg Taylor Swift is Not One of the Greatest of All Time. Sorry A stranger passionately defends Taylor Swift as "the Bob Dylan of young women," sparking a heated debate with Kareem about whether she belongs among the greatest lyricists of all time. She argues that Swift has uniquely chronicled the experience of growing up female, from age 12 to womanhood, and points to the prophetic line "your enemies will defeat themselves before you have a chance to swing" as evidence of her artistry. Kareem pushes back hard. He questions whether "Shake It Off" was a mistake and challenges the idea that Swift and Eminem can occupy the same category. The defender insists Swift's mainstream singles don't represent her true genius, which lives in the deep cuts of her discography, and that the media unfairly reduced her to just breakup songs. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FymuUZfVtFs https://www.youtube.com/embed/FymuUZfVtFs 61 2024-08-01T17:42:12.000Z 96954 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/eric-adams-is-a-terrible-nyc-mayor 2026-04-15T07:30:13.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/_Epax-mn93A/maxresdefault.jpg Eric Adams is a Terrible NYC Mayor A straphanger comes in hot with a detailed indictment of Mayor Eric Adams's record on cost of living. The anonymous rider rattles off specifics: a 9% rent increase for two million New Yorkers in rent-stabilized units, a $70 monthly spike in ConEd bills that Adams signed off on, and water bills up $9 to their highest point in 14 years. Kareem agrees with the assessment. The rider's not mincing words about 2025: "Say goodbye to your second term because you should not be running New York City." It's a focused rant that treats the mayor's policy decisions as pocketbook issues, not abstract politics. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_Epax-mn93A https://www.youtube.com/embed/_Epax-mn93A 58 2024-07-31T14:59:42.000Z 1747444 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/abolish-dating-apps 2026-04-15T07:30:17.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/XaS8bpcPoIc/maxresdefault.jpg Abolish Dating Apps Dating apps need to be "void and null and just abolished," according to a rider who's convinced modern romance has hit rock bottom. She tells Kareem that while the apps were fun at first, now people are just swiping without actually talking to each other. The irony? Every single person she's dated has been from an app. But clearly it's not working, she argues, pointing to studies showing people are more single and having way less sex than before. Her solution is simple: ditch the apps, go back to real life, and "everyone needs to just up their rizz." Less incels, more actual human connection. When Kareem asks if she has a boyfriend, the answer is no, and she quickly shuts down his suggestion that people hit her DMs. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XaS8bpcPoIc https://www.youtube.com/embed/XaS8bpcPoIc 60 2024-07-30T16:10:21.000Z 96753 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/taylor-swift-why-is-taylor-swift-the-chose-one 2026-04-15T07:30:22.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/RdMky-mCXY8/maxresdefault.jpg Why is Taylor Swift the Chose One? Why is Taylor Swift the chosen one? Kareem poses this pointed question to a Swiftie on the subway, comparing her elevated status to Kacey Musgraves and Olivia Rodrigo. The fan credits Swift's "mind-blowing" discography and sheer output volume, calling her an excellent businesswoman. But Kareem pushes back. Can art really be authentic when it's just churning out profits? The tension between commercial success and genuine artistry hangs in the air as the interview wraps, leaving the Swiftie defending her idol's massive cultural empire against skepticism about what it all means. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RdMky-mCXY8 https://www.youtube.com/embed/RdMky-mCXY8 45 2024-07-30T00:13:27.000Z 81415 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/this-guy-thinks-we-need-more-entertainment-on-the-subway 2026-04-15T07:30:25.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/Lb_bjhaBDaY/maxresdefault.jpg This Guy Thinks We Need More Entertainment on the Subway A passionate New Yorker wants to transform the subway into a full-blown carnival, complete with comedians, vendors, popcorn, and cotton candy. He tells Kareem he's ready for apples, marshmallows, and entertainment around the clock. When his sister calls at 2:00 in the morning worried about him taking the train, he brushes it off: "I'm among friends. I'm a New Yorker, baby." The subway isn't just transportation for him. It's a stage waiting to happen, and he's clearly enjoying every minute of it. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Lb_bjhaBDaY https://www.youtube.com/embed/Lb_bjhaBDaY 58 2024-07-29T18:59:25.000Z 123426 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/taylor-swift-is-jeff-bezos-for-girls 2026-04-15T07:30:30.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/fsGwuH0oziY/maxresdefault.jpg Taylor Swift is Jeff Bezos for girls A Swiftie makes the bold claim that "Taylor Swift is Jeff Bezos for girls," arguing the pop star shares the same relentless work ethic and drive for constant self-improvement as the tech billionaire. They point to Kobe Bryant as proof, citing an interview where the basketball legend said he looked to Swift for inspiration because of her "level of output and determination and artistry that's very hard to master." Kobe was up at 4 a.m. practicing. Taylor keeps one-upping herself. Kareem pushes back on the Bezos comparison, but the fan doubles down on the idea that Swift embodies that same unstoppable, empire-building energy. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fsGwuH0oziY https://www.youtube.com/embed/fsGwuH0oziY 61 2024-07-27T16:44:23.000Z 51641 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/halsey-tragedy-makes-people-funny 2026-04-15T07:30:36.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/r6tqd5HdyPM/maxresdefault.jpg Tragedy makes people funny Halsey drops two memorable takes on Kareem's subway set: tragedy breeds comedy, and "the asshole is the window to the soul." The pop star opens up about getting seriously sick two years ago, an experience that shifted her entire perspective and gave her a darker sense of humor. She used to take herself really seriously. Not anymore. The conversation quickly spirals into hilariously unhinged territory when Halsey argues that doggy style is just as intimate as missionary, because you're literally staring at someone's "third eye." Kareem enthusiastically agrees, claiming his third eye stays wide open at all times. It's the kind of chaotic energy that makes SubwayTakes work. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=r6tqd5HdyPM https://www.youtube.com/embed/r6tqd5HdyPM 60 2024-07-26T20:03:54.000Z 81648 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/halsey-on-people-hittin-it-from-the-back 2026-04-15T07:30:41.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/EscZdoYiwFw/maxresdefault.jpg Halsey on people hittin’ it from the back Halsey and Kareem have a surprisingly philosophical conversation about sexual positions on the subway. The pop star argues that hitting it from the back isn't less personal than missionary, insisting "the ass is the window to the soul." They both agree. Kareem checks in on her third eye. Halsey claims hers is wide open, though she clarifies it's illegal on the subway. The brief exchange manages to be both absurd and weirdly sincere, with Halsey fully committing to the bit about everyone knowing the connection between asses and souls. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EscZdoYiwFw https://www.youtube.com/embed/EscZdoYiwFw 28 2024-07-26T16:16:43.000Z 47837 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/taylor-swift-dear-swifties 2026-04-15T07:30:46.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/JXv4YQMN1bw/maxresdefault.jpg Dear Swifties A stranger on the subway needs to address the Swifties directly. Looking straight at the camera, they issue a preemptive plea: "Don't come after us. We're just people." The message is blunt and necessary. Not everyone loves Taylor Swift, not everyone cares about Taylor Swift, and that's a fact her fans need to accept. The speaker reminds viewers that real human beings exist beyond stan culture, that loving other people in your actual life matters more than parasocial devotion to a pop star. It's a rare moment of someone pushing back against fandom intensity before it starts. Kareem lets the whole thing unfold. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JXv4YQMN1bw https://www.youtube.com/embed/JXv4YQMN1bw 38 2024-07-26T03:25:46.000Z 49511 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/taylor-swift-is-mid 2026-04-15T07:30:52.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/pj918OXyXgY/maxresdefault.jpg Taylor Swift is mid A straphanger makes a plea directly to camera before discussing Taylor Swift's fanbase: "We are human beings. We love other people." The conversation turns to the Swifties and their documented history of doxxing and threatening critics of the pop star. Kareem raises the question of whether Swift herself bears responsibility for her fans' behavior. She's said nothing. The discussion touches on the intensity of Swift's following and the real-world consequences faced by those who dare criticize her. The straphanger issues a preemptive warning, acknowledging that people are entitled to their opinions about Taylor Swift without facing harassment. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pj918OXyXgY https://www.youtube.com/embed/pj918OXyXgY 61 2024-07-25T22:40:14.000Z 36852 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/taylor-swift-is-taylor-swift-a-lyrical-genius-or-is-she-just-mid 2026-04-15T07:31:02.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/MoILMxQLCgQ/maxresdefault.jpg Is Taylor Swift a lyrical genius or is she just mid? Mary Neely starts with a warning to the Swifties: "We're just people." Her viral SubwayTakes claim that Taylor Swift is one of the greatest lyricists of all time brings pop critic Jon Caramanica, comedian Yedoye Travis, and cultural commentator Neoliberal Hell into Kareem's orbit for a full-length debate. Neely argues Swift's deep cuts reveal genius, that she's captured growing up female like no other artist. Travis isn't buying it. He'd rather talk Beyoncé. Caramanica remembers hearing "Tim McGraw" in 2008 and immediately knowing Swift would dominate country music. The conversation veers from whether relatability even matters in pop to why dismissing her might be ungenerous. Kareem's monologue compares her to "Bob Dylan for girls," though he admits preferring Bob Dylan for boys because he is, in fact, a boy. The panel never quite settles whether Swift's a lyrical genius or just mid, but they certainly try. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MoILMxQLCgQ https://www.youtube.com/embed/MoILMxQLCgQ 1569 2024-07-25T12:25:20.000Z 45150 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/i-wish-guys-could-be-bisexual-the-same-way-women-are 2026-04-15T07:31:06.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/U3QHvU_s79c/maxresdefault.jpg “I wish guys could be bisexual the same way women are” A stranger brings a wild proposition to Kareem: he wishes guys could claim they're bisexual without needing proof the way women can. The logic? Tell your buddies you're bi and they'll immediately demand evidence. "You go to your buddies right now and you're like, 'Hey, man, I'm bisexual.' He go, 'Yeah, pal, I haven't seen you suck one.'" Kareem's genuinely confused. The rider insists there's a proving ground for male sexuality that doesn't exist for women, though he clarifies he's actually straight. When Kareem mentions his own accepting friends don't require proof, the stranger has a theory: maybe they're gay. The conversation spirals beautifully into nonsense before the rider bails. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=U3QHvU_s79c https://www.youtube.com/embed/U3QHvU_s79c 61 2024-07-24T16:25:48.000Z 3415595 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/they-wanna-keep-us-hot-and-poor 2026-04-15T07:31:11.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/XlhDLl93QF4/maxresdefault.jpg They Wanna Keep Us Hot and Poor Designer clothes want to keep us "hot and poor," according to a straphanger who recently quit her fashion habit. Just last month, actually. Kareem hears her confession: all those years blowing money on accessories, shoes, and jewelry meant missing out on other purchases. Like what? A Vitamix. She can make smoothies every day now. Kareem can't help but point out she's still name-dropping brands, and she admits she's brainwashed too. The conversation turns unexpectedly therapeutic as they discuss her month-old recovery from designer addiction, with Kareem slipping into therapist mode for what he declares the show's first therapy episode. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XlhDLl93QF4 https://www.youtube.com/embed/XlhDLl93QF4 51 2024-07-23T14:48:27.000Z 67446 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/people-who-spell-crazy-with-a-k-aint-really-that-krazy-at 2026-04-15T07:31:15.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/qLTYUqFBoFw/maxresdefault.jpg People Who Spell “crazy” with a “k” Ain’t Really That “krazy” at A straphanger delivers a hot take about performative edginess: people who spell "crazy" with a K aren't actually that krazy. Kareem agrees, but suggests spelling it with an X would truly be demented. The conversation takes a wild turn when the rider claims the craziest thing he's ever done was running for president in 1972. The catch? He wasn't alive yet, which made him ineligible for office. That's crazy. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qLTYUqFBoFw https://www.youtube.com/embed/qLTYUqFBoFw 59 2024-07-22T14:27:24.000Z 1441768 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/theres-no-such-thing-as-being-too-busy 2026-04-15T07:31:20.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/LQ-CZdut3VQ/maxresdefault.jpg There’s no such thing as being “too busy”… I don't believe being too busy is a thing," declares a stranger who stops to debate Kareem about productivity and excuses. The rider insists that claiming you're too busy is just code for making bad decisions. People choose how they spend their time. Kareem tries to push back, but the conversation spirals into playful bickering about who gets to say "100%" and whether Kareem even gets paid for this. The exchange captures that familiar tension between personal responsibility and genuine overwhelm, all while the two trade jabs about broken hearts and dating excuses in classic subway banter style. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LQ-CZdut3VQ https://www.youtube.com/embed/LQ-CZdut3VQ 61 2024-07-21T15:01:56.000Z 104483 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/girl-its-90-degrees-outside-take-the-fing-cowboy-boots-off 2026-04-15T07:31:24.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/IHbVO7W0qyw/maxresdefault.jpg Girl Its 90 Degrees Outside Take the F***ing Cowboy Boots Off A straphanger has strong opinions about summer fashion choices in 90-degree heat, specifically targeting cowboy boots. He insists women should store them during hot weather, veering into territory about pH balance and sweaty feet that he himself acknowledges might get him canceled again. He's already been deplatformed on Instagram for fighting in the Shade Room comments. The boots have to smell terrible, he argues. Kareem agrees with the take, keeping it simple as the rider apologizes for any offense while standing firm on his anti-summer-cowboy-boot stance. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IHbVO7W0qyw https://www.youtube.com/embed/IHbVO7W0qyw 57 2024-07-18T14:54:54.000Z 300889 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/eli-brown-there-is-only-one-way-to-hang-your-toilet-paperi-strongly-disagree 2026-04-15T07:31:29.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/fJ1HimaXXGg/maxresdefault.jpg There is Only One Way to Hang Your Toilet Paper…i Strongly Disagree Eli Brown has strong opinions about toilet paper orientation, and he's willing to act on them. He insists there's only "one and one way only" to hang it: over the front, never behind. Brown doesn't just preach this philosophy. He practices it. Every time he encounters a backwards roll, he flips it. To him, hanging toilet paper the wrong way points to "a lack of common sense and common decency," comparable to wearing shoes on the wrong foot. Kareem disagrees entirely, leading to a bathroom etiquette standoff that ends with Brown dropping the mic on his adamant pro-front-hanging stance. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fJ1HimaXXGg https://www.youtube.com/embed/fJ1HimaXXGg 59 2024-07-17T17:31:28.000Z 128147 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/mexican-people-and-poc-should-dress-like-white-people-on-st-pattys-day 2026-04-15T07:31:32.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/1oSzHFkGK_Y/maxresdefault.jpg Mexican People and Poc Should Dress Like White People on St. Pattys Day ☘️ A straphanger proposes that Mexican people and people of color should dress like white people on St. Patrick's Day, complete with "full white face" and red beards. The suggestion? Cultural appropriation payback. She argues white people have been wearing sombreros and fake mustaches on Cinco de Mayo for years, and now it's time to flip the script. Her St. Patrick's Day plans include crying in public and asking random Black men if they live in the neighborhood. Kareem's on board with the satirical protest and adds his own demand: white people should hand over their credit card numbers. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1oSzHFkGK_Y https://www.youtube.com/embed/1oSzHFkGK_Y 57 2024-07-16T13:51:20.000Z 2092177 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/this-guy-supports-crime-on-the-subway-lmao 2026-04-15T07:31:37.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/gcNzKzY6jNI/maxresdefault.jpg This Guy Supports Crime On The Subway LMAO A yellow cab driver shocks Kareem with an outrageous economic theory: he supports subway crime because it's "very good for Yellow Cab drivers." The logic is simple and ruthless. When people get scared of the subway, they take cabs instead. When someone gets pushed onto the tracks, trains stop, passengers come up to street level, and he gets a fare. Crime is up under Mayor Adams, and so are cab fares. It's a golden era from his perspective. Somebody's got to win, somebody's got to lose. Kareem can only respond with disbelief, respectfully disagreeing while acknowledging the hustle. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gcNzKzY6jNI https://www.youtube.com/embed/gcNzKzY6jNI 58 2024-07-15T14:22:31.000Z 3606349 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/ivy-wolk-spittin-facts-tho 2026-04-15T07:31:42.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/ylrOhVYzC2A/maxresdefault.jpg Ivy Wolk Spittin Facts Tho Just take it" is the mantra from an anonymous rider who's got zero patience for overthinking. She lays out a philosophy in two parts: literally pocket what's available if nobody's claiming it, and figuratively jump at opportunities instead of standing frozen on the ledge wondering if you deserve them. "Let her cook," she says about seizing the moment. Put your nose to the grindstone and figure it out. Kareem agrees completely, then adds his own hot take: groceries shouldn't cost money. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ylrOhVYzC2A https://www.youtube.com/embed/ylrOhVYzC2A 59 2024-07-14T15:40:58.000Z 565139 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/transgenerational-millenial-identifies-as-boomer 2026-04-15T07:31:46.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/sB6n1oSFKWU/maxresdefault.jpg Transgenerational Millenial Identifies As Boomer A millennial born on the last day of 1984 declares himself transgenerational, identifying as a Boomer despite his age. Kareem tries to reason with the straphanger, pointing out he's technically a millennial, but the rider doubles down with a message for younger folks: "Let's all get to work, you big babies." He argues that Boomers actually put millennials in a position to work harder because life is tough. The conversation gets punchy. The rider tells Kareem his music's too loud in the subway and accuses him of being spoiled. It's a strange case of generational reverse engineering, where someone born in the mid-80s has more in common with the "ok boomer" crowd than his own peers. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sB6n1oSFKWU https://www.youtube.com/embed/sB6n1oSFKWU 46 2024-07-13T18:27:45.000Z 30512 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/boomers-think-its-our-fault-that-were-broke 2026-04-15T07:31:52.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/6F8_rHlmtVc/maxresdefault.jpg Boomers Think It’s OUR Fault That We’re Broke An anonymous rider flips the script on generational wealth complaints, arguing that young people need to actively push out older workers instead of waiting for opportunities to appear. "You have to come and take our jobs," they tell Kareem, using their own position as an art critic for New York Magazine as an example. It's a surprisingly confrontational take. The rider insists the next generation shouldn't be asking for good jobs and real estate but claiming them by forcing the current establishment aside. The conversation challenges the usual narrative about boomers hoarding resources, suggesting younger people bear some responsibility for not being aggressive enough in demanding what they want. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6F8_rHlmtVc https://www.youtube.com/embed/6F8_rHlmtVc 29 2024-07-12T19:30:41.000Z 846733 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/divorce-is-not-that-big-of-a-deal 2026-04-15T07:31:56.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/L3dmmlYpbRU/maxresdefault.jpg Divorce is NOT that big of a deal A stranger on the subway believes everyone should be divorced at least once before 40. Otherwise, she says, you aren't living. The 37-year-old rider compares divorce to breaking a lease in New York City, calling it just a breakup after a party, a legal breakup. Kareem pushes back, insisting divorce is way harder than a regular breakup, but she's unconvinced. The conversation spirals as they debate who's actually qualified to have an opinion on the matter. She ends with a zinger: Kareem keeps coming back to his exes, which means he's not a good guy. That's her real hot take. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=L3dmmlYpbRU https://www.youtube.com/embed/L3dmmlYpbRU 59 2024-07-12T15:24:48.000Z 242773 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/ok-boomer-full-episode-in-related-videos-below 2026-04-15T07:32:01.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/kyEnrOgRAKk/maxresdefault.jpg Ok Boomer! 😂😂 Full Episode in Related Videos Below. A boomer on the train admits maybe it's time to step aside. "I, of course, should no longer be an art critic for New York Magazine," they tell Kareem, half-joking about getting written out of their job by the next generation. But there's a twist. This isn't about resentment. The rider pivots hard, insisting that younger people deserve their shot at good jobs and real estate, the same things boomers wanted when they were starting out poor. "Let them cook," they say. Nobody likes being poor. The generational war gets a surprisingly gracious ceasefire. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kyEnrOgRAKk https://www.youtube.com/embed/kyEnrOgRAKk 47 2024-07-11T20:55:39.000Z 33536 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/omara-pollo-let-the-pope-say-it 2026-04-15T05:14:44.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/c3czBZRAc8w/maxresdefault.jpg Let The Pope Say It A guest shares their hot take that we should "let the Pope say it," though the full context of what exactly the Pope should be saying isn't clear from this brief moment. The take seems to involve giving the Pope more authority or platform on some issue. It's connected to Omar Apollo somehow based on the episode tags, but the guest keeps it pretty vague and mysterious. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=c3czBZRAc8w https://www.youtube.com/embed/c3czBZRAc8w 4 2024-07-10T23:21:01.000Z 79425 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/having-a-dating-roster-isnt-being-a-hoits-community-building 2026-04-15T07:32:05.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/XaSqD6qbDiM/maxresdefault.jpg Having a dating roster isn’t being a ho…it’s community building‼️ A straphanger offers up a spicy reframe: having a dating roster isn't being a hoe, it's community building. She's tried polyamory with up to five people at once and argues that if you can have a network of friends, why not a network of lovers? Kareem points out the logistical nightmare of answering "What are you doing tonight?" five times over. The solution? A team meeting. She's down. Kareem floats the idea of LinkedIn for lovers, and honestly, the concept kind of tracks if you think about relationship management as professional networking but significantly more intimate. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XaSqD6qbDiM https://www.youtube.com/embed/XaSqD6qbDiM 60 2024-07-10T14:44:43.000Z 53814 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/we-have-a-new-talk-show-on-our-channel 2026-04-15T07:32:09.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/R_koP5cPZz8/maxresdefault.jpg We have a new talk show on our channel Brenda and Jerry can't agree on whether the good old days were actually good. When Kareem asks if they miss simpler times, Jerry's all in, but Brenda pushes back hard. What simpler times? The Bush-Cheney years? Jerry insists 1991 was better when baseball players wore tight pants and you could smoke indoors. Brenda's not buying the nostalgia. The conversation ping-pongs between wistful memories and sharp political reality checks, with Kirby Puckett's uniform somehow becoming the focal point of their generational debate. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=R_koP5cPZz8 https://www.youtube.com/embed/R_koP5cPZz8 61 2024-07-09T16:20:37.000Z 189859 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/baby-boomers-have-ruined-the-worldits-time-for-revenge 2026-04-15T07:32:26.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/Hd8XeO0WO7M/maxresdefault.jpg Baby Boomers have ruined the world.it's time for REVENGE Revenge is in the air, and it's aimed squarely at Baby Boomers. Kareem sits down with comedian Neil, who's got a radical proposal: strip Boomers of their rights the moment they start collecting Social Security. No voting, no running for office, mandatory military service at 65. If they want their rights back, they'll have to compete in "Boomer Squid Games" featuring challenges like taking a dab, chugging a Panera charged lemonade, and passing a culture class. Art critic Jerry Saltz pushes back hard, defending his generation's legacy of civil rights, gay liberation, and Bob Dylan. "Every generation's job is to loathe and resent the generation that comes before it," he argues, before telling Millennials to stop whining and come take Boomer jobs already. The conversation spirals into intergenerational warfare at its pettiest and most hilarious, complete with debates about whether New York was more dangerous in 1979 and why Neil's willing to exempt Dolly Parton but not his own father. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Hd8XeO0WO7M https://www.youtube.com/embed/Hd8XeO0WO7M 1483 2024-07-09T12:00:14.000Z 144698 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/please-for-the-love-of-god-stop-having-bachelorette-parties 2026-04-15T07:32:31.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/Qxuo_uIEDvY/maxresdefault.jpg Please, for the Love of God, Stop Having Bachelorette Parties A woman on the subway has had enough of bachelorette parties, and she's not holding back. Four days, five days, costume changes "like it's the Met Gala," themed days (Euphoria-themed? really?), crowns, sashes, flights to exotic destinations. She's done. Kareem suggests maybe bachelor parties are fine if they're kept to 48 hours, but his conversation partner isn't having it. The real problem isn't gathering with friends. It's gathering with 32 people on a yacht in Majorca. Her diagnosis? "White women are bored." The solution is simple: no more bachelorette parties, no more bachelor parties either. They're both getting canceled. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Qxuo_uIEDvY https://www.youtube.com/embed/Qxuo_uIEDvY 60 2024-07-08T17:55:20.000Z 3903983 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/sean-combs-americans-need-to-understand-the-djinn-because-they-explain-a-lot 2026-04-15T07:32:36.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/J-wrcMpTs7s/maxresdefault.jpg Americans Need to Understand the Djinn Because They Explain a Lot A straphanger explains to Kareem why Americans need to understand the Jinn, supernatural beings made from smokeless fire who possess free will. "Like vapes," the guest clarifies. The conversation touches on Islamic theology (God created angels from light, humans from clay, and Jinn from fire), then careens into why America's obsessed with ghost hunting shows, including one about a Gay Ghost Hunter searching for gay ghosts. They debate Robin Williams versus Will Smith as the Aladdin Genie. Williams wins easily. The guest argues that Jinn explain the "schizophrenic nature of the culture" and its supernatural fixations, before the conversation takes a sharp turn toward Diddy jokes that get bleeped out. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=J-wrcMpTs7s https://www.youtube.com/embed/J-wrcMpTs7s 55 2024-07-07T17:18:23.000Z 126566 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/its-okay-to-have-bad-taste 2026-04-15T07:32:41.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/6c4ohiOJoAI/maxresdefault.jpg It’s Okay To Have Bad Taste A straphanger declares herself a "doctor of taste" after insisting it's perfectly fine to have bad taste. Kareem pushes back. What about bad taste in men? That's different, she says. That's a therapist issue, something only you can fix from within. The conversation bounces between style choices and romantic decisions, treating aesthetic preferences as harmless fun while relationship patterns require deeper work. She's confident about the distinction, even if she can't quite remember which side the heart's on. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6c4ohiOJoAI https://www.youtube.com/embed/6c4ohiOJoAI 20 2024-07-06T14:30:56.000Z 63844 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/the-government-should-pay-for-everyones-parents-to-go-to-therapy 2026-04-15T07:32:46.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/zr1QPSdAkQ4/maxresdefault.jpg The Government Should Pay for Everyone’s Parents to Go to Therapy A straphanger pitches a bold policy idea: the government should pay for everyone's parents to go to therapy. Her reasoning? If her dad had just one session, he'd stop calling her and treating her like a therapist. Kareem pushes back, thinking she wants parents to get better for their own sake, but no, she just wants to stop being their emotional dumping ground. The conversation spirals into whether all fathers are inherently bad, with Kareem challenging her to name five good dads. She responds with "James Baldwin" and "Maya Angelou," prompting Kareem to ask if she's naming dads or just Black people. The bit escalates further when she's asked to name five Asian people and offers "from Parasite." It's absurd, self-aware, and cuts right to the heart of millennial therapy culture. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zr1QPSdAkQ4 https://www.youtube.com/embed/zr1QPSdAkQ4 60 2024-07-05T18:27:07.000Z 283752 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/giving-a-house-tour-online-is-a-great-way-to-get-robbed 2026-04-15T07:32:50.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/ExUceEhJVVg/maxresdefault.jpg Giving A House Tour Online Is A GREAT Way To Get Robbed House tour content is a robbery invitation, according to a straphanger who's clearly thought this through. She cites The Bling Ring as proof nobody learned their lesson. Kareem agrees, though he carves out one exception: Lenny Kravitz's Architectural Digest tour works because "he has cowboys" protecting his Brazil ranch. No one's robbing a man with cowboys. The rider watches house tours but refuses to post her own, partly for security and partly because people would judge what's inside. West Village girlies lack such protection. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ExUceEhJVVg https://www.youtube.com/embed/ExUceEhJVVg 60 2024-07-03T13:14:39.000Z 258732 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/all-women-are-more-attractive-with-armpit-hair-agree-or-disagree 2026-04-15T07:32:55.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/K7-Hp-8D8wg/maxresdefault.jpg All women are more attractive WITH armpit hair! Agree or disagree? A straphanger faces Kareem's provocative question about whether all women are more attractive with armpit hair. His answer? A contradictory mess. He starts with "100% disagree," then immediately pivots to say we need to embrace it or we're falling victim to capitalism and colonialism. Kareem sees through the performance. The guy admits his mom will be disgusted, but doubles down anyway, claiming armpit hair "makes everyone look hotter" and joking that it gives an indication of what's going on down below. By the end, he's inviting women who "look like a Chewbacca" to slide into his DMs. It's classic subway chaos: a man talking himself in circles while trying to sound progressive. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=K7-Hp-8D8wg https://www.youtube.com/embed/K7-Hp-8D8wg 60 2024-07-02T15:45:55.000Z 43971 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/this-woman-thinks-that-instagram-is-the-best-dating-app-in-the-world 2026-04-15T07:33:00.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/i8-AZDJhmjI/maxresdefault.jpg This Woman Thinks That Instagram is the Best Dating App in the World A woman on the train declares Instagram is "the only dating app" and lays out her vision for making it official. She wants everyone to list their height in their bio and use a cryptic triangle symbol to show relationship status. An empty triangle means you're ready to be filled. Kareem pushes back on her 5'11" height requirement, but she's unapologetic about wanting to feel small next to a partner. Is that shallow? Not if you call it a fetish, she argues, comparing it to foot people who operate in plain sight. The conversation takes a turn when she reveals she actually has a WikiFeet page. Kareem's interest is piqued, but she refuses to show her feet on camera. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=i8-AZDJhmjI https://www.youtube.com/embed/i8-AZDJhmjI 61 2024-07-01T17:11:31.000Z 52286 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/he-thinks-we-need-to-bring-back-catcalling 2026-04-15T07:33:04.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/42r8U2prnIk/maxresdefault.jpg He Thinks We Need To Bring Back Catcalling‼️ A straphanger makes his pitch for reimagining catcalling as wholesome street affirmations. Out with the crude stuff. In with uplifting phrases like "May your next years be your best years." Kareem tests the theory, asking what the rider would say to him on the street. The response? "Yo, good here day. You like a bacon neeg of cheese in the morning." It's meant as a compliment, apparently. The conversation's a wild blend of genuine positivity and garbled execution, but the enthusiasm is undeniable. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=42r8U2prnIk https://www.youtube.com/embed/42r8U2prnIk 52 2024-06-28T16:29:16.000Z 44438 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/omara-pollo-it-turns-out-some-people-actually-like-small-talk-omarapollo 2026-04-15T07:33:08.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/HufNSHjBZ-I/maxresdefault.jpg It Turns Out Some People Actually Like Small Talk @omarapollo Omar Apollo makes an unexpected case for bringing back small talk, arguing that we don't need to "offer so much of yourself all the time." He's tired of deep conversations. Kareem initially resists, admitting he prefers zero talk and actively avoids saying hi to people in parks. But the two bond over their shared hatred of "what's new" and the pressure to have something interesting to report. The conversation spirals into a surprisingly long meditation on how small is small and whether nodding counts as acceptable human interaction. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HufNSHjBZ-I https://www.youtube.com/embed/HufNSHjBZ-I 60 2024-06-27T16:26:43.000Z 355440 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/all-pizza-places-must-be-required-to-serve-pizza-by-the-slice-do-you-agree 2026-04-15T07:33:13.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/NQYrDIh5Zo4/maxresdefault.jpg All Pizza Places Must Be Required to Serve Pizza by the Slice! Do You Agree? A pizza purist has strong words for establishments that only serve whole pies: get out of New York. This rider's frustration stems from checking out the city's top 50 pizza lists and noticing fancy spots creeping in that won't sell you a slice, won't stay open past 11:00, and force you to sit down with friends and family instead of eating solo while walking. The audacity. You should be able to grab pizza at 2:00 in the morning, no questions asked. Kareem asks about their favorite slice. Joe's Pizza, naturally. Then comes the twist: they personally don't eat slices at all, only full pizzas, and their go-to is Domino's, which doesn't even offer slices. The irony is perfect. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NQYrDIh5Zo4 https://www.youtube.com/embed/NQYrDIh5Zo4 60 2024-06-25T15:56:28.000Z 770977 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/this-guy-thinks-that-all-men-should-pee-sitting-down-agree-or-disagree 2026-04-15T07:33:18.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/RCETui9mT3k/maxresdefault.jpg This Guy Thinks That All Men Should Pee Sitting Down! Agree or Disagree? A straphanger defends his controversial position that all men should pee sitting down, sparking immediate pushback from Kareem. The stranger insists bathrooms would be cleaner and claims it's "way more soothing" compared to rushing through the day. He argues men won't get pee on their hands or floors. The real shock? His belief that sitting means you don't need to wash your hands afterward. Kareem's baffled response captures the absurdity perfectly as the conversation spirals into debates about women's bathroom cleanliness, UTIs, and whether there's anything to wipe in the first place. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RCETui9mT3k https://www.youtube.com/embed/RCETui9mT3k 60 2024-06-24T15:47:20.000Z 2232320 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/everybody-in-new-york-has-rich-parents-or-is-selling-drugs-agree-or-disagree 2026-04-15T07:33:24.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/xFbAjbx1sec/maxresdefault.jpg Everybody in New York has rich parents or is selling drugs 😂😂😂 Agree or disagree? Everybody does have rich parents. It is a proven fact," a rider tells Kareem, breaking down the economics of surviving in New York City. His take? You're either trust-fund backed or dealing drugs, because working one job can't cover the $4,200 average rent for a one-bedroom. He calls out the "starving artists" in Bushwick whose dads are secretly CEOs of defense contractors, roasts friends who nickle-and-dime on Ubers after buying rounds of drinks, and insists even the corner delis are selling sandwiches and shrooms just to make rent. Moving green? That's lower middle class. You need the white stuff. He's so broke he hopped the turnstile to save $3. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xFbAjbx1sec https://www.youtube.com/embed/xFbAjbx1sec 61 2024-06-20T13:47:23.000Z 11376409 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/incels-are-not-real-does-she-have-a-point 2026-04-15T07:33:29.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/4YCCQe21kVs/maxresdefault.jpg Incels Are Not Real. Does She Have a Point? A stranger on the subway has a bold declaration: incels aren't real. She argues that men who identify as involuntarily celibate aren't actually held back by being nerdy or ugly. They just hate women and feel entitled to their bodies. Her advice? Stop fishing on dry land. Women are conditioned from birth to be desirable to men through Sephora, Victoria's Secret, and European Wax Center, so guys need to put in some effort too. Her prescription is simple: carry a baguette and a book, wear a beret, ask one question like "what's your favorite color?" and you're golden. She's convinced incels have created their own problem by refusing to offer anything women actually want. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4YCCQe21kVs https://www.youtube.com/embed/4YCCQe21kVs 58 2024-05-09T18:00:03.000Z 155201 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/the-only-way-to-move-ahead-in-life-today-agree-or-disagree 2026-04-15T07:33:34.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/8H9Sj4TBWHA/maxresdefault.jpg The Only Way to Move Ahead in Life Today? Agree or Disagree? A straphanger lays out a blunt theory about social mobility in the modern age: if you're hot, you can leapfrog from dirt poor to the upper classes through platforms like OnlyFans and Instagram. No need to go to LA and show your tits in Playboy anymore. Just grab an iPhone. Kareem presses on the obvious follow-up: what about ugly people? The answer comes without hesitation. Lie, cheat and steal. It's a cynical take on beauty privilege that cuts through the usual meritocracy myths, delivered with the kind of casual nihilism that only a random subway conversation can produce. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8H9Sj4TBWHA https://www.youtube.com/embed/8H9Sj4TBWHA 38 2024-05-03T18:00:03.000Z 41576 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/the-best-food-is-the-cheapest-food 2026-04-15T07:33:39.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/giOM6LLBbGU/maxresdefault.jpg The Best Food is the Cheapest Food Ethnic food tastes better the cheaper it gets." That's the bold opener from a rider who schools Kareem on what makes authentic food actually authentic. In Egypt, falafel costs a dollar. Here, five's okay. But twenty bucks? Disgusting. The difference between a $5 falafel and a $20 one? The fonts. This straphanger wants Algerian music playing in the background, zero eye contact, and absolutely no nice menus. His formula is simple: if the spot has slick branding, the food is trash. Give him six-dollar momos and cheap chicken adobo over anything Instagram-worthy. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=giOM6LLBbGU https://www.youtube.com/embed/giOM6LLBbGU 39 2024-05-01T17:58:32.000Z 48927 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/no-more-djs-we-need-plumbers 2026-04-15T07:33:44.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/4Wv4y1RHzuI/maxresdefault.jpg No More DJ'S! We Need Plumbers A straphanger has had enough of DJs. All of them. Even the vinyl ones. "You're just putting a piece of plastic on a thing," they tell Kareem, dismissing the entire profession with a wave. What does society actually need? Plumbers, electricians, mathematicians, teachers. People who can rip carpet out of a floor and install shelves to help their girlfriend. The rant is absolute: "We do not need more DJs." Kareem agrees completely, nodding along as his conversation partner makes the case that practical skills have been abandoned in favor of turntables and laptop performances that don't actually contribute anything real to the world. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4Wv4y1RHzuI https://www.youtube.com/embed/4Wv4y1RHzuI 35 2024-04-28T18:36:14.000Z 1394707 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/keep-it-to-yourself-gatekeep-more 2026-04-15T07:33:48.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/QwrXERAfjEQ/maxresdefault.jpg Keep It to Yourself! Gatekeep More A straphanger makes a passionate plea for collective secrecy. Stop sharing your favorite spots online. Keep discoveries to "two friends max, maybe one immediate family member." The logic is simple: everything good that gets posted immediately gets ruined, either selling out completely or getting bought by a private equity group that dilutes quality and jacks up prices. Kareem agrees. The rider's philosophy extends to books, films, restaurants, basically anything worth experiencing. Guard it fiercely. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QwrXERAfjEQ https://www.youtube.com/embed/QwrXERAfjEQ 40 2024-04-24T17:49:09.000Z 44228 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/there-should-be-an-entrance-exam-required-to-use-social-media 2026-04-15T07:33:53.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/juA6Wy8XHA0/maxresdefault.jpg There should be an entrance exam required to use social media A rider thinks social media should require an entrance exam, complete with spelling tests and reading comprehension. Kareem pushes back. What would the test even look like? The rider suggests basic literacy checks and critical thinking skills, especially after getting bombarded this week by twelve-year-olds who spelled "you're" as Y R while calling him a horrible dad. He insists his kids aren't actually on social media, just YouTube. Ignorant adults are more dangerous than savvy kids, he argues. But Kareem admits he needs the stupid people online. That's his audience. The rider concedes the point with a joke: if they banned idiots from the internet, only the two of them would be left. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=juA6Wy8XHA0 https://www.youtube.com/embed/juA6Wy8XHA0 58 2024-04-22T21:11:05.000Z 35553 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/make-milk-great-again 2026-04-15T07:33:59.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/iHw-xS9af-Q/maxresdefault.jpg Make Milk Great Again! 🥛 A straphanger has bold ideas about reviving whole milk's reputation, and they're not all legal. Kareem listens as the rider proposes everything from celebrity endorsements to, well, kidnapping. "We need Dua Lipa to drink whole milk and put it on her Instagram," they suggest. That'd be hot, apparently. The conversation spirals into a theory about why missing kids appeared on milk cartons: because you need whole milk's energy to actually find them. It's absurd. It's earnest. Michael Jordan's iconic milk mustache comes up as proof that plant-based alternatives can't compete with dairy's star power. The rider insists whole milk just needs better marketing, though their brainstorming methods veer into increasingly chaotic territory. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iHw-xS9af-Q https://www.youtube.com/embed/iHw-xS9af-Q 41 2024-04-18T19:57:33.000Z 41578 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/actors-need-to-gain-more-weight-for-roles 2026-04-15T07:34:04.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/1rSI7U4-17U/maxresdefault.jpg Actors need to gain more weight for roles A straphanger has strong opinions about method acting and body transformation. Kareem hears her case: actors playing larger characters need to actually gain weight for their roles, not fake it with prosthetics or avoid it entirely. She calls out Amanda Peet in the Betty Broderick movie, who spent scenes "just chewing food, the whole movie" without gaining a pound. The logic gets wonderfully specific. How can we see ourselves in characters overcoming obstacles if they aren't struggling with late night snacking? All villains need that struggle. She's not impressed by Brendan Fraser's bodysuit in The Whale either. That's cheating, and he had enough time. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1rSI7U4-17U https://www.youtube.com/embed/1rSI7U4-17U 57 2024-04-17T17:46:54.000Z 35516 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/this-is-the-most-beautiful-place-in-the-world 2026-04-15T07:34:08.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/_TcsvlcwJjI/maxresdefault.jpg This is the Most Beautiful Place in the World A subway rider shares an unexpectedly passionate love for Marriott Hotel basement pools, calling them "the most peaceful and beautiful place in the world." He's visited about 30 of them while on tour and prefers them to any boutique hotel. The atmosphere is what gets him: church-like reverb mixed with a bad smell, creating something between a monastery and a bathhouse. He describes screaming, piss everywhere, bubble beards. Kareem learns the devotion runs deep. The guy's had intercourse in one of these highly chlorinated pools. No fear whatsoever. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_TcsvlcwJjI https://www.youtube.com/embed/_TcsvlcwJjI 57 2024-04-14T18:16:21.000Z 35876 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/you-should-wash-your-hands-before-you-peenot-after 2026-04-15T07:34:13.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/BQwnRbpBnwQ/maxresdefault.jpg You should wash your hands BEFORE you pee…not after A straphanger makes a bold hygiene argument: you should wash your hands before you pee, not after. The logic? Your hands touch subway poles and germy surfaces all day, but your penis stays clean and isolated in your pants. Why bring the dirty outside world to your most precious organ? Kareem seems skeptical at first, but the rider's passionate defense wins him over. "Would you lick your hand after doing this?" the stranger asks, gesturing to a subway pole. The case is compelling. Your genitals are protected. Your hands are not. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BQwnRbpBnwQ https://www.youtube.com/embed/BQwnRbpBnwQ 52 2024-04-10T18:18:35.000Z 38273 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/hillary-clinton-is-an-american-hero-agree-or-disagree 2026-04-15T07:34:18.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/9PLZiA-HzSM/maxresdefault.jpg Hillary Clinton is an American hero. Agree or disagree? A straphanger drops a surprising Hillary Clinton take that goes off the rails fast. He calls her an American hero, then immediately backtracks to "100% disagree." His reasoning? She stayed with Bill after the Lewinsky scandal, making her a "pretty cool wife." He compares this to his own divorce after getting a "blow up at work." Things get weirder when he praises Clinton for almost being "the first email president" because of her email controversy, completely missing the point of why people were upset. Kareem tries to steer the conversation, but the confusion is already peak subway energy. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9PLZiA-HzSM https://www.youtube.com/embed/9PLZiA-HzSM 51 2024-04-08T18:47:42.000Z 42067 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/every-guy-wants-the-candid-girlfriend-is-she-right-though 2026-04-15T07:34:22.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/4-Jjt17wp9o/maxresdefault.jpg Every Guy Wants "the Candid Girlfriend". is She Right Though? A straphanger delivers a sharp diagnosis of what men *actually* want in New York dating. Forget the cool artsy baddy with baby bangs and daddy issues. The real winner? The "candid girlfriend," a 5'5" and a half woman from New Hampshire with mousy brown hair, probably studied art history, whose entire personality revolves around loving pomegranate. Her boyfriend finds this quirky and adorable. She's never the center of attention, but she's always featured in those #35mm film photos he posts on Instagram. Kareem agrees. The take rings true with an uncomfortable specificity that'll make half the city check their partner's camera roll. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4-Jjt17wp9o https://www.youtube.com/embed/4-Jjt17wp9o 40 2024-04-05T18:03:57.000Z 3223387 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/this-is-why-strip-clubs-are-gay 2026-04-15T07:34:28.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/YQk_G9f4KlE/maxresdefault.jpg This is why Strip clubs are gay A straphanger has a bold theory: strip clubs are gay regardless of who's performing. His reasoning? Straight strip clubs are "a diva performance" where men get so worked up they'll hook up with each other afterward. He claims he's done exactly that, meeting guys at straight clubs who were "so horny" they crossed lines. Kareem agrees it's weird when dudes do horny things together, recalling high school friends who'd watch porn as a group or stand around a fan with their dicks out. Strip clubs blur boundaries. The anonymous rider hasn't been to one in three years, but his take sticks: any room full of aroused men has a certain energy, no matter what's happening on stage. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YQk_G9f4KlE https://www.youtube.com/embed/YQk_G9f4KlE 59 2024-04-04T17:41:53.000Z 76854 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/we-should-all-just-eat-bugs 2026-04-15T07:34:33.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/8gQBux7H0SI/maxresdefault.jpg We Should All Just Eat Bugs? A subway rider wants you to eat bugs. Crickets, specifically. His pitch? They're good for the environment because they're cold-blooded, so unlike cows that burn most of their food heating their bodies, you can just "put them in a drawer" with some food and you've got dinner. Kareem is incredulous. "Are you a lizard, bro?" The stranger insists most of the world already eats bugs, which doesn't make Kareem any more sold on the idea. It's a bizarre environmental argument that lands somewhere between earnest and completely unhinged. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8gQBux7H0SI https://www.youtube.com/embed/8gQBux7H0SI 42 2024-04-02T18:16:25.000Z 25868 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/its-okay-to-be-a-little-racist-agree-or-disagree 2026-04-15T07:34:38.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/eWiboAwwjlc/maxresdefault.jpg It’s okay to be a little racist? Agree or disagree? A straphanger drops a controversial take: it's okay to be "a little bit racist." Kareem immediately pushes back with "100% disagree, bro," but the rider insists every American has at least some racism in them. The conversation gets awkward fast. When Kareem asks what qualifies as 5% racist, wondering if mentioning chicken crosses the line, the guy suggests something far worse: dropping the N-word "in the shower when no one's around." Even with an offered pass, Kareem refuses. The whole exchange captures how casual bigotry gets rationalized as somehow acceptable in small doses, with the rider treating prejudice like a percentage you can budget. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eWiboAwwjlc https://www.youtube.com/embed/eWiboAwwjlc 49 2024-03-30T19:12:22.000Z 62572 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/all-pasta-is-tasteless 2026-04-15T07:34:42.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/VMi5sbjJ8_8/maxresdefault.jpg All Pasta is Tasteless? 🍝 Angel hair pasta sparks an immediate visceral reaction from a rider who wants it "banned" from menus everywhere. She calls it "food for people that don't like food" and claims it tastes like nothing. Kareem pushes back with the obvious counterpoint: all pasta is tasteless without sauce. The debate gets heated until Kareem reveals he's brought her a gift. Plot twist. It's warm angel hair pasta, freshly cooked and ready to prove his point on the subway. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VMi5sbjJ8_8 https://www.youtube.com/embed/VMi5sbjJ8_8 35 2024-03-26T22:09:11.000Z 31406 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/bring-back-whole-milk 2026-04-15T07:34:46.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/y6CL_FY-FEo/maxresdefault.jpg Bring Back Whole Milk 🥛 A straphanger on the subway has a bone to pick with Big Nut. His theory? America's gone soft ever since whole milk fell out of favor, and nut milk companies are to blame for convincing everyone to become "malnourished at a higher price." The guy's 52 and credits his six-foot frame to childhood milk consumption. He points out that milk used to advertise for missing kids while Big Nut only cares about podcasts and an environment they're ironically destroying. The kicker: it takes more water to make nut milk than to feed a cow. Kareem's clearly entertained by this anti-almond crusade, agreeing that Big Nut is evil. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=y6CL_FY-FEo https://www.youtube.com/embed/y6CL_FY-FEo 43 2024-03-24T19:13:43.000Z 34985 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/get-your-size-right 2026-04-15T07:34:51.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/wHj1bxuvP8Q/maxresdefault.jpg Get Your Size Right A woman on the subway delivers urgent advice: every woman should go for a bra fitting. Kareem's confused. What's a bra fitting? She explains that stores like Macy's will measure you for free and tell you your actual size, which most women apparently don't know. They just walk in, ask for a fitting, and shop accordingly. It's straightforward stuff, but Kareem's never heard of anyone doing this. She's adamant. Women everywhere are wearing the wrong size bras, and it's time to fix that. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wHj1bxuvP8Q https://www.youtube.com/embed/wHj1bxuvP8Q 32 2024-03-23T20:00:23.000Z 30664 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/there-is-no-bigger-red-flag-than-a-bad-tipper 2026-04-15T07:34:55.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/0vR2TjjeE8k/maxresdefault.jpg There is No Bigger Red Flag 🚩than a Bad Tipper A straphanger has strong opinions about tipping and what it reveals about someone's character. Bad tippers? Total red flags. She argues there's no way someone who counts their pennies at dinner will be generous in other areas of life, especially the bedroom. When Kareem asks about her biggest tip, she's left 200% before but keeps it simple at 20% for "the kids at home." Other red flags worth mentioning include not talking to your mother, voting for Donald Trump, and weirdly, not snacking between meals. Her conclusion is straightforward: "If you want to get laid, you got to tip well. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0vR2TjjeE8k https://www.youtube.com/embed/0vR2TjjeE8k 44 2024-03-20T20:17:51.000Z 32735 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/bring-it-back-to-the-old-new-york 2026-04-15T07:34:59.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/KCjLcUYZy3U/maxresdefault.jpg Bring It Back to the Old New York A stranger on the subway wants to "bring it back to the old New York" and has strong opinions about what that means. Bike lanes? Get rid of them. Pedestrian safety rules? Trash them. He tells Kareem that real New Yorkers don't wait for walk signs because they actually look both ways and use common sense. His philosophy extends beyond traffic: hop the turnstile once in your life, stop being so cautious, and quit following all the rules. The best part? When everyone else plays it safe, it just makes life easier for people like him who don't. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KCjLcUYZy3U https://www.youtube.com/embed/KCjLcUYZy3U 54 2024-03-17T19:03:24.000Z 25821 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/if-im-going-up-to-order-im-not-tipping 2026-04-15T07:35:04.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/EzRs-N_ClvI/maxresdefault.jpg If I’m going up to order, I’m not tipping A straphanger goes off on tipping culture, and they're not holding back. If they're walking up to order at a counter, they're hitting zero percent on that iPad screen. No exceptions. Their reasoning cuts straight to the point: why should customers subsidize wages when restaurants should just pay people properly? The rant escalates as they imagine a future where tipping hits 45% while customers do all the work themselves. Coffee shops? Zero. One place was so rude they didn't want to even mention the name. Kareem captures the frustration that's been building every time someone rotates that tablet screen your way. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EzRs-N_ClvI https://www.youtube.com/embed/EzRs-N_ClvI 48 2024-03-15T19:44:51.000Z 1153154 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/charli-xcx-says-music-is-not-important 2026-04-15T07:35:08.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/MWvygDle9so/maxresdefault.jpg Charli Xcx Says Music is Not Important⭐️ Music is not important," a rider tells Kareem, immediately disagreeing with herself 100%. She clarifies that artistry matters more than music alone. What she needs from an artist is world building, the entire culture and space they create, not just songs. She name-checks Prince, Lou Reed, and Young Lee as examples of great artists who deliver that total vision. Kareem vibes with her perspective on artistry over music. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MWvygDle9so https://www.youtube.com/embed/MWvygDle9so 39 2024-03-13T19:26:06.000Z 50858 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/stop-correcting-people 2026-04-15T07:35:12.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/JcXiHvEe7-g/maxresdefault.jpg Stop Correcting People ✋🏻 A straphanger shares a passionate plea: stop correcting people's pronunciation. She offers "Antigua" versus "Antigua" as a prime example of the kind of nitpicking that drives her crazy. Why does it matter? Nine times out of ten, you know what somebody's trying to say. Kareem agrees that English is a mess anyway, pointing out the absurdity of silent letters and words like "Arkansas." The spellings are diabolical, evil even. Just let people talk. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JcXiHvEe7-g https://www.youtube.com/embed/JcXiHvEe7-g 36 2024-03-11T20:46:20.000Z 56449 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/men-should-wear-heels 2026-04-15T07:35:16.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/Ge9E_GesSAI/maxresdefault.jpg Men should wear heels 👠 A woman on the subway has a bold proposal: men should reclaim heels as their own. She argues that since men wore them first in the 18th century, they should be "the sole and main wearers" now, framing it as payback for centuries of female suffering. Her logic? "There is not much of women's pain that we can inflict on men," and this is one rare opportunity. She admits she doesn't wear heels herself though. Why? She's already tall, and when she gets taller than men in heels, "they get sad." Kareem listens as she makes her case for a complete gender reversal in footwear norms. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ge9E_GesSAI https://www.youtube.com/embed/Ge9E_GesSAI 33 2024-03-09T19:54:27.000Z 31806 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/taylor-swiftis-the-goat 2026-04-15T07:35:22.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/UtZfgBB5kb0/maxresdefault.jpg Taylor Swift…is the Goat? 😶 A straphanger makes a bold claim: Taylor Swift is "basically the Bob Dylan of young women" and one of the greatest lyricists of all time, arguing no artist has better captured what it's like to grow up female from age twelve onward. Kareem seems intrigued. Then the twist: another rider jumps in with a brutal take, suggesting they should "separate the art from the artist because she's awful and annoying but she makes okay music." The tension is immediate. Two completely opposing views collide in one subway car, turning a Taylor Swift debate into a masterclass in how quickly strangers can go from celebration to roast. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UtZfgBB5kb0 https://www.youtube.com/embed/UtZfgBB5kb0 32 2024-03-08T21:05:52.000Z 11720 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/is-this-how-long-distance-relationships-work 2026-04-15T07:35:28.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/6_w8JrGyDJU/maxresdefault.jpg Is This How Long Distance Relationships Work? 😶 Living in different boroughs? That's long distance. A rider on the subway lays out a hot take that'll resonate with anyone who's ever dated across the 5 train or beyond: if your partner's in another borough, you may as well be living in Paris and New York. Different rules apply. Kareem pushes back on whether "play on player" is really the answer, but the logic holds. Regular couples see each other all the time, but borough-hoppers? They're stuck FaceTiming, planning, dreaming of one day being in an actual relationship. It's not necessarily bad, the rider insists, before admitting it's actually a very bad thing. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6_w8JrGyDJU https://www.youtube.com/embed/6_w8JrGyDJU 28 2024-03-06T19:07:50.000Z 28240 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/should-we-all-just-fart-in-public-agree-or-disagree 2026-04-15T07:35:32.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/3qu8ASwZCA8/maxresdefault.jpg Should We All Just Fart in Public?💨 Agree or Disagree? A straphanger thinks we should all just let it rip whenever nature calls. He's dead serious about normalizing loud public farts, claiming they actually get laughs and make people feel good. His reasoning? Everybody farts anyway, so why pretend otherwise. He tells Kareem he does this constantly at CVS and Chipotle, and insists that farting in public makes you seem tough because people think you don't give a damn. The passenger argues it's a power move that keeps others from messing with you. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3qu8ASwZCA8 https://www.youtube.com/embed/3qu8ASwZCA8 28 2024-03-01T19:48:02.000Z 23113 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/all-bathrooms-should-be-public 2026-04-15T07:35:38.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/8X9L3dCv4Kw/maxresdefault.jpg All Bathrooms Should Be Public 🚽 A straphanger advocates for mandatory public bathrooms in all New York businesses, telling Kareem she faces a monthly crisis of "Am I going to find a bathroom or do I kill myself?" The conversation captures a uniquely New York problem: everywhere else, asking to use a restroom gets you a yes, but here you're told it's out of order. She's experienced this enough to declare it should be illegal. Kareem questions why they're not petitioning the city for more public restrooms instead of putting it on businesses. Her answer? Do both. It's a practical take on urban infrastructure that anyone who's desperately searched for a bathroom in Manhattan immediately understands. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8X9L3dCv4Kw https://www.youtube.com/embed/8X9L3dCv4Kw 37 2024-02-26T19:01:24.000Z 26464 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/dont-listen-to-haters 2026-04-15T07:35:41.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/WiHbkmqeGTI/maxresdefault.jpg DON'T Listen to Haters You can't listen to the last person that whispered in your ear." A rider on the train shares a philosophy of radical self-reliance with Kareem, explaining why she refuses to take compliments or criticisms too seriously. It all boils down to hating unsolicited advice. Whether someone's gassing you up or tearing you down, her response stays the same: thank you and keep it moving. She only listens to herself. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WiHbkmqeGTI https://www.youtube.com/embed/WiHbkmqeGTI 25 2024-02-23T20:21:36.000Z 29674 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/no-more-podcasts 2026-04-15T07:35:45.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/v6VBDGF-fao/maxresdefault.jpg No More Podcasts A straphanger has had enough of the podcast epidemic. No more microphones, no more Amazon starter kits, no more self-important commentary on "food, sports, culture." The rider tells Kareem that everyone who already has a podcast can keep going, but starting a new one should be illegal. It's just people "jerking themselves off on the air," pretending they're doing something meaningful with their lives. The frustration is palpable. Who actually wants to hear what every random person with a foam filter thinks? https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=v6VBDGF-fao https://www.youtube.com/embed/v6VBDGF-fao 26 2024-02-21T20:24:41.000Z 13478 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/hating-the-kardashians-is-sexist 2026-04-15T07:35:51.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/FZIYlaoskPA/maxresdefault.jpg Hating the Kardashians is Sexist? 🤔 A straphanger offers a spicy take: hating the Kardashians might just be sexist. She argues that if the family were all guys just hanging out and working out, people would love the show instead of tearing them down. It's a sharp point. Kareem's clearly caught off guard by the logic. The rider says there's something empowering about how Kim and her sisters have built an empire, calling Kim "an entrepreneur" who's "just capitalizing on the ills of society." Kim's her favorite, naturally. The conversation turns gender dynamics on their head, making you wonder if we judge reality TV differently based on who's starring in it. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FZIYlaoskPA https://www.youtube.com/embed/FZIYlaoskPA 40 2024-02-20T19:03:34.000Z 24272 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/dating-is-easy-agree-or-disagree 2026-04-15T07:35:55.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/BkmwgoXO7No/maxresdefault.jpg Dating is Easy Agree or Disagree We're in the best period of dating that we've ever been in as a society," Kareem offers. A rider on the subway isn't buying it. 100% disagree. Dating now is the wild west, no rules, total chaos. But here's the thing: for the first time in history, people actually get to choose who they marry and why. Love isn't even the requirement anymore. This stranger wants someone they like, someone with good vibes, someone who watches the same TV shows. That's the bar. When everything's possible and nothing's certain, maybe compatibility matters more than romance ever did. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BkmwgoXO7No https://www.youtube.com/embed/BkmwgoXO7No 27 2024-02-18T19:00:06.000Z 20525 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/seasonal-decorations-should-be-year-round-agree-or-disagree 2026-04-15T07:36:00.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/9QnZZ6VMjs0/maxresdefault.jpg Seasonal Decorations Should Be Year Round? 🎄🎗️ 👻🎃💖💌 Agree or Disagree? A straphanger makes the case that seasonal decorations should stick around all year, pointing out the double standard: skeletons everywhere in October are totally fine, but "if you got your whole door covered in hearts and doilies in July, like what's wrong with this guy?" Kareem pushes back. Maybe people just like ghosts year-round. The rider admits you could always claim it's not technically a Halloween decoration, though that's apparently how they "got into this mess" in the first place. Hearts are their favorite. The debate hinges on whether off-season decor reads as lazy or just enthusiastic, and there's no clear winner here. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9QnZZ6VMjs0 https://www.youtube.com/embed/9QnZZ6VMjs0 41 2024-02-15T23:00:09.000Z 23748 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/aging-is-sexy-agree-or-disagree 2026-04-15T07:36:03.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/8azgDQFpotE/maxresdefault.jpg Aging is SEXY. Agree or disagree? Aging is sexy, period. That's the confident take from a straphanger who celebrates wrinkles as signs of wisdom and life fully lived. Older women and men? Hot. Kareem asks who the sexiest old person is, prompting enthusiastic shouts for Meryl Streep and Barbara Streisand. The rider can't contain their admiration: "Barbara's so F hot." It's a refreshing celebration of beauty beyond youth, delivered with zero hesitation and pure conviction on the subway platform. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8azgDQFpotE https://www.youtube.com/embed/8azgDQFpotE 25 2024-02-12T19:39:22.000Z 21893 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/no-more-weddings-agree-or-disagree 2026-04-15T07:36:08.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/WUHxQpyOHzQ/maxresdefault.jpg No More Weddings? 💒 Agree or Disagree? A woman on the subway has strong opinions about white people weddings, and she's not holding back. She tells Kareem they're meaningless spectacles propped up by the wedding industrial complex, comparing them to Valentine's Day. Fake, manufactured, empty. She even calls out the flower girl tradition as "ew" for symbolizing the bride as a child. Her real gripe? Couples who spend $100,000 on a wedding and then complain they can't afford a house. Forget the Starbucks and avocado toast excuses. It's the wedding that's killing their finances. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WUHxQpyOHzQ https://www.youtube.com/embed/WUHxQpyOHzQ 36 2024-02-11T19:10:57.000Z 20877 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/boomers-ruined-everything-is-it-time-for-revenge 2026-04-15T07:36:12.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/fBUFuOS_uKc/maxresdefault.jpg Boomers Ruined Everything. is It Time for Revenge? A straphanger has some radical ideas about how to deal with the Boomer generation, and they're not holding back. Strip voting rights at 65. Ban reading glasses nationwide. Mandate that any Boomer behind the wheel has to drive over 70 mph, or just take away their licenses entirely. Kareem's on board with the chaos, calling it "reverse reparations" as the proposals get wilder. The rider's dead serious about leveling the playing field after Boomers "ruined the world." It's part policy proposal, part generational warfare, and entirely unhinged. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fBUFuOS_uKc https://www.youtube.com/embed/fBUFuOS_uKc 50 2024-02-09T19:03:38.000Z 23545 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/does-he-have-a-point-though 2026-04-15T07:36:16.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/ahzdzHLdJkA/maxresdefault.jpg Does He Have a Point Though? 🤨 A stranger on the subway has strong opinions about vertical video, calling it "one of the worst things that's happened in a hundred years of filmmaking and cinema." Kareem pushes back hard. The rider argues that since phones are vertical, vertical content makes sense. Your eyes are horizontal, Kareem counters. Movie theater screens are huge and horizontal for a reason. The stranger isn't buying it, insisting you don't need vertical eyes to enjoy vertical content. It's a surprisingly heated debate about aspect ratios and how we consume media in the smartphone era. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ahzdzHLdJkA https://www.youtube.com/embed/ahzdzHLdJkA 38 2024-02-08T18:50:08.000Z 17335 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/is-this-what-ruined-movies-agree-or-disagree 2026-04-15T07:36:20.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/t0gL6tbp6lY/maxresdefault.jpg Is This What Ruined Movies🍿 Agree or Disagree Reserve ticketing killed the movie theater, according to a straphanger with a nostalgic view of cinema's past. The rider argues that back in the day, you'd just show up on a Friday night and take whatever seats were available, even if that meant sitting apart from your friends. It didn't matter. Now people check the seating chart online, see the middle seats are taken, and decide not to go at all. Kareem pushes back, defending his preference for good seats and recliners. The rider's response? You never had that option before, so why should it matter now? https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=t0gL6tbp6lY https://www.youtube.com/embed/t0gL6tbp6lY 35 2024-02-07T19:00:22.000Z 18205 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/rock-paper-scissors-solves-everything 2026-04-15T07:36:23.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/tshAoZOANqA/maxresdefault.jpg Rock paper scissors solves EVERYTHING? Rock, paper, scissors settles everything for this subway rider and his friends. Arguments, bets, who pays for lunch. It's the universal decider. Kareem meets a true believer in the power of the game, someone who'd played just yesterday to avoid buying a meal. He won two out of three. The kicker? He didn't even ask how much lunch cost. When you win at rock, paper, scissors, the details don't matter. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tshAoZOANqA https://www.youtube.com/embed/tshAoZOANqA 31 2024-01-31T19:06:38.000Z 23997 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/should-photos-have-a-limit 2026-04-15T07:36:28.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/8djrrwZw4R8/maxresdefault.jpg Should Photos Have a Limit? 🤳 A straphanger pitches a radical policy: every person gets exactly 36 photos per year. That's it. No exceptions for vacations, birthdays, or even professional photographers. The logic? We've already taken all the photos that will ever exist, and every new shot is just a duplicate nobody needs. Plus, taking photos in public is inherently selfish, distracting from other people's experiences. Kareem pushes back on the photographer angle, but the rider doubles down. Those 36 photos are going to count, let me tell you. It's an absurdist take that somehow makes you think twice about how casually we snap pictures of everything. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8djrrwZw4R8 https://www.youtube.com/embed/8djrrwZw4R8 38 2024-01-30T18:27:22.000Z 26128 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/does-your-screen-time-affect-your-love-life 2026-04-15T07:36:32.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/D7iWVFnAfqY/maxresdefault.jpg Does Your Screen Time Affect Your Love Life? 🫤 A straphanger with 9 hours and 12 minutes of daily screen time admits he's not having sex. Zero. But there's hope: he's down 12% from last week because he flirted with someone. Kareem chimes in with his own screen time of 7 hours, and the two bond over their phone addiction. The conversation turns into a quick referendum on whether staring at your phone all day kills your love life. Spoiler: it does. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=D7iWVFnAfqY https://www.youtube.com/embed/D7iWVFnAfqY 32 2024-01-29T20:47:32.000Z 22482 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/the-skincare-conspiracy-is-real 2026-04-15T07:36:38.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/3FzCd6ownp8/maxresdefault.jpg The Skincare Conspiracy is Real? A straphanger drops an unexpected theory: skincare is capitalism's conspiracy to hide our collective exhaustion. She partakes in the routines but doesn't believe in them, arguing that if nobody looks tired from inhumane labor conditions, we can't recognize our shared misery. Kareem cuts to the chase with his trademark bluntness, rephrasing her point about wanting visible proof that everyone's suffering under the same system. She agrees. The conversation pivots fast when Kareem notices her skin looks great despite the anti-skincare stance, leaving one burning question: what's her actual routine? https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3FzCd6ownp8 https://www.youtube.com/embed/3FzCd6ownp8 37 2024-01-27T20:17:35.000Z 25547 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/sht-talking-your-friends-is-good-for-you 2026-04-15T07:36:42.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/8fC1Wx511Y0/maxresdefault.jpg Sh%t Talking Your Friends is Good for You? A rider on the subway reveals he's $100,000 in credit card debt but insists he's headed to St. Barts on Tuesday and the Gucci store today. Money will always come back, he tells Kareem. It's all about abundance mindset. Being broke? That's just a state of mind, and if people stopped thinking they were broke, they wouldn't be. The banks got him, sure, but he's already pulled out a new card. The philosophy is simple: spend like the cash will materialize, and somehow it will. This is financial advice from someone living completely untethered from reality. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8fC1Wx511Y0 https://www.youtube.com/embed/8fC1Wx511Y0 36 2024-01-25T18:06:12.000Z 23169 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/best-breakfast-out-there 2026-04-15T07:36:47.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/azH2CQwV8pM/maxresdefault.jpg Best Breakfast Out There? 🥐 A straphanger makes a bold claim: the ham and cheese croissant beats the iconic bacon egg and cheese as New York's best breakfast value. His reasoning? Price. Bacon egg and cheese runs seven bucks minimum, while his croissant of choice costs just $4.49. He's committed to the bit, eating them a few times a week and even bringing his second croissant of the day onto the train to share with Kareem. The debate hinges on pure economics, though there's some confusion about whether it's just ham and cheese or includes egg too. Either way, this rider's ready to die on the croissant hill. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=azH2CQwV8pM https://www.youtube.com/embed/azH2CQwV8pM 31 2024-01-22T19:14:46.000Z 27467 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/nyc-rats-are-cute 2026-04-15T07:36:51.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/3Wi2YiYabas/maxresdefault.jpg NYC Rats Are Cute? 🐀 An Australian straphanger brings a wild perspective to New York's rat problem: they're actually cute. Coming from a country where "literally every animal can kill you," she tells Kareem that NYC's rodents are harmless by comparison. Rats are a walk in the park. In Australia, everything wants to mess you up. Here? They're just fuzzy little creatures minding their business. It's all about context, and when you've survived a continent designed to end you, subway rats barely register as a threat. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3Wi2YiYabas https://www.youtube.com/embed/3Wi2YiYabas 28 2024-01-19T20:42:04.000Z 22039 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/punctuation-is-good-but-do-we-need-it 2026-04-15T07:36:56.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/U9CfhNpfBbI/maxresdefault.jpg Punctuation is Good, but Do We Need It? A straphanger has strong feelings about punctuation in text messages, and they're not about proper grammar. For them, a simple "thanks period" or "hello period" reads as aggressive, even scary. It signals anger, not linguistic precision. Kareem pushes back: maybe some people just like punctuation. The rider insists it's necessary in general writing but offensive in texts, where a period transforms friendly words into something ominous. It's a debate about tone, intention, and how we've collectively decided that ending a casual message with a period means you're definitely mad. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=U9CfhNpfBbI https://www.youtube.com/embed/U9CfhNpfBbI 29 2024-01-17T19:44:47.000Z 11262 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/hire-a-bad-lawyer-really 2026-04-15T07:37:00.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/rSx6ylA0M88/maxresdefault.jpg Hire a Bad Lawyer, Really ⚖️ A rider on the subway pitches a counterintuitive legal strategy: if you're accused of something, hire the worst lawyer you can find. The logic? Showing up with a powerful attorney signals guilt because it means you're scared and need someone who can "mend and mold the law" to protect you. But if your lawyer is fumbling with papers and saying "Oh golly G," the jury will feel sympathy. They'll back you up. Kareem pushes back on the premise, asking what the actual solution would be. The rider doubles down. Incompetence breeds trust. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rSx6ylA0M88 https://www.youtube.com/embed/rSx6ylA0M88 40 2024-01-15T20:12:15.000Z 26229 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/dont-panic 2026-04-15T07:37:05.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/UYkQ7qsuFVU/maxresdefault.jpg Don’t Panic 🫨 A straphanger shares an unusual philosophy about mortality: the dumbest thing you can do is freak out when you're dying. Stay calm, let it happen. Kareem tests the theory with increasingly bizarre scenarios. What if you get shot? "Ride the wave of life and death," the rider insists. Your soul will be okay. Choking? Well, some self-defense is natural. But once you're confirmed going to go, just accept it. It's a strangely zen take on panic, death, and the precise moment you should stop fighting for your life. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UYkQ7qsuFVU https://www.youtube.com/embed/UYkQ7qsuFVU 43 2024-01-14T21:42:31.000Z 23160 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/popcorn-is-overrated 2026-04-15T07:37:11.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/y7UN8fX9lzI/maxresdefault.jpg Popcorn is Overrated 🍿 Popcorn is overrated, according to a straphanger who'd rather snack on bread and butter at the movies. The problem? It's dry, bland, and gets stuck in your teeth. When people defend popcorn by pointing to butter, that's missing the point. You just like butter. Kareem presses on the logistics: would movie theater bread and butter come in little croutons, or what? The rider envisions slices like you'd get in a bread basket at a restaurant. Picture this: walking into AMC Cinemas and ordering a full bread basket instead of popcorn. It's absurd, sure, but honestly more appealing than another kernel lodged between your molars. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=y7UN8fX9lzI https://www.youtube.com/embed/y7UN8fX9lzI 44 2024-01-13T22:09:26.000Z 19559 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/the-best-phone 2026-04-15T07:37:14.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/vg0qeGZvE3c/maxresdefault.jpg The Best Phone? 📱 A straphanger argues that Androids are objectively superior to iPhones, claiming people only buy Apple products "to shame Android users." The rider invokes Karl Marx's concept of conspicuous consumption to explain iPhone elitism. Kareem feigns ignorance. "Wait, who's that? How do you live in Brooklyn?" The conversation centers on the social performance of tech choices rather than actual product quality, with the interviewee insisting that better battery life and functionality lose out to status signaling every time. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vg0qeGZvE3c https://www.youtube.com/embed/vg0qeGZvE3c 35 2024-01-12T18:43:55.000Z 8068624 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/no-more-podcasts-agree-or-disagree 2026-04-15T07:37:19.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/_LTyB3u8GCM/maxresdefault.jpg No More Podcasts? Agree or Disagree? A straphanger has had enough of the podcast explosion and wants to ban new shows entirely. While existing podcasts can survive, they argue it should be illegal to launch another one because everyone and their mother bought a microphone on Amazon and now thinks people care about their takes on food, sports, or culture. Kareem captures the rant in full force. The rider's disgust is palpable: they see podcasting as "people jerking themselves off on the air" while pretending they're doing something meaningful. It's a volcanic take on media oversaturation. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_LTyB3u8GCM https://www.youtube.com/embed/_LTyB3u8GCM 26 2024-01-11T22:15:59.000Z 13558 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/does-he-have-a-point 2026-04-15T07:37:23.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/dWDjH4vbwcg/maxresdefault.jpg Does He Have a Point? A straphanger has a controversial theory: great artists earn the right to be assholes. The better your work, the worse you can behave. It's a sliding scale. Quentin Tarantino gets a pass because he makes "all bangers." Nicki Minaj? She's earned it. Morrissey can be difficult. But the guys in Oasis? They haven't built up enough goodwill to be jerks to legends like Morrissey, though they're allowed to trash newer bands like The 1975. Kareem seems to agree with the hierarchy, at least when it comes to British rock feuds. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dWDjH4vbwcg https://www.youtube.com/embed/dWDjH4vbwcg 39 2024-01-10T18:27:12.000Z 21420 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/this-is-why-you-feel-bad-when-you-are-not-working 2026-04-15T07:37:28.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/Qa4BpRD0DOg/maxresdefault.jpg This is Why You Feel Bad When You Are Not Working 😟 A straphanger drops some Marx on Kareem, explaining how "capitalism has colonized chill mode." The rider argues that capitalism conditions us to feel guilty when we're not productive, creating an impossible cycle where relaxation triggers shame and constant work leads to burnout. They bring up alienation theory. Workers stuck in silos, no community, just endless depression. Kareem gets it. The conversation cuts to the heart of why downtime feels wrong in a culture that measures your worth by output, and why you can't shake that nagging feeling every time you try to just exist without producing something. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Qa4BpRD0DOg https://www.youtube.com/embed/Qa4BpRD0DOg 36 2024-01-09T19:04:49.000Z 21019 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/is-this-the-most-disgusting-drink 2026-04-15T05:18:53.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/v4f9YgAU4Yw/maxresdefault.jpg Is This the Most Disgusting Drink? 🍸 The host confronts a subway rider about what might be the most revolting drink they've ever encountered or actually enjoy consuming. The conversation gets into the nitty gritty of why certain beverage combinations make people gag while others swear by them. It's gross. The debate gets heated as they discuss ingredients and whether disgust is subjective or if some drinks are objectively nasty. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=v4f9YgAU4Yw https://www.youtube.com/embed/v4f9YgAU4Yw 43 2024-01-08T18:51:35.000Z 20472 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/is-this-a-great-idea-or-what 2026-04-15T05:18:57.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/8qp8h5TMKAM/maxresdefault.jpg Is This a Great Idea or What? The host questions whether their entire show concept is actually brilliant or completely ridiculous, turning the camera on themselves for once. Without a transcript, it's tough to know if a guest weighs in or if this is pure self-reflection. Either way, it's meta as hell. The title alone suggests someone's having doubts or maybe just fishing for validation from random subway riders about this whole interviewing strangers thing. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8qp8h5TMKAM https://www.youtube.com/embed/8qp8h5TMKAM 37 2024-01-07T19:00:49.000Z 20457 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/this-is-the-only-way-to-go-offline 2026-04-15T05:19:01.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/OOzgpVWgEog/maxresdefault.jpg This is the Only Way to Go Offline 🛜 A subway passenger shares their hot take on the only real way to disconnect from the internet and social media. Spoiler: it's probably more extreme than just deleting apps or turning off notifications. The guest argues that half measures don't work when you're trying to actually go offline. They get into why most people's attempts to unplug fail and what drastic step you actually need to take if you're serious about reclaiming your attention. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OOzgpVWgEog https://www.youtube.com/embed/OOzgpVWgEog 28 2024-01-04T19:06:03.000Z 21571 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/this-is-how-you-fix-public-transport 2026-04-15T07:37:38.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/_E0MZQq8pk0/maxresdefault.jpg This is How You Fix Public Transport 🚇 A straphanger pitches a radical solution to subway crowding: worker-only hours from 8 to 9 AM and 5 to 6 PM. No tourists allowed. The logic is simple. There's "absolutely no reason for a European family of five with all their luggage" to clog up the morning commute when ten workers could be using that space instead. Kareem loves it. The rider insists the evening restriction matters just as much, partly for service industry schedules but mostly because they need to "be in a recumbent position as soon as possible." It's a fantasy transit policy born from pure commuter exhaustion. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_E0MZQq8pk0 https://www.youtube.com/embed/_E0MZQq8pk0 38 2024-01-02T18:29:29.000Z 21230 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/is-life-too-long-agree-or-disagree 2026-04-15T07:37:44.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/9b7JCek6BWk/maxresdefault.jpg Is Life Too Long? Agree or Disagree? A straphanger took a life expectancy test, got 95, and immediately started smoking cigarettes. That's his response to realizing he might live nearly a century. He's not saying we should get rid of the olds, but he personally wants to check out around 64. Kareem pushes back, pointing out plenty of octogenarians who seem to be doing fine, making films and dating younger people. The rider isn't convinced. When's the last time you saw an 80-year-old truly living well? The conversation turns into an oddly morbid debate about whether longevity is actually a blessing or just too much time on earth. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9b7JCek6BWk https://www.youtube.com/embed/9b7JCek6BWk 40 2024-01-01T18:32:55.000Z 25413 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/dogs-or-cats-which-one-is-better 2026-04-15T07:37:50.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/e7Bbkq1d1R0/maxresdefault.jpg Dogs or Cats? 🦮🐈 Which One is Better? A subway rider declares that dogs are better than cats, sparking a spirited debate with Kareem, who's firmly Team Feline. The dog lover owns a lab-golden mix named Sunny and argues that dogs are "gullible and just loving," always happy to see you with a tail wag. Kareem isn't buying it. He pushes back with his own case for cats, pointing out that dogs demand constant walks and attention. The conversation gets playful when Kareem asks if the rider's cats are hairless, prompting a quick "you can't say that" response. It's a lighthearted clash of pet preferences, complete with tail-wagging versus sly feline behavior as the central battleground. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=e7Bbkq1d1R0 https://www.youtube.com/embed/e7Bbkq1d1R0 35 2023-12-29T19:17:19.000Z 23063 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/bring-back-duels 2026-04-15T07:37:54.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/dzVVAdOvWic/maxresdefault.jpg Bring Back Duels ⚔️ A straphanger has a modest proposal: bring back duels to the death. Not just with guns, but with any weapon of your choosing, like golden era dueling rules. Challenged someone on Twitter? Duel them. Some kid bullying you online? Challenge the child and, well, finish the job. Kareem asks if they've ever actually dueled. No, because it's illegal in all 50 states. The logic is airtight: dueling would be a great way to settle any infraction you want. Ten paces, two guns, problem solved. Democracy dies in darkness, but apparently thrives at gunpoint. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dzVVAdOvWic https://www.youtube.com/embed/dzVVAdOvWic 39 2023-12-28T18:30:45.000Z 20720 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/jack-harlow-gets-the-pass 2026-04-15T07:37:59.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/jAbL3rG4tzY/maxresdefault.jpg Jack Harlow Gets the Pass? A straphanger makes the bold claim that Jack Harlow should get the N-word pass because he's "donated so much to the Black community." Kareem pushes back, asking if it's really about his charitable contributions or his rap credentials that would make him more valid than Drake. The conversation gets wilder when DJ Khaled enters the discussion. The guy insists Harlow's basically Black anyway. "He's not Black. You should look it up. Do your research." The logic is wild, the confidence unshakeable, and Kareem's reactions sell the whole absurd exchange. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jAbL3rG4tzY https://www.youtube.com/embed/jAbL3rG4tzY 40 2023-12-27T18:46:26.000Z 15733 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/social-media-content-should-expire 2026-04-15T07:38:04.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/gh2e3f4ueec/maxresdefault.jpg Social Media Content Should Expire? All content on social media should expire," a straphanger tells Kareem, launching into a vision of the internet that's fundamentally impermanent. Nothing should stick around forever. The default should be deletion, not preservation. If you really want to keep something, print it out and stick it in a photo album. Better yet, there should be an annual book of your life on social media, a collection you can actually hold. The rider extends this thinking to friend requests too. Why should adding someone mean you're connected for life until you manually unfollow? Let connections expire naturally when you stop talking to someone. They fade from your feed. You drift apart. Oops. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gh2e3f4ueec https://www.youtube.com/embed/gh2e3f4ueec 31 2023-12-25T19:08:26.000Z 21590 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/commercials-should-not-be-funny 2026-04-15T07:38:09.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/zzEuoyj1g0o/maxresdefault.jpg Commercials Should Not Be Funny 🤷 Funny commercials represent the downfall of civilization, according to one straphanger who shares a scorching take about advertising with Kareem. The rider argues that humorous ads have blurred the lines between reality and fabrication, creating a world where brands tweet at each other and everyone tailors themselves to be advertiser-friendly. He'd rather see boring, informative spots. Just show him an Acura he can drive. Skip the entertainment value entirely. Kareem pushes back, asking if there's no appreciation for the creativity, but the rider stands firm: he wants to buy things based on what they actually do, not because Oscar Mayer wieners is posting ironic content online. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zzEuoyj1g0o https://www.youtube.com/embed/zzEuoyj1g0o 38 2023-12-21T19:15:52.000Z 21666 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/nobody-knows-anything-agree-or-disagree 2026-04-15T07:38:15.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/uYTDCQpZPSQ/maxresdefault.jpg Nobody Knows Anything 🤷 Agree or Disagree? Everybody's got a take these days. Nobody knows anything." That's the worldview of one weary straphanger who's had it with hot takes from people who have no business weighing in. He paints a picture: a straw salesman suddenly offering solutions to the bank crisis. Everyone thinks they're an expert. Kareem asks for his take anyway, which is perfectly ironic. The rider doesn't hold back. He thinks the whole culture of takes is dumb, that we've all become armchair experts on everything when we should probably just shut up. It's a meta moment for a show literally called Subway Takes. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uYTDCQpZPSQ https://www.youtube.com/embed/uYTDCQpZPSQ 17 2023-12-20T18:57:30.000Z 19893 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/the-truth-about-babies-in-planes 2026-04-15T07:38:21.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/ROk4w6egtMw/maxresdefault.jpg The Truth About Babies in Planes ✈️ A straphanger proposes what might be the most reasonable airline solution yet: a soundproof baby section on every plane. The seating order? First class, business, extra legroom, economy, babies. It's not about banishing infants to the back of the aircraft. It's actually generous. The rider argues this setup benefits everyone, especially parents who currently spend ten-hour flights apologizing for their crying newborns. Why should they have to say sorry when everyone knows babies cry? Kareem asks the practical question: do babies fly free in this special section? That depends on whether the seats need to be redesigned for infant comfort. The engineering details get fuzzy, but the core idea stands. Parents get relief from constant apologies. Other passengers get predictable quiet. Babies get a zone where no one judges them for being babies. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ROk4w6egtMw https://www.youtube.com/embed/ROk4w6egtMw 42 2023-12-19T18:49:54.000Z 21381 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/never-say-this-in-the-hood 2026-04-15T07:38:27.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/LA21uha5-xc/maxresdefault.jpg Never Say This in the Hood🤫 A rider from Harlem breaks down the unspoken rules of street culture with Kareem, warning that certain vocabulary just doesn't fly in the hood. His advice? If you have ADD or consider yourself neurodivergent, keep that information to yourself. Dead serious. He imagines the scenario: walking through Harlem announcing "I'm neurodivergent, dog" and getting an immediate "Bro, what?" at best, or getting robbed at worst. The message is clear: some clinical terms don't translate to the streets, and if you're new to the area, it's better to keep things on the DL rather than risk getting clowned or worse. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LA21uha5-xc https://www.youtube.com/embed/LA21uha5-xc 36 2023-12-18T19:22:16.000Z 21605 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/get-your-hair-done-agree-or-disagree 2026-04-15T07:38:31.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/B8t-ByoTUS8/maxresdefault.jpg Get Your Hair Done ✂️agree or Disagree? A straphanger delivers a firm opinion on male grooming: ball sacks should be trimmed at minimum. "I don't want to take a piece of you home with me," they explain, citing both sensory and aesthetic concerns. Kareem pushes back, admitting he doesn't mind a little hair, though he draws the line at maximum length. The stranger stands firm on their take. It's a hilariously frank conversation about personal preferences that most people wouldn't discuss on camera, let alone while riding the subway. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=B8t-ByoTUS8 https://www.youtube.com/embed/B8t-ByoTUS8 39 2023-12-17T19:05:16.000Z 28801 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/which-food-is-better 2026-04-15T07:38:36.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/GGDSdYr4ZdQ/maxresdefault.jpg Which Food is Better? 🇵🇷🇩🇴 Kareem ambushes a straphanger with a bold claim: Puerto Rican food beats Dominican food, hands down. The debate zeroes in on potato salad. Purple potato salad? That's what Dominicans make, apparently, with beets that have no business being there. "You ever seen blue potato salad?" Kareem asks. The rider stays diplomatic at first but can't help defending arroz con gandules, which he calls "the essence of Puerto Rican flavor." It's a playful food fight between two Caribbean cuisines, with Kareem leading the charge on behalf of Puerto Rico and the stranger trying to stay neutral before his true loyalties slip out. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GGDSdYr4ZdQ https://www.youtube.com/embed/GGDSdYr4ZdQ 43 2023-12-16T18:53:46.000Z 17718 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/wait-what 2026-04-15T07:38:40.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/6q-SLGUe2PM/maxresdefault.jpg Wait, What?😮 A straphanger offers one of the wildest parenting takes ever captured on the subway: if someone hits their kid in public, everyone else should get a turn too. Kareem tries to follow the logic as the rider doubles down, arguing that a beating from parents who love you is the real punishment, so a stranger getting involved is just "a bonus." The conversation veers into uncomfortable territory. Fast. It's the kind of moment that makes you wonder if you heard that right. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6q-SLGUe2PM https://www.youtube.com/embed/6q-SLGUe2PM 33 2023-12-15T19:22:33.000Z 26381 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/the-reason-why-astrology-is-a-scam-agree-or-disagree 2026-04-15T07:38:45.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/YqeRoK0IZcg/maxresdefault.jpg The Reason Why Astrology is a Scam ♋️ Agree or Disagree? A straphanger goes scorched earth on astrology, declaring it a complete scam. People need to stop blaming toxic behavior on their zodiac signs. "You're going to sit there, look me in my face and say 'I cheated on my girlfriend because I'm a Scorpio'? You need therapy, guy." The rider calls out everyone who uses their sign as an excuse for personality flaws or bad decisions. When Kareem reveals he's a Cancer, the response proves the point: "Oh, that's why you're like the way that you are." The whole thing is absurd. Both agree the astrology defense is just mental illness dressed up in celestial nonsense. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YqeRoK0IZcg https://www.youtube.com/embed/YqeRoK0IZcg 44 2023-12-14T19:37:33.000Z 14971 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/the-worst-pizza-agree-or-disagree 2026-04-15T07:38:49.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/Gv51P6M75Hc/maxresdefault.jpg The Worst Pizza? 🍕agree or Disagree? Pineapple on pizza is "disgusting" and "disrespectful to real pizza fans," according to a rider who isn't holding back. Slimy texture? Check. Total dealbreaker? Absolutely. But there's something even worse in this person's book: anchovies. They'd rather eat pineapple than anchovies, which they compare to dipping your slice directly in a lake. Kareem chimes in with his own anchovy skepticism, pointing out that pizza deserves better fish. Even SpongeBob knows anchovies don't get respect. The conversation captures that particular New York passion for strong opinions about what does and doesn't belong on a proper slice. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Gv51P6M75Hc https://www.youtube.com/embed/Gv51P6M75Hc 38 2023-12-13T18:55:20.000Z 16528 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/the-dmv-is-hell-on-earth-who-can-relate 2026-04-15T07:38:55.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/SDLmIxWyoBs/maxresdefault.jpg The DMV is Hell on Earth 🔥 Who Can Relate? A woman recounts her nightmare day dealing with bureaucracy, starting with a DMV employee who nearly denied her license renewal over a debit card statement versus a bank statement technicality. The hostility peaked during the eye test when the worker snapped, "Is you taking baby steps? Get over there. Take two grown ass steps." She was on the verge of tears. The contrast? When she went to the library afterward expecting similar hell, they asked her to simply write her name on what she describes as "a ragged ass piece of toilet paper" and handed over a card. Kareem suggests a brilliant solution: force DMV and library employees to swap jobs every two weeks. She's all in. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SDLmIxWyoBs https://www.youtube.com/embed/SDLmIxWyoBs 55 2023-12-12T18:48:44.000Z 21775 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/music-concerts-are-overrated-agree-or-disagree 2026-04-15T07:39:01.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/qWubgt8PW_k/maxresdefault.jpg Music Concerts Are Overrated? 🏟️agree or Disagree? A straphanger makes the case that concerts have become exhausting ordeals nobody actually wants to attend. The whole experience is broken, they argue: you book tickets months out with friends who inevitably bail, leaving you to drag yourself to a Wednesday night show after work. Then comes airport-level security, mandatory wristbands linked to your credit card for overpriced drinks that are either too weak or too strong, and somehow every concert now features five opening acts like it's a full festival. Kareem listens as the rider dismantles the modern live music experience piece by piece. It's a rant that'll resonate with anyone who's ever felt trapped by tickets they bought in a moment of optimism. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qWubgt8PW_k https://www.youtube.com/embed/qWubgt8PW_k 51 2023-12-11T18:43:05.000Z 22901 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/is-this-what-ruined-movies-agree-or-disagree-2 2026-04-15T07:39:06.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/OMLoUStD08c/maxresdefault.jpg Is This What Ruined Movies?🍿 Agree or Disagree? Reserve ticketing killed the movie theater, according to a rider who thinks audiences lost their spontaneity the moment they could choose their seats online. Before reserved seating existed, you'd just show up on a Friday night and take whatever was available. Sometimes you'd sit nowhere near your friends. That didn't matter. Now? People see the middle seats are taken and bail entirely. Kareem pushes back, defending his preference for recliners and good seats, but the rider isn't buying it. You never had that option before, so why does it matter now? It's a nostalgic argument for inconvenience as the price of keeping cinema culture alive. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OMLoUStD08c https://www.youtube.com/embed/OMLoUStD08c 35 2023-12-09T18:40:24.000Z 42925 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/make-movies-hot-again-agree-or-disagree 2026-04-15T07:39:11.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/j8dfT24vEfg/maxresdefault.jpg Make Movies Hot Again 🔥agree or Disagree? Movies need to be horny again. That's the thesis from a straphanger who's had enough of vanilla streaming content and wants Hollywood to return to the shameless sensuality of Basic Instinct and Cruel Intentions. Kareem tests the theory with Sharon Stone's legendary leg cross. Can anyone name a modern equivalent? Nope. The rider argues that today's films have lost their erotic edge, replaced by safe, forgettable fare churned out for quantity over quality. They even trace the origins of step-sibling porn back to Cruel Intentions. It's a passionate defense of horniness as an essential ingredient in filmmaking, and honestly, they might have a point about what's missing from contemporary cinema. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=j8dfT24vEfg https://www.youtube.com/embed/j8dfT24vEfg 32 2023-12-08T19:03:06.000Z 21695 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/the-internet-should-not-exist-agree-or-disagree 2026-04-15T07:39:17.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/Rv6QNuzgd-Q/maxresdefault.jpg The Internet Should Not Exist? 🛜 Agree or Disagree? The internet shouldn't exist," a subway rider declares to Kareem, arguing that society was doing just fine before we all got online. Sure, medical technology's great. But authentic human connection? That's been obliterated. When Kareem asks the obvious follow-up, why not just log off yourself?, the rider admits the uncomfortable truth: she's completely addicted. She can't quit unless everyone quits together, which is why she's making her plea on camera. It's a perfect contradiction. She knows the internet's rotting our brains, but she's trapped in the same doom scroll as the rest of us, waiting for collective salvation that'll never come. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Rv6QNuzgd-Q https://www.youtube.com/embed/Rv6QNuzgd-Q 39 2023-12-07T16:37:00.000Z 17503 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/books-are-pretentious-agree-or-disagree 2026-04-15T07:39:21.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/oEI0kGPQe4U/maxresdefault.jpg Books Are Pretentious? 📚 Agree or Disagree? A straphanger has a scorching hot take: books are just "TikTok without sound or video." Statistically speaking, the worst content there is. Kareem pushes back, but this rider isn't budging. Reading in public? That's peacocking. It's like wearing a fedora. People who read on the subway are just showing off, treating books like fashion accessories to get attention from the opposite sex. Why read when you could watch a documentary or scroll TikTok instead? The contempt is palpable as this anonymous New Yorker tears into literary culture with zero remorse. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oEI0kGPQe4U https://www.youtube.com/embed/oEI0kGPQe4U 31 2023-12-06T18:56:18.000Z 19861 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/the-beach-is-overratedagree-or-disagree 2026-04-15T07:39:26.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/m-5ih5TXR8A/maxresdefault.jpg The Beach is Overrated🏖️agree or Disagree? A straphanger delivers a full-throated anti-beach manifesto that's equal parts observational comedy and genuine grievance. The complaints pile up fast: SPF 80 that turns sandy, freezing water with mysterious sharp objects underfoot, constantly worrying about your phone getting stolen, currents dragging you 50 feet from your towel, moving a beach umbrella every five minutes to chase shade, day drinking to cope with it all, then riding the train home an hour with sand all in your crotch. Kareem lets the rant breathe. It's a masterclass in committed contrarianism about something most people claim to love. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=m-5ih5TXR8A https://www.youtube.com/embed/m-5ih5TXR8A 60 2023-12-05T18:55:11.000Z 22083 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/there-is-a-plant-conspiracy-agree-or-disagree 2026-04-15T07:39:31.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/bJGidJ6aWLQ/maxresdefault.jpg There is a Plant Conspiracy 🌿 Agree or Disagree? A straphanger has a theory about why your houseplants keep dying: they're sold sick. The conspiracy, according to this rider, is that potted plants come pre-diseased, which explains why they die even when you give them sunlight and water. "It's not your fault," they insist. Plants are the least demanding living thing you can own. They're easier than kids or pets. And yet they still perish. Kareem asks the natural follow-up: how many plants does this person actually have? One. Well, one dead one. It's basically a memorial now. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bJGidJ6aWLQ https://www.youtube.com/embed/bJGidJ6aWLQ 33 2023-12-01T19:22:48.000Z 25896 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/water-or-paper-agree-or-disagree 2026-04-15T07:39:35.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/UKICj218OQA/maxresdefault.jpg Water or Paper? 💩agree or Disagree? A straphanger makes an impassioned case for bidets, arguing that "big toilet paper has gotten us addicted" to an inferior product. The rider rattles off benefits: environmentally friendly, money-saving, more efficient, and cleaner. Kareem hears the logic laid out through an analogy about stepping in something unpleasant in the city. Paper just smears it around. But a hose? That's pressure. That's what actually cleans. The conversation champions the bidet as the obvious solution Americans refuse to embrace. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UKICj218OQA https://www.youtube.com/embed/UKICj218OQA 25 2023-11-30T18:40:41.000Z 25784 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/fancy-food-is-a-scam-agree-or-disagree 2026-04-15T07:39:40.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/uiAuR1r3auw/maxresdefault.jpg Fancy Food is a Scam 🧆 Agree or Disagree? A straphanger drops a bomb: fancy food is "pretentious," "overpriced," and frankly ugly. Total scam. Kareem agrees, then breaks out some Michelin star history that makes it all sound even worse. Turns out the Michelin Guide started as a tire marketing scheme in 1800s France. The Michelin brothers wanted to sell more tires, so they got people driving around to restaurants. "It's branding content. It's marketing," the rider says. The whole fine dining industrial complex? Just one long commercial. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uiAuR1r3auw https://www.youtube.com/embed/uiAuR1r3auw 34 2023-11-29T19:11:38.000Z 21989 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/which-one-are-you 2026-04-15T07:39:44.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/Iyv1k0flNVI/maxresdefault.jpg Which One Are You? 🗽 A straphanger declares herself a Samantha before proposing something wild: the Rockefeller Center Christmas tree should be topped with "a life-size ceramic Sarah Jessica Parker." Why SJP over Mariah Carey? She's more of a local unifier, and honestly, we've already seen Christmas Mariah. Kareem seems genuinely surprised by the concept. It's a brief but memorable pitch that somehow manages to honor both Sex and the City fandom and New York City's need for fresh iconography during the holidays. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Iyv1k0flNVI https://www.youtube.com/embed/Iyv1k0flNVI 37 2023-11-28T19:27:17.000Z 21633 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/everythings-gonna-be-ok 2026-04-15T07:39:48.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/cdJSXRkVmjI/maxresdefault.jpg Everything’s Gonna Be Ok 👌🏻 Everything's going to be okay." That's the take from a straphanger offering what might be the simplest, most universal reassurance possible. Everything? Really? Kareem finds himself caught in a philosophical bind: disagree and you're hopeless, agree and you might be naive. It's the kind of optimism that feels both completely empty and oddly necessary, depending on what train you're riding. The rider stands firm. Everything. The whole thing. It'll be fine. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cdJSXRkVmjI https://www.youtube.com/embed/cdJSXRkVmjI 27 2023-11-26T18:52:19.000Z 19519 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/the-weather-is-a-lie-agree-or-disagree 2026-04-15T07:39:53.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/l63Oc1HAYo8/maxresdefault.jpg The Weather is a Lie ☔️ Agree or Disagree? An 89% chance of rain that never materializes has this rider ready to sue Google. He's lugging around his entire rain kit, backpack, raincoat, umbrella, on a day that started at 75 degrees and sunny, stayed mostly clear, and delivered zero precipitation despite yesterday's forecast promising storms at 4 or 5 p.m. The frustration isn't about carrying an umbrella. It's about carrying it when you don't need it. Kareem hears out the grievance against inaccurate weather apps, a complaint that'll resonate with anyone who's ever trusted their phone and ended up overdressed for conditions that never came. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=l63Oc1HAYo8 https://www.youtube.com/embed/l63Oc1HAYo8 33 2023-11-25T19:01:33.000Z 25561 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/wait-what-agree-or-disagree 2026-04-15T07:39:58.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/hqdCsKNX-os/maxresdefault.jpg Wait, What? 🚬 Agree or Disagree? A stranger on the subway drops a contrarian bomb: cigarettes are actually good for you. Well, in moderation. One to two a day can be beneficial, he argues, pointing out that countries with the highest lifespans smoke way more than Americans do. It's good for digestion, apparently. Kareem listens as the rider insists alcohol is probably worse and that the American healthcare system has it all backwards, allowing things in our food that kill us faster than cigarettes ever could. A spicy take that'll have health experts everywhere reaching for their stress balls. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hqdCsKNX-os https://www.youtube.com/embed/hqdCsKNX-os 33 2023-11-24T19:06:25.000Z 31437 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/the-best-tip-to-hook-up-agree-or-disagree 2026-04-15T07:40:01.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/WQ7g0v5Nd6w/maxresdefault.jpg The Best Tip to Hook up? 🤔 Agree or Disagree? The kinder you are, the more beautiful you are." That's the philosophy from a subway rider who's convinced kindness is the ultimate hotness factor. They tell Kareem that meanness makes people ugly, no matter how much God and Botox they throw at the problem. The only cool thing is to be kind. Everything else is just trying too hard. Those leather jacket kids with angry faces? They're not Julian Casablancas or Cavetti. They're full nerds pretending to be something they're not, and it shows. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WQ7g0v5Nd6w https://www.youtube.com/embed/WQ7g0v5Nd6w 34 2023-11-22T18:58:00.000Z 25965 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/should-we-all-get-pregnant-agree-or-disagree 2026-04-15T07:40:05.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/H6VcWcEGBRA/maxresdefault.jpg Should We All Get Pregnant? 👶🏼agree or Disagree? A straphanger delivers a hot take on demographics: people should have more babies instead of getting more pets. The reasoning? Gen Z is cool and smart, and we need more of them before they age into, well, Boomers. Kareem presses the logic. The rider doubles down, insisting the world needs fresh young people because talking to Boomers is "a tragedy." It's a circular argument wrapped in generational anxiety, and the passion behind it makes the case almost compelling. Almost. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=H6VcWcEGBRA https://www.youtube.com/embed/H6VcWcEGBRA 29 2023-11-20T18:59:58.000Z 28904 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/top-gun-deserves-an-oscar-agree-or-disagree 2026-04-15T07:40:11.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/6qCjqgfOLjE/maxresdefault.jpg Top Gun Deserves an Oscar? 🥇agree or Disagree? Top Gun: Maverick deserves Best Picture. That's the fiery take from a subway rider who remembers walking out of the theater ready to fight someone because "movies are back." The moviegoing experience hit different. Popcorn in hand, feeling transported to the '90s again, this wasn't some film you leave thinking "I don't know." Zero hesitation. The passion runs so deep that if another theater next door had been playing it again, they would've walked straight in for round two. Kareem captures that rare moment when someone's so convinced by their opinion that every word lands with total certainty. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6qCjqgfOLjE https://www.youtube.com/embed/6qCjqgfOLjE 33 2023-11-19T19:40:48.000Z 24339 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/disney-adults-agree-or-disagree 2026-04-15T07:40:15.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/P8EFvBGAFqE/maxresdefault.jpg Disney Adults 🐭agree or Disagree? A straphanger has some strong opinions about Disney adults, ranking them as "the worst types of human beings, behind racist." She questions how unemployed someone has to be to visit Disney every couple months and insists it's disgusting. Kareem presses her on the demographics, and she estimates 90 to 95% of Disney adults are white people. The irony? She's been to Disney herself, though she insists once per decade is plenty. Kareem reveals he's never been at all, which she finds "a little shady. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=P8EFvBGAFqE https://www.youtube.com/embed/P8EFvBGAFqE 35 2023-11-18T19:18:08.000Z 28388 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/how-to-get-out-of-the-friend-zone 2026-04-15T07:40:21.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/Ue49KOr-9Pg/maxresdefault.jpg How to Get Out of the Friend Zone 🤔 A meme is sex," declares an anonymous rider who's developed a whole theory about friendship zones. According to this straphanger, there's a friend iceberg where surface-level check-ins about work keep you safe. But the danger zone? That's when you're texting every other day. Once the memes start flowing, you've crossed a line. Kareem listens as his companion explains the precarious layers of modern platonic relationships, where communication frequency matters more than what you actually say. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ue49KOr-9Pg https://www.youtube.com/embed/Ue49KOr-9Pg 25 2023-11-17T21:43:31.000Z 28017 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/diet-is-unhealthy-agree-or-disagree 2026-04-15T07:40:26.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/F67KeF3wSiA/maxresdefault.jpg Diet is Unhealthy? 💀 Agree or Disagree? A straphanger drops one of the wildest health takes Kareem's ever heard: diet and exercise is a myth, pushing the body is unhealthy, and the fitness craze will lead to "early graves." His grandfather? Died from exercising, probably. The guy never works out, never eats healthy, and starts every morning with a toasted bagel with cream cheese and a two-liter of Coke. Then he reclines. His prediction for New York's health-obsessed future is grimly specific: the city's going to need a lot of grave diggers in about 20 years because all these gym rats are dropping early. It's absurd contrarianism taken to its logical extreme, delivered with the confidence of someone who's clearly committed to the bit. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=F67KeF3wSiA https://www.youtube.com/embed/F67KeF3wSiA 53 2023-11-14T11:20:56.000Z 23727 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/farts-in-public-agree-or-disagree 2026-04-15T07:40:32.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/8UIyQiqq6DE/maxresdefault.jpg Farts in Public?💨 Agree or Disagree? A straphanger drops a provocative hot take: we should normalize farting really loud in public whenever you need to. His reasoning? Everyone farts, burps are basically just mouth farts, and 80% of the time farts don't even smell that bad anyway. Kareem can barely keep up as the rider casually admits he rips them constantly at CVS and Chipotle, arguing that farting in public actually commands respect because it shows you don't give a damn. The logic gets increasingly absurd. Why hold it in when 40 people on this train probably need to fart right now? Besides, louder farts feel better. It's pure chaos dressed up as social philosophy, and the rider's completely sincere delivery makes it even funnier. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8UIyQiqq6DE https://www.youtube.com/embed/8UIyQiqq6DE 57 2023-11-13T14:08:48.000Z 21873 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/how-to-make-better-movies-agree-or-disagree 2026-04-15T07:40:37.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/c9NEPkNpFMU/maxresdefault.jpg How to Make Better Movies 🎬 Agree or Disagree? A straphanger has a spicy opinion about runtime: movies should be capped at 90 minutes, and if you can't tell your story in that window, don't bother making it. Period. But wait, it gets better. They argue that the best short movie format already exists on TikTok, where some videos deserve Oscars over films like La La Land. Kareem meets this hot take with enthusiasm, agreeing that brevity beats bloat. It's a refreshingly direct stance on cinema in an era of three-hour blockbusters, delivered with the kind of confidence that makes you wonder if Hollywood's been getting it wrong all along. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=c9NEPkNpFMU https://www.youtube.com/embed/c9NEPkNpFMU 22 2023-11-11T12:11:45.000Z 25965 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/taylor-swift-is-the-goat-agree-or-disagree 2026-04-15T07:40:41.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/aAislqR5-GA/maxresdefault.jpg Taylor Swift is the Goat? 🐐 Agree or Disagree? A rider declares Taylor Swift "the Bob Dylan of young women" and praises her as someone who's portrayed growing up from girlhood to womanhood like no other artist. Kareem asks if they agree she's one of the greatest lyricists of all time. Another person jumps in to mansplain the situation, insisting they should separate the art from the artist because Swift is "awful and annoying, but she makes okay music." The debate gets heated fast. It's a classic Swiftie versus hater showdown on the train. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aAislqR5-GA https://www.youtube.com/embed/aAislqR5-GA 32 2023-11-10T19:01:34.000Z 30750 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/donald-trump-and-ivanka-trump-the-reason-why-donald-trump-should-be-potus-agree-or-disagree 2026-04-15T07:40:45.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/BeD3jel6dyc/maxresdefault.jpg The Reason Why Donald Trump Should Be Potus 🤔 Agree or Disagree? A stranger shares the provocative take that Donald Trump getting voted out was "the worst thing that could have happened to America," but not for the reasons you'd expect. He argues America should "only have unhinged white men in office" because Trump was "so scary that everyone else realized, 'Oh, we got to do something to stop these crazy white people.'" The conversation veers into whether Kanye is "white in some ways" and a bizarre comparison involving Nutella. Kareem lets the contradictions pile up. It's classic subway chaos. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BeD3jel6dyc https://www.youtube.com/embed/BeD3jel6dyc 34 2023-11-09T12:56:16.000Z 22237 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/on-the-first-date-agree-or-disagree 2026-04-15T07:40:50.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/nhRiZDMmBAI/maxresdefault.jpg On the First Date? 🍑 Agree or Disagree? A subway rider makes a provocative argument: more people should have sex on the first date. Her math is simple. If you wait four dates at four hours each, that's 16 hours wasted on bad chemistry. She thinks women engage in mental gymnastics, holding back because they worry men won't take them seriously, while guys always want to sleep with women they like. Kareem asks about her friends' opinions. It's split 50/50 among women, she says, but men are universally pro-first-date sex. Her take cuts through the usual dating game pretense with blunt economic logic about time investment and compatibility. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nhRiZDMmBAI https://www.youtube.com/embed/nhRiZDMmBAI 51 2023-11-08T14:38:44.000Z 30179 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/olivia-wilde-thinks-that-good-singers-ruin-karaoke-we-100-agree 2026-04-15T07:40:55.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/_BtfapHOb-Y/maxresdefault.jpg Olivia Wilde Thinks That Good Singers Ruin Karaoke 🎤 We 100% Agree Olivia Wilde has a strong opinion about karaoke: good singers shouldn't do it. At all. She tells Kareem that karaoke is exclusively for "the non-good singing community" who pay good money to sing badly, not for people who could get paid to perform. She's terrible at karaoke and takes pride in it. Getting booed off stage? That's the point. Her go-to song is Tupac's "California Love," though she'd prefer "Changes" if venues had it. She even refuses to sing "Happy Birthday" at parties because she'd ruin it. If Justin Bieber showed up at karaoke and sang his own songs, that's just a concert people paid to attend. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_BtfapHOb-Y https://www.youtube.com/embed/_BtfapHOb-Y 61 2023-09-21T19:10:07.000Z 32684 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/bring-back-vine-agree-or-disagree 2026-04-15T07:40:58.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/sYq1XYbi8Xk/maxresdefault.jpg Bring Back Vine 🍇 Agree or disagree? Great video should only be six seconds long," declares an anonymous rider with a passionate plea to bring back Vine. They're adamant. Anything longer? A waste of time. Kareem captures this straphanger's nostalgia for the defunct looping platform that made brevity an art form, back when TikToks were still called Musical.lys and attention spans were somehow even shorter than they are now. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sYq1XYbi8Xk https://www.youtube.com/embed/sYq1XYbi8Xk 6 2023-09-18T18:09:51.000Z 36554 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/this-new-yorker-thinks-america-has-a-bread-problem-do-you-agree 2026-04-15T07:41:03.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/BCQNoB-KVRc/maxresdefault.jpg This New Yorker Thinks America Has A Bread Problem🥖 Do You Agree? A straphanger champions bread consumption in America, claiming people are too worried about feeling bloated. Kareem pushes back on the premise when his interview subject admits they actually avoid bread themselves because of, well, the bloat. The conversation spirals through Sweetgreen's free bread offering, European versus American attitudes, and whether "getting this bread" only makes sense if it's edible. There's a detour into Babe: Pig in the City. The rider thinks pita bread gets unfairly associated with homelessness. Then Kareem pivots to male pregnancy out of nowhere. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BCQNoB-KVRc https://www.youtube.com/embed/BCQNoB-KVRc 60 2023-09-15T14:31:49.000Z 27594 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/new-yorker-thinks-we-gotta-stop-blaming-astrology-for-our-toxic-traits 2026-04-15T07:41:09.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/h8gvJLGLXmk/maxresdefault.jpg New Yorker Thinks We Gotta Stop Blaming Astrology For Our Toxic Traits 🫡 A fed-up New Yorker goes off on people who blame their worst behavior on astrology. She's a Cancer, which Kareem immediately tries to use against her, proving her point exactly. The woman isn't buying any of it. "You're gonna sit there, look me in my face, and say 'I cheated on my girlfriend because I'm a Scorpio'?" she asks. You need therapy, not a birth chart. She's an Aries, and yes, she's heard all the stereotypes about being angry and blunt. Her response? "I'm always angry because you don't know how to pick up your thoughts off the floor." Kareem agrees completely, and they share a perfect moment of solidarity against the zodiac truthers who'll inevitably flood the comments. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=h8gvJLGLXmk https://www.youtube.com/embed/h8gvJLGLXmk 61 2023-09-14T13:45:27.000Z 26501 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/new-yorker-thinks-wearing-flip-flops-is-disgusting-agree-or-disagree 2026-04-15T07:41:14.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/pl76JIE9zug/maxresdefault.jpg New Yorker Thinks Wearing Flip Flops Is Disgusting 🫡Agree or Disagree? A straphanger declares that wearing flip-flops in a metropolitan area makes you "a disgusting person who wants to get a toe infection." The logic? New York City streets are covered in at least "20 different types of strains of fecal matter," from dog piss to human vomit. Kareem agrees with the sentiment but admits he appreciates the occasional glimpse of feet. The conversation takes a turn when the rider argues hands are basically exposed too, but insists gloves aren't practical. Kareem fires back: "hands are just feet on your head." It's a heated debate about urban hygiene standards, complete with contradictory reasoning and zero resolution. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pl76JIE9zug https://www.youtube.com/embed/pl76JIE9zug 61 2023-09-05T16:34:19.000Z 34390 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/for-the-love-of-god-stop-making-podcasts 2026-04-15T07:41:20.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/kXPJx1vrwyw/maxresdefault.jpg For the Love of God Stop Making Podcasts A frustrated New Yorker unleashes a scorching rant about the post-pandemic explosion of wannabe podcasters. He's tired of everyone who "went on Amazon, got a microphone" and now thinks people care about their takes on food, sports, and culture. Podcasting? Just people "jerking themselves off on the air to make pretend they're doing something." Kareem can't help but point out the irony: the guy's currently on a podcast. The rider backpedals instantly, clarifying he's happy to participate in this particular show while roasting all the "Joe Mooks" out there. He then offers an extensive definition of "jamook" (lane brain, idiot, loser, someone lacking grace or social aptitude). The whole thing's a beautiful contradiction. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kXPJx1vrwyw https://www.youtube.com/embed/kXPJx1vrwyw 54 2023-08-17T16:55:26.000Z 27954 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/had-to-end-the-interview-early 2026-04-15T05:21:57.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/VJzgbpFxx_M/maxresdefault.jpg Had to End the Interview Early 🤣🤣 The interview gets cut short real quick when a passenger declares Woody Allen is innocent. That's the entire take. The host clearly wasn't trying to get into that whole mess on camera, so they wrapped it up before things could get any more awkward or controversial. Sometimes you just gotta know when to move on to the next subway car. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VJzgbpFxx_M https://www.youtube.com/embed/VJzgbpFxx_M 8 2023-08-16T13:48:39.000Z 41746 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/do-you-agree-or-disagree-punctuation-is-good 2026-04-15T07:41:25.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/ZEro-k-4orA/maxresdefault.jpg Do You Agree or Disagree? Punctuation is Good. A straphanger defends punctuation with surprising passion, insisting it's "necessary and good, even in text messages." Especially in text messages. Kareem pushes back on the idea that ending a text with a period sounds aggressive or mad, but his conversation partner won't budge. She's all lowercase gang, except for names, and speaks in fully proper sentences to prove her point. The debate gets absurd fast when Kareem starts narrating his own punctuation out loud: "Yes, period. Hey, comma. What's up, question mark." It's a fight about grammar that's really about how we've invented completely arbitrary rules for digital communication. Thanks, period. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZEro-k-4orA https://www.youtube.com/embed/ZEro-k-4orA 60 2023-08-15T15:49:19.000Z 34105 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/do-you-agree-or-disagree-android-vs-iphone 2026-04-15T05:22:04.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/WoYeDKwe0BU/maxresdefault.jpg Do You Agree or Disagree? Android vs. Iphone The host hits the subway to settle the eternal debate: Android or iPhone. Random New Yorkers weigh in on which phone's actually better, bringing their strong opinions about everything from camera quality to the blue versus green text bubble drama. It's passionate. Expect people to defend their choice like it's a religion, because in NYC, even your phone says something about who you are. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WoYeDKwe0BU https://www.youtube.com/embed/WoYeDKwe0BU 61 2023-08-14T14:51:59.000Z 28902 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/do-you-agree-or-disagree-we-agree 2026-04-15T05:22:07.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/wkBMaaXC6HI/maxresdefault.jpg Do You Agree or Disagree? We Agree The host catches a rare moment of total agreement with a subway rider about their hot take. No debate here. Instead of the usual back and forth you'd expect, both of them are completely on the same page, turning what could've been a spicy discussion into an unexpectedly harmonious exchange that's funny precisely because there's no conflict at all. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wkBMaaXC6HI https://www.youtube.com/embed/wkBMaaXC6HI 12 2023-08-09T13:55:26.000Z 48106 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/donald-trump-do-you-agree-or-disagree 2026-04-15T05:22:11.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/mLPC67R-eh0/maxresdefault.jpg Do You Agree or Disagree? The host stops subway riders to ask if they agree or disagree with various hot takes, likely touching on Trump and other divisive topics. It's a quick fire format. Passengers share their unfiltered opinions on the spot, creating those spontaneous moments that make subway interviews entertaining. The episode keeps things punchy and fast paced, perfect for the shorts format where reactions matter more than long explanations. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mLPC67R-eh0 https://www.youtube.com/embed/mLPC67R-eh0 60 2023-08-04T13:11:08.000Z 29914 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/guys-and-girls-cannot-just-friends-agree-or-disagree 2026-04-15T07:41:30.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/5-1fnjtZwtg/maxresdefault.jpg Guys and girls cannot “just friends” | Agree or disagree? A straphanger declares that guys and girls can't be just friends, and she's got the receipts. Biology guarantees someone wants more. She's witnessed it firsthand: boyfriends with "close" girl friends always end up crossing the line. Her theory gets specific: "The minute you start sending memes, you're out of the friend zone. A meme is sex." Kareem watches as she offers to be friends with anyone watching, then immediately catches herself backtracking. They both realize they've just proven her own point in real time. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5-1fnjtZwtg https://www.youtube.com/embed/5-1fnjtZwtg 53 2023-08-03T13:49:26.000Z 43706 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/if-you-hire-a-powerful-lawyer-youre-guilty-agree-or-disagree 2026-04-15T07:41:35.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/WeGCQvH6n20/maxresdefault.jpg If you hire a powerful lawyer you’re guilty! Agree or disagree? A straphanger presents a provocative legal theory: hiring a powerful lawyer should be considered proof of guilt. The logic? You only need someone who can "mend and mold the law" if you're actually scared. Kareem pushes back on the absurdity. What's the alternative strategy? The rider suggests hiring an incompetent attorney who fumbles papers and says "oh, golly gee" to convince the jury of innocence. It's backwards courtroom logic at its finest. The conversation veers into the rider's own brush with legal representation: a middle school suspension where they needed a lawyer to deny saying something they definitely said but won't repeat on camera. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WeGCQvH6n20 https://www.youtube.com/embed/WeGCQvH6n20 61 2023-08-02T19:35:32.000Z 44159 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/do-you-agree-or-disagree 2026-04-15T07:41:39.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/Z1WxesFJ5Sw/maxresdefault.jpg Do you agree or disagree? A stranger on the subway absolutely hates vertical video, calling it "one of the worst things that's happened in 100 years of filmmaking in cinema." His reasoning? "Your eyes are horizontal." Kareem pushes back hard, arguing that when you're holding a phone in front of your face, you don't need vertical eyes to enjoy vertical content. The rider doubles down, insisting he'd "absolutely love to go to a vertical film festival" and declaring that "cinema is still an art form." Their debate gets heated fast, touching on everything from movie theater screens to the very nature of how humans perceive the world. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Z1WxesFJ5Sw https://www.youtube.com/embed/Z1WxesFJ5Sw 56 2023-08-01T01:03:05.000Z 51815 yes https://subwaytakes.wiki/episodes/subwaytakes-trailer 2026-04-15T07:41:44.000Z monthly 0.8 https://i.ytimg.com/vi/mTZcuO9tBzY/maxresdefault.jpg @SubwayTakes TRAILER The trailer for SubwayTakes throws viewers straight into the chaos: mandatory mushrooms, memes as sex, and the controversial claim that "people reading books on the subway need to give it a rest." Kareem catches rapid-fire takes from strangers across the system. Someone defends petty crime. Another rider insists people shouldn't wear shorts. The "white people smile" gets called out. ChapStick theft comes up. One person identifies white privilege on camera while another declares a random TikTok Oscar-worthy. It's frantic, bizarre, and completely unfiltered. This is what happens when you ask New Yorkers for their takes. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mTZcuO9tBzY https://www.youtube.com/embed/mTZcuO9tBzY 39 2023-07-31T19:02:41.000Z 51662 yes