The best things are cash only
Summary
Cash rules everything. A rider and Kareem bond over the superiority of cash-only establishments, from Kingston Tropical Bakery's beef patties on White Plains Road to "the best massages" at reflexology spots that tack on $8 for card payments. The conversation spirals from Ramirez Carnitas to strip clubs. "Any restaurant that doesn't accept cash is classist," the rider argues, because they assume you have a bank account and good credit. He keeps his money under the mattress like Jay-Z, hasn't touched an ATM in 20 years, and quotes Wu-Tang with reverence. The exchange ends with a Heat reference and an ominous flex about staying strapped with a backpack, ready to move in 30 seconds when the heat is on.
Full Transcript
So, what's your take? The best things are cash only. 100% agree. The best food, Jamaican patties in the Bronx, churros from the mommies in the subway. Yes. Or the best massages. Reflexology. It's cash preferred. It's an extra $8 when you want to use your card. They make sure to let you know that it's there's tax, there's service fee, there's tip. By the time you leave, it's $200 precisely if you use a card. And Ramirez Carnitas, you know, it's haram, it's pork, but cash preferred. I've been saying any restaurant that doesn't accept cash is classist. Big fact. 'Cause they got to assume that you got a bank account. They got to assume that you got credit. And you got to assume that they have a good relationship with the IRS. I'd rather with the money laundering.
What's the best thing you've ever bought with cash? I have a a long list. Beef patties, White Plains Road, Kingston Tropical Bakery, and Champion Bakery. Cash only. Rest in peace to Sin City in the Bronx. The Lab Dancers. Cash only.
Wait, Sin City? Rest in peace, Sin City. Are most strip clubs cash only? I think so. I feel like the the ones for people of color, I feel like you could probably go somewhere downtown and swipe a card and go into the champagne. I don't mess with that. It takes away the fun. They're expensing it. Hedge fund bros are expensing it.
Can you expense cash? I think you can withdraw from the ATM and and just say submit a receipt. I haven't used an ATM in 20 years. It's under the mattress.
You keep it under the mattress. I'm like Jay-Z. I'm still spending money from '88.
Wow. I haven't touched the Blueface Hundred in a long time. Wu-Tang said it best. Cash rules everything around me. Cash rules everything around me. Cream, get the money. I keep mine in the safety deposit box.
Oh, I respect that. It's like Robert De Niro said in Heat, you got to be ready to move in 30 seconds or less when the heat is on. That's right. That's why that's why I also have a backpack. Stay strapped.
You strapped. You strapped. There's two questions I never answered. Am I strapped or if I've ever killed somebody?